rate_review Reviews

Fine then... if your calling out your guns... Buizel, Sandslash... take 5... let the gentleman do their thing. Anybody want coffee? Don't expect Iota to be back for a while. He has a tendency to disappear for prolonged periods of time.

Wow, that was epic.

ah, looks as if fall has started to settle in. cold weather and beautiful leaves, such an enchanting time of the year.

quietly sipping tea,

a wandering stranger

... You know, it takes me to leave for 2 weeks (Vacation in Hawaii) for you to suddenly appear... o_O how funny. And just when I had almost forgotten about this masterpiece. <_< your a Cruel, Cruel person Iota. Then cliffhanger you left Chapter 5 in... <_< it was tantalizing. I will have my revenge! ... and possibly cake thereafter.

Somatose - I'm trying to improve my writing style with each chapter, it's great practice writing five billion page chapters only to delete them after completion, heh. I agree with what you're saying about Team Galactic, they're presented as very one dimensional at this point, and I really don't like one dimensional characters, so I intend to expound on that topic. Chapter Seven will probably be out by next week. Check my newgrounds thingy for updates and such.

Xain - Yikes, I saved this picture so long ago, I have no idea where I got it from, but if you wanna send me an email I'd be sure to send you the entire thing.

Max - Heh, Slash's story is the only other work I've ever really read on this site, it takes a certain hook to get me to devote time to something. Spelling/Grammatical was a shitstorm the first few chapters, which is why I intend to rewrite them, but as I move forward, I'm trying to cut down as much as I can. Anyway, glad you liked it.

Cerebrate Fate - I think I'll be switching avatars every so often, that is until I find a specific picture drawn to be the Lucario in my story, which is probably far off in the future.

Jinko - Hawaii kicks ass. But yeah, from the jungle of the internet I popped up again, and continue to write..Woo! Welcome back.

Somehow the final scene of this chapter seemed rather cliche. -but enjoyable none-the-less. And I must say you truly are evil... your cliff-hanger endings to your chapters are pure evil... And I shall have my revenge... I SWEAR it! and thereafter We shall have cake... and you may have some.

Saw a mention of the story on Slash's page, thought I'd check it out.

Very nice storyline so far, by the way. You've got some spelling and grammatical errors, but they're by far the biggest problem (and I do so mean that in a good way). I really hope to see more of this story coming soon, I'll be checking now from time to time (the list goes on it seems...)

Happy writing!
Max

Oh and the one thing that kinda struck me was that at the beginning when characters were being introduced, EVERYONE seemed to have black hair (I.E. few exceptions). It's not really that strange or unrealistic, but a little more variety might placate the few OCD-affected peeps out there.

Hey Iota, you got a full screen pic of that avatar you're using? If you can just leave the link in a review on my story. I always check it every day. O_o;

Just completed chapter 6. I must say that your writing style has changed much since chapter one. Spelling and grammar errors are almost non-existent (except Rorak). The story flows very well. Imagery is very descriptive and vivid. Strong, well thought out storyline with many imaginative elements thrown in.

My only qualm is that you have presented certain characters as too black or white. Team Galactice, for example, could consist of many more shades of grey, rather than being presented as such an inherently evil organisation.

Anyway, an excellent effort. So...when is chapter 7 going to be up?