Come What May

Disclaimer: I do not own Gravitation nor do I make any money from using the characters. I am a part owner of Kyosuke, though.

NC-17

If you have time, please review. Thank you!!


Woot, made you wait didn’t I? Terribly sorry. I also, found myself forced to wait, unable to write for the past month. Stupid holidays!

This chapter was easier than the last chapter, but still a trial due to time constraints and my own thoughts that possibly this story has ‘jumped the shark’ as it were. Come What May is rapidly nearing an end. I still have many ideas for another arc, with lots of angst and lots of cliché tearing apart and putting everything back together. There’s a threesome dying for attention and I suppose I’ll have to take on the scary pair of Tatsuha and Ryuichi, not to mention the tour in general. So I guess I'll keep at it for a while longer, until you tire of me.

I can never say it enough, thank you so much, Kri*Kri and Ashcat!

Also, I can never say it enough how much I truly appreciate all your reviews, especially after that last, very difficult chapter. Thank you so much, you really do keep me going.


Have a Happy New Year, everyone.


Come What May


Chapter 14
Bed of Nails


I can walk the bed of nails
I'm not the only one
But some, they cannot walk the jagged line
Callous, concentrating
For nails are sharp as lies
I run the jagged line

From years and years of practice
I know just how to stand
Alone with perfect balance, hand in hand
Prepared with boards and hammers
And several bags of nails
I could build a wall to lean on
Roof above my mind
I can see you've got your own plans
Please don't drive your nails into this heart of mine


**************************************

I stood on a mountaintop, mere inches from the pinnacle. Wind and snow roared by my ears, yet it made no sound. I could hear a soft, soothing voice in the background of my mind, one who made agendas and took initiative, one who stood one-step above. I felt hobbled and ineffective, knowing I should be responding to the voice. No, I should not be responding to the voice, I should be the voice. I should be the one giving commands. I should be the one directing, planning lives, raising up the ones who deserved to rise and smiting those who warranted censure.

Me. I was the one who made the decisions and no one else could take that from me; and if, by some unforeseen happenstance, my great power lessened, I would topple from this treacherous mountaintop I considered my throne, my home. In the resulting descent, I would be nothing but a mangled and shattered body as I struck the jagged rocks so far removed from me.

I expected nothing less.

And yet, I was not ready to succumb to the fall. I would not give up my supremacy. I would fight on to regain the footing I had lost, take the step up again so that the wind and snow would again heed only me and I would once again make the world dance to my tune, as I always had.

“Tohma,” the soothing voice of the goddess said. “Sit up now, and drink this.”

“Daddy?” a worried child’s voice said to me and I felt a tug on my arm. “Mommy says you need to sit up now.”

I opened my eyes to see two sets of worried expressions regarding me. Mika’s sharp blue eyes relaxed when I finally shook off the nightmare I had been experiencing and began to move. “How long?” I embarrassingly squeaked out.

She smiled, “Only a day. So far Sakano has covered for you and no one even knows you are not still in Tokyo.”

Good. I was relieved to realize the voice I heard in my dream was hers. She was a goddess indeed.

“Are you going to be okay, daddy?” Umi-chan said with concern as she wrung her hands.

“You worry too much, Umi-chan,” I answered as reached out and squeezed her hands, stilling her unconscious movements. “With a little time and medicine, I’ll be fine. But you must continue to help your mother until I’m well again, okay?”

“Okay,” she smiled at me, but the worry remained in her eyes.

“Go play now, darling,” Mika said to our eldest child. “I’ll call you if I need help.”

She nodded and then sprinted from the room.

“She has been very concerned for you,” my wife said softly. “Do you need help sitting up?”

“No,” I answered as I pushed myself up, causing my head to spin. Mika placed some of our numerous fluffy pillows behind my back and smoothed back my sweat-drenched hair. Then she eased herself gently down next to me so she would not jar me. She handed me two pills and a glass of water. Once I consumed those, she handed me a spoonful of some noxious tasting liquid that was supposed to lessen the pain in my chest.

Trying not to make a face from the taste of the horrible elixir, I asked, “News?”

As she replaced the cap on the medicine she said, “The lost has been found, but there is a slight hitch.”

I coughed a little. “Hitch?”

She nodded. “It involves Maiko.”

“Maiko?” I said with confusion.

Smiling she said, “Now I know you’re sick. You didn’t call her Maiko-san.”

“What’s the issue?” I managed to whisper.

“Her boyfriend has turned out to be something of a cad. He has… abused her physically. And then Eiri…” She shrugged and smiled. “Well, you know how Eiri responds to that kind of thing.”

“Hmm,” I wondered how much I needed to accomplish in order to correct this ‘hitch’.

Mika frowned at me and said sternly, “Oh, no you don’t, you are not getting out of this bed. Noriko did not drive you all the way from Tokyo only to have you work yourself to death at home. Besides, Kyosuke’s dealing with it.”

“Kyosuke?”

“Yes. Amusingly enough, Eiri called him for help.”

“Well, I suppose that’s understandable as he was very agitated with me.” I nodded. “And Kyosuke will probably have connections as good as mine, possibly better to negotiate this issue.”

“All in the family, eh, my love?”

“Of course. There are few people in this world I trust enough to do a good job. Kyosuke is one.” I looked into her lovely, bright eyes. “You are the other. I love you, my goddess.”

“You are sick,” she chuckled. “The doctor says you should feel better by tonight, but you cannot rush things.”

My eyelids felt heavy and I situated myself, with Mika’s assistance, so I was more comfortable, laying back and sinking luxuriously into the numerous handmade silk pillows of gold and indigo I used to prop myself up with. Mika covered me gently with the matching quilt and leaned over to kiss me on my forehead.

