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October 6, 2011 at 12:00 AM
What an AWESOME story. I loved every chapter. Quite possibly the best one I have read in the Hetalia category. I cried at the second ending....even had trouble reading it. I love these two together. Thanks for this story. Looking forward to the next one.
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September 5, 2011 at 12:00 AM
Somehow I don't think Winter is going to like Ivan wearing that talisman, I wonder how that's going to play out... Things seem to be looking up for these two, I'm excited for the next chapter!
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August 21, 2011 at 12:00 AM
First of all, I need to say that this story is very, very good. I'm a firm believer in constructive criticism though, so I'm going to lay a few things out in this review.
Alright, first of all, I absolutely adore the setting. The different civilizations are multifaceted and their depth is just astounding. The adventure/fantasy aspect has me hooked and the folklore alone would be enough to keep me reading. I kind of wish that Alfred had something like that going for his belief system, but he really doesn't need it because Ivan's culture and religion more than make up for it.
I do have some issues with this fic, though. At the very top is how OOC these two are in here. Winter never had a defined character so I'll let you have that one, but it feels like you just took your own original story and slapped a Hetalia tag onto it to get more views. I'm enjoying this story more as an original work starring people who vaguely resemble Hetalia characters more than I can truly say I'm reading it as a fan fiction.
Their characterizations also seem to suffer from a condition I see far too often in fanfics and doujin. Most of these are written by women and for women, I understand that, but one thing writers need to remember is that men are men, regardless of how gay or bi they may be. Pitcher or catcher, and regardless of how emotionally attuned they may be, they are still men. I can honestly say that if you were to change the name and genderswap Alfred I wouldn't have batted an eye or noticed anything off about him. He's coming off as a "damsel in distress" in a man's body, and it's very unrealistic and distracting. You need to remember that men don't react to situations the same way that women do, and they don't feel in the same way that women do. Yes, men do have emotions that are just as strong, but they're just not equal to a woman's in the method that they are expressed.
Which takes me on to my next point: The dialogue. The actual explanations of what is happening are fabulous and I wouldn't dream of asking for any changes. The dialogue, on the other hand, is simply forced and cheesy. It was like you took every sappy line you could find from every romance movie or novel you have ever read or watched and made these guys parrot it back. The conversations not pertaining to their feelings for one another are fine, but the minute the talk turns to that of love they become laughably melodramatic and cliche in everything that they say.
Now don't think I'm flaming you or anything, because I'm not. Like I said in the beginning, I am loving this story and will continue to check for updates, but please try to take some of these suggestions to heart. I'm loving this as an original story at the moment, but there may be a way to turn it around and help me actually see this as a fan fiction about Russia x America rather than a good story about a couple of guys named Ivan and Alfred who are a watered-down version of the before mentioned pair.
Alright, first of all, I absolutely adore the setting. The different civilizations are multifaceted and their depth is just astounding. The adventure/fantasy aspect has me hooked and the folklore alone would be enough to keep me reading. I kind of wish that Alfred had something like that going for his belief system, but he really doesn't need it because Ivan's culture and religion more than make up for it.
I do have some issues with this fic, though. At the very top is how OOC these two are in here. Winter never had a defined character so I'll let you have that one, but it feels like you just took your own original story and slapped a Hetalia tag onto it to get more views. I'm enjoying this story more as an original work starring people who vaguely resemble Hetalia characters more than I can truly say I'm reading it as a fan fiction.
Their characterizations also seem to suffer from a condition I see far too often in fanfics and doujin. Most of these are written by women and for women, I understand that, but one thing writers need to remember is that men are men, regardless of how gay or bi they may be. Pitcher or catcher, and regardless of how emotionally attuned they may be, they are still men. I can honestly say that if you were to change the name and genderswap Alfred I wouldn't have batted an eye or noticed anything off about him. He's coming off as a "damsel in distress" in a man's body, and it's very unrealistic and distracting. You need to remember that men don't react to situations the same way that women do, and they don't feel in the same way that women do. Yes, men do have emotions that are just as strong, but they're just not equal to a woman's in the method that they are expressed.
Which takes me on to my next point: The dialogue. The actual explanations of what is happening are fabulous and I wouldn't dream of asking for any changes. The dialogue, on the other hand, is simply forced and cheesy. It was like you took every sappy line you could find from every romance movie or novel you have ever read or watched and made these guys parrot it back. The conversations not pertaining to their feelings for one another are fine, but the minute the talk turns to that of love they become laughably melodramatic and cliche in everything that they say.
Now don't think I'm flaming you or anything, because I'm not. Like I said in the beginning, I am loving this story and will continue to check for updates, but please try to take some of these suggestions to heart. I'm loving this as an original story at the moment, but there may be a way to turn it around and help me actually see this as a fan fiction about Russia x America rather than a good story about a couple of guys named Ivan and Alfred who are a watered-down version of the before mentioned pair.
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July 10, 2011 at 12:00 AM
anyone who likes to read the reviews before reading the actual story!! Two words, READ IT. That is all!! lol It's an amazing story along with all her others, made me even start writing!!
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June 14, 2011 at 12:00 AM
Another great chapter. You are definitely my new favorite AF author. Keep writing. Your stories are so detailed and I can't get enough of them. I have been checking nearly every day for a new chapter. Keep 'em coming.