rate_review Reviews

Ohhh mah gaawwww...... I can't even begin to describe how good this story was. It was all so... ahhh... it's very adult, but for MATURE(I repeat MATURE) people. It's not like those other stories, here sadly, that just go "sex the end". O.o I'm very impressed. There is a lot of psychological action taking place and I really really love those kinds of stories. I was able to see everything clearly; very clearly and it would be an awesome side story to the original much like the 'Death note: another note' novel. And if you don't know what that is (sad for you) well.... its just a novel but its way awesome... >.< I can't believe I hadn't read it before; but now that I have =D its fan art time >.< if you don't mind that is. Now I need to read it over and re-analyze it since I was in that trance where you want to know so badly what happens next that you skim through the details just to get to the end. =D Thank you so much for sharing this ineffable piece of literature.

thank you for your story. thank your friend for pushing you into sharing it. It was dark and lovely and I hope to read more from you.

After chapter 3.....
I have never liked Tohma more than I do now. You are right--they had it coming.

Great story! Must finish now..

great! loved it!

WOW! Who knew that Tohma could kill someone in cold blood?! I always wondered if he had some Yakuza blood in him. Maybe he really is a mob boss\'s son and that would explain why he is always able to do and get away with so much stuff!! cool!! I fully expected K to blow up the building. You know how over the top the guy is!! :D Subject-wise, this was fantastic; structurally grammar-wise, it could have been better. (Ok, Ok. Those probably aren\'t real words - \"grammar-wise\" and \"subject-wise\" - but I don\'t know any other words to use to get my point across. gomen nasai!) The only problem that this story really has is the way that you kept repeating the scenes from chapter to chapter. Maybe if you had just switched back and forth between POV\'s during the chapter - like having one person\'s POV be a paragraph and the next person\'s POV be another paragraph - you wouldn\'t have had to be so repetitive. It would have saved you from having to redo scenes over and over again and be less typing for you - not to mention being a lot less tedious for the reader. Overall though, I really did like this even if I sound mean. I\'m not trying to tear you down so much as just point something that could be improved for both your sake and the reader\'s.
Koneko

I love your sadistic mind.

i praise your sadistic mind

more

O_______________O YOU\'RE DONE?!?! But, but, but...Okay x.x But you better write something else...Or I\'ll be very angry, and I will write you a letter telling you how angry I am. XDDDDD Hans Blix in Team America...Omg

Now...What can I say, other than...Wow. It was a little confusing how you suddenly switched into 3rd person at the last minute, but it wasn\'t a fluke o_O: I don\'t think it would\'ve been as good in 1rst person. And Shuichi is a gem; he\'s a bipolar gem. True story O_o; Even in the anime he acts like how you depicted him in the graveyard- all somber one minute; then screaming the next, and it\'s just...

Touma with a gun xDDDDD That\'s never going to get old. I can just see him in his little Amish hat and his little gloves; toting a pistol. Lmao

Anyways, this fiction was short, sweet and to the point: Aizawa is a jackass; Touma owns a gat; Yuki can be sweet sometimes, and Shuichi is a gem. XDDD Congratulations ::gets drunk on your behalf::

...This was a question I actually ask myself every time I watch that episode: what IF Aizawa had another set of film? O________O And you answered it in your own opinion, and I love this fiction XDDDDD For starters, you show a different side of Shuichi that hardly anybody uses. And you kept Yuki in character (he didn\'t declare his endless eternal love- kudos for you for not ruining him XDDDDDDD) And should I mention Touma with a gun? Of course not, but I just did so fuckit XDDD But aside from being fangirl-y, you obviously love your writing if you want to improve, and that makes me love this fiction even more. You can see a person\'s character inside their writing, how much time and love that they put into it. I\'ve seen people who slack, and people who just copy what somebody else writes for attention or whatever the hell the thought process is for them- you are not one of these people. My hat is off to you, but first I need to get a hat O_o;


I\'ll be checking in for more updates XDD Much love and peace out