rate_review Reviews

It began as just average, but got better bit by bit. I loved the last chapter. The lemon felt forced, but not horrible.

Hi this story ROCKS!!! ive been looking for a story like this for ages :) Is there gona be a zoroxnami? just asking bye

Fairly good start to a fic. Decently written and pretty good story so far.

Although, do PLEASE go through and fix the way you do your dialog paragraphs. I had to read many sections of dialog 3-4 times over just to figure them out and that\'s usually enough to make me give up on reading a fic before I even bother. If you don\'t want to use the boring old \"Robin said.\" when someone makes a statement then at least move the paragraphs such that you don\'t have someone else\'s reaction as the only sentence in a paragraph outside the parenthesis. This section, for example, is very well written, but you need to move almost all of the paragraph breaks like this:

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“I think a game may be what this crew needs.”

Nami raised an eyebrow at that. “What kind of game. If its intellectual, Zoro probably wouldn’t go for it and we may end up explaining some things, no almost everything to Luffy. And then there’s Sanji. I have no idea if he even plays games… besides how many times does it take to get into your pants.”

Robin laughed. “Now, now. He’s not that bad.”

“Oh yeah? Turn around.”

Robin did so, and looked upon Sanji doing a twirl that could rival that of Bon Clay. The only thing he was missing was the Okama’s outfit. “I see your point. But either way, he’s not bad. Nor has he tried anything dishonorable.”

Nami had to chuckle at that.

“What?” Robin looked at Nami, surpirsed.
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Make those changed throughout your fic and it will make for a really nice read!

hi. i\'m reviewing again. I like it so far. Are we gonna see some lemonly Zoroxnami? eh? EH? anyway. continue. yes. do continue.

I think I put the wrong thing, what I meant was that they could get Zoro to do something that annoys him to the point where he snaps. I\'m sure it will be very entertaining to most likely the rest of the crew, other than Chopper who is still confused about a few things that humans do.

Get Zoro to do something that would confuse Chopper, make Luffy and Ussopp to sympathise and pity him for that moment, and probably get Sanji, Robin, and Nami to laugh. I say Sanji because he and Zoro are always at each other\'s throats. Probably have him do something that Luffy and Ussopp have done and had a bad experience with in your story, or in the actual anime/manga.

It\'s not what you think, I\'m more of a fan of LuffyxNami. I just would like to see, or in this case read how far they can push him until he snaps.

My idea for Zoro would either be put on a show for Nami and Robin or tell them about his past. Either way the people might agree.

very cute so far. I\'m curious on who the pairing for the lemon will be. ;)

Please update!

plez cont. I would like to see how this plays out. and I hate it when people start things and then just stop like it never happened.(and I haven\'t seen any lemon yet in this story. you promised there would be some) *puppy eyes* plez cont.