The Price I Pay Yuki/Shuuichi
folder
Gravitation › General
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
14
Views:
4,202
Reviews:
5
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
Gravitation › General
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
14
Views:
4,202
Reviews:
5
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
I do not own Gravitation, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
Chapter Ten
The Price I Pay:
Chapter Ten:
“Don’t even think that, Yuki.”
“I can’t help thinking that, Shuu, it’s my fault you have AIDS.”
For a moment Shuu was quiet.
“Not necessarily, it could’ve been me that infected you.”
“What?” Yuki glared at the pink-haired man.
“That….that thing that happened between Taki and me, remember? I could’ve gotten it then….”
Suddenly Shuu broke into tears, trembling. Delicately Yuki placed his hand on Shuu’s cheek.
“Shuuichi, it’s not your fault, even if you did get it from that, it’s not your fault.”
“But I should’ve gotten tested then….I should’ve….” Shuuichi let out a sob and clung to Yuki. “And what you tried—everything’s my fault, I know it….my brother got AIDS because of me, now you have HIV….it’s all my fault….”
Unable to think of what to say, Yuki simply held onto his lover as the pink-haired man cried.
‘It’s okay Shuu, it’s okay. It’s not your fault.’ His thoughts went but he couldn’t put them to words; something took hold of his tongue and stopped him from saying what he wanted.
“Everything’s my fault, my brother got HIV from a blood transfusion he had to get because of me—now you have it and I bet it’s because of me—otherwise how did I get sick first?” Shuuichi cried more brushing off Yuki’s arms though he wanted to never leave their warmth.
“Shuu…just because Aizawa…that doesn’t mean you got it first—I could’ve gotten it any time during the years before I met you. You getting AIDS first means nothing.”
“But…but….”
“Enough, it’s not your fault.” Yuki held Shuuichi close once more and kissed his forehead. “It’s not your fault.”
-
After two weeks spent in the hospital Yuki left, this time with more medicine to help control his dissociative episodes.
‘Why do I have to go through this again? It was bad enough the first time—now it’s worse.’
He sighed and walked toward the door to exit the hospital, his medicine in hand, when Shuuichi ran and hugged him.
“Yuki! Yay, you get out today, yay!” Shuuichi held tightly to him, smile beaming on his face. “Guess what? Bad Luck’s doing a concert today—I feel better now. No sick feelings for the past three days.”
“I take it you want me to go to this concert?” Yuki stepped past Shuu and through the hospital doors, his blond hair swaying slightly from a passing breeze. How nice it was to be outside again, to feel the wind, the sun shining down on him. Mainly it felt so good to be alive—he’d come so close to dying…he was still in the grip of death and it made life taste sweet.
“Yuki?”
“I’ll go to your concert.” Yuki took out a pack of cigarettes and a lighter, lighting one as he looked at Shuuichi. “I’ll go, before you even ask, I’ll go.”
“Thank you, Yuki! You don’t know how much this means to me! Thank you! I love you, Yuki!” Shuuichi embraced the novelist and kissed him on the lips, not caring they were in public.
“On second thought maybe I won’t go to the concert.” Yuki feigned irritation, partly smirking when Shuu expression changed to dejection.
“But Yuki….”
“I’m kidding, I’ll go—just settle down, I don’t want people staring like we’re some freak show.”
“Oh, okay Yuki.” Shuu calmed down and gave Yuki another quick hug. “Well, let’s hurry!”
“It’s not starting already, is it?”
“It’s in an hour, I have to leave now or K will hunt me down—and I want to spend as much time with you as possible beforehand.”
“You want me to drive you there, that I won’t do—I want to relax for a bit.”
“But Yuki, please? Yuki?”
“Look you, don’t make me regret saying I’ll go to your concert.”
“…Yuki….” Shuu turned away, pouting, violet eyes gleaming. “It’s our last concert—I wanted it to be special….”
“‘Last concert’? You’re really breaking up the band?”
