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Stay Tuned As Life Continues For Others	By : DanielGar Category: Digimon > General Views: 1519 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Digimon or any of the characters in the show. Nor do I money off of this story.

Chapter List
- 9
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Yutaka rubbed his tired eyes. It felt like there were hundreds of small dry cracks spreading around his eyes. As if he hadn’t blinked in a week, and perhaps he hadn’t. He had been too tired to notice something as trivial as blinking, eating as well for that matter. He hadn’t been sleeping well since his fight with Koushiro and his body was paying the price. His eyelids felt like there were lead weights attached to them, weighing them down. The pain in his stomach had long been forgotten, as the pain a few inches higher had received all the attention.

However even when he laid in his bed and forced his eyes closed, sleep would still not come to Yutaka, as his brain wouldn’t slow down. All he could think about where the things he could have done differently, times when he could have had a talk with his boyfriend, and the possibility that all this heartache could have been avoided. How he once again had opened up his heart just to have it smashed. Granted Yutaka realized it was his doing, but that didn’t make the pain any less severe. It wasn’t just the lack of sleep that added to Yutaka’s pain. Every night Yutaka could hear moans escaping his friend’s bedroom across the hall. As every night Akira had brought a new woman home. Every night Yutaka was forced to listen to other’s love/lust and enjoyment while he was in his room, alone, miserable, empty.

It was late one night but Yutaka could bear it no longer. He wasn’t going to take any more of it. He was going to say something. Yutaka slid off of the bed grabbed the nearest clothes he could find before leaving his room. He ignored the moans as they got louder and faster. He walked to the front door and put on his jacket and shoes and left. A taxi ride later put Yutaka within a couple minutes walk from the conversation he had been avoiding for two weeks. He stared up at the building. It was at this moment a thought popped into Yutaka’s greatly sleep deprived head, ‘there is no way in.’ Yutaka was turning around to try and flag the leaving taxi when an obvious plan presented itself. Yutaka pulled out his cell phone and dialed Koushiro’s number. He stared at the screen. The numbers he had pushed in so many times but never actually called. His thumb wanted to push the ‘end’ button out of reflex, but this time he paid no heed and called. The phone rang twice before being answered.

“Hello?” came a groggy voice on the other end.

Yutaka was surprised by the sound of the voice on the other end. If he hadn’t stared at the number for so long he would have sworn his misdialed. “Hi….it’s me…”

Koushiro let out a loud yawn before answering, “Yutaka…” There was a pause.

Yutaka’s heart dropped. He shouldn’t have called. Koushiro was still pissed at him.

Koushiro continued, “do you have any idea what time it is?”

Yutaka answered weakly, “sorry…I couldn’t sleep.”

“I’ve been having insomnia too. Don’t worry.” Koushiro responded.

Yutaka gave a sigh of relief for not having woke him up. “I’m sorry to hear that.”

“Not as much as I am.” Koushiro quipped.

Yutaka didn’t know why but he let out a small laugh. However once his laugh died out a he let out a sigh. “I’ve missed you…”

There was nothing but silence.

Yutaka reasoned that the reappearance of the silence meant that Koushiro didn’t feel the same way. Too little, too late.

“I’ll let you go…Goodnight Koushiro.” Yutaka said. He pulled the phone away from his ear ready to hang it up when he heard a voice coming from the phone.

“Wait!”

Yutaka put the phone back to his ear, “Yeah?”

“We should talk.” Koushiro said.

Yutaka grinned and sheepishly said, “I thought we were.”

“I mean face to face.” Koushiro clarified.

“Well how about coming down and letting me in then.” Yutaka said.

There was a momentary pause. “You’re already here?”

