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January 21, 2006 at 12:00 AM
Great start. I typically like Chichiri and Tasuki pairings, but my second favorite is Miaka and Tasuki. This is very promising to start with. Can't wait for more.
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January 20, 2006 at 12:00 AM
Very interesting! Something I'll definately be keeping my eye on. I would think that doing the whole Reincarnation thing would be easier with Fushigi Yuugi considering it has reincarnation in the anime! But anyway, I've always LOVED the whole Tasuki/Miaka combination and was getting ready to write my own if no one could come up with a decent story. I'm glad I don't have to now. I will be expecting future chapters soon!
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January 20, 2006 at 12:00 AM
its a pretty good story so far. keep going with it.
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January 18, 2006 at 12:00 AM
Congratulations on posting your first FY story! It made my day to see that it's a Tasuki x Miaka pairing! Thank you also for posting this on all the sites I frequent so I won't miss an update! *cheers*
This is a very promising beginning! I was left with a lot of questions, and that's good- not giving away too much in the first chapter is a great hook to keep a reader coming back for more. I really liked the idea of Tasuki and Kouji being college boys; there's a lot of potential material in that setup! *grins* I also liked the twist of Kouji meeting Miaka first. ^_^
Writing wise, I thought the narrative was good, and that your dialogue was great, especially characterization-wise. The characters' manner of speaking were consistent with their book personas, and you very much succeeded in writing the guys as actually sounding like *guys*. (That's a very difficult thing to do, so major kudos to you for that!) Your pacing is excellent...you moved things along while giving out just the right amount of information to pique the reader's interest. Your mix of dialogue and narrative was a perfect balance too.
I only had one small point of contention, and it had to do plot point. I was shocked to find out Kouji's reincarnation is actually a good student and a nice, successful guy, after he'd accosted Miaka on the street with the intention of raping her. Even though he probably did plenty of that in his past as a bandit, I still found it disturbing and I was upset with Miaka for brushing the assault off when she found out it was 'only Kouji'. (Old friend or not, I would have pepper sprayed the guy and kneed him in the groin to teach him a lesson for messing with me! ) Along with that I was then wondering about the implication of Tasuki's thought that Kouji is out 'banging' some girl. (My thought: Does that mean Tasuki just thinks Kouji's a player, or does he actually know Kouji is a rapist? )
If Kouji is going to be a modern day villain in this, then it makes perfect plot sense he'd hide behind a good guy persona; at the very least, assault and attempted rape makes him a criminal. *shrugs* I guess that's why I was having a hard time accepting him as a good guy in the coffeehouse scene. That's just *my* gut reaction, though (and I'm probably being way too serious and sensitive because of the topic. =P )
Bottom line: it's *your* story, and you should write it the way you see fit! *nods emphatically and cheers you on* Go Chillies and Chocolates! I am looking forward to reading and reviewing your future chapters! (On the other sites too.)
Every good wish, (and happy writing!)
KittyLynne
This is a very promising beginning! I was left with a lot of questions, and that's good- not giving away too much in the first chapter is a great hook to keep a reader coming back for more. I really liked the idea of Tasuki and Kouji being college boys; there's a lot of potential material in that setup! *grins* I also liked the twist of Kouji meeting Miaka first. ^_^
Writing wise, I thought the narrative was good, and that your dialogue was great, especially characterization-wise. The characters' manner of speaking were consistent with their book personas, and you very much succeeded in writing the guys as actually sounding like *guys*. (That's a very difficult thing to do, so major kudos to you for that!) Your pacing is excellent...you moved things along while giving out just the right amount of information to pique the reader's interest. Your mix of dialogue and narrative was a perfect balance too.
I only had one small point of contention, and it had to do plot point. I was shocked to find out Kouji's reincarnation is actually a good student and a nice, successful guy, after he'd accosted Miaka on the street with the intention of raping her. Even though he probably did plenty of that in his past as a bandit, I still found it disturbing and I was upset with Miaka for brushing the assault off when she found out it was 'only Kouji'. (Old friend or not, I would have pepper sprayed the guy and kneed him in the groin to teach him a lesson for messing with me! ) Along with that I was then wondering about the implication of Tasuki's thought that Kouji is out 'banging' some girl. (My thought: Does that mean Tasuki just thinks Kouji's a player, or does he actually know Kouji is a rapist? )
If Kouji is going to be a modern day villain in this, then it makes perfect plot sense he'd hide behind a good guy persona; at the very least, assault and attempted rape makes him a criminal. *shrugs* I guess that's why I was having a hard time accepting him as a good guy in the coffeehouse scene. That's just *my* gut reaction, though (and I'm probably being way too serious and sensitive because of the topic. =P )
Bottom line: it's *your* story, and you should write it the way you see fit! *nods emphatically and cheers you on* Go Chillies and Chocolates! I am looking forward to reading and reviewing your future chapters! (On the other sites too.)
Every good wish, (and happy writing!)
KittyLynne
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January 16, 2006 at 12:00 AM
I like reincarated fics, tho the scene with Koji seemed long to me, OVer all, written okay, and a treat to the eyes.