“Yes.” Shuuichi sighed. “Seguchi agrees that it’s a good idea—he says it’d be too much of a liability having me perform concerts. Today is Bad Luck’s farewell concert.”
“Oh.”
A/N: End Chapter
Chapter Ten:
“Don’t even think that, Yuki.”
“I can’t help thinking that, Shuu, it’s my fault you have AIDS.”
For a moment Shuu was quiet.
“Not necessarily, it could’ve been me that infected you.”
“What?” Yuki glared at the pink-haired man.
“That….that thing that happened between Taki and me, remember? I could’ve gotten it then….”
Suddenly Shuu broke into tears, trembling. Delicately Yuki placed his hand on Shuu’s cheek.
“Shuuichi, it’s not your fault, even if you did get it from that, it’s not your fault.”
“But I should’ve gotten tested then….I should’ve….” Shuuichi let out a sob and clung to Yuki. “And what you tried—everything’s my fault, I know it….my brother got AIDS because of me, now you have HIV….it’s all my fault….”
Unable to think of what to say, Yuki simply held onto his lover as the pink-haired man cried.
‘It’s okay Shuu, it’s okay. It’s not your fault.’ His thoughts went but he couldn’t put them to words; something took hold of his tongue and stopped him from saying what he wanted.
“Everything’s my fault, my brother got HIV from a blood transfusion he had to get because of me—now you have it and I bet it’s because of me—otherwise how did I get sick first?” Shuuichi cried more brushing off Yuki’s arms though he wanted to never leave their warmth.
“Shuu…just because Aizawa…that doesn’t mean you got it first—I could’ve gotten it any time during the years before I met you. You getting AIDS first means nothing.”
“But…but….”
“Enough, it’s not your fault.” Yuki held Shuuichi close once more and kissed his forehead. “It’s not your fault.”
-
After two weeks spent in the hospital Yuki left, this time with more medicine to help control his dissociative episodes.
‘Why do I have to go through this again? It was bad enough the first time—now it’s worse.’
He sighed and walked toward the door to exit the hospital, his medicine in hand, when Shuuichi ran and hugged him.
“Yuki! Yay, you get out today, yay!” Shuuichi held tightly to him, smile beaming on his face. “Guess what? Bad Luck’s doing a concert today—I feel better now. No sick feelings for the past three days.”
“I take it you want me to go to this concert?” Yuki stepped past Shuu and through the hospital doors, his blond hair swaying slightly from a passing breeze. How nice it was to be outside again, to feel the wind, the sun shining down on him. Mainly it felt so good to be alive—he’d come so close to dying…he was still in the grip of death and it made life taste sweet.
“Yuki?”
“I’ll go to your concert.” Yuki took out a pack of cigarettes and a lighter, lighting one as he looked at Shuuichi. “I’ll go, before you even ask, I’ll go.”
“Thank you, Yuki! You don’t know how much this means to me! Thank you! I love you, Yuki!” Shuuichi embraced the novelist and kissed him on the lips, not caring they were in public.
“On second thought maybe I won’t go to the concert.” Yuki feigned irritation, partly smirking when Shuu expression changed to dejection.
“But Yuki….”
“I’m kidding, I’ll go—just settle down, I don’t want people staring like we’re some freak show.”
“Oh, okay Yuki.” Shuu calmed down and gave Yuki another quick hug. “Well, let’s hurry!”
“It’s not starting already, is it?”
“It’s in an hour, I have to leave now or K will hunt me down—and I want to spend as much time with you as possible beforehand.”
“You want me to drive you there, that I won’t do—I want to relax for a bit.”
“But Yuki, please? Yuki?”
“Look you, don’t make me regret saying I’ll go to your concert.”
“…Yuki….” Shuu turned away, pouting, violet eyes gleaming. “It’s our last concert—I wanted it to be special….”
“‘Last concert’? You’re really breaking up the band?”
“Yes.” Shuuichi sighed. “Seguchi agrees that it’s a good idea—he says it’d be too much of a liability having me perform concerts. Today is Bad Luck’s farewell concert.”
“Oh.”
A/N: End Chapter