“Rest now, Tohma. You’ll be running the world again in no time.”

“If only that were true,” I smiled as I allowed sleep to envelop me.

Twenty-four hours later, I felt well enough to move to the office in my Kyoto home so I could check on any pressing business. I called Sakano first to check on any possible reporting concerning my somewhat volatile brother-in-law. NG’s second in command gave me a succinct report on what he knew regarding Eiri and Miyamoto Daisuke, including Eiri’s broken hand and Maiko’s injuries. He also informed me that no one could find any trace of Miyamoto; it was as if the man had vanished into thin air.

Hmm. Apparently, my cousin had been hard at work.

Sakano went on to assure me that all was quiet at NG and that he had informed the staff I was taking a short break with my family before the upcoming tour. It was a very plausible scenario and I duly commended him on his thoughtfulness. He stammered as he thanked me, explaining that he had learned from the best.

Next, I contacted Kyosuke.

“You know,” he said, ignoring the customary “hello” as he answered the phone, “I’ve been racking my enormous brain and I don’t think I’ve ever known you to be sick.”

“It is rare,” I admitted. “But I’m afraid it does happen.”

“Pity you cannot blacklist the insolent germ that caused Seguchi Tohma to fall ill,” he laughed softly.

“Kyosuke,” I said patiently with a smile on my lips, “you are a tease.”

“Huh. Don’t remind me,” he sighed.

“Oh, my. Don’t tell me there is trouble in paradise?” It was my turn to tease.

There was an extended pause before he answered quietly, “There is, I’m afraid, but now is not the time to trouble you with my love life. You’ve called to inquire about Miyamoto Daisuke, haven’t you?”

“I have,” I stated as I furrowed my brows. What could be bothering him? Kyosuke was adept at negotiations so I was certain he could maneuver through the uncharted depths of a public threesome. Or could he? Not for the first time, I considered that in the past, personal relationships for Kyosuke had tended to be very superficial; he had relied on his good looks and charming personality to get him what he wanted, with little regard for the other person or, in many cases, people, involved.

He was also capable of breaking up with his lovers in a disarming way that left his former partners still quite enamored of him. A fine thing when he was a freewheeling bachelor, but a possible disaster for him at this juncture in his life. Apparently, Nakano disliked friendly, former lovers arriving on Kyosuke’s doorstep.

What would happen when the thick veneer that protected Inoue Kyosuke from heartache was stripped away, leaving him completely vulnerable to the effects of love? The next few months might prove to be very challenging for him, especially when the rigors and stress of an extended tour added to his already complicated relationship. I expected nothing less than success from Kyosuke, and yet, the particularly wicked side of me anticipated watching what quick steps my nimble-minded cousin would need to take as the relationship began to fray, as all relationships must, once the honeymoon ended.

“Tohma?” the concern in Kyosuke’s voice was clear.

“Yes?” I answered as I came back to the here and now abruptly.

“I asked if you heard me, but I know you didn’t,” he chuckled. “I’m fairly sure you should not be out of bed yet.”

“I apologize, Kyosuke. I must admit I am not at my best,” I sat back in the chair. “Might I impose on you to repeat what you just told me?”

“Sure, but can you hold on for a moment?”

“Of course,” I answered. In the next few moments, I could hear a soft-spoken Suguru in the background informing Kyosuke that he had not yet located Nakano.

Hmm. Nakano, was it?

“Sorry, Tohma,” he sighed. “So here’s the deal – Miyamoto Daisuke has been given an ‘offer’ to relocate.”

Offer. Relocate.

“Was there any medical attention involved with this offer?”

“Well, a bit. But it was a pre-existing condition and not part of our very professional offer,” he answered defensively. “We would not be so amateurish.”

I smiled at his outrage. “My apologies.”

“It seems that before we made the offer, he was a victim of a brutal drubbing by some surly, moody sociopath with a nasty left hook. The poor guy had a broken jaw, a shattered eye socket, and several broken ribs when we found him,” my cousin added softly.

“I see,” I swallowed. Apparently, Eiri had been in a quite a foul mood when he had stumbled on Miyamoto. A shattered eye socket? I resisted the queasiness as I thought about it. “No police are investigating?”

“We immediately saw to his medical treatment by a very discreet doctor, but, strangely enough, Miyamoto had no memory of how his injuries had occurred. Upon further investigation, we found several people attesting to a night of drunken debauchery at a very… unsavory karaoke bar.”

“Hmm, curious, isn’t it?” I leaned my elbow on my desk and rested my cheek on my upraised hand.

“Very. The guy has issues with alcohol, I’d say.”

“Amongst other things,” I replied as I leaned back and crossed my legs. “And if I may ask, what was the offer?”

“Korea.”

“He’s going to Korea?” I heard Suguru in the background mimic my words and my surprise.

“Yes,” Kyosuke answered, a razor sharp, no nonsense edge to his voice. “It is not a horrible offer, but I should not expect him to return to Japan in the next five years.”

Five years? I cleared my throat. “When does he leave?”

“He’s already left Japan. My people will have his belongings sent to him.”

“Well done, Kyosuke,” I sighed. “You have taken care of a cumbersome issue for me.”

“Not at all, I am quite fond of Maiko.” And then I swear I could hear the smile, “I think she always wanted Shu to pick me instead of Yuki.”

In the background, I heard an uncharacteristic rant from Suguru and then the slamming of a door.

Kyosuke sighed.

Hmm.

“Kyosuke, may I ask you a question?” I said softly.

“Go ahead, Tohma, please, feel free to counsel me. We both know you want to,” he said with resignation. “Besides, if I must be honest, I’m about to tear out my lovely, beautiful hair in frustration.”

“Do you feel you’ve made a mistake?” I rested my elbow on the desk again and waited.

