Two times the Therapy

A/N: This is an adult version of a story I published over at deviantart.

Summary: A relationship counselor visits Youko and Kieta. What will happen?

"What are you talking about, Obasan?" Kieta asked.

"You two just don't get the relationship between Inukami and trainer. It's a miracle that you two can do anything. I've got a family friend of ours from Hokkaido coming in to teach you two about how to be better." She said. She felt utterly embarrassed by how Kieta and Youko fought like cobra and mongoose. A member of the family should not act that way. She really wished he would be more like Karou-sama.

It was about a week later that they showed up. It wasn't just one person as the old woman had led them to believe. Their counselors were a married couple. He was named Tenka Oroshu and she was Megumi Oroshu. Physically, they were considered quite attractive. She was about 1.5 meters tall, with light blue hair and green eyes. Her threesize was about 88-68-88. She wore a modest office lady's outfit and flats. He was about 1.6 meters tall, with like brown hair and dark blue eyes. He wore a suit and a tie and carried a briefcase.

"I've been sent here to help you out. So let's see where you are now." Tenka said. Youko and Kieta pointed at each other and looked angry.

"It's his/her fault!" They said at the same time. Tenka and Megumi looked at each other.

"Blame games. Personality incompatibilities, yep. Classic dysfunctional behavior." Tenka said.

"This should be routine." Megumi added.

"Whoa! Hold on here! I am not dysfunctional!" Youko shouted. She took it very personally that they took that kind of an attitude towards her. In her mind, she was perfect. She wasn't the one that needed fixing; it was all Kawahira's fault.

"If you weren't dysfunctional, we wouldn't be here." Tenka said. Youko flew into a fit of rage and waved her finger. She teleported Tenka outside in the street, but didn't teleport his clothing with him.

"Mmm... Anger management issues as well... And I'll thank you not to mess with my husband." Megumi said as she waved a finger. This teleported Tenka's clothing onto him and him back into the room.

"You're an Inukami too?" Kieta asked.

"Yea. Now then, I think we should start with individual interviews. I would like to interview Youko first." Megumi said.

"I will interview Kawahira." Tenka said.


"Well, Youko-san... Let's start at the beginning. Why did you choose to form a contract with Kawahira-san in the first place?" Megumi said.

"Well, I was led astray. They told me he was from a wealthy family of Inukami trainers and that he was easy to get along with. The night we met I nearly ended up killing him." Youko said. "I hate his perverted attitude."

"Well. Let's talk about you here. How many trainers have you had before him?" Megumi asked.

"Oh, I forget... Probably about nine or so..." Youko replied.

"I see. Were there any of them that you were particularly fond of?" Megumi asked.

"Only one... His name was Shiro. He was sweet, kind, and loving... Nothing like Kawahira." Youko said. "That was back in the Meji era. I lived with him until he died."

"Hmm... Since then, how many trainers have you compared to him?" Megumi asked.

"What does that have to do with this?" Youko asked, annoyed at the question.

"Inukami and humans alike tend to only remember the good things about life. They tend not to remember the arguments and troubles. Well, don't you think you may be holding Kieta-san to a high standard?" Megumi asked. Youko's face grew red with anger.

"Just what are you implying, missy!? I am not the one that's the problem here!" Youko said with anger.

"Oh really? So tell me, why was Kieta-san fired from his last job?" Megumi asked.

"What the hell does this have to do with things!?" Youko shouted in anger.

"According to what I heard, you got angry at him and teleported him in front of his boss without any clothing on." Megumi said.

"He tried to grope Sendan right in front of me!!" Youko said.

"Okay, so you dislike him being perverted. I agree that is not acceptable behavior. However, your process of eliminating that bad behavior doesn't seem to be working. In fact, if anything, it seems to be making it worse." Megumi noted.

"What!? No! He's just being an idiot!" Youko said.

"Well, to quote Ben Franklin, doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results is the definition of insanity." Megumi said.

"SO YOU'RE SAYING I'M CRAZY NOW!?" Youko shouted. "I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU!!"

