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Reviews for My Prey

By : Noin
  • From Yumenoyami on June 06, 2007
    I hope you take no offence, but you should try and get someone to BETA your story. The idea is really, really good, but the grammar mistakes make it to readifficult d. I know how difficult it is, English isn't my mother tongue either, and your language skills will grow eventually, but sorry to say, this fic needs some more work.

    Keep up the good work :)
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  • From on May 11, 2007
    please don't take this offensively, but i wanted to give you a bit of constructive criticism. you are a very idealistic person, your story reflects that. however, it's lacking a lot of finesse in the completion stage. you should find a beta reader, somebody to help you smooth out the issues you have with making the story flow. your main issues lie in the tenses, in making them match up and in grammar. once you've gotten those fixed, your story will be great.

    the idea behind this story is incredible. it's very good and i would have loved to have been able to tell you this story is just as incredible. however, because of the constant errors that are prevalent in this story, it makes it hard to read. i understand that english isn't your native language, and that's all the more reason to find a beta reader to help you fix this story. once you've done that, this story will be incredible.

    keep trying!

    ~hanyou-elf
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