schedule
April 23, 2013 at 12:00 AM
A nice raw draft. You should flesh it out and continue with your story. The grammar is pretty good overall. I would say that there are many directions this story can take, and that is always a good thing. Continue writing and good luck.
schedule
July 21, 2006 at 12:00 AM
yehas, i like to picture them as the actors who portay them in the movie too. in the movie takumi's more indifferent than shy (like in the manga), and you captured that in your fic. takumi takes the initiative to kiss ryosuke first!