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Facing the World Alone	By : Michikaru Category: +G to L > Hikaru no Go Views: 3947 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Hikaru no Go, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 10
- 11
Date posted:
June 11, 2007

Edited: Still looking for a
Beta

Chapter Warnings: Angst. Darkness.

Rated: R (must be an ADULT to read)

Disclaimer: I do not own copyrights to Hikaru no Go. I also do not make a
profit from this. My only payment is my own satisfaction and reviews. :P

Facing
the World Alone

By: Mira Watanabe

:: Chapter Eleven ::

Finding Someone that wasn�t There

Shin reached up and took Karasu�s
hand. It was an unspoken agreement between the two, but also an agreement Shin
made with himself to try and move on from his borrowed memories of Sai. It was
also his agreement to walk away from love and find some other way of living,
but this did not mean that he was going to stop selling his body. Prostitution is
how he made a living. It was all he knew what to do.

There was a compromise thought that
he had to make with himself. That was to finish school. It was a good thing
that this year was his last, and the first semester was just about up. There
wasn�t much left that he could do for his past self.

It was time for Shin to give up on
Hikaru and Sai.

Shin looked up into blue eyes,
wondering if he had the strength to let go of that last string, that last
thread the connected himself to his past. But the eyes said nothing to him.
They were just filled with warmth, but it was that warmth that gave him
strength. They gave him to courage to start on a road to a different path.

They gave him love.

Shin prayed that he could find the
courage to give that back. It was an empty prayer though, for he was born
without a heart. Hikaru made it so.

But� he could try.

Shin squeezed Karasu�s hand. He
could certainly try. He pulled Karasu towards him, planting a delicate kiss
upon his lips.

�he could try�.

-()()()-

That day at Matsumoto High School
was like any other. Funny that everything should be so normal after the death of their History teacher. There was gossip
now about the new replacement teacher and happy sighs of losing the substitute,
Yashi-sensei.

What was odd though, was the blushes
upon the general youth�s face, the passionate chattering of swooning girls, and
even the blushing faces of the regular staff was seen everywhere.

It was like the entire school was
love struck.

Shin sat in his English class,
pondering the world around him. He was getting odd looks from the class around
him, but nothing unusual. This was the worst he had ever looked though.

Thank GOD for black and the chill of
winter. Shin had uses those things for reason to hid the most of his bandages.
With the added trench coat, borrowed from his new� friend, he had completely covered the bandages around his arms.
Seeing that all he owned were short sleeved shirts, he was grateful for the
added covering.

There was also the
added baggy pants. Granted, they were also borrowed, due to the fact
that all he had was skintight Levies and pleather,
and due to the fact that most of his clothes were full of blood and other
things�

�Shin made a note to himself to
catch back up with his laundry�

And due to the fact that tight pants
where the last thing he needed, Shin
was left borrowing Karasu�s pants as well. Though, he had fought long and hard to get not only the
clothes, but the ability to go to school with his injuries.

Karasu was no pleased that he was
going to leave anyway. Permission or not.

�OH my GOOOD! Did you see him?!� Miss Priss �whispered� to her
friend.

�OH Yes~!� her friend moaned back
happy, �Isn�t he just gorgeous?!�

Both girls squealed loudly.

Shin dropped his head onto the desk
with a thunk, covering his head for added effect.

�Oh my god! I saw him last class. What a hunk!�
a third person added.

Shin looked up. What was up with
girls and their limited vocabulary and high pitched voice?

The three girls squealed again.

Shin covered his face again with a
heartfelt groan. ��I hate women��

The English teacher shushed them up,
and class began.

-()()()-

The rest of the day was much the
same. Each class talking about the new history professor.
Every girl squealing happily, even some boys where blushing about the new
teach. It was maddening, so much so, that Shin was not able to get in as much
sleep as he used to during classes.

With the lack of sleep and the added
noise about the new teacher was really starting to aggravate his nerves and
piss him off.

By the beginning of his last class,
Shin was debating skipping and going home for some much needed rest.� He was currently walking down the hall
without disruption, though a few teachers sent him some disapproving looks. If
they had it their way, he would have been long gone by now.

Shin smirked.

There was something to say about
pissing off your teachers� It was extremely entertaining.

People moved out of his way and
watched him wearily. The trench coat was a good idea. It demanded respect from
those around him. It gave him a �Don�t mess with me� attitude. Though, the
message was clearly planted upon his face, the coat certainly added a big
message board with blinking lights to it.

He walked to his last class of the
day, six period History. The door was already propped
open and loud chattering was emanating from inside the class room. For once,
the class seemed to be having fun� So different from the
nervous lecturing from Yamada-sensei.

Giving up on thoughts of skipping
class, Shin walked through the door.

-()()()-

Walking through that door was like
walking into a dream. The world around him was suddenly fuzzy, and he had a
distinct feeling that he had entered a turning point to his life.

�I
can only show you the door, it is you who must decide to enter it�� wasn�t that how the saying goes?

The world literally stopped and Shin
found himself alone, on the brink of his existence. He
was not afraid. He had been alone since he was �born.� Since Hikaru left, he
has always been alone.

Then the world began to spin again,
taking him with it.

