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Poke'Scenes	By : NeoNamco Category: Pokemon > General Views: 2706 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Pokemon, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 1-If You Were Gay That Wold Be Okay
- 1
Poke'Scenes

in
the distance we can see Professor oak sitting at the computer. He
laughs and then notices us. “Come on out. I'm not looking at
porn like last time. But i do need to minimize this page.” he
does, and we move closer to him.

“I
was laughing because i received an email joking that Ash is gay. Oh
wow.” he chuckles. “Speaking of email, I've been getting
a lot of f-mail.” a chuckle escapes his throat once again.
“Next you know I'll be getting g-mail.” he bursts out
laughing at his increasingly bad jokes, just like on the actual show.

“F-mail
is fan mail from readers like you. I can't answer it now though. But
it will all be answered later. So until then, enjoy this scene:”

If
Ash Were Gay

Ash,
Misty, Brock, and Pikachu sit on a bench in the park, waiting for
someone to show up. “So whose this Harley guy I've been hearing
about?” Misty asked her denser friend to her right.

“I
think he was an 'it' that dressed like a cacturne and my old friend,
May. Not really sure. I kind of spaced out during that time.”
Ash smiled and put his hands on the back of his head for support.

“Oh
no!” Brock stood up and held his music player up in the air.
“My I pod's battery is low. And i can't stand listening to you
two. Out of here.” he took off running down the sidewalk and
joined a pair of attractive female joggers.

“Pika?”
Pikachu, along with the people watched as their friend ran off.
“What's his problem?” Misty asked.

“Dont
know but i can't wait for Ritchie to get here.” he looked at
his watch. “Just a few more minutes.”

“Is
that so?” Misty stood up from the bench. She seemed to be upset
“Well maybe Pikachu and i will go.” she picked Pikachu up
off the bench and walked away.

“Huh?”
Ash was mightily confused. “Oh well. I don't need her. I have a
guy friend coming soon. Men shouldn't have GIRL friends anyways.”
he crossed his arms and nodded .

Less
than a few seconds later Ash felt a tap on his shoulder. “Hey
ya Ash.” he was greeted by Ritchie, who stood behind him and
the bench.

“Hi,
Rich. What's up?” Ash got up and fist pumped his look-a-like
friend. This followed with Ritchie's stupid annoying trade mark laugh
that made us all go insane during the Pokemon Master Marathon.

“I
got your note that you said you wanted to meet me here all by my self
with no one but me here.” Ash read that part of the note.

“Yeah
that's right. There's something i need to talk to you about. Just
YOU.” Ritchie blushed.

“Is
it about a new poke'mon league?” Ash sighed a depressing sigh
“When will they stop discovering new land and new poke'mon
every few years? It's getting kind of repetitive.” Ash noticed
Ritchie was still blushing “What's up?”

“Oh.
well...i um...want to talk to somewhere else. Somewhere more
private.” Ritchie managed to get out, sweat dripping down his
body.

“Sure
ok. But before i let my stomach growl and blush, how about we go get
something to eat?” Ash smiled.

“Really?”
Ritchie's blush escalated. “WOW! SURE!”

“You
sound even hungrier than i do.” Ash poked his friend's stomach,
making him laugh. 'His laugh makes me want to kill him.' Ash thought

After
the two ate dinner they walked on the beach. It was late in the
evening, and the sun was about to set. “Now what?” Ash
asked, kicking the sand.

“Wa-wa-wanna
lie down and watch the sun set?” Ritchie nervously asked.

“Uh...ok.
That sounds super.” Ash dug into his back pack and pulled out a
pink blanket and spread it out for them to lie on.

'O-M-G!'
Ritchie thought 'This is going perfectly. We ate dinner together, we
just took a stroll on the beach, and now we're about to watch the
sunset on a pink blanket.'

the
two lied down on the blanket and watched the sunset ahead of them. As
time moved on, Ritchie cuddled closer to Ash. “Well that was
fun. Let's go.” Ash sat up to get ready and leave.

“B-b-but
no.” Ritchie said.

“No?
Why 'no?'” Ash questioned. Ritchie sat up with him.

“Ashy,
i dont want this night to ever end.” Ritchie grabbed his
friend's hands.

