Beaten

Arya took a deep breath.
“First, to be proper, you should always put your napkin on your lap.” Arya said doing it for her. Eraon looked up, a hesatant but inquisative look in her eyes.
“Then you can serve yourself, or sometimes other people with serve you food. When you take it, you should take a small amount, and put it on your plate. You can put anything you want, but you shouldn’t take more, unless you have finished what you already have.” Arya said.
She scooped some eggs onto the girl’s plate, and she handed the spoon to the fruit to her. Eraon gently scooped a small amuont, and placed it on her plate, careful not to bump anything. She took a little of a mushroom soup, then she set down the ladle.
“now, you can use your knife to cut things into smaller bites, your fork to pick them up, and your spoon for soups, okay?” arya asked.
Eraon nodded. Arya began to eat, and she could feel Eraon watching her carefully. After a minute or so, she saw her pick up her spoon akwardly, and looked at how arya was holding her fork.
Arya discreetly set down her fork, and picked up her spoon slowly, knowing Eraon was watching, and she ate a little of her soup, so she could see how she held her spoon.
She saw eraon gently mimick her, and she ate the soup. She saw her pause after the first bite.
“Do you like it?” arya asked.
Eraon looked up at her, her eyes were wide, and she nodded her head.
Arya smiled.
Arya watched Eraon thorugh the entire meal. She ate four plates full of food, and two bowls of soup. Arya didn’t know she could eat that much, but she knew that came from the utter starvation she had faced her entire life. She was small, too small for her age, but that was because she was malnourished. Although, arya knew, that in time she would be about as tall as her, toping 6’2”. Arya made a mental note, to teach her portion contorl in the coming weeks, but for now, she felt that eraon deserved to feed her starved body.

The passing weeks went by quickly. But it seemed that everyday was harder than the last. Arya was teaching you to read and write, and you were doing well, according to her, but you just felt utterly stupid as you looked at the squiggles and marks. She was teaching you the ancient language, how to read and write, then later she would tech you to read and write in english, as you spoke it. Even as you went on in time, you found you were more desparate to stay close to her. Suddenly the world seemed so much larger as you began to learn. Whenever you went outside, you woulf clutch to her hand for dear life, hide behind her whenever she was talking to someone. You were just too scared to trust anyone than her. At night you could never make it through alone, and you always ended up in arya's bed with her, normally crying, haunted by your dreams nearly everynight. As the time had passed you felt Arya becoming somewhat distant with you, it was strange, but you didn't know her well enough yet to know what that meant. Before, when you were scared at night, she would pull you into her arms, and hold you tightly, and rock you, telling you she was there, and helping you through. Now it seemed that she became tired with the task. She would allowed you into her bed, but she would only put an arm around you, tell you it was okay, and just go back to sleep.
You laied in your bed, slowly you let yourself fall asleep.
You felt hands on you, whips, you saw your mother watching you drug away, you felt yourself thrown down, you saw the shade, you felt your chest being crushed. You screamed, but no one came. You saw your mother as you were beaten, you called out to her, begging her to make it stop. She just stared at you as black shadows hit you. You saw one holding a vile, trying to make you drink. You could taste poison, your body screamed, you begged your mother to make it sop. You saw someone with a red hot sword. They raised it above your chest and it plumeted down. You looked and saw your mother plunging the blade down to make th final blow.
You sat up screaming. Your entire body was sweaty, and you had wet yourself. You jumped out of the bed, falling to a heap on the floor, and then sprinted ot of your room. You opened the door in a flash and ran in quietly. You hesatantly walked up to the bed.
"Mama" you said, as you crawled up onto the bed. You were shaking as you crawled up to her in the large bed. She shifted, and turned over. You started to crawl into her arms, needing to be near her, terrified of your body not being held by another in the night.
"er-Eraon" you heard her say, groggily. Instead of her pulling you into her arms, you suddenly felt her pushing you away roughly.
"Eraon, no, not tonight, you're fine, you know that. Go back to sleep." She said, pushing you away.
You were pushed back, and you suddenly felt a piercing pain in your heart. You felt like you had just been slapped. You stared at her, tears in your eyes, speechless. You wrapped your arms around you tightly, you scooted down to the bottom of the bed, and laid down in a small ball. You could feel your body trembeling, and slowly you moved closer to her feet. You could feel the warmth of her body as you curled up as close to her legs as you could without touching them. You couldn't help but cry. She had rejected you. She didn't want you. You didn't know words could hurt that much, you wished she would have just hit you, then held you in her arms, than just tell you no. silently you cried yourself to sleep, trying to forget what she had said, and imagine her holding you in her arms.
You were in the cell. Your legs and arms were bound. You could feel your body beaing beaten. You saw the glowing red iron with the empire's insignia coming towards you.. They ripped your shirt open.
"NO! NO!" you screamed at them, only to have a hand cover your mouth.
"MAMA!" you screamed at suddenly seeing your mother, the hand falling away at your words.
"That is no child of mine." She said, turnign and leaving the dark room.
You felt the brand touch your chest, and you screamed, and you felt the real pain all over again. The searing of yoru flech and the smell.
You opened your eyes, as you felt someone shaking you awake. You screamed, and tried to pull away, disoriented, not knowing if you were dreaming. You felt your body being pulled agaisnt anothers, and you realized it was your nother.
"MAMA!" you sobbed into her hair,a dn you wrapped your arms around her neck. You clutched to her tightly, as she cradled you. You cried, your heart beating out of your chest. You couldn't feel your legs you were shaking too much, and you could barely breathe.
"Don't let them take me, p-please, mama, keep me, please mama, be my mama!" you begged her, terrified of your dream.
"Its okay, I will, its okay." She said, her voice convincing, but you could hear somehting in her voice, a part of her that didn’t mean it, you couldn't tell.
She pulled you back, and she laid down. She hushed you into the night, until you finally fell asleep clutching desperatly to her.
You woke slowly as sun shone in through the windows. The night before coming back to you. You were alone in the bed, and you sat up. You looked around, and saw your mother coming out of the bathroom.
"Go get washed up Eraon, I need to meet with the Queen, then we can get breakfast. I will be over in a while." She said. Her voice wasn't cold, but it seemed different, strangely different.
You nodded, and quietly made your way back into your room. You stripped off your soiled night gown and got in thte shower.
You thouht about the night. You thought about what you mother had done. She had pushed you away. You felt tears come to your eyes, as a pain shot through your heart. You slid down on the floor, and cried, golding your knees tightly, and rockng. If your own mother didn’t want you, that you would have no one. You had no one to go to. No one else who loved you. You would be alone in the whole world again, and the shade would get you again, and he would hurt you.
You continued to cry in the shower, letting your body fall on its side. You didn’t know how long it took you to stop, but you finally stood and you finfihsed washing, feeling drained of emotion.
You got dressed quietly, and went to your bed to find it clean. You laid down facing the wall, and pulled your body close. You felt tears fall, as you replayed the memory of your own mother pushing you away.
You thought about the pain, the prospect of being alone. You would rather be dead than loose your mother. In that moment, you knew you ahd to do everything you could to be a good girl, and to keep you rmother happy.
You heard a door click open, and you immidiaetly fored yourself to stop crying, knowing your mother wouldn’t like it. You sat up, and slid off of the bed. You looked up at her, taking in her features.
She looked into your eyes for a moment, then looked away.
“come eraon.” She said, and she held the door open. You exited with your head down and walked with her down to breakfast. At the meal, you were given an individual plate instead of bowels to serve yoruselfs. The reason, that was given to your mother was that the cook was away.