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Reviews for Underground

By : Lennith
  • From ANON - RedHedLvr on October 24, 2005
    Hot! OMG, so HOT! And very worth the wait. Take that all you nay-saying Mary Sues, flammers and assorted other wackos. Oooo baby, I gotta stop reading this stuff at work.

    Whew, anyway, is it possible this might tie in with Newlyweds somehow? Obviously they are actually having feelings for each other, if Kazuma's little mutterings are any gauge, hee he. Geeze, where do they go from here? They got these unacknowledged feelings just buzzing about, I envision angst ahead. And more hot smut, lots of smut. Just a thought. That would be cool, rather a prequel kind of thing.

    But then there's Tachibana, pardon my spelling. Oh man, how's he gonna react to all this? But then he kind of sensed the sexual tension between these two anyway, right?

    I didn't notice too many typos, a few scattered here and there, but nothing the took away from the "plot", so to speak.

    Ok, I've rambled on enough. Need to get some actual work done.

    Great, fantastic, wonderful job as always!
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  • From ANON - BloodRaevynn on October 23, 2005
    Generally I enjoy this story a lot and look foreward to the next chapter, however there is one little thing that bothers me about the sex scenes in the recent chapters, namely your assertion that anal sex is going to hurt significantly the first time no matter what. I've read multiple resources on the subject of anal sex, and every one of them stated that it should not hurt and there should not be tearing even the first time as long as you're careful and patient about it; my own experimentation with dildos (still a virgin here; oh, and female btw) seems to back this assertion up. Inserting one lubed finger would definitely not hurt unless Ryuuhou was completely tensed up at the time.

    Mind you that I'm not saying that Kazuma and Ryuuhou's first time wouldn't involve pain, since as far as I can tell neither of them are careful or patient, but...well... it was just that the message that no matter what, it'll hurt bothered me.

    Other than that I love the fic.
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  • From ANON - Tavorna on October 23, 2005
    Oh my goodness! I just about died when I saw you had updated! This is my most utterly favourite story on AFF, and I've been waiting for this sex for so long! SO SO SO worth the wait, this is just....no words can describe. There's something about the way you write Kazuma and Ryuhou that's so raw and passionate. I love your descriptions, I love your characterizations; I simply love your writing style. Was too distracted to pick up any errors whatsoever.

    And so finally their first time! I could not have wished for anything better! That was simply perfect in every way. And the mushiness at the end....adorable. I hope to see your next chapter some time in the near future. Also hoping to see the return of Tachibana some time; I love that guy. ^^

    Keep on writing!
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  • From Brightdreamer on October 23, 2005
    *squeeeeee* And now I dissolve into a gibbering fangirl mess.

    *bows and worships and licks your toes*
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  • From ANON - Youkai Dreams on September 25, 2005
    Konnichiwa!
    Hrm, I like this story so far, so I am pleased to say that I will continue reading it. I must point out the many mistakes this chapter holds at this point. A generous amount of grammatical, as well as puncuation errors are evident here, although spelling is alright. I'd encourage an editor, or reading over your work a few times before you post.

    Also, your paragraphs are a bit too long. There are about three breaking points in each of your paragraphs where you needed to- well, break them up. =D I'm not picing on you, these are just grammar and writing rules. You can trust me, I'm very advanced when it comes to English (Language Arts).

    Hrm, there was something else, but I might concern it in the next review I post, or maybe not.

    Just to give you a head's up, I will not review every chapter, only every five or so unless I feel the need to specifically point something out, be it good or bad. If chapter seven (I believe this story has seven chapters if I recall correctly) is the last chapter, I will review that one. If not, I will wait until chapter 10, or if the last chapter comes before then. (Lucky you, I usually don't start reviewing until chapter five!)

    Well, my friend, it is almost 6:00AM here, and I've got to go to bed! I'll read the rest of your chapters later on today.
    -Youkai Dreams

    PS- Sorry that this isn't super encouraging. I have a habit of pointing out mistakes just so authors know what they did wrong. But just to let you know, I really did like this chapter overall. Ja
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  • From ANON - cfox on July 26, 2005
    I like this one it is a little more serious then newlyweds but I like that to . I hope to see more of this lovely story. as well as the others.
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  • From ANON - Minako on July 14, 2005
    Ahhhhhhhhhh! I just loved this story! I love the couplings! I hope u plan on writting a little more to this fic. Its really good
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  • From ANON - Death on June 29, 2005
    Please update soon. I'm getting impatient and I really like this fanfic. It's better than a lot of others I've read.
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  • From ANON - Yasei on June 13, 2005
    *smirks* Awesome lemon! *snickers* Jeez, I can't wait for more, but its been such a long time since you updated. I hope ya plan on continuing this. It's so hard to find good s-CRY-ed fanfiction. It, unfortunatly, doesnt' have the popularity of some of the fandoms out there. GAH! So PLEASE write more!!!! This has to be my favorite RyuKaz story I've found yet!

    ~Yasei
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  • From ANON - Meisa on June 12, 2005
    This is really good and I just wanted to say keep updating please.
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  • From ANON - kyoslover on June 09, 2005
    woot woot! i love it! please update asap!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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  • From ANON - Zika Silver1 on June 09, 2005
    this is good. really really really good! and the omake!! **snickers** allergy season...
    anyways, please keep this up, I love it ^.^
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  • From ANON - plastic bag 346 on June 06, 2005
    sweet
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  • From ANON - vashta on June 03, 2005
    Very nice, update please! When is he gonna get to it? Ok, I am impressed, you didn't jump right to the smut. You have a nice little plot going here. I am eager for the next chap.
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  • From Quycksylver on May 07, 2005
    Oooh! You snuck another chappie in while I wasn't looking! Ya know... I really love the humor in this fic--that one line, "He was suddenly quite sure there was nothing more embarrassing than being caught shamelessly oggling your former enemy's goods," made me laugh so hard my coffee almost came up through my nose. Uhh... might want to post a warning if you're gonna write stuff like that! XD Also, I love the way you write Kazuma...such a naughty, naughty boy...no wonder I'm so fond of him. ^_^ Poor Ryuhou, though... he's gonna get a complex if Kazuma doesn't nail him soon, lol.
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