“What? No, of course not!”

I remained silent.

He sighed again, this time in surrender. “Okay, sometimes, I have to admit I do feel as if I am in over my head. It can get unbelievably complicated, Tohma.”

I laughed quietly, marveling at how humble my normally capricious, self-confident cousin sounded. “I must tell you that what you are experiencing is nothing out of the ordinary and yes, by all means, relationships can be overwhelming, Kyosuke. On a daily basis, I have the capability to make or break people, but I have never faced anything quite as daunting or as important as my relationship with Mika-san is. Two must be exponentially difficult.”

“Oh my, I must sound terrible,” he said with forced light-heartedness. “I believe you are trying to comfort me.”

Shaking my head I replied, “Not at all, I am merely stating facts. Do you feel your relationship is worth it?”

“What?” he asked and, in my mind’s eye, I could see his emerald-colored eyes blink at me in confusion.

“Is it worth it? Are you having more good times than bad?”

“Well… yeah.”

Nodding to the phone I said, “Then what else is there? The Inoue Kyosuke I know wouldn’t need any additional reassurance. I am confident the three of you will find your way.”

I heard him light a cigarette and inhale deeply. “Maybe. But this is… it’s all about trust.”

“Ah, a very difficult concept,” I leaned back in the chair again. “I assume the issue is their trust in you? You don’t have the most promising track record so I can understand the difficulty.”

He laughed hollowly, “Yes, if you ask Hiroshi, I cannot to be trusted in the least. He has some very deep issues concerning trust, almost insurmountable, at the moment.”

Almost insurmountable from Nakano? I sat up straight and modulated my voice to neutral, “Kyosuke, please try to keep in context the difficult year that Nakano-san has been through.”

“Yes, Tohma, believe me, no one is more aware of the damage Hiroshi has taken than me,” he chided. And then he continued in a more sullen tone of voice, “But this is different. He’s almost frantic with jealously. I’m beginning to fear that being with me is too much for him. Suguru helps to anchor him, but I think there is something really wrong with him.”

“Wrong? What do you mean?”

“Sometimes he’s so extreme, he’s hard for us to handle.”

Kyosuke’s worried tone set off warning bells in my head. At this point in our ill-fated tour, we did not need anyone else to fall ill. “Kyosuke, how extreme is his behavior? He is not exhibiting actions similar to Ryuichi-san is he?”

“No, nothing that bad, not by any means,” he answered quickly. “But he does seem a little… off from time to time.”

I chewed on my lip. “What does Suguru-san have to say concerning Nakano-san’s actions?”

“Suguru says he’s never seen Hiroshi so emotional. But he also feels it is Hiroshi’s reaction to being in love after such a bad year. Suguru seems to think he’s very frightened.”

Sighing with relief, I felt myself relax with his words. “Good. I feel that explanation very plausible and, if I were you, I would trust Suguru-san’s grounded opinion. He knows Nakano-san possibly better than anyone does and he is very analytical and not given to flights of fancy no matter how emotionally involved he is.”

I heard my cousin groan.

“Ah,” I smiled. “I take it this is the other part of the trust equation.”

“Yeah, if you ask Suguru, I have issues with trusting other people.”

“Hmm, very complicated. Do you?”

“I don’t think it’s about trust,” he reasoned. “I think it’s about being alone and self-reliant for a large part of my life.”

“Really?” I leaned back once again and stretched out my legs. “Do you ever keep things from them? Not in an attempt to hide things, of course, but maybe because you feel you are protecting them?”

He made a dismissive noise and then said, “You’re one to talk. You keep things from people all the time!”

“Not from Mika-san,” I corrected.

“You know,” he snarled. “I don’t think I want to talk to you anymore.”

I chuckled as I answered, “Don’t worry, Kyosuke, I know you’ll find your way. But you will need to learn to trust them as well as prove yourself trustworthy. It doesn’t happen overnight, so be patient with them and remind them to be patient with you.”

“Yeah, yeah,” he grumbled. “Are you done now?”

“Almost, but I do have one more thing I must ask of you,” I added quickly.

“Hmm?” I could hear the curiosity return to his voice.

“I need someone to check on Tatsuha-san. Mika-san is worried about him,” it was my turn to sigh. Who knew what Ryuichi was doing with Mika’s hapless, naive brother?

“I would be as well, if I were her,” he muttered. “Sakuma is not the most stable of individuals.”

“This is true,” I nodded my agreement. “But he is acting a bit out of character of late as well.”

“How can you tell?” he asked seriously.

“He usually checks in with me regularly, but I have not heard from him in several weeks.”

“Hmm. Sure, I’ll check on him.”

I heard him light another cigarette. He was chain-smoking, which hinted that he was a little on the tense side.

He exhaled and said, “I’ll take Hiroshi with me since he understands Sakuma more than I do.”

“You should not exclude Suguru-san. His observations might prove to be very enlightening,” I explained. “And your request for help might go a long way towards bringing him closer to you.”

“But, Suguru doesn’t need that kind of, oh… right,” he chuckled. “Right. Yeah, I’ll ask him.”

“Good. Call me when you have some news. We are all flying in next week, I’ll let you know when the details are set.”

“We’ll be ready.” As an afterthought he said, “Oh, and thanks for the advice, Tohma. I have to admit I do feel a little better now.”

As I hung up, a smile remained on my face. So, Kyosuke was getting everything he ever wanted, wasn’t he? I was immensely proud of my cousin and I knew, when he gained a bit more experience and his new life began to be more comfortable to him, he would be excellent relationship material.

“Tohma?” Mika called softly. “You need to go to back to bed now.”

I nodded in agreement. “I am feeling a bit fatigued.”

