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for I Want You

by AirSpiritX

person akki
schedule December 18, 2004 at 12:00 AM
i like it but you spelle dyohs name wrong other than that its good
person Cece
schedule December 13, 2004 at 12:00 AM
You??? o.O; Its Yoh! But other than that I love your story. Here have a donut. *Shoves donut down your throat*
person Hatira-Daughter_of_Water
schedule July 16, 2004 at 12:00 AM
kute, 2 kute, c u around

~Let the peacefulness of water be still in your walk through life...~

~Hªtﮪ-Dªüghtë®_ºf_Wªtë®~
schedule June 26, 2004 at 12:00 AM
Hmm, personally thought that the fact that Horohoro had an erection too would suggest that the both of them had done something similar to AnnPiriPirika.

Also, it is You. The furigana for his name read \'YO U\'. The \'u\' is commonly translated as an \'h\'- this happens in other words/phrases/titles translated from Japanese as well. I prefer to be exact.

Reviewing mf: Tf: Too much action, not enough dialogue. Need to have the characters talk more. Also need to learn more synonyms for \'penis\' and \'vagina\'. XD
person phoenix
schedule June 25, 2004 at 12:00 AM
its okay but it would be better if we knew how Yoh had a erec, (i, (i\'m not saying it cause i want it, but it makes it confusing) and its YOH not you

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