“Me
neither, but it's bed time.” Ash smiled.

“Ash...i'm
gay...” Ritchie finally admitted.

Ash's
smile disappeared, and a look of shock was spread on his face.
“Interesting.”

“And
i'm in love with you.” Ritchie rubbed Ash's hands in his.

Ash
pulled away from the grip. “I'm not sure how to take that. Your
the only one whose ever come close to showing any kind of feelings
toward me. Well i shouldn't say anyone. Your the only guy.” Ash
pointed at him, sweat dripped down his forehead.

“Want
to kiss?” Ritchie asked, hopeingly and excitedly.

“No.”
was Ash's response.

“Why
not?” he asked.

“I'll
tell you why...” Ash stood up and started to sing:

My
oh my

my
dear old friend

this
wont work out

we
both are men

i
like girls

and
the hole that they have too

that
is why i can't be with you

but
if i were gay

we
would get to lick

and
if i were gay

i
would give you my dick

and
if i were gay

we
could hold hands

but
i'm not gay

so
get away from my ass

Ash
shoved Ritchie away from behind him and continued the song

i
get turned on

when
i see a curvy girl

when
i see a nude guy

it
makes me want to hurl

I
am so fucking straight

That's
why I can't even masturbate

but
if i were gay

we
would fly high

and
if i were gay

we
would do it all night

and
if i were gay

i
would give you my love

but
im not gay

stop
giving me a blow job (this song isn't completely original, it is
a parody of 'if i were gay' by Stephen Lynch)

And
with that Ash was done. Ritchie couldn't believe it. He thought for
sure Ash was a fruit. “But you have a pink blanket.”
Ritchie pointed below them.

Ash
chuckled. “Oh no. this is Misty's blanket. One time the two of
us slept together in the sexual way and she gave it to me. By that i
mean her blanket and her virginity. I got two for one that night.”

Ritchie
ran off crying. “First Gary and now Ritchie. I must be a gay
magnet.” Ash thought and lied back down on the blanket to get
some shut eye.

Back
inside Professor Oak's laboratory, he is no longer there. Instead,
Tracy is there. “Hi everyone. Oak isn't here right now. I know
i'm not as young and hip as the professor, but i'm filling in cuz
he's...busy on the com.”

“Oh
by the way if you want to see some funny videos about Ash being gay,
go to youtube and type in 'if ash were gay' and check out the first
two videos on the list. Especially the second one.” Tracy tells
us.

“Well
anyways, as promised it's time to take a look at some fan mail. They
wont be answered now, but we will preview the questions and answer it
at the end of the show. Here's what they are...”

“What
happened to Brock during his stay with Professor Ivy?”

“Who
is Ash's father?”

“What's
so special about Pikachu to Team Rocket?”

“In
the opening of the original poke'mon show from season one, who is the
girl with the skirt that Pikachu runs under?”

Tracy
finishes reading the mail. “These questions and more after the
show.”

A
Hot Winter Day

(this
story is a parody of the fic 'A Hot Summer Day' by Kristina Chang(on
ff.net).

It
was a very cold winter day inside the Ketchum house during the week
of Christmas. Ash, Misty, and Pikachu sat on a couch watching the
television, while Brock and Delia sat on the other couch, both
asleep.

“Brr.
It's so cold.” Misty shivered, hugging her pink blanket from
the first story.

“Ya
know, cuddling makes people warmer.” Ash implied what they
could do to get warm.

“Oh
yeah?” Misty scooted closer to Ash, but he was quick to get up.

“Yeah.
Professor Oak has a 'cuddling' brand heater at his lab. Let's go over
there and warm up.” he said, going to the front door to put a
jacket on.

Misty
fell to the ground anime style. She sighed and put her jacket on as
well. Before leaving Ash walked down the hall to check the AC.
“There's the problem. It was never even on.” Ash turned
it all the way. “Perfect.” but as he turned to leave he
slipped on a bowling ball that happened to be in the hall and he fell
backwards into the AC, head first, and then to the floor.

Misty
ran into the hall. “Ash, are you ok?” she ran to him,
worried for him.

“I'm
ok. I have a hard head remember?” he rubbed the spot on his
head where the impact happened and Misty helped him on to his feet.
After that the two walked out of the house with Pikachu and on to
Professor Oak's lab.