She smiled sweetly at me as she touched my forehead, checking for fever. Then, she took my hand and I followed her obediently back to our luxurious bed.

“You need to feel better for tomorrow,” she said sternly as we entered the bedroom. “We are having visitors.”

“Visitors?” I furrowed my brow as she pulled back the quilt and helped me get into bed and situated. I was unhappy with this turn of events; I disliked strangers seeing me when I was ill.

“Yes,” she answered as she smoothed the blankets over me and then sat down next to me. “But don’t worry. They don’t even know you are here.”

Raising an eyebrow, I watched my wife closely as I replied, “Eiri-san and Shuichi-san?”

“Yes,” she smiled brightly. “And Maiko.”

“How did you manage that?” I smiled in return.

“It was easy,” she shrugged. “I asked Maiko if she wanted to come and visit, you know, in order to get away from Tokyo.”

“Ah, you are very clever,” I nodded. “How could either Shuichi-san or Eiri-san deny her anything at the moment?”

“Exactly!” The smile quickly melted from her features. “I also wanted Shuichi to come meet our children, it’s way past time. I feel like a heel that we’ve never invited him before now.”

I squeezed her hand. I felt bad, too. “But what of your father? Won’t he…”

“So,” she cut me off, “this time we won’t invite my father.”

I knew it was difficult for her, having to choose between family members, but perhaps there would come a day when it would not be necessary.

Sitting up, I caressed her cheek. “Have I told you how much I love you?”

“Yes,” she griped my hand with hers and then kissed it. “Go to sleep. You need to be strong enough to deal with Shuichi’s energy and Eiri’s anger.”

Laughing, I said, “I’m anticipating their surprise.”

“I bet you are,” she laughed and then stood to leave. “Good night, my love.”

I snuggled in, surrendering to my illness, comforted in the knowledge that the right people were in charge of all things that mattered.


I was feeling better the next day and, as I sat in my office working, I heard the doorbell. I assumed it was Eiri, Shuichi, and Maiko. I had already convinced Mika to allow me to be the one to answer the door. My life had held few moments of joy of late, so my wife, understanding my need for… amusement, had agreed to my request.

Our Kyoto home was large and sprawling, filled with antiques and fine art from all over the world. It was much like my office in Tokyo, but a warmer due to Mika’s influence. Each room had its own theme, and the two of us had spent a great deal of time and money making the house perfect.

However, getting from my office to the front door was a lengthily walk, and I was not in top condition. So, by the time I neared the door, the person on the other side wasn’t knocking so much as pounding.

Hmm. The pounding seemed to confirm my assumption of Eiri’s presence.

As I reached for the doorknob, I heard, “For fuck’s sake, Mika, open the door! It’s pouring out here.”

“Eiri-san,” I said as I swung the door inward with a smile. “Please try and watch your language. There are impressionable children about.”

“What the hell are you doing here?” he snarled at me.

I glanced at his hand, bandages wrapped tightly around it as he attempted to keep it out of the rain. It was just as Sakano had reported to me.

“Eiri!” Shuichi shouted from the car, trying to make himself heard over the pounding rainstorm. “What’s wrong? We need to get inside!”

Eiri turned and yelled in return. “No, stay in the car! We’re leaving!”

“Are you fucking insane?” He shouted back, alerting the whole of my neighborhood to his presence.

“I said stay in the car!”

I could see Shuichi get out of the car carrying… oh no. He ran to the front door, shielding his head from the rain, stopping only when he reached Eiri’s side.

“What the hell are you saying? Did we just drive four hours to turn around and…” his line of sight shifted from Eiri to me. “What the hell are you doing here?”

In the carrier, the cat flattened its ears and glared at me. My smile lessened only a fraction as I glared back. I would put up with the cat’s insolent behavior in Shuichi’s house, but my own home was a different matter altogether. I heard a deep, fierce rumble coming from the small creature’s chest, gaining volume as it focused on me, the two of us locked in our staring contest.

“Tohma,” Mika said with amusement behind me as she touched my arm, “move aside and let them in, darling.”

I turned, a question on my lips, but all I had to do was look into her smiling eyes to realize the cat was part of the plan.

“Come in, Maiko,” she held out her hand. “I am certain that you, at least, have enough sense to come in out of the rain.”

Maiko? I hadn’t even noticed her presence, but there she was, with her eye a lovely shade of yellowish-green and her arm in a sling as Mika guided her from behind Eiri and out of the downpour.

“Shuichi?” Mika relieved him of the cat carrier and set it down inside the opened door as his eyes jumped from Eiri to me to Mika and back to Eiri again. “How much luggage do you have? Can the driver manage it all?”

“Ye… yeah. I think so,” he stammered as he looked around furtively.

“Then get inside,” she demanded.

He looked uncertainly at the scowling Eiri, ready to join in whatever decision he made.

“Eiri,” Mika fixed her brother with a stern glare. “Don’t be troublesome. Umi-chan is very excited to meet Shuichi, do not disappoint… everyone.”

At Mika’s utterance of ‘everyone’, Eiri glanced surreptitiously at his boyfriend and finally simply sighed in surrender and moved inside the doorway.

I took in Mika’s triumphant countenance and finally began to understand how skillfully she had manipulated us all. As we followed the grumbling Eiri, the shell-shocked Shuichi, the delighted Maiko, and the howling cat, I took her hand and lovingly squeezed it, attempting to convey how immensely proud I was that she was my wife.


Shuichi and Eiri spent most of the day trying to avoid me. I worked a bit and checked in with Kyosuke, who seemed to be in somewhat better spirits. He had located Nakano and the three had made up. I quietly hoped they had not made up in public, but, with Kyosuke, one could never be sure. I assumed I would hear about it if the three had made a spectacle of themselves.

Again.

