schedule
May 20, 2007 at 12:00 AM
this version of ash, and all characters like him, really ticks me off. the story was nice though.
schedule
May 20, 2007 at 12:00 AM
Well that was an average story you need to wrok on your style this story could be good but the dialogue was flat and everything was just a bit boreing if you wroked on that then htis could be a much more interesting story
With Love; Imasuky Lomae
With Love; Imasuky Lomae
schedule
May 20, 2007 at 12:00 AM
a few too many and's. also try to make it a bit longer. but keep up the good work! make another one about what ash does to her next like make her do all of his stuff or make her wear a dog collar or something. its good to see a story about the origonal characters.
P.S. sorry if i sound a bit like an ass!
scincerely, V
P.S. sorry if i sound a bit like an ass!
scincerely, V