rate_review Reviews

I must say, your idea really does have me intrigued. At first when I read your summary I thought it was going to be Doku/Kou, and so I ignored it for awhile since I don't fancy that pairing. But then I decided to try it (since the pairing was never stated), and then saw that it was non-con. I don't like reading non-con as a rule, but something about your style kept me reading. And the direction you're going in is very "real," if that makes any sense. So many people forget the whole aspect of rape being humiliating, but you didn't. This is how rape-fics should be written - and I would read more of them if they WERE written like this.

I loved how you said that the others of the Sanzo-ikkou would kill Kou and Doku for different reasons. It fit their personalitites perfectly, and it makes the act that much more tragic. Especially when Kou will eventually snap out of this, the knowledge that he raped a respected adversary might destroy him. That's not his way of doing things. Now, that's PERFECT for Nii, who we've already seen has helped gain some control through sex (*cough*Koshuu*cough*). I can tell that you put a lot of thought into this story.

My only bit of crit I have is regarding your parenthesis. I used to use them a lot myself, but I've come to realize that they REALLY throw off prose. If you want to say something inside the parenthesis, either work it in another way, surrounding it with commas usually works, or it is probably not even needed at all and can be taken out. I especially noticed this at the part where Doku was think-talking-whatever about Sanzo and about how he was about to be humiliated again. We know he was humiliated by being raped and violated, you didn't need to put it in parenthesis for the reader. Sanzo's reaction shows all of that to us without you needing to tell us again. If you must, write your story with them in, but when you go to revise and edit your chapter, then deal with them and either take them out or work them in somehow else. It will make your story much more smooth.

And lastly, I'm looking forward to the Ikkou finding out and losing it. :D

Keep up the great work.

-Iapetus

This story holds powerful sentiments and a very angsty/dark tone. I like it~ Keep up the good work (although Sanzo-sama getting raped is by no means good), and I hope to see an update soon! :D

Don't like to see Kou and company that bad.

Wow! this is a way different story. Ya'know one of the best ones I've read in forever and definitly Sanzo abuse for the whole year! You are going to continue this right? This is great no ones done this kind of story before! Keep it up!