rate_review Reviews

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2 weeks is nearly up i hope u update soon cos this story is hot

I don't agree with Undisclosed. Long prologues can be a good thing, as long as you know how to write them. In Capitalist's case she wrote it well and didn't take forever and a day to get to the point. It was detailed and introduced the concept of Sakura learning how to become a pleasure slave. It built characterisation for both Sakura and Touya. It showed how Sakura becomes the obedient and complacent slave she is today. And it showed Touya's obvious devotion to his sister and how he would do anything for her, which resulted in him becoming a slave. Each chapter was important. At least it wasn't like...ten chapters. :O If you played Kingdom Hearts 2,then you should know the meaning of a long and pointless prologue, it was more of a 3 hour tutorial -_-; I don't think that jumping straight to the point seems right. That's a problem with many fanfictons.

Will Yue finally push his aside his control issues and admit his love for Touya? Does he even realise he is in love yet? And how does Clow enter the plot? It will be good to have some answers soon. '_- That is all I have to say. It's your story. Besides I know that it will still be good either way.

I'm still reading and it's still awsome!

Hitomi, I think the best thing to do about Mr. "Undisclosed", is to ignore him. He clearly has some hangups that keep him from properly enjoying this work. Don't get me wrong, I actually agree to an extent in regards to the Yaoi, as I myself am straight and such things hold no interest for me(whereas with Yuri my reaction tends be "Can I join you, Ladies?"). He also seems not to realize that with this story it is probably for Capitalist like writing my Sailor Moon fic "Roman Legends"(available in full[yeah, it's complete!] at regular ff.net!) was for me - I knew where I generally wanted to go when I started, but as got further in and fleshed out the OCs more and more, before I knew it i wasn't writing the story, the story was writing itself, I was merely the avatar via which the words flowed onto the computer's screen! Well, that's all from for the moment, and until chapter 30! Laters!

Scorp, I agree wholeheartedly with you. Stories do write themselves... but this one didn't. The ships were already written in stone, and I can tell, since they wrote, in black and white, that the early plot was jst that... Plot.
At the bottom of Parts 6 and 8, They declare their intentions.
If I ignored that, I'd be none the wiser, and would enjoy the entire story... but those lines of text that snub Sakura/Tomoyo and show future support of Sakura/Li were NOT needed, and made it hard to swallow.

I don't understand what you're saying. you would'nt have cared about Sakura's switch to Het if Capitalist had'nt warned about it? What's the big deal?

me love dis
pls upate soon

Hello!

I first began reading your fic about the time the fifth chapter went up. I did keep reading, but then aff.net HAD to redo its self. That led to a long time of not reading PS. About a week ago, something reminded me of your fic and I thought "AH HELL!" and decided to look and see if I could fine it. Low and behold, I was graced and had the pleasure of reading it again. Anyway, here is what I truly loved about the last chapter. First off the length. Got to LOVE long fics. I love that Touya never yields on telling Yue that he is not his salve. I love that Sakura FINALLY figured out that she love Li. The way in which she went about that was great as well. I believe that many people in the fic including Sakura herself thinks she is not as smart as she really is. For one thing, she stumped her brother with the question involving him loving Yue or not. What I love most about this chapter may not seem like something but to me it was. That was the contrast between the kiss Sakura received from Yue and than Li was great. Going back a few chapters I cannot help remembering the scene in the ran! It was not because they made love, but something about it just made me want to try it with my boyfriend. Thanks for the idea! ^__^ Well that's it for now!

This fic is great. I was really looking for a YukixTouya, but I found this one instead.
And thank god I did. I'm looking forward to Yue beating Ralen to a pulp. Or maybe Touya. Oh wait,
maybe Sakura instead. That's impossible, but it sure is hilarious.

I hope you update soon.

-Masuda-san
Goddess of the Fries