The world dipped and swirled in a
mass of colors. Vivid and birth colors that splashed against
his vision. They mixed into his life and painted all
the gray. Then they blurred.

Shin stumbled into the room, dizzy
from such an overwhelming experience. Obvious to the silence around him, he
leaned against the whiteboard for support. He felt the world tip, but then
there was a genital hand holding him. Pulling him back up.

He held that hand with both of his,
desperate not to fall down.

�Oi! Are you okay?!�

Shin looked up into a world full
violet-blue. Like a splash of ice cold water, everything was frozen, but the
fog stayed.

�Sai�

��Sai?� Darkness descended,
cushioned only by soft hands.

Some God must have a grudge against
him.

-()()()-

Shin woke up to a world of whiteness
and instantly knew he was at a hospital but did not know how he got there.
There was a study beat of the heart monitor by his side. A steady beat letting
him know he was still alive.

He hated it. He hated the fact that
he was still living. He hated it with passion.

Shin looked down to the IV and other
such needles in his skin. It had
happened again.

�Imagination
was a cruel bastard stuck on torturing me�

Shin sighed and whispered, �You
still haven�t left, ne Hikaru?� He looked up to the white ceiling, �You are
still here��

The heart monitor kept on beeping.

Shin looked at it, wishing for the
cold silence of that dreadful machine. That loud sound of silence� He wished
for death. Forget trying to live again, he prayed for Death to take him� But
death did not come for Death.

The heart monitor kept on beeping� then
a ghost entered the room, and for a brief second, Shin thought Death had really
come for him.

�Sai?� Shin whispers hoarsely, �Have you
come to take me home?�

Sai gave him a sad look, �Sorry, but
the doctor wishes for you to stay here a bit longer.� Sai rubbed his head
nervously, �Talk about a first day, ne?�

Shin gave him a confused look, �Am��
He paused, his throat drying out, �Am I dead, Sai?�

Purple hair fluttered as Sai threw
his head back laughing, �No! No, you are not dead. Though, by all accounts, you
should be.� Sai gave him a stern look, �With those types of wounds you should
have been to the hospital days ago! How you can even walk, is by all means a
miracle, in and of itself.�

Sai came to stand by Shin�s bed,
�Shindou-san, I do not know what is happening to you, and I will not stoop so
low as to assume I do know, but you are seriously injured.�

Shin looked away, �Don�t call me
that.�

Sai looked confused, �Huh?�

Black looked into blue, �My name is
Shin.�

�Shin, ne?� Sai chuckled, �Why?�

�Because Shindou is dead.�

Sai returned to his sad smile,
�Sometimes, at first, that is how it seems��

Shin glared at him.

Sai held out his hands, �Fine, fine,
Shin-san it is.� He muttered something about young kids these days, and shook his
head. �Anyway, we have tried to contact your parents, but it seems that the
number given did not work. You�ll have to get that updated when you get back to
class. The good part is your insurance still works, though it will expire on
your next birthday. Might want to get that check later.
It is never to go around without being insured��

Shin just looked at him.

�Uuuuh�. Yeah?� Sai looked back nervously.

�Who are you?�

Sai laughed, nerves taking hold
again, �Ah, my apologies. You fainted before I could introduce myself. Heh, talk about a first day. I am your new History teacher,
Fujiwara Sai. It is nice to meet you, Shin, though I wish the circumstance was
different.�

�Sai?� Shin looked more confused than
ever.

�

�Hey, that�s Fujiwara-sensei to
you.� Sai waved a finger in jest.

There were no odds to ends with
this. Bazaar, everything was so bazaar. The world was spinning again. Shin put
a hand to his head, noting that the gauze from earlier was still there. Then,
the world turned to fuzz.

�But,� Shin coughed, �Sai is dead��

Sai looked confuse, �I am not dead,
Shin� and I am very much alive��

Black met blue, but something was
not there, �No�� Shin shook his head desperately, �N-NOO! You are not SAI!�

Chapter One End: To Be Continued

Annoying Authors Notes:

Wow� So that
is it for now. I just had to stop, that Sai was starting to freak me out. I
mean, he is a teacher, but what is he doing acting all goody-goody at a
hospital? That was defiantly not the Sai I had envisioned. Too OOC even for me.

Well,
there you have it. Sai is back� a little nutty, but back. (n.n);;

The
chapter went a little too fast, and I felt that Sai was introduced too soon,
but what the heck, it�s the 11^th chapter. At least it happened the
way I wanted, though I had not planned for Shin to be in the hospital by the
end of their meeting; the nurses� office, yes, but not the hospital.

That is
not surprising though, I marked up how much abuse Shin�s body took, putting
into account the lost of feeling, and was like� �Well, if Shin did faint like
that, it must have been due to blood loss, and like any concerned teacher, they
would have noticed that the boy needed to go to the hospital.�

So what is
going to happen next?

Now if
only I can move Sai away from being OOC� Well, what do you think Sai would do
in this situation?

This is
the end of �Finding Someone that wasn�t There.�

Thank you for waiting so long!

I make my
living off of reviews. They make me happy. A happy me
makes more chapters. It is just the way of things.

Also,
pointless criticisms (�FLAMES�) are not appreciated.

(o.0);; Sooo� As
always�

P L E A S E

R E V I E W
- 10
- 11
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Facing the World Alone