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May 5, 2008 at 12:00 AM
Alright, I enjoyed writing my novella of a review last time because it made me take more time to appreciate the chapter. So... The sequel!
"After all, it wasn’t every day you had mind-blowing, toe-curling, forget-your-own-name sex with one of the most famous and obsessive compulsive artists in the world."
Hahaha >_> The part that got me was "forget-your-own-name"
"If he’d ever wondered what his face looked like splashed with come, flushed in mid-orgasm, well now he knew."
Wow- I love this line so much. Awesome delivery. Hehe.
“Did you not take pleasure in my newest paintings, Raito-kun? I took much in the creation them.”
I'm sure you did, L, sure you did... you pervert. I can just imagine L taking breaks and... yeah...
"Visions of the paintings spilling out onto the road to be gawked at by passersby and motorists alike filled his head."
...Wow. That thought makes me laugh really hard. XD Small children passing by going "Look Mommy! What's that?" And the mothers going "Oh... my.... o///o"
"Raito was speechless. L had painted an entire crate worth of paintings as a joke? How many hours did this man have in a day?"
Maybe Raito, just mayyybe, he's been painting those all along and not just after you had sex. Have you yet to register what a pervert L truly is?
"In the artwork Raito was bent sharply forward, without pants, a silky black cloth covering his eyes and a dark flush of excitement on his cheeks. The white business shirt he was wearing hung open and his hands were cuffed behind him, black straps of leather and metal."
...K-Kinbaku Ouji? =3
“I was thinking about how good you’d look as a personalized art piece. Just for me to enjoy, to touch. Would you let me paint you, Raito-kun?”
I would call him a liar, but I know it's just that he's omitting a majority of the truth. >_>
"thinking that it couldn’t be any worse than it already was"
*cue evil laugh from L* You just fell right in his trap, boy. If he paints you full of passion from just normal sex, what else do you think he's going to push you to do to "make his paintings unique"?
"to be made a conversation piece during dinner parties!"
The partygoers all froze as a woman in the middle of the table dropped her silverware quite nosily on her china, a look of awe with a tint of wonder captured her features. The host ran over to the woman, demanding what was wrong with a concerned look in her eyes. The woman imply pointed to the painting of the two men having sex-one bound- on the mantle. In unison, everyone's mouths hung ajar. The host, however, simply smiled. "Oh! It's an L original."
The partygoers smiled and nodded with approval. The woman picked up her fork again and laughed. "So that's why it's so detailed. So..."
XD
“I was thinking about…Watari.”
Raito wants a threesome?!...Raito! (hehe) [as a note further down, I see that's 'how it was taken' too. Haha]
Other things:
Using 'Encounter' instead of 'lovemaking'- Hehe. Yeah, that's what he would do. Make it as foreign and impersonal as possible, Raito...
probable personal pornography- An alliteration! >>; [Loved it]
-I loved your explanation L gave for him 'figuring' that Light was gay. Classy. He would have wooed me with it if I was an insecure man...
Quotes I found amusing and didn't remark on to save space, but still loved:
"The expression was required regardless, the situation couldn’t have happened without it."
"L quirked an eyebrow at him, which Raito somehow heard, his hands never stopping their gentle exploration. Seriously, the guy was a one-man-advertisement for audible expressions."
OH! I guessed! I guessed! I wonder if I was first >_> Anyway, *showers you with love and goes back to studying for finals*
~Ame
"After all, it wasn’t every day you had mind-blowing, toe-curling, forget-your-own-name sex with one of the most famous and obsessive compulsive artists in the world."
Hahaha >_> The part that got me was "forget-your-own-name"
"If he’d ever wondered what his face looked like splashed with come, flushed in mid-orgasm, well now he knew."
Wow- I love this line so much. Awesome delivery. Hehe.
“Did you not take pleasure in my newest paintings, Raito-kun? I took much in the creation them.”
I'm sure you did, L, sure you did... you pervert. I can just imagine L taking breaks and... yeah...
"Visions of the paintings spilling out onto the road to be gawked at by passersby and motorists alike filled his head."
...Wow. That thought makes me laugh really hard. XD Small children passing by going "Look Mommy! What's that?" And the mothers going "Oh... my.... o///o"
"Raito was speechless. L had painted an entire crate worth of paintings as a joke? How many hours did this man have in a day?"
Maybe Raito, just mayyybe, he's been painting those all along and not just after you had sex. Have you yet to register what a pervert L truly is?
"In the artwork Raito was bent sharply forward, without pants, a silky black cloth covering his eyes and a dark flush of excitement on his cheeks. The white business shirt he was wearing hung open and his hands were cuffed behind him, black straps of leather and metal."
...K-Kinbaku Ouji? =3
“I was thinking about how good you’d look as a personalized art piece. Just for me to enjoy, to touch. Would you let me paint you, Raito-kun?”
