rate_review Reviews

Asrella 2008-10-13 id # 3000061985
Hello. First, let me say thank you very much everyone for taking the time to read and or review my story. I sincerely appreciate it and I hope you have as much fun reading it as I did writing it. If someone doesn't like something, *darn* oh well, can't win 'em all! I'll work harder and maybe get 'em next time, eh? My apologies for using the review section to answer a concern. I normally don't do this and would prefer to use e-mail directly, but I could not find an e-mail for Solstice. If I find it, I'll happily remove this post. Regarding my using "The Figure," ...sorry you didn't care for it. I didn't reveal the identity of "The Figure," honestly, because I didn't want to. It wasn't a plot device. It wasn't to irk anyone. It's just the way it came out and I liked it, so it stayed. I guess I could have chosen different descriptors for "The Figure," but, again, I liked it, so using author's privilege, I kept it. Regarding my word usage, in all my stories, I deliberately misuse words and frequently make up words that don't exist. Sometimes, it drives people nuts. Regarding "Flits," however, I believe that word is used correctly. The root word, "Flit," is both a verb AND a noun. As a noun it is: "the act or instance of flitting," (YourDictonary.com), or in other dictionaries, "a light, swift movement; flutter." I used "the light, fluttering movement," definition. I use flit with an "s" just to make it plural, i.e. light, fluttering movements. Please see YourDictonary.com (http://www.yourdictionary.com/flit); AmericanHeritage.com (http://education.yahoo.com/reference/dictionary/entry/flit); and Dictionary.com (http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/flit) among others. Even if I misread these definitions and am totally wrong, I still wouldn't change it cuz you're right, it sounds cool, plus the reader is still able to get the visual. If anyone would like to discuss in detail with me any concerns or just to say "Hey, man, what's up?" please reference subject line stories at brainmaggot@yahoo.com! I'd prefer to chat there because I have no idea how to make a short post.

I don't claim to have all the answers or write perfectly. I just write to have fun and relax, so please enjoy it for what it is. I hope y'all do! ^^

Asrella flits off to make coffee. :)

Sorry to use a cliche here but, if I never read the words "the figure" again, it will be too soon. Other than the 'surprise factor' I don't really see the purpose of keeping Himiko's identity hidden until the escape scene. IMO you could introduce it earlier in the narrative and have the same surprise effect. You have a good descriptive style and a good vocabulary (definitely above the average FF writer's) but some words have been misused. Example: "causing flits" where you've used a verb as a noun (although it does have a cool ring to it when read aloud). I'll have to read more to really get a feel for the story but so far it seems pretty intriguing. ^-^

This. Was. AWESOME! This, Prelude, and Just One Minute were so good I honestly can't figure out how to explain how good they were. My brain is statisfied mush!

HOMFGZ! This has to be one of the hottest fics I've read yet! Not only for the sex but for the action too! Very well thought out and has enough going on with out being too confusing. :3 Thanks so much for continuing to work on this and posting it! I hope to read more from you soon!
- tigoxgirl

P.S. By chance do you have or want art for the scenes in the last chapter? I'd love to see some art and maybe try to draw a few scenes myself! =^~^= Take care!

Oh I checked and my email is hidden and I'm too lazy to log in so it's tigoxgirl at yahoo dot com. ^_^

Great story - I loved every minute of it!