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June 17, 2007 at 12:00 AM
i like it =]
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December 22, 2006 at 12:00 AM
I really liked your story good job and i know what it is like to not get alot of reviews on a story so yeah thats why i reviewed.
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June 8, 2006 at 12:00 AM
OMG!!!!! I LOVED IT!!! I WILL FUCKING LOVE U FOREVER FOR WRITING THIS STORY!!! AND U TWO ARE FREAKING HILARIOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OMG I LOVE U SO MUCH!!!!!!!!
e-mai lem sometime. we\'ll chat.
I love you with all my heart, your#1 fan,
Amaya
e-mai lem sometime. we\'ll chat.
I love you with all my heart, your#1 fan,
Amaya
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January 5, 2006 at 12:00 AM
*fangirls* HaruYuki!!! I hardly ever see that pairing, which sucks because it's actually tied formy favorite FB pairing (alongside a KyoTohruYuki threesome). Yayness! Points for writing an excellent White!Haru, Tohru, Kyo, and all the others. The only one who was a little off was Yuki, though that was mostlybecause you made his actions and reactions around Haru a little TOO extreme.
Only a couple things really bugged me...
-Abuse of Black!Haru for a sex scene. I see this as the excuse for sex with Haru too often and it's one of the biggest reasons I'm so selective about what FB fanfiction I read. However, you made up for it by having Haru remember it AND being his confused, sweet self. ^.^
-calling Tohru an "onigiri". The riceball-thing, canon-wise, is just symbolism; she's not made of rice. Luckily, you seem to have caught your mistake halfway in and stopped.
-rushing the sex. WAY too much rushing of the sex. Despite her embarressment about it later, Tohru was awful bold during the act and, especially for a first time, that scene felt horribly rushed. It could have done with a lot more foreplay, or at least implied foreplay. While the scene with Black!Haru was good, the ending WAFFsmut placed Yuki wildly out of character. Within a matter of hours, he's gone from being totally devoted to the girl, to being the willing uke to Haru.Too big of a switch too quickly. If you'd even spaced this scene out with a "several days/weeks later" paragraph, showing Yuki and Haru's relationship progressing, it would have felt more natural.
However, all in all it still fullfilled my daily HaruYuki fix. Thank you!
Only a couple things really bugged me...
-Abuse of Black!Haru for a sex scene. I see this as the excuse for sex with Haru too often and it's one of the biggest reasons I'm so selective about what FB fanfiction I read. However, you made up for it by having Haru remember it AND being his confused, sweet self. ^.^
-calling Tohru an "onigiri". The riceball-thing, canon-wise, is just symbolism; she's not made of rice. Luckily, you seem to have caught your mistake halfway in and stopped.
-rushing the sex. WAY too much rushing of the sex. Despite her embarressment about it later, Tohru was awful bold during the act and, especially for a first time, that scene felt horribly rushed. It could have done with a lot more foreplay, or at least implied foreplay. While the scene with Black!Haru was good, the ending WAFFsmut placed Yuki wildly out of character. Within a matter of hours, he's gone from being totally devoted to the girl, to being the willing uke to Haru.Too big of a switch too quickly. If you'd even spaced this scene out with a "several days/weeks later" paragraph, showing Yuki and Haru's relationship progressing, it would have felt more natural.
However, all in all it still fullfilled my daily HaruYuki fix. Thank you!
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October 22, 2005 at 12:00 AM
What the author of the anime/manga most likely means is that Yuki has chronic bronchitis in addition to asthma (or maybe instead of?)
Bronchitis is an inflammation of the major airways in the lungs, and there are two types: acute and chronic. Acute bronchitis is a brief, two or three week period of the sick person being largely bedridden, with a hacking cough and not much strength, usually experienced following a cold, pneumonia, or other disease with coughlike symptoms.
Chronic bronchitis, which Yuki might have, causes similar symptoms, but instead of clearing up after a few weeks and not really coming back, it\'s a neverending cycle. If he did improve, he\'d only get sick again.
Asthma is a more likely disease, however. Asthma is also an inflammation of the bronchial tubes, and is also usually chronic. But exertion and heavy breathing on already weak lungs will sometimes cause an asthmatic to have difficulty breathing, or even an asthma attack. My father, a pediatric lung doctor, despairs of people who complain of asthma attacks, and he discovers they haven\'t been taking their medication. It doesn\'t matter how much better you feel, the inhaler (most common form of asthma medication currently on the market, or at least the fastest-acting one) is a preventative measure. It should be used before any strenuous physical activity that might cause breathing trouble.
I apologize for preaching, but my father is, as I said, a pediatric pulmnologist, and I can\'t help but notice some of these things.
Bronchitis is an inflammation of the major airways in the lungs, and there are two types: acute and chronic. Acute bronchitis is a brief, two or three week period of the sick person being largely bedridden, with a hacking cough and not much strength, usually experienced following a cold, pneumonia, or other disease with coughlike symptoms.
Chronic bronchitis, which Yuki might have, causes similar symptoms, but instead of clearing up after a few weeks and not really coming back, it\'s a neverending cycle. If he did improve, he\'d only get sick again.
Asthma is a more likely disease, however. Asthma is also an inflammation of the bronchial tubes, and is also usually chronic. But exertion and heavy breathing on already weak lungs will sometimes cause an asthmatic to have difficulty breathing, or even an asthma attack. My father, a pediatric lung doctor, despairs of people who complain of asthma attacks, and he discovers they haven\'t been taking their medication. It doesn\'t matter how much better you feel, the inhaler (most common form of asthma medication currently on the market, or at least the fastest-acting one) is a preventative measure. It should be used before any strenuous physical activity that might cause breathing trouble.
I apologize for preaching, but my father is, as I said, a pediatric pulmnologist, and I can\'t help but notice some of these things.
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September 21, 2005 at 12:00 AM
That is so cute!! I love Yuki and Haru!! *huggles*
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July 26, 2005 at 12:00 AM
i know i probably already reviewed this cuz i remember reading it, but i\'ll reveiw again! i love it, truly truly do! yay for late nights and caffeine!
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July 25, 2005 at 12:00 AM
Kawaii!!! I usually don\'t go for M/M fics, but you\'ve definitely turned me on!
To the fics I mean...
Anyway, keep writing and loving Furuba! Ja ne!
To the fics I mean...
Anyway, keep writing and loving Furuba! Ja ne!
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March 25, 2005 at 12:00 AM
Aawww!!! Soooooo KAWAII!!!!! ^___^ I loved it!!! Angsty, sexy, funny, and-oh-so-sweet........I can\'t believe you didn\'t get reviews for this!!! Oh, and I love the A/N\'s, etc. -- They were almost as good as the story, lol!!! *has a muse and multiple \"personas\" that act that way sometimes* ^___~ Keep up the good work!!! Ja ne!!!
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March 8, 2005 at 12:00 AM
oh!! awesome story!! i loved it!! **dances around teh room on a sugar high**