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for Touya's Lullaby

by Chichiriskoi

person ashiya
schedule October 8, 2007 at 12:00 AM
I looooooooooooooove it! I'm so happy I found this story ^^ Please continue! And maybe make the sex last a little bit longer ;P hehehh but really, continue please!
person haesufel
schedule July 10, 2007 at 12:00 AM
oooohhhh....wonderful ^_^
person Anon
schedule June 10, 2007 at 12:00 AM
I really like this story alot. Can you please write some more chapters?
person Aelan05
schedule May 8, 2007 at 12:00 AM
Through the clothing she could feel his tip brush the doors of her forbidden entrance. Every time it happened it would cause her a heavy pain and her gates would thrive to open on their own, as if expecting a visitor. She couldn’t handle it. She needed a citizen in her village walls. She needed Touya. Not thinking of the sticky mass she'd encouter, she stuck her hand in her pants to fill the missing gap. She slid two small fingers in her clit and began to inside with hard, deep, circles. She suddenly felt a cold breeze along her thighs. She looked up to find her precious Onichan had stripped the last of both of their clothes. She had a front seat of his bulge now. The way it hung above her was like bananas hanging off of a tree.

okay.. first off.. what the hell.. second.. what is up with citizens? third.. you can't stick fingers in your clit, its physically impossible.. fourth.. bananas?
person Megan Consoer
schedule November 12, 2006 at 12:00 AM
I really like this story alot. Can you please write some more chapters? Or can you write a sequel to this story please?
person Megan Consoer
schedule September 4, 2006 at 12:00 AM
I really like this story alot. Can you please write some more chapters?
person Kris
schedule August 13, 2006 at 12:00 AM
I wondered into this one by "almost" accident but now I really adore it. please update and this time make Sukura orgasm please, this story is really good.
And if you don't update could you please send the next chapters to my email as I really wanna read them!!!!!!!!!!!!!
person Maria
schedule August 13, 2006 at 12:00 AM
I'm not trying to be mean or anything but I think that there are some things that you need to change in order to really capture what you're trying to say and to keep your audience reading. Number one would be that you need to modify the way that your characters speak to eachother Touya: Hai ... could have been replaced with something else like... Touya then acknowleged me (Sakura) to answer my question .... or something like that but the whole Sakura: (whatever she says) Touya: (whatever he says) thing should really stop if you want to evolve, another thing would be to add more details because I've been in a situation where you want to know the characters better but can't because they aren't mentally described very well... your story however was rather good, but could also be improved upon by how many words per chapter, the places where you end your chapters is really annoying, typically unless it's a pre-view or something chapters are 2000 words, those three chapters could have just been made to be a one-shot and would've worked out better... And fyi, nobody would've told you to not write the fic (as you refured to in the first chapter) because it is in the discription that it's a Touya/Sakura fic and if they didn't want to read that then they shouldn't have clicked on it, if they said anything mean then they are just asses! anyways that was a fairly good fic and I just wanna say that again, I'm not trying to be mean, just trying to help out in your potential career.
person Anon
schedule August 9, 2006 at 12:00 AM
Holy crap, continue this before I freakin' explode with anticipation! This is good rare stuff!
person Tina1239
schedule August 5, 2006 at 12:00 AM
You won't stop here,right?I want read more of this story, it's really good and I love it!

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