A
couple hours later Brock awoke in a very damp pile of sweat. “Oh
man. It's so hot.” he stood up from the couch. He was sweating
bullets. “How did it get so hot?” he took off his green
vest and wiped his forehead. Then he noticed Mrs. Ketchum, she wasn't
sleeping. Her eyes were open, but she didn't look so well.

“Mrs.
Ketchum are you ok?” he asked her.

“It's
just so hot. I can't move.” she replied.

“That's
weird. It was freezing not too long ago.” he walked down the
hall and saw the heater. “Aw shoot.”

“What's
the matter?” Delia asked, coming up from behind.

“The
heater is busted.” Brock showed her the badly busted in AC.

“Oh
no.” she took off her sweater as it got hotter. “Someone
stepped on my poor bowling ball.” she noticed the foot print on
the ball and bent down and it.

“Let's
go outside and cool down for a bit.” Brock suggested and the
two walked to the door. He opened the door, only to see white. It was
snow.

“Oh
my. There must have been a blizzard.” Delia realized.

Brock
tried digging through it but it was too thick. “Oh my god.
We're trapped in a house with a broken heater!” Brock panicked.

“Now
calm down, let's go to the tub and get some water running on us.”
Delia took him to the bathroom and then stripped down to their
underwear. She turned on the water, but nothing came out.

“What
gives?” Brock's sweat spread over his body.

“Oh
you know what? I forgot to pay the water bill this month.”
Delia nervously grinned.

“Can
Mr. Mime help us out?” Brock asked.

“No.
he's in hibernation.”

“...Hibernation?
What the fuck!” Brock banged his head on the toilet.

“Calm
down Brock. When you get angry it makes you hotter. We have to keep
our emotion under check.”

“Not
to mention our hormones.” Brock added.

“Huh?
What do you mean?” Delia asked.

“Uh...nothing!”
Brock's turned his focus from Delia's smokin' body, and looked up at
the sealing.

“We
have to figure out something.” she walked out of the bathroom.

'Your
hot-i'm heavy. Let's screw.' Brock thought in his perverted mind, or
shall i say GUY mind.

Meanwhile
at Professor Oak's laboratory Ash and Misty sat in Tracy's bedroom.
“It's a good thing Tracy is busy down stairs answering fan
mail, and Professor Oak is busy on the computer so we can have this
nice warm room all to our selves.” Ash lied down on his back in
Tracy's bed.

“Yeah.”
Misty blushed, lying down next to him. Pikachu was in between the two
though.

“Now
we're free to do whatever we want.” Ash smiled. Misty's blushed
deepened. Then Ash noticed a sign on the wall 'This room's walls are
sound proof.' he read aloud. “Cool. What use could that have
though?” he wondered.

Misty
was bright red now. And very sweaty. 'Tell him you want him to mount
you like a beast.' she thought.

“I
guess the purpose of the sound proof is so when he watches TV or
listens to music he can have the volume up as loud as he wants.”
Ash theorized. Then he noticed a sign next to the sound proof one.
'That's right, baby!' “What could that combo mean? Hmm?”
he wondered.

'Come
on, Ash. Take a hint. Then again he can't take a hint. Everything has
to be explained directly.' Misty thought, getting hotter.

“What
ya thinking about, Mist?” Ash turned on his side and looked
into her eyes.

She
quickly responded “You.”

“Me?
Really?” Ash smiled.

'Yes!
He's happy.' Misty was going crazy in her mind.

“I'm
thinking about my mom.”

Misty's
smile and happiness evaporated. She couldn't believe what he just
said. “Your mom?!”

“Yeah.
I'm worried about her being home alone with Brock. What if something
happens?” Ash

Misty
was relieved at his explanation, but she didn't really care though.
She just wanted him there and now. “Forget about it. She'll be
fine.”

“I
dont think so. I have to find out if she's ok.” Ash got off the
bed and gathered himself up.

“Err.”
Misty couldn't believe how dumb he was.

“By
the was Misty.” Ash started and leaned in and whispered “You
know what we would have done if Pikachu wasn't here right?”
Misty shook her head. “We would have watched 'Hostel.' Pikachu
is too young to see that movie.” Ash put his coat on and walked
out the door with his poke'pal. Misty just glared and followed after
a few seconds.