I would call him a liar, but I know it's just that he's omitting a majority of the truth. >_>
"thinking that it couldn’t be any worse than it already was"
*cue evil laugh from L* You just fell right in his trap, boy. If he paints you full of passion from just normal sex, what else do you think he's going to push you to do to "make his paintings unique"?
"to be made a conversation piece during dinner parties!"
The partygoers all froze as a woman in the middle of the table dropped her silverware quite nosily on her china, a look of awe with a tint of wonder captured her features. The host ran over to the woman, demanding what was wrong with a concerned look in her eyes. The woman imply pointed to the painting of the two men having sex-one bound- on the mantle. In unison, everyone's mouths hung ajar. The host, however, simply smiled. "Oh! It's an L original."
The partygoers smiled and nodded with approval. The woman picked up her fork again and laughed. "So that's why it's so detailed. So..."
XD
“I was thinking about…Watari.”
Raito wants a threesome?!...Raito! (hehe) [as a note further down, I see that's 'how it was taken' too. Haha]
Other things:
Using 'Encounter' instead of 'lovemaking'- Hehe. Yeah, that's what he would do. Make it as foreign and impersonal as possible, Raito...
probable personal pornography- An alliteration! >>; [Loved it]
-I loved your explanation L gave for him 'figuring' that Light was gay. Classy. He would have wooed me with it if I was an insecure man...
Quotes I found amusing and didn't remark on to save space, but still loved:
"The expression was required regardless, the situation couldn’t have happened without it."
"L quirked an eyebrow at him, which Raito somehow heard, his hands never stopping their gentle exploration. Seriously, the guy was a one-man-advertisement for audible expressions."
OH! I guessed! I guessed! I wonder if I was first >_> Anyway, *showers you with love and goes back to studying for finals*
~Ame
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May 5, 2008 at 12:00 AM
Happy to see you're back from your break. Yeah, it was abit fluffly but it was still good writing. Can't wait to see what you do next. ;)
schedule
May 5, 2008 at 12:00 AM
Wow. Love, love love love!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm sooooooo in love with this fic. Its a refresher from all the death note ones out there, a breath of clean non-killing and kira-hating fresh air. I only got to review now because I really wasn't keeping up with your updates, so I missed the debut of your previous chappie. But I liked it very much. It was well executed and I like how you portrayed Raito's nervousness about the whole sex issue. It was really cute. and I totally like this chapter, especially when Raito saw what L had send to him this time. hehehehe L is a huge perv, but I adored the fact that Raito didn't throw any major hissy fit when he called L about the erotic picures. Gosh, I can just imagine how hott those might look, especially the bondage ones. Uber hwatt! But I seriously love this story, it always makes me squeal when I see an update!
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May 5, 2008 at 12:00 AM
Sappy? Yes. But, I can live with that. This chapter was amazing. I blushed dammit!! XD!! Keep writing I love this story!! maa maa you should shove Teru in there to make L jealous!!! COme on it'd be sweet!!!
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May 5, 2008 at 12:00 AM
Aww. I love it. Even if it was quite fluffy. Still made me smile. Update soon! :]
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May 5, 2008 at 12:00 AM
Stumbled across this little piece of fiction and I'm insanely glad that I did. While this is AU you still managed to keep the characters IC... within reason. I am completely happy with the way you depict both L and Light, enough of the orginial to keep them as we know with a twist of something more... that only makes us love them more.
The part that I love the most is simply how they just flow into this AU so well. Whether its by your wonderful talent with words or just because in a AU they could really be an Artist and a Gallery Owner. It works and isn't hard to imagine.
All in all, I do look forward to the next chapters. I'm glad I came across this while in the creating process only because I can enjoy it that much longer.
Awesome story, my dear... I eagerly await the next update. ^^
The part that I love the most is simply how they just flow into this AU so well. Whether its by your wonderful talent with words or just because in a AU they could really be an Artist and a Gallery Owner. It works and isn't hard to imagine.
All in all, I do look forward to the next chapters. I'm glad I came across this while in the creating process only because I can enjoy it that much longer.
Awesome story, my dear... I eagerly await the next update. ^^
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May 5, 2008 at 12:00 AM
I loved this chapter! And the Bound Prince moment...just excellent. Seriously, I wait on the edge of my seat for your story. I'm a horrible reviewer, so I don't review very often. I always feel like there are other people out there that can express my love of this story much better than I ever could. You render me speechless with every chapter. :D
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May 5, 2008 at 12:00 AM
Fluff maybe, but cute fluff, I like fluff just as much as hard core sex...
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May 3, 2008 at 12:00 AM
Wow! That was such an awsome sex scene! You should be proud and thanks for keeping raitio in character! Please update soon!
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May 3, 2008 at 12:00 AM
Im glad you updated. I like the last chapter. Can't wait to read more