"I never said you were crazy." Megumi said frankly. "The sex drive center of the brain is deep inside. You'd have to kill him to affect it."
Youko waved her finger and tried to set Megumi on fire. However, Megumi blocked the fire with a shield. Megumi then left the room and didn't come back for ten minutes.

"I am saying you've tried the stick and it didn't work. You should try the carrot instead." Megumi said.

"I don't know. I think it's Keita's inner nature to be perverted. He has a kind heart... But he's always trying to give it to everyone around him." Youko said.

"And you want him to give you his heart." Megumi said.

"He doesn't understand the first thing about relationships. He thinks women are here only to satisfy his sexual desires!" Youko said.

"So what do you believe men are here to do for women?" Megumi asked.

"They are here to love us, treat us like we deserve and to spoil us." Youko said proudly.

"What if he can't afford to spoil you? Let's say when you first meet him he has a nice job, and then he gets laid off. What then?" Megumi asked.

"Then he'd better find another one fast." Youko replied. "I'm not going to sacrifice anything for him."

Hmm, she's got an over inflated superego. This could take time. Megumi thought. She knew that curing Youko wouldn't be easy.

"I think he does care for you, Youko. He just needs to work through some commitment issues." Megumi said. "You've got to lead him to the correct behavior by luring him there."

"That's easier said than done. Give him an inch that way and he'll take a mile." Youko noted.

"Only if you let him." Megumi replied.

While this was going on, Tenka was sitting opposite Kieta in another room.

"So, let's start at the beginning. Why do you want sex with every woman except Youko?" Tenka said.

"Come on! Every red-blooded guy wants sex!" Kieta said.

"Not every guy." Tenka said. "What about priests? They live happy, celibate lives." Kieta shook his head.

"They must have something wrong with them. I mean, come on, don't you enjoy sex?" Kieta said.

"Well, that is because I do my relationship with Megumi correctly." Tenka said.

"What do you mean by correctly?" Kieta asked.

"First of all, be it human or Inukami, relationships should be one man one woman. We are social beings, but we also are thinking beings." Tenka said.

"What do you mean by that?" Kieta asked.

"How would you feel if Youko were to start hitting on other men?" Tenka asked.

"I don't care. She doesn't want a relationship." Kieta said.

"I think she does. However, you do not." Tenka said.

"What!? I'm young and handsome. I just want to sow my wild oats!" Kieta said.

"Sowing wild oats can lead to a very bitter crop." Tenka said. "From the profile I got, you seem to focus a lot of your energy on one person: Nadeshiko-san. Why is that?"

"Well, she's hot! She's sweet, kind, caring, and a good cook." Kieta said.

"She's also married to Karou-sama." Tenka said.

"She couldn't be married to him. He has a harem of Inukami!" Kieta said.

"Ah, yes. This so-called harem. Are you envious of that?" Tenka asked.

"Of course. Wouldn't you want a bunch of hot babes sharing you?" Kieta asked.

"No. I'm quite happy with Megumi-chan." Tenka said. "Also, this so-called harem doesn't exist. Only one of them likes Karou-sama, and that is Nadeshiko-chan. The others are there for work only. Igusa doesn't date anyone from what I've heard. I've also heard Senka is dating Toushiro-kun. Gokyouya is engaged to Sebastian-san." Kieta refused to believe this.

"No way! Karou-sama has his own harem - and I want one too!" Kieta said.

"Have you talked to these girls about this?" Tenka asked.

"Well, no, but I don't need to." Kieta said.

"You just assume, of course. I'd like to make an analogy here. You've got a gourmet meal waiting for you at home, so why do you continue to go out looking for food, only to end up feeding on dumpster leftovers?" Tenka asked.

"I suppose you're talking about Youko. She is just too demanding." Kieta said.


"Well, if you had a girlfriend, how would you feel if you found her in the arms of another man?" Tenka asked.

Kieta was silent about this for a moment.

"I'd let her do it." He said.

I think we should put that to the test, Tenka thought.

"I also want to have you take a few physical tests. This may be biological in nature." Tenka said.

-To Be Continued-