rate_review Reviews

Thank you. *breathes a sigh of relief* I've been debating both chapters 15 and 16 because of the themes in them. I didn't want to glorify the Mafia nor did I want to make it look like rape is ok, even in a yaoi world, where 'rape' is used in a lesser context. Unfortunately, I'd written later in the series Mello bemoaning to Matt 'the first time I had you, it was practically rape!' Which is all well and good in a domestic, half-cutesy scene, but not when you have to go back and write the bloody thing. It's only when you write scenes like those in this story that it occurs to you that Mello really is a violent bastard and a mass murderer; and that it's less cute when Matt's side of the sex isn't so consentual as it is later on.

I'm glad that the chapters worked. 8D

O-M-G
OMG OMG OMFG!
I've just read 16 and I'm a bit in shock. Somehow, I was expecting them to be closer now (after the cute kiss two chapters back.
But this is, actually, closer to my view and imho, more In Character. Imean, h ow badly messed must Mello's mind be now? He was a bit insane before, but now... I can see him capable of something like this (in fact, I rp'd a scene pretty similar to this once...)
It's good that Matt somehow allowed, because a real, 100% rape would make things weird for them (not that this is going to make them easy, but...)

I guess this was hard to write, but is great!

And oh. I'm still unsure, Mello was a virgin?? he mocked matt, but......

If you want the absolute truth, I'm undecided. When I've written the later stories, I've had the background from Miyamashi's 'Twisted Religion' in my head, though I've already deviated right off that. I won't do a spoiler here in case anyone reading the comments haven't read 'Twisted Religion'.

I'm in the chat room at Mattgasm, if you want to cant about this? Tbh chapter 16 is really haunting me. I'm partway through chapter 17, which is supposed to be from Mello's POV, but I'm finding it really disturbing. It might be nice to chat with you.

*grin* Yes, it's about they stopped being so defensive and started actually working ON each other.

Sorry about having to bring them to Britain. I hate it when other writers do that, have them just randomly meeting in Japan or Canada or wherever it is that the author lives. Unfortunately, I've got to work this towards 'It Matters' and they have to be within a short car drive of Winchester for that.

Ohhh But yours is not a real Mary-Sue. For being, she'd need to be 10x smarter than Matt, pretty and a mistery in herself. Matt would fall totally in love with her and foget about Mello, but Mary-Sue, with her awsome powers, would know that someone was in danger and would save Mello. Obviously, Mello would fall in love with her too and ask her for help to catch Kira. Yeah, that'd be a good Mary Sue -_-

^^U sorry for spamming you!

It was all being so sad :( but last chapter melted my hert and I spazzed a bit with the kiss!

So sad.....

You solved the burnt/hair problem very well.
And Mary-Sue is really a mary-sue? LOL

You know how to make a fangirl happy, don't you?
Wow. Mello's dangerous and intense and fricking hot. But I feel sad for him, telling himself he's asexual and all....
Matt, in the other hand, seems to be quite happy for now. His life didn't seem very interesting back in England anyway.

Mello's a virgin too? or he'd fucked with girls? O.o

I don't think Mello would know what to do with a girl. ;) I reckon even in canon, Mello was gay. The whole 'watching Hal in the shower and talking about Near' thing was a bit of a give-away.

I'm glad you like it!

Agree. Women are a no-no for Mello ^^U I feel a bit sad for Hal (she's my fav female character) but I prefer it like that XD

But maybe he was pretending, and had to do it to fool the Mafia guys. was thinking of certain episode of House M.D. where an important man of a mafia group was gay, and he was about to die rather than letting people know.