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for More than Mello bargained for?

by himema

person Anon
schedule December 10, 2006 at 12:00 AM
lolol wow this is really stupid.

Wow. Don't write.
person anon person
schedule November 26, 2006 at 12:00 AM
first of, try breaking up the text into smaller paragraphs, it makes it easier to read. also watch out for typos (to fix those i noticed in this fic, it would probably be enough to re-read it once)
as for the story itself, i hate to be mean, but i found it rather amusing than hot. kinda like a cheesy porn movie. sorry.
but i really liked to way you called Near a cute little sheep ^_^ ...SO true!

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