As
they all ran back to the Ketchum residence, Ash saw visions from the
past, almost like a flashback.

The
vision depicted Ash and Brock sitting back at the house on the couch.
Brock leaned into his little buddy and whispered. “Dude, your
mom is so hot.” then he chuckled. But Ash's reaction was
priceless. The look on his face was of total shock and surprise. He
looked like he had just seen the ending of The Sixth Sense, all the
Saw movies, Fight Club, The Usual Suspects, Unbreakable, Scream, and
The Lion King.

Ash
snapped out of the memory and concentrated on running. The trio
reached the house, only to find the door blocked by a heavy hill of
snow. “I'm coming mom. Help me move this snow, Misty and
Pikachu.” Ash ordered, and the three began getting rid of it
with shovels and other tools.

After
quite some time, the snow was finally out of the way. They ran
inside, Ash the fastest, and stopped in the living room to find Brock
and Ms. Ketchum lying on the floor, almost passed out. “Brock!
What did you do to my mom?!” Ash ran over and took Brock by the
hold of the front of his loose skin. “Ahh!” he backed
away.

Brock
and Delia noticed the door was open. The got off the floor, ran
outside, and dove into the snow head first. A huge sigh of relief was
heard by Ash and Misty from outside. “Why is it so hot in
here?” Misty asked, now starting to sweat.

“I
dont know. I'll go check.” Ash walked back to the spot where he
hit his head and noticed the AC was busted in. he looked around and
noticed the bowling ball. “That should work.” he picked
up the ball and smashed the AC with it. Seconds following, the heat
went off. Then he threw the ball aside and walked back into the
living room to Misty.

“So
now what?” Misty asked.

“Uh...hold
that thought.” Ash kneeled down to Pikachu and whispered “Go
play in the snow.”

“Pika?”
Pikachu's ears tensed, he shrugged his shoulders and did as told,
joining the half naked ones outside. Ash locked the door after the
pokemon exited the house.

“What
did you say to Pikachu?” Misty asked.

“I
told him me and mom need to use my bedroom for a round of hot
boom-chicka-bow-wow.” he raised his eyebrows a few times.

“Ash
that's sick, your mom?” Misty was disgusted.
“I mean
you.” he rolled his eyes.

Misty's
expression was just like that of all the times she got the romantic
feeling on the poke'mon show. She grabbed Ash's hand, and pulled him
upstairs to his room and locked the door behind after a slam.

It
was only a mere few minutes later before Brock and Delia were the
opposite of they had been. The two were freezing, and stuck in the
snow. “Why is this happening to us?” Delia asked.

“Maybe
it's a sign.” Brock thought.

“What
kind of a sign?”

“The
sign that i shouldn't hit you up. That was my goal during this stay.
Now that all this has happened, i know i should stay away from you.”
Brock told her.

“Oh
honey, you wouldn't have had a chance in the world.” Delia
laughed.

“Hey
i got you in your underwear didn't i?” Brock said proudly.

“You
are too cute.” she took her hand out of the snow and rubbed the
top of his head.

“At
least Ash is getting some.” Brock let his head fall forward
into the snow, not far forward, as he was buried up to his neck in
snow.

Meanwhile
inside, behind the locked door of Ash's room...he and Misty are
sitting across from each other at his bed. The bed is a mess, there's
a deck of poker cards spread out. “It's your move, Mist.”
he told her, while looking at his cards.

“Go
fish.” Misty said.

“What
do you have?” Ash asked.

“No.
'go fish' it's what my sisters told me to do before i met you. I
obviously made a horrible mistake.” she shoved her cards
forward, and fell to the ground.

Ash
reached over and took her hand(of cards) and looked at what she had.
“I fold.” he said.

Everything
She Wants

The
classic pokemon battle/walk theme played as Ash, Misty, Brock, and
Pikachu continued on their way through a town. They eventually
stopped at a pokemon center to take a break and heal their pocket
monsters.

Ash
and Misty sat in the waiting room talking, while Brock stood at the
desk hitting on Nurse Joy. “I told you last time, Brock. I'm a
lesbian.” she said as she typed on her computer.