When Mika came to check on me, I asked her how our guests were doing.

“Fine. Umi-chan is completely smitten with Shuichi, as I knew she would be.” She placed her hand on my forehead lovingly, checking for fever. “And he seems to be quite fond of her as well. Eiri, strangely enough, also seems to have a weak spot for her.”

“How could they possibly resist her? Our eldest child is very gregarious.”

She smiled at me as she handed me my medication and some water. “She is. Maiko, on the other hand, seems to only have eyes for the baby.”

“What about the cat?” I asked, and the question came out much harsher than I meant it to.

Mika laughed, melting my anger about the cat all over again.

“The cat is an endless source of delight for Tsukiko-chan.”

“Tsukiko-chan?” I said with surprise, I wasn’t thrilled about the cat being around my two-year-old daughter. “You aren’t letting that beast get close to the children are you?”

“More like the ‘beast’ can’t escape them,” she smiled again. “There have been a few incidents of claws on skin, but that hasn’t dissuaded Tsukiko-chan. Umi-chan has a bit more respect for the creature, but our youngest daughter is quite taken with the cat.”

I stifled my internal groan, as I realized that, once the tour was over, we would have a cat. That is, if Shuichi’s nasty animal didn’t take up permanent residency in my home.

“Don’t worry, my love,” she soothed me. “The house is big enough for you and the cat.”

“I’m not certain of that, but I will try,” I took a long look at her and her attire. “Are you going out?”

“Yes,” she nodded. “I’ve managed to talk Eiri into visiting father.”

I didn’t bother trying to hide my surprise at Eiri’s acquiescence to Mika’s demand.

“I know, I’m also surprised he agreed,” she said as she answered my unasked question. “He said he needed to clear the air about Shuichi.”

“Yes, he may have some feelings he feels necessary to express to your father,” I said quietly.

“That’s what I’m afraid of. I suspect we will have a short visit,” she sighed. “I’ll take the children with us. Maybe that will help keep the two in line.”

“I wouldn’t count on it,” I said softly as I considered the upcoming conversation between Eiri and his father was long overdue.

Personally, I didn’t have any particularly negative feelings for the elder Uesugi, but I wasn’t overly fond of him either. The man had vehemently disliked me in the beginning and he had gone out of his way to make my relationship with Mika very difficult.

But his treatment of me was mild in comparison to his complete ostracization of Shuichi. And, through it all, the biting insults and total disdain that the man relentlessly heaped onto Shuichi, Eiri had remained coldly and cruelly distant, choosing to ignore the emotional thrashing his lover endured in order to be “part of the family.”

I shook my head with the memory. Those few ‘family’ get-togethers with Shuichi in attendance had been painful to be a part of and I could not remember those times without feeling the shame at my own reluctance to get involved. Mika and I had both felt it was important for Eiri to make the stand for his boyfriend, but he hadn’t. Eventually and predictably, the older man got his wish and Shuichi quit attending family events.

I wasn’t even certain Eiri noticed Shuichi’s absence at the time. But now I had the feeling Eiri was determined to make up for past transgressions and let his father know just how important Shuichi was to him.

“Come on, Tohma,” she smiled at me but the worry lines were still evident. “It’s time for you to play host.”

I stood up and the two of us walked to the living room together. We had a more formal, Western style sitting room with fine furniture and expensive rugs, but it was beautiful and cold, a masterpiece of home furnishings and not a place to actually sit. It was more a work of art to look at and appraise with the eyes alone.

Our living room was where we… lived, for lack of a better term. Situated next to the kitchen, it was a comfortable and sprawling room, filled with several comfortable chairs, and couches, low tables covered with games, books, magazines, and a plethora of children’s toys. A mixture of Western and Japanese, it was absolute chaos and, strangely enough, probably my favorite room in the house.

As we walked in, we found Shuichi and Umi-chan playing a video game, Eiri sitting on the couch watching the two, and Maiko sitting on the floor playing with our son, Chikara-chan. In the corner, little Tsukiko-chan sat jabbering to the cat who lurked under the chair, just out of my daughter’s reach.

“Maiko, would you like to go with us?” Mika asked.

Eiri looked up and upon seeing me, his eyes narrowed, he turned to Maiko and said, “I think you should stay here.”

Maiko tipped her head at Eiri, her blooming curiosity evident. “He can’t be that bad, Eiri. Even if he was mean to Shuichi…”

“No,” Eiri snapped. “Stay here.” He glanced at me and then to Shuichi.

“What…” she began.

Ah. So Eiri wasn’t comfortable with the idea of Shuichi and me alone. I tried to hide my smile as I glanced at my wife. Mika was smiling, too.

“He thinks Tohma and I are going to get it on if you leave us alone,” Shuichi answered absently as he twisted his body in reaction to what was happening in the game.

“Yay!” Umi-chan suddenly cheered as she jumped on Shuichi. “That monster was mean, but you got him!”

“What?!” Maiko looked from the back of Shuichi’s head to Eiri to me. “What?!”

Mika rolled her eyes before saying, “Don’t worry about it, Maiko, they are just being boys. Would you like to join us?”

Maiko laughed at the explanation as Mika picked up the squirming Chikara. “No, I think I’ll stay here, if you don’t mind.”

“Not at all. Come on Umi-chan, Tsukiko-chan, we are going to see grandfather.”

“Chikara-chan, too, right?” Umi asked.

“Yes, he’s going, too.”

“What?” Eiri grumbled. “All of them?”

“Yes, Eiri,” Mika said patiently. “You won’t have to do much, so don’t worry.”

“Huh,” was his skeptical answer.

I chuckled as I followed my family to the car and helped pack them all in safely.

Once I returned to the living room, I found Shuichi sitting in a chair, waiting for me. Maiko was conspicuously absent.

