Reviews for Nami Lemon Saga

BY : Watchop


  • From MickGesitt on February 08, 2021

    @Chapter 5.

    Hm. I figured Fishman Island would have a greater effect on Nami. Nami being molested by Arlong and the Fishman PIrates is a cornerstone of One Piece doujin. There are four vastly different doujins that immediately spring time mind withf tha premise. In order from worst to best there's Nami Saga 3 (the doujin series you based the first few chapters of this story on) the majoirty of the third installment is a flashback of Nami being blackmailed into sex with Arlong and then being whored out to his crew and random pirates. The pre-Time Skip Nami is drawn in Naruhodo's signature borderline grotesque overdone style where she barely resembles herself. Then there's Yamamoto's Two Piece Nami vs Arlong where Nami's character design looks like it's come straight out of the the manga... but the plot is simplistic at best. NAMIKAN by Muten is a huge step forward and distant second place that boasts a beautiful art style and a plot that actually fits into the One Piece story, and shows Nami being subjected to Ceasar Clown's truth serum on Punk Hazard and their questions leading to a flashback of her being molested by fishmen and then raped by Arlong. Then the flashback ends and the horny Nami is set upon some of Ceasar's goatmen.

    And then of course there's my personal favorite: VOYAGE by Carmine of Crimson Comics. It consists of three chapters and was the first NamixArlong doujin I read and it has yet to yet to be knocked off its pedestal. The first chapter sees Nojiko overhear Arlong's plan to deflower her sister so she takes it upon herself to take Nami's viriginity (while at the same time sacrificing her own with a double-ended dildo) in order to keep Nami from having to live with the mortification of losing her first time to the monster who murdered their mother. Chapter two has Arlong make his move with Hachi's multiple hands, Chew's puckered lips, and some thin tentacles playing their part in getting the human woman's motor running before Arlong takes her for a ride on his fishman cock. And then part 3 has Nojiko set Luffy on Nami following his defeat over Arlong and the Straw Hat Captain literally shatters his navigator's previous memories of sex by showing her what good sex with someone you care about can feel like. The NamixNojiko relationship is what shines through in that one. In fact, I use Nojiko taking Nami's viriginity as my own head-canon whenever I write Nami in a sexual context. It also kind of explains why Nami usually seems to be closer with the women they encounter than the men with Vivi, Robin, Lola, and Carrot being the prime examples.

    Anyway, just saying, for a story centered around One Piece doujin, I feel like you skipped a major part of it by skipping over the fishman and not revisiting any of Nami's potential history with Arlong. Instead you went in a different direction and had Nami's 'first time being with the son of a wealthy East Blue merchant she had stolen from at the time'. Granted, canon Nami is a pirate thief who exclusively robs from pirates since - pre-Luffy - she saw them all as criminal lowlives on par with Arlong that deserved to have their treasure stolen. But you can alter your characters however you want for your story. You do you.

     

    And then you ended the chapter with that cliffhanger and Robin's ominous "Because it happened to me too." line. Perhaps this is an reference to her time in prison on Tequila Wolf during the early parts of the Straw Hat separation arc and we'll see something similar to Blooming in Prison by Jun of the rojiura group? Or maybe it will go back even further to Robin's teenage years where she was doing whatever it took to survive in a world where the governing power wanted her dead.

    I'm all for a steamy Nami-Robin scene. But I really truly hope this isn't your way to turning Nami and Robin into the cockgobbling shanks from the Acid-head NamiRobin series that sees them regularly whoring/slutting themselves out for random generic men.

     

    Nice to see you back. Curious to see where you go next.



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  • From SailorNemesis on February 05, 2021

    Chap5, next I wanna see Nami and Robin getting it on!



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  • From MickGesitt on October 17, 2020

    @Chapter 4.

    Nice to see that Nami's back on track with the canon storyline. I wonder if her new powers of foresight are a perverted version of Kenbunshoku Haki. It's said that a person's dormant Haki can be awakened through extreme training or extreme shock. I'd say that Nami's extreme situation in the first few chapters fits the bill. At least she got something out of that horrible ordeal.