“That's
ok. Just find me a bi girl and we can arrange things based on that.”
Brock winked at her.

“No.”
she walked away.

“So
i said to Harley 'you look like a cacturne!' Ash said, making Misty
and himself laugh.

“I
wish i could have been there to see it.”

“Me
too.” Ash smiled. He had always liked Misty, more so than any
of his other friends. I thought of her as more than JUST a friend. He
thought of her as several things: eye candy, a coach, special
connection, and a sex object, but never as JUST a friend.

“Ash
there's something i need to tell you.” Misty started. Ash felt
nervous and scared. She sounded so serious. Misty looked around at
the people in the center. “But not here. Somewhere in private.”
Ash nodded.

“Hi,
Misty.” the greeting came from a young man with brown hair. A
familiar young man with brown hair.

Misty
gasped. “Familiar person?” Misty asked.

“It's
me, Misty. Girorgio.” he reminded her.

“Oh
yeah, that one guy...” Misty didn't really remember him.

“I
just want to say once again that you are the most beautiful girl in
the world.” he blushed, much like he had the first time he told
her.

“Oh
yeah. You.” Misty remembered him “I thought you were
dating Kacey.”

“I
was. But we had a disagreement. She didn't think Barry Bonds should
break the all time homerun record. But i did. Even before he was 'on
steroids' he won three MVP awards with eight gold gloves, and he has
over five hundred stolen bases. Oh and he's never failed a drug test,
people often forget.” he explained.

“I
dont want to hear your baseball talk.” Misty stuck a 'talk to
the hand' out there.

“Sorry.
Anyways, what ya doin?” he asked

“Hanging
out with my friend here.” she pointed to Ash.

“How
about we talk about basketball? Kacey also didn't think that Lebron
James could be compared to Michael Jordan. But through the first four
seasons of their career, James has the edge. MJ hadn't been to the
NBA Finals yet, Lebron is there.” he went on and on.

“I
dont want to talk about it. I'm busy.” Misty waved him off.

“How
about Matt Leinart? Why did he go from being a top three pick, all
the way down to tenth in last year's NFL draft? Oh well. It worked
out for the Cardinals.” Giorgio continued blabbering on and on
about sport's topics.

“Bye,
George.” Misty waved.

“All
right.” he walked off, depressed.

“That
guy must really like you.” Ash had observed.

“He's
just a horn dog like all males. But it's not your fault. It's
hormones.” she sighed.

“And
how is it that the Ducks won the Stanley Cup?” they heard
Giorgio ask from off in the distance.

About
half an hour later, Brock had joined the two, plus Pikachu in the
waiting room. They all sat their, talking about good times. But their
conversation was cut short when two men walked into the room. Both
were familiar. “Oh no.” Misty was extremely disappointed.

“Misty?”
the two men asked.

“Hi...Danny
and Rudy.” she greeted with a depressing tone.

“You
got older!” Rudy shouted, looking her body up and down, despite
her sitting down.

“It's
legal for us to be together now.” Danny said.

“Buzz
off you two.” she turned her head.

“Come
on Misty. We'll do anything to be with you.” Rudy took her
hand.

Danny
came and took her other hand “We'll even be with you at the
same time.”

“Woah-woah.
I didn't agree to that.” Rudy glared at the bigger guy.

Next
to Misty was a jealous Ash, part of his hair was moving like it was
on fire, very much the same way Misty's hair did when Melody kissed
him in the second movie. “Err.”

Danny
and Rudy noticed he looked upset. “Are you her little sister?”
Danny asked him.

“I
am not!” he yelled.

“No-no.
That's the lucky guy.” Rudy glared at Ash. Ash glared back.

“I
still dont know what you meant by that.” Ash said, still
glaring.

“I
SAID...you'll find out some day.” Rudy replied, also still
glaring

“Misty.
These guys sound perfect for you.” Brock said “Why would
you not want to be with them?”

“I
dont know!” Misty screamed and got up “Just leave me
alone.” she ran out of the room crying.

Somewhere
there's speaking
It's already coming in
Oh and it's rising at
the back of your mind
You never could get it
Unless you were
fed it
Now you're here and you don't know why

Misty
walked down the street, her head lowered, the bangs covering her sad
eyes. “How could this happen? After all the adventures i've
had. No one even seems to care that i have such difficult decisions
to make. And the worst part is...no one's sad about it either.”
she said as she hugged herself.