“It must be time for us to talk,” I smiled at him.

He nodded.

“How is Eiri-san taking it?” I asked as I sat down on the end of the couch so I could face him.

Exhaling, he answered, “Better. He’s still mad at you, although I’m not sure why he would be mad at you and not me. I’m the one who… well, I’m the one he should blame. I’m sorry, Tohma.”

I blinked at him. “Why are you sorry?”

“For doing that… for trying to… you know,” he shifted his gaze and fidgeted.

“For attempting to use me?”

He nodded again.

Leaning back, I smiled. “Far be it from me to begrudge anyone an attempted power play, Shuichi-san. Please be assured, it’s all water under the bridge at this point.”

“If you say so,” he answered, but he was clearly unconvinced of my sincerity as he nervously shifted in the chair. His fingers twitched before he continued, “So, now I have another problem.”

I placed my elbow on the arm of the couch and set my chin on my upraised hand. “Let’s hear it.”

“Eiri wants to go with us,” he said quickly.

“Does he? Well, I’m not surprised,” I answered calmly. “I suspected he might. Especially now that he is injured and cannot write or sign autographs.”

“But that’s the problem, Tohma! What happens when he gets bored or tired of traveling? We both know he doesn’t travel well – why would he do this?”

“Shuichi-san,” I said, my puzzlement obvious, “why would this be a problem for you? He wants to be with you, I remember a time when you would have moved heaven and earth to get him to come with you on tour. Now you are hesitant, why?”

He rolled his eyes, “How can you say that? Kyo, Hiro, Ryuichi, you. There’s four reasons right there.”

“I see. So you think it’s only because Eiri-san is jealous and wants to keep an eye on you?”

“Yeah… I know he doesn’t trust me and I can understand that, but being on tour might really be a strain on our relationship,” he said with a sigh.

Raising an eyebrow, I said, “And being apart wouldn’t?”

He groaned in frustration, “I don’t know!”

“Have you discussed it with the therapist?” I asked carefully.

“Not yet. We have another appointment the day after tomorrow. And then, I’m seeing a therapist by myself.”

“Are you?” I smiled. “That’s good, Shuichi-san.”

“We’ll see,” he fidgeted again.

“I believe you worry too much. You and Eiri-san are reforming and remaking your deep attachment; he wants to be with you Shuichi-san, he’s reaching out and trying to be a better partner for you. You need to believe that and you need to let him try to be a part of your music life.”

“It’s hard, Tohma. He never cared before.” He sat back. “I’m confused.”

Laughing I said, “Eiri-san does have the tendency to confuse people, but never fear, he wouldn’t offer to go if he did not want to.”

“It’s not so much of an offer as a demand. But even so,” he sighed and his eyes locked on mine before he said, “I’m like you, I never can say ‘no’ to him.”

“Do not distress yourself,” I reassured him, ignoring his not-so-subtle barb. “If he wants to go home during the middle of the tour, we’ll send him home.”

“Yeah. I guess,” he said absently.

After several minutes of silence, I said carefully, “Shuichi-san, I must ask, what of Tatsuha-san?”

I watched him bristle at the name and the anger turned his eyes almost black. “I don’t want to discuss him.”

“We must,” I replied patiently. “Ryuichi-san is not going to give him up, so Tatsuha will be there and will be interacting with all of us. You cannot pretend that he won’t be there, and you cannot avoid the eventual confrontation.”

“Why not?” he snarled at me. “Why the hell not? Wouldn’t ignoring him be better than beating him to a pulp?”

“Shuichi-san…”

“NO!” he spat as he got to his feet. “No forgiveness for that bastard! Not ever!”

“But what of Eiri-san, would you deny him his only brother?”

“That’s not my problem, Tohma,” he shook his head and then looked pointedly at me. “I’ve been separated from his family for most of our relationship, and I have to admit, it seems to work out better that way.”

“Shuichi-san…”

“Now, if you don’t mind, I’m going for a walk,” he announced as he turned to leave the room.

“Shindou-san, I have not dismissed you yet, you will sit down and hear me out,” my words were sharp, but not loud.

His steps faltered and he stopped, turning to meet my hardened gaze. His eyes flickered for only a fraction of a second, but it was enough for me to realize that there was still a little fear left in him for me to work with. Ah, good, for a moment, I worried I had been too easy on him of late.

He moved back to the chair and flopped into it, glaring at me.

Sitting up straight, I said, “I am speaking to you know as the president of NG Records, not as family.”

“Family?” he sputtered. “Oh, please…”

“This is a grim situation, but you will find a way to be civil during this tour, Shindou-san,” I announced clearly. “Your relationship with everyone will matter as we will be in constant contact with one another. This tour will be grueling and I will not tolerate any temper tantrums on your part, regardless of how deserving Tatsuha-san might be of your wrath.”

“But…”

“No excuses, Shindou-san,” I held his stubborn stare. “You will find a way. I am not saying you must forgive him – how could I? And I’m not saying that you must spend time with him, but you must discover a way to establish a polite demeanor with him, for everyone’s sake.”

He chewed on his lip as he glared at me.

What I didn’t say was that I was worried about Ryuichi’s reaction to Shuichi’s potential snubbing of Tatsuha. I had too little information on Ryuichi and Tatsuha’s relationship to know the possible repercussions, but if Ryuichi was as attached to Tatsuha as I suspected he was… he might take Shuichi’s actions personally.

Finally, I leaned back. “Don’t worry, Shuichi-san, I know you’ll puzzle it out.”

“Are you done now?” he said tightly.

Shaking my head, I answered, “No. Maiko-san said you had lyrics for the latest song Kyosuke, Suguru-san, and Nakano-san wrote.”

