AFF Fiction Portal
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person RichardH
schedule November 4, 2009 at 12:00 AM
short but sweet... I like it.

however I would love to see what angel has planned... as long as she doesn't blow up another building
person PsychoWardJester
schedule July 6, 2009 at 12:00 AM
Hmmm, not bad so far...I was worried a bit in part 1 because the writing seemed to be degrading. I'm glad it is picking up!

Oh Rocket and your staged terrorism...crazy kids...
person Mizuru007
schedule June 23, 2009 at 12:00 AM
OH SHET. So much action! :0
I've gotta wonder where you get these plot...THINGS from. Is it all IN YOUR MIIIIND, or are you influenced by something?
schedule June 15, 2009 at 12:00 AM
Hi,
I haven't reviewed a story on here before and actually had to make an account to do so. I really like how you brought up the Catch 22 starting Pokemon problem. It is also neat how you incorporated not only an original character but other characters from the game/anime as well.

the only problem i have is being able to follow who is doing the talking. If i may be so bold as to suggest using the tag lines "Said angel" or "Replied Gary" I know a lot of people see these and think "I know who is talking, I'm not stupid!" But in actuality they are there for good reason. If you wanted to go all out you could even format the story like books do and start a new paragraph each time someone new speaks. But i know that your writing this for fun so format need not apply

other than that cool story could use more romance but i can understand how it would be hard to fit that in when they main characters are in a big rush.
person mizuru007
schedule June 15, 2009 at 12:00 AM
AWWWWWWW TODDLER. Take your time, then~ :D

Why was there BOOM? THIS DID NOT HAPPEN IN THE GAME MY BRAIN'S EXPLOOODING.
...I jest.
person mizuru007
schedule June 4, 2009 at 12:00 AM
Good intro, I 'spose.
THERE WAS MUCH COVERED.
I pray this baby updates frequently...I miss mah pokemonxhuman interactionnnn! D,:
person LeiaGirl
schedule May 31, 2009 at 12:00 AM
I just discovered this series today, and I must say that I'm quite hooked. I haven't yet finished the first book, but I'm thoroughly impressed so far. I can't put it down, although people are getting angry at me for not working on my missing assignments I need to turn in before I graduate. (Your story writing skills are just so awesome that I'm ignoring some of the homework that I actually enjoy working on!)

You've inspired me to work on my own fan fictions, and that's something that rarely (if ever) happens.

All in all, I wanted to thank you for these novels. (I'll try to write an actual critique when I am caught up)
person xain34
schedule May 26, 2009 at 12:00 AM
Am I the ONLY one that found this by pure luck? >_>

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