“Yes. Now hurry up. I’m freezing what little ass I have off.” Yutaka said. The phone went silent leaving Yutaka to wait in silence. He stood waiting, shivering and watching his breath steam in the frosty air. A heavy door swung open on the side of the building sending out an arc of light into the darkness. Yutaka smiled and hurried to the door. He thanked Koushiro, and looked him over. The dark bags under his eyes stood out, as well as his red tear stained eyes. The pajama’s he wore looked like they had been worn all weekend, particularly the red and black spotted pajama pants. Yutaka could only guess at what Koushiro thought of his own dark bags as well as his torn cargo pants. As they walked back to Koushiro’s dorm not a word a spoken, just a lingering silence that put both men at unease.

Once they entered Koushiro’s room the silence was broken as the red haired man sat down on his bed, “you should have let me know that you were coming over.”

“I didn’t know if you would answer my call or not.” Yutaka countered.

“You’re just lucky I wasn’t asleep, or that I answered at all. Otherwise you would have become a meat popcicle waiting for me to respond.” Koushiro responded.

“So I was a little rash…but it worked, didn’t it?” Yutaka answered.

Koushiro nodded and gestured for Yutaka to sit at his desk. Yutaka sat down and the two men started their business. It started with another round of awkward silence. Yutaka noticed that on the desk sat Koushiro’s old laptop that the computer whiz always had with him during their high school days, as well as newly hung pictures from Koushiro’s childhood. While Koushiro noticed that the green in Yutaka’s hair had greatly faded and his natural black roots were pushing out from the bottom. However still neither one said anything. Neither one said any words, instead they were just cherishing the other’s presence, and not wanting to ruin it by saying something that would offend the other and send them storming away again.

Yutaka’s gut tightened. It cramped. It gurgled. He knew what he needed to do. He simply didn’t want to do it. It is a hard thing for someone to swallow their pride, admit that they were wrong and apologize, but Yutaka didn’t know if he was strong enough to do. The words stuck in his throat. His mind panicked. What if Koushiro didn’t accept his apology? What if he made things worse? What if this relationship ended? Yutaka hadn’t been prepared to have his mind flooded with these questions. Yutaka’s eyes darted around. His nose twitched. His ears burnt. His tongue dried. His body shivered. To say the least Yutaka wasn’t prepared for this situation at all, he had never wanted or had to do this in any previous relationship. His mind crashed, and Yutaka gained a blank expression. That is when the words left Yutaka’s heart, made it up his throat and out of his mouth.

“Koushiro I’m sorry.”

Koushiro sat on his bed, and looked down at his feet.

“I’m sorry that I kept those things from you. I was being honest when I said there wasn’t an appropriate time to bring up my family.”

“Just because there wasn’t an appropriate time doesn’t mean you aren’t supposed to tell me about your family. You make time for it!” Koushiro stated.

Yutaka nodded. “I know. It’s just hard to talk about…” Now it was Yutaka’s turn to look at his feet.

Koushiro could see how uncomfortable his boyfriend was from experience. He knew how difficult it is to talk about a deceased loved one. Koushiro leaned forward and placed a reassuring hand on Yutaka’s knee. “I know it’s difficult. If you don’t want to tell me right now that’s fine.”

Yutaka sighed. “I’ll be fine. It’s just; I’m sorry you had to learn about me the way you did. I should have told you. Instead….”

“It’s okay now, Yutaka. I know now.”

But that was a problem that Yutaka had. He wasn’t sure if Koushiro knew. Really knew. “What did my grandfather tell you about my family?” Yutaka questioned.

“Not much. He told me that your parents died in a car crash seven years ago. And to make matters worse that your grandmother died three years ago.” Koushiro replied.

Yutaka shook his head and put his head in his hands, and let out another sigh. He knew that his Grandfather wouldn’t tell the whole story. Why would he when it would paint him to be the monster he truly was? When Yutaka lifted his head back up Koushiro could see the anger in the drummer’s face. How his eyes glowed with the burning flames of hatred. “He didn’t tell you then that he never liked my dad? How he would always berate and belittle him. How when seven years ago when my mom asked her own father for a small loan he laughed and her, and said the only way he would loan her the money is if she divorced my dad? Did he tell you that my parents’ car crash happened after having a huge argument my grandfather, then heading to their second job on Christmas?”