    I'll give you credit for finding a fairly clever way of working in Nami's drastically different 'doujin' appearance and attributing it to her time in captivity. BUT, I can't exactly say that I'm fan of the Naruhodo body style. I've been following One Piece long enough that I can just close my eyes and picture just about any character in my mind. And while I'm perfectly willing to admit that Oda's not-so-new post-Time Skip art style where he draws all his attractive women with massive tits and teeny tiny waists is a little ridicoulous. The overdone body style of Naruhodo is VERY ridiculous by comparison. Aside from a passing resemblence in their hairstyle and whatever clothes they're wearing (which are usually quickly removed) Naruhodo's version of most characters don't even really look like their canon counterparts.

    I much perfer the art style of someone like Yamamoto who draws his character so close to their original selves that his doujins look like a scene straight out of the manga. Hell, I'm such a fan of that kind of visual detail that I've pledged money to Yamamoto's patreon. My only 'complaint' about his work is that it's mainly focused on Dragon Ball Z and that he does very little with One Piece but I can live with that.

    Obviously everyone's preferences are different. I can overlook my issues with Nami's altered appearnace by simply ignoring it. This is word-porn and not a comic so I can picture whatever I want even if it contrasts with your distription.

    However, I am concerned about you taking 'plot' elements from ACID HEAD. Once upon a time, I was a fan of Acid-Heads doujins. Nami no Koukai Nisshi 3 (the one with the Thriller Bark zombies) is my favorite out of everything Acid Head has ever done (and probably ever will at this point). Nami looked like herself and there were plot elemeny from the actual series. Plus I've managed to find the uncensored version. Nami no Koukai Nisshi 1 and 2 (where Nami has the soapy sex battle with Kalifa) are decent for the same reason, But things started to go off the railspost Time Skip.  Nami no Koukai Nisshi 6 (the doujin you referenced in this chapter) and Nami no Koukai Nisshi 7 (where she's unconscious in the lab on Punk Hazard) are the last doujins to actually have anything close to a plot. Ever since then every One Piece doujin Acid Head has done has been Nami (and sometimes Robin) having sex with a generic faceless men because they're slutty whores. Those do absolutely nothing for me. I really, really hope that you don't do something similar.

    I guess I'm one of those weirdos that actually likes there to be plot with his porn. That goes doubly for a fic. This is word porn. You can no longer rely on visuals alone. Now you actually have to contribute something to the narrative in order to make it a proper 'story'. So while I AM a fan of you writing a story centered around Nami that ties in various One Piece doujins, I really hope that this chapter's reference to Nami no Koukai Nisshi 6 will be your only dalliance down the Acid Head path.

    But yeah, sorry to unload all that heavy criticism on you. This site doesn't have a lot in the way of reviews so when one of them is extra harsh and critical it can't be great for moral. My criticisms weren't so much against you as opposed to the doujins you've referenced and their artists. There are so few active One Piece stories on this site that I couldn't help myself. But if I'm taking the time to write such a long review you can at least find comfort in the fact your story inspired enough of a response in me to put in all this effort. Most people can't even be bothered and most of the time I'm the same way. So at least relish that your story is special enough to receive one of my rare reviews.

    -Mick Gesitt of the Mountain

    P.S. Because I felt like I was overly critical and want to end on a higher and more positive note. Have you seen the new Bath House Hole doujin by Dorota Bou? It's centered on the already perverted and fan servicy moment of Nami and Robin in the bath house in Wano. The octopus attendants take some extra liberties and then things escalate when the watching men get involved. That's the kind of doujin I can fully support. The art style was spectacular. Nami and Robin looked like themselves  and hell, even the weird-looking Wano men looked accurate. And it was based on an already lewd and perverted scene from the series and dials it up to 11(thousand). If there were more doujins like that, I'd probably be less jaded and critical.



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  • From SailorNemesis on February 18, 2020

    Not happy with Nami's escape in Chap3.  I hope she ends up in an even more depraved situation soon.



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  • From Ookami88 on September 11, 2019

    Pretty good story, if based on a doujin. You have a good style, though you could use a bit of help in editing.

    I might be interested in Beta-reading your stories, maybe throw a suggestion or two. If you want to contact me, I'm Ookami88 on fanfiction.net, a direct link to my profile: https://www.fanfiction.net/u/1823048/

    I find the PM system there much more reliable.



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  • From SailorNemesis on September 08, 2019

    Pretty good, I liked chap 1 better then 2.  If Nami does escape I hope its only to more sexual servitude.  Hoping for preggo sex.



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