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Reviews for Cho Hakkai - Murderer?

By : menuriko
  • From Nanaka on March 21, 2007
    Another lovely chapter, I'm totally hooked and can't wait to read more
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  • From ANON - Milena on March 21, 2007
    So far I like this story a lot. But there are a few things I like to point out. This is not a
    flame, but meant as constructive criticism. I'll tell you what I thought was good, and what
    was not so good.

    Negative:
    The language is sometimes a bit simplistic. Not overwhelmingly so, but it makes the flow of the story
    a little off, sometimes.
    You use expressions like: "said Gojyo, trying to sound indifferent". It sounds better if you use
    only "sounding indifferent" instead.

    Positive:
    You keep the ikkou well in character, even if you have made Goku a bit more mature than how he is
    portrayed in the anime. Personally, I like that.
    You told a background story why Gojyo and Hakkai are a couple, that is a big plus.
    The plot is good so far, with exciting cliffhangers, making the readers longing for more.
    There are enough details to make the story vivid, but not so much as to make the story confusing.

    All together this is a good fanfic. I rate it +++++.

    Keep up the good work, and post the next chapter as soon as possible.

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  • From Ginny on March 18, 2007
    Oh gods, I saw that one coming, but... gods! Please write more soon! Whaaaa...
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  • From ANON - gen on March 17, 2007
    to answer the title. no.

    you make a very intriguing beginning. and a nice cliffy as well.

    the dream sequence can simply be a warning of future events... hence my answer.
    hmmm. am curious. anticipating more, and soon? or is that asking too much?

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  • From Ginny on March 17, 2007
    Oh man, that's one good start for a story! I'd love to see how this continues! I'd love to read more of this, seriously! Very good!
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  • From Nanaka on March 17, 2007
    woo... I love it so far... I can't wait to read more!
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