Koushiro’s mouth hung open. He didn’t know what to say. What could he say?

Even if Koushiro did know what to say Yutaka wasn’t done. “Perhaps he mentioned that afterwards he wanted to send me to an orphanage but my grandmother fought with him and brought me to their house. If not that, then he surely mentioned how he would berate me every day when I came home from school. How he made my life a living hell. But if he didn’t want to talk about me then I’m sure he told you how he wouldn’t allow his own sick wife to visit a doctor for years saying it was just a waste of time and money. He must have told you that even after she had collapsed one day while I was at school and taken to the hospital, how he was still certain she was faking the illness just to spite him. He must have told you that after she died he blamed me for her death, how he said that I had caused her to smoke all those years, that I had caused her cancer. That I was to blame for all of my family’s deaths.”

Tears were welling up in Yutaka’s eyes. “He must have told you then that when he found out that I thought I was bisexual, that he sent me to a therapist. Or maybe he talked about how he would pay or blackmail my boyfriends away from me. And when I finally had enough and called him out on his bullshit he kicked me out of his house and disowned me?” Yutaka went to continue but the words were jammed in his throat. Unable to make it out due to his sobbing.

Koushiro walked over to Yutaka and bent down and wrapped his arms around him. “I’m sorry Yutaka.” Koushiro choked out, his eyes too held tears. “I didn’t know any of that. If I did I wouldn’t have been angry with you.” He squeezed Yutaka some more. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know.”

Yutaka squeezed his boyfriend back. He missed the feeling of the warm body against his. Holding Koushiro in his arms he could feel the hatred for his grandfather melt away. It’s hard to be angry when a wave of love is washing away the depression inside of you. He held onto his love. His sobbing slowed down. His eyes slowed their waterfalls. “It’s okay, Koushiro. You didn’t know. I should have told you all of this a long time ago.”

Koushiro sniffled. “I love you Yutaka. I’ve really missed you.” He squeezed Yutaka as tight as he could, as any weaker and he was certain that Yutaka would disappear from his life again.

“I love you too. And I missed you like you wouldn’t believe.”

Koushiro sighed and rested his head against Yutaka’s. “Let’s not fight anymore, okay?”

Yutaka nodded lightly. “Okay.” He turned his head and gently kissed the smooth cheek that he had missed so much.

Koushiro let out a loud yawn. His eyes suddenly very heavy.

Yutaka let out a yawn also. He stood up and took a few steps towards the door. “I suppose I should head back home now. Let you get some sleep.”

Koushrio rubbed his eyes, “Why don’t you just stay here Yutaka? It’s late.”

Yutaka gave his best smile, which isn’t saying much when only the edges are awake enough to shift ever so slightly upwards. “I’d like that.”

Koushiro slid his t-shirt off his body followed by his pajama pants, and wearing only his boxers slipped into the small bed.

Yutaka ditched his socks. Stepped out of his pants. Removed his shirt. And he too entered the small bed next to his red haired love. Yutaka snuggled up to the one he had missed so much. He could feel the warm smooth skin of Koushiro’s back against his chest. Knowing this warmth and love, Yutaka couldn’t figure out why anyone would ever want to leave this moment. He raised his head gently and kissed his boyfriend’s cheek again. “Goodnight Koushiro. I love you.”

Koushiro mumbled something back and pressed himself closer to Yutaka. Their warm bodies snuggled close together.

Yutaka’s eyes eased shut. He draped an arm around the loving body in front of him. Whatever issues that may have been between the two of them had dissolved. The problems weren’t as important as each other were. And so with their world back to normal, sleep came to the two young men. And two rekindled souls were able to rest at ease

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Author's Note: Alright, two new chapters up. Outlines show that I have about five chapters left for this story. My other story has about five or six chapters left. Then A surprise! Plan to have all of it done by Halloween. So now having a deadline will hopefully give me the extra motivation I need to finish it all.
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- 11
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Stay Tuned As Life Continues For Others