The glare in his eyes dimmed for a moment as he nodded. Music always did get to him.

“I would like to hear it. Would you sing it for me in my studio?”

He tried to stay angry, but the sparkle in his eyes gave him away. So I pulled out the final stop. “Eiri-san mentioned he liked it as well.”

“Really?” he said with open exuberance.

“Well, what he actually said was something less clear, but I understood his meaning,” I smiled. “He is not easy to impress. Will you sing it for me now?”

“Yeah… okay,” he attempted to sound reluctant.

We both stood as I asked, “Do you have a name for the song?”

“Death with a Heartbeat,” he said with a grin as he headed for the studio.

“Good name,” I answered as I followed him.

The song turned out to be a wonderful surprise in spite of my forewarning with Eiri’s uncharacteristic approval. Kyosuke and his troop had created an extraordinary song and, while I had been doubtful of adding lyrics to it, Shuichi’s words brought the song to full fruition. It was full of barely-contained kinetic energy, longing to be set loose. It was the type of song you knew would knock people over and grab their attention.

It was one in a million.

There was so much emotion in the music itself, the threesome’s complicated and loving melody, clearly inspired by their woven adoration for one another, and Shuichi’s lyrics of breaking through pain to emerge on better days was magic.

When he finished, I found myself to be speechless. Well, nearly speechless.

“Bravo, Shuichi-san,” I smiled as the wheels began to turn in my head. “Very well done. I believe we should leave the song as a live performance only and then, later on, record it in the studio.”

He smiled knowingly as he scratched absently at his stomach. “I thought you might say that. I agree, I think it’s going to be one of ‘those’ songs. I did record a version of it when I was in Tokyo, but it wasn’t nearly as good as this one.”

“I’ll make sure to have that recording destroyed,” I made a mental note to call Sakano as soon as I had a moment.

“I think that would be best,” he agreed as he scratched again.

I nodded and added, “Is your piercing bothering you?”

“What?” he blinked at me.

“Your navel piercing,” I answered. “Is it bothering you? I’ve been watching you worrying at it.”

“Yeah… how did you know about it?” he shook his head. “Never mind, of course you know. You always know.”

“What’s wrong with it? Have you been taking care of it?”

“Yes, mother,” he said quietly. “But Eiri usually puts oil on it, and he can’t really do that right now. He’s pathetic with his right hand.”

“Why don’t you do it?” I asked the obvious question.

Shrugging, he replied, “Strangely enough, it makes me kind of queasy. My nipple ring didn’t do that, but for some reason, this one really bothers me.”

“I could apply the oil for you,” I offered.

He looked at me suspiciously.

Laughing, I explained, “Really, Shuichi-san, who do you think looked after all of Ryuichi-san’s piercings?”

“You did that?” he gazed at me with surprise. “But he has some that are in spots that are … well, intimate!”

“I’m well aware of that,” I answered. “He was quite a baby about all of them. I never could figure out why he insisted on getting them.”

He stared at me, his violet eyes soft and full of knowing, “Maybe he wanted the attention from you.”

“Maybe,” I stared back, surprised once again by Shuichi’s ability to read the situation clearly. I smiled, “Where’s your oil? It’s not petroleum based, correct?”

“Of course not,” he snorted derisively at me. “It’s lavender oil.”

“Here,” Maiko said at my elbow as she handed me bottle. I had forgotten she was in the room with us, she must have retrieved the oil as Shuichi and I spoke. “I can’t do it for him either because it kind of makes me sick.”

“Take off your shirt,” I commanded as I knelt before him with the bottle and some gauze in hand for any excess oil.

Some moments in life were inevitable, as if there were karmic sequences of events and impossible to avoid. Of course, one of those moments occurred as I was on my knees in front of half-naked Shuichi, placing lavender oil on his navel piercing and Eiri walked into the room.

I was grateful Eiri’s left hand was broken as Shuichi and Maiko managed to intervene before my angry and ferociously jealous brother-in-law was able to injure me seriously with his less effective right hand.

The addition of Eiri to our entourage left me in no doubt that the European tour would be all the more chaotic. The dynamics of three bands touring together was complicated in and of itself. But adding a libidinous threesome and two volatile relationships into the amalgamation and we could have complete mayhem.

As I rubbed at my bruised neck, I found that was I very much looking forward to it.


The next day went smooth comparatively and Shuichi generously offered to make a dinner of gyoza for all of us. As I sat in the living room, I listened as Eiri, of course, felt the need to supervise.

"Did you get as much of the water out as you could?" Eiri asked.

"Yes, Eiri," Shuichi replied patiently as he tossed the drained, chopped shitake mushrooms into a bowl. "I have done this before, you know.”

"I know," Eiri answered quietly. "It's just hard for me to get used to."

Maiko giggled, "I think Mirai-san just about gave up being a chef while she was trying to teach him."

"How many times did you burn her kitchen down in the process of learning?" Eiri needled.

Shuichi glared at his boyfriend before he began chopping scallions with angry, lightening fast strokes.

"Didn't you manage to catch the floor on fire?" Maiko laughed outright this time.

“Maiko!” Shuichi complained at his sister.

"How the hell do you catch the floor on fire?" Eiri smirked. And then he smiled. I was stunned and pleased to see that amazing and very rare sight. I was relieved to see he was actually happy again.

“Eiri,” Mika spoke up, “I wouldn’t be so smug about Shuichi’s learning curve when it comes to cooking. I believe you had a few mishaps of your own.”

Shuichi paused his movements as he looked at Eiri pointedly before saying, “Is that so? And here you told me you were a natural at cooking.”

“I said no such thing,” Eiri snarled.

“The conversation was something like this:” Shuichi modulated his voice to sound like a little girl version of himself, “Oh, Eiri, you’re such a good cook, you must be a natural!”

