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Reviews for Heat

By : Ivadell
  • From Raincloud on January 11, 2006
    Wow. Do you have any idea how much you improved over the course of this story? The first few chapters were a bit hard to read (like looking back on what I wrote when I was 14, yeah?) but by the end you gained so much strength, clarity and flow! I feel absurdley proud of you, considering we've never met. But really, the quality skyrocketed. Also, I truly enjoyed the storyline you came up with, though at times it seemed like you were writting about things you don't know much about; the parts about pregnancy and sex, for example. However, this didn't detract from my overall enjoyment. I found it oddly cute, actually. Is that strange? As a mother myself, Yaten's miscarriage was devastating for me to read. I can't imagine what I'dve done if I'd lost my girl like that. (I hate calling myself a mum, it makes me feel so old! I'm only 18!) In any case, I demand that you continue soon. Yeah, you heard me. I demand. Gimme that sequel you've promised! I wants it! Obey me! Or...er...please?
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  • From ANON - Sera Sutaa Meikaa on August 01, 2005
    *wipes tears from eyes*Ack! That was so sad! T_T Now I need to go post the rest of Starlight Memories. I finished that about a week ago.... But, you know I'm here if you need my help! Well, not so much this week, but drop me an e-mail!


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  • From ANON - ~Moon-Daisuke on August 01, 2005
    ....That was sad....terribly so, but I think you did good. I will definitely look forward to an sequel to see what ends up happening.(This nice sentence translates too "Damn straight you will write a sequel, so we the readers know what happens!") Just kidding, Keep up the fabulous work.... :)

    ~Moon-Daisuke
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  • From ANON - NightSkyLight on July 07, 2005
    Okay, now I wanna cry. That was so sad...=( Poor Yaten and Taiki...anyways, it was wonderful as usual. Please update soon! ^_^
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  • From thewindthesea on July 05, 2005
    Aww.... ;_; Poor Taiki! Poor Yaten! That's so sad. *sniffles*I was crying earlier this evening because of something a friend wrote to me. That made me cry anymore. ^_^;

    Anyways, I'm hoping to be done with Starlight Memories by the end of July. The sequel won't be that long. I mad a Starlights music video. But, it's on a friend's computer. If we burn it, I'll show you.
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  • From ANON - Kayla Tsukino on July 03, 2005
    (to lazy to log in ) at any rate, in the future, if you want to go through a nine month thing where she has a child, or any star light for that matter, then email me and i'd be more then happy to assist in writting a birth sceane. Yet, you did well on your own. because births are much like that, but with a lot of visiable blood, and detailed inch by inch head-first as the child comes out.
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  • From ANON - ~Moon-Daisuke on July 02, 2005
    I loved this.........it touched me so much. I cried so hard because it was really well written.
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  • From ANON - NightSkyLight on June 27, 2005
    I'm American, so you at least have one American reader. ^_^ This chapter was amazing, you are a fantastic writer. I hope to see more soon! Ja!
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  • From thewindthesea on June 26, 2005
    AH! Very nice cliffhanger. I liked that. I only saw a few grammatical errors. If you still need someone to edit your work, I'm here. ^_^ I'm out of school now, so I have days that I have nothing to do. Give me a buzz on my MSN messenger screen name or yahoo screen name...

    MSN- the_wind_the_sea@hotmail.com
    Yahoo- the_wind_the_sea

    I don't have AIM or ICQ, sorry. But, I have some pretty evil cliffhangers myself in my work Starlight Memories, which I have yet to release to the general public.
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  • From ANON - deep serenity on June 15, 2005
    I am interested to see who the enemy is

    now as for the fight/attack scene....well you closed it off all of a sudden and I was confused with the staring why didn't sailor moon and people help?

    anyway I think you have some good stuff but play the whole scene out and don't cut conners on the content. By that (I) feel you leave out some details and rush scenes

    I still like this story and will wait for your next chap
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  • From NightSkyLight on June 14, 2005
    *squees* Wohoo another chapter! I'm always late reading..hehe. It's getting very good, I can't wait to see what happens to Yaten! Hope to see the next chapter soon. ^___^
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  • From ANON - Pen-chan on June 12, 2005
    Fwee! This is so good! ^_^ I've been having fun reading this. Please continue soon, na no da.
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  • From ANON - Sera Sutaa Meikaa on June 08, 2005
    Your Japanese was very good. If you need any help with it in the future, ask me. ^_^; I am studying Japanese and I'm going to Japan next July. ^_^;

    Nice, leave it at a cliffhanger. I'm using my MSN messenger more now, so if you want to instant message me, feel free to.
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  • From ANON - Deep Serenity on May 24, 2005
    Hi, read, 5-6-7. Now I see you have a lot going on now, Galaxia?(I think I like that she is included!) Why did the princess faint in chap 5? That was sudden and weird and Seiya's reaction to is was...lax. After her staring for minutes then fainting for no known reason he should have been more upset.

    Then the "gift" that Galaxia gave Taiki? Why did she give it? and only to him? I think you have a lot of ideas that you are trying to jam into chaps without thinking and explaining them properly(and yes I know you can't tell it all, but as of now they are just to incomplete)

    Chap 7 was good, I like the Common language thing and showing Serena a little grown up. I might have missed why a coucil was needed and what evil is coming their way? I thought they were in peace after glaxia but again I may have missed it, if I didn't then you need to make sure you explain the state of the galaxy in more detail.

    Okay, I hope you took my comments as trying to be helpful, I do like your story, that is why I continue to real, but you need to work on more smoothly connecting all your plots and ideas so they flow better.
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  • From ANON - NightSkyLight on May 23, 2005
    Too lazy to log in..T_T;;

    Cuute! ^_^ I really enjoyed this chapter. Please continue soon, I love your work. ^_~


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