But
under skinned knees and the skid marks
Past the places where you
used to learn
You howl and listen
Listen and wait for
the
Echoes of angels who won't return

He's
everything you want
He's everything you need
He's everything
inside of you
That you wish you could be
He says all the right
things
At exactly the right time
But he means nothing to
you
And you don't know why

She
continued walking till she was in a park. “It looks kind of
like the one we were waiting at for Ritchie earlier.” she
noticed. After that she sat on the same bench they were waiting at.

You're
waiting for someone
To put you together
You're waiting for
someone to push you away
There's always another wound to
discover
There's always something more you wish he'd say

He's
everything you want
He's everything you need
He's everything
inside of you
That you wish you could be
He says all the right
things
At exactly the right time
But he means nothing to
you
And you don't know why ('Everything She Wants' by Vertical
Horizon. Go to youtube and search 'pokeshipping everything she wants'
watch the video. It's one of the best i've ever seen. Check it out
check it out!)

Misty
sat at the bench, still depressed. She felt like the loneliest person
in the world. “Misty!” she turned to see Ash running
toward her, along with Pikachu, Brock, Rudy, Danny, and Giorgio.

“Oh
great. Here comes the hard penis squad.” she glared as they
came running up to her.

“Misty,
don't worry i'm here.” Ash sat down beside her.

“I
dont care, Ash. I'm not concerned with you.” she scooted away.
“The thing i wanted to tell you can now be told. Everyone needs
to know this.”

everyone
stared right at her, waiting the news she was about to deploy. “You
can't be with all of us in the same room though. I dont swing that
way.” Brock said.

“What
i am about to say will shock you all...i am a lesbian.”

everyone's
jaws dropped. “NOOOOO!” they all shouted in unison
“CHUUUUU!” pikachu

“But
your so hot.” Rudy said.

“I”m
sorry it's just the way i am.” Misty turned her head away.

Out
from behind a tree came Nurse Joy from the pokemon center. “Are
you ready for our date, Misty?”

“Wha?”
Brock couldn't believe it, along with the other guys.

“Sorry,
boys. But i like my self some pussy.” Mist apologized and
walked off hand in hand with Joy.

The
guys all watched as they left. “I'm setting up a spy cam in
whatever room they stay in.” Danny said, and everyone walked
off to their own thing, except for Ash and Pikachu.

“The
love of my life is gone. And i can't go to May or Dawn because they
told me they're lesbians too. And Melody went to Hollywood. And Macey
is ugly.” Ash sighed.

“Pika
pika pikachu. Pika pi.” Pikachu said seductively.

Ash
looked down the path both ways before turning his attention back to
Pikachu. He picked up the electric mouse and smooched him. “Let's
go back to my sleeping bag and sleep.” Ash winked.

“Pi?”
Pikachu was confused, but Ash had already picked him up and started
walking to the site of the sleeping bag. He looked worried and feared
for what might happen next.

To
be continued...

“Ooh
i love twists.” Tracy was excited over the ending to the story.
But... “But i know you guys didn't care for it too much. But
twists are great to have. Write that down in your note book. Watch. I
will.” he does as he said he would.

“Oh
i said i'd answer some fan mail right? Well guess what? That will not
happen today. All of that fan mail is too personal. And if i told you
the answers it would ruin what you think about pokemon and you'll
never read a fanfic ever again will you. Especially this one. So
we're gonna wait till our last episode to do the reveal. That way we
can ruin everyone else's writing career on the net.”

“But
hey, you reviewers out there. Dont be shy to review first of all, but
dont be shy to ask some questions about pokemon that you want to
know, we read all fan mail on this show, besides today's. But ask
something and Professor Oak and my self will answer it. And if we
dont know, we will scout it out. Until next time, i'm Tracy Sketchit
and this has been another episode of 'Poke-Scenes.'”

I
hope you enjoyed. And Tracy is serious. Send in your fan mail, it
could be ridiculous questions about the show(pokemon or poke'scenes,
etc.-even stuff that doesn't have to do with the show. It could be
about sports, movies, you name it.) Oak will answer. See ya
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