Eiri glared and replied, “And what did I say?”

“The answer was ‘Ngh,’ as I recall.”

“So how does that translate to ‘I’m a natural’?” Eiri challenged.

“That sound means yes from you and you know it!” Shuichi argued as he returned to his work.

“No,” Eiri shook his head. “It means; I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Whatever,” Shuichi answered dismissively.

“So,” Maiko said, breaking up the argument with a smile, “what were some of Eiri’s mishaps in the kitchen?”

“Mika…” Eiri said warningly.

Ignoring him, Mika smiled brightly at Maiko and said, “The Pocky omelet was the best.”

Shuichi’s movements stilled as he looked up at Eiri in surprise.

Eiri looked away, feigning boredom.

Mika leaned on the counter and met Shuichi’s eyes as she said, “Well, one day when Eiri was very hungry, he experimented. He knew how to make omelets but for some strange reason he decided Pocky would be a great addition to the eggs.”

“Oh no…” Maiko laughed.

“Oh yes,” Mika answered.

“You didn’t eat it did you?” Shuichi asked in horror, his eyes wide.

“When father found out about it, he did force Eiri eat part of it as a lesson to him,” Mika started to laugh in earnest.

Grumbling Eiri said, “He always was a sadistic bastard.”

“Language, Eiri!” Mika scolded and then continued with a chuckle, “Besides, it you deserved it since it was my Pocky to begin with. I still can’t believe you stole out of my sock drawer!”

“Why should I waste my own candy when I knew where yours was?” Eiri asked with complete sincerity.

He had a point, I thought.

“Pocky omelet. Gross,” Shuichi made a face in spite of his clear amusement. After a moment he asked, “By the way, it didn’t happen to be strawberry Pocky, did it?”

“It was,” Eiri grimaced.

“That explains a few things,” Shuichi said absently.

“So,” Maiko continued as she looked expectantly at Eiri, “how was the Strawberry pocky omelet?”

“How do you think?” he snarled in reply.

There was a slight pause before the whole of the room erupted with laughter. Shuichi attempted to hide his joy, but he was unsuccessful.

“Before that incident, strawberry Pocky used to be his favorite treat,” Mika could barely get the words out she was laughing so hard. Only her brothers could get her to laugh with such uncharacteristic abandon.

Eiri ignored all the laughter and finally said in his own defense, “I was only ten, what did you expect?”

“Oh, but there were others…” Mika said through her happy tears. “The burned fish, the miso soup disasters and the exploding rice cooker.”

“Exploding rice cooker?” Shuichi almost shouted with his glee.

“Never mind,” Eiri cut Shuichi off sharply in the way that told everyone he would not tolerate being the butt of the jokes any longer.

But all he accomplished with his outrage was to make everyone laugh harder.

The night continued that way as we ate and drank, all of us happy and in a rare, relaxed state. After a satisfying dinner, we all settled down to watch a movie.

I fell asleep only moments into the movie. My lovely goddess woke me at the film’s end and, as I blinked my eyes, I realized I was not the only one to have fallen asleep. Next to me in the chair, curled into a tight ball, was the cat. I had to admit he was somewhat cute when he was asleep and not out to draw blood. I briefly wondered if he felt the same about me.

I shifted him gently and stood up, looking over to the couch to find Shuichi and Eiri slumbering together soundly in a complicated tangle of limbs. Mika tried to wake them as well, but Eiri grumbled and swatted at her and then tightened his hold on his lover.

Mika shook her head and shrugged, “It’s your back that’s in jeopardy, not mine.”

The two of us made our way to our bedroom and, once there, we changed for sleep. As we did so, Mika gently dropped a new problem on me.

“Maiko asked me about Chikara today.”

“Did she?” I asked cautiously.

“Yes,” Mika’s eyes delved into mine. “She asked me if Eiri knew about him.”

I sighed.

“It gets worse,” she continued as she got into bed. “She said it was Shuichi that mentioned it to her. Apparently, Shuichi is not completely ignorant of the fact that carrying a baby takes nine months.”

“So…?” I prompted.

“He remembers that I wasn’t pregnant when I should have been. I think Maiko was trying to warn me.”

“Hmm,” I pondered. “We were very careful, but Shuichi-san can be more observant than I give him credit for sometimes. Additionally, he is quite fond of you so he would have taken note of any changes in your condition. I wonder when he could have seen you.”

Shaking her head she answered, “I can’t figure it out. I was so careful.”

I got into bed and took her hand reassuringly, “I know you were, Mika-san. It is possible it will never come up again, you know. Shuichi-san can be… discreet.”

And yet I had to consider that if Maiko and Shuichi had suspicions about the birth of Chikara, I was certain a few others in the outside world did as well. If the full truth ever came out, I wondered how Tatsuha would react, since he was as much in the dark over the child as anyone else. And how would Ryuichi take it? I was certain that I did not want to find out.

I looked at my wife, the concern in her eyes was apparent. I smoothed back her hair, “Don’t worry, my love. Nothing can change the fact that Chikara-chan is our son.”

“Yes he is, isn’t he?” she answered with a smile and she hugged me.

As we snuggled into bed together, I realized I would need to be as nimble and quick thinking in the coming days as I had counseled my love struck cousin about earlier.

But I was confident in my abilities to handle any difficulties.

Come what may.


TBC


Lyrics for Bed of Nails by Bob Mould (Husker Du) Ah, Bob Mould – responsible for one-third of my hearing loss during a Sugar concert.


And hey, Kibou32, if you ever figure out what bugged you about chapter... whatever it was - please let me know. To be honest, I didn't like that chapter much either. I appreciate your candor and I always want to get better! Thank you.