The Price I Pay Yuki/Shuuichi
folder
Gravitation › General
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
14
Views:
4,207
Reviews:
5
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
Gravitation › General
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
14
Views:
4,207
Reviews:
5
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
I do not own Gravitation, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
14
The Price I Pay Yuki/Shu
Ch. 15
Saa sakura no ki, mou sukoshi dake yo
Hikari de hanabira e kagayaku no
Ichido miretai -
(Saa, cherry blossom tree, just a little more!
I want to see your petals shining in the light
one more time.)
Gurasu haato de ore no koi ga
Yume no naka sae ni terashiteru -
Tsumetai yoru ni samayottara
Yami ni kare mo nai nara mayottara.
Naze yume ga owaru no kana?
(My love with his glass heart
is lit up even inside my dreams -
I roam around in the cold night
and if he isn't there in the darkness
I am lost.
Why do dreams end?)
Saa, sakura no ki, mou sukoshi dake da!
Kira-kira no hanabira e fuiteru kaze wo
Ichido fureru no hoshii -
(Saa, cherry blossom tree, just a little more!
I want to touch/feel the wind blowing through your shiny petals -)
Garasu haato de ore no koi no
Kakko ii kao mo, kakko ii koe mo
Zenbu shiritai kara yume no naka sae ni
Jikan ga mijikakisugite ze!
(My love with his glass heart's
cool face and cool voice -
I want to know everything about him
But even in dreams time is too short.)
Oikakerou to shite oboeru hanabira ga
Taiyou no shita de utsukushiku odotta -
Nee, onegai! Sakura no ki, mankai saite yo!
(The petals that I remember trying to chase
danced beautifully beneath the sun -
Hey, please! Bloom fully, cherry blossom tree!)
-
Shuichi gazed out the window as he finished writing the last verse. His amethyst eyes glistened. There was so much to do, that he wanted, yet....
Life was too cruel at times. Too harsh. He wished he could turn back the hands on the clock and by doing so turn back time. There were so many things he'd have done differently - there were just as much that he'd be afraid to change.
He averted his gaze from the sun shining overhead and instead studied the floor. He sighed.
'It's useless, even if time did run backwards it'd be pointless if it means I'd never have met Yuki...' Shuichi shut his eyes, squeezing out a few tears.
The drops slid down his cheeks to his chin. After realizing that the only wish that could've prevented his catching the virus was one that stopped him from falling for Yuki, Shuichi could no longer wish for time to move back.
'The only thing I have left is to try and make the best of things.' He lifted his face and wiped his eyes, his blurry vision slowly becoming clear.
He still felt sick when taking his medication and now there were even more pills he needed to take. On top of that, he had a weekly appointment scheduled to check his T-cell count and such.
"Shuichi, have you finished the lyrics for the new song?" Hiro asked as he entered the room, guitar in hand. His red hair was pulled in a ponytail behind his shoulders, and his eyes were struggling to be happy along with his lips. The sight of his best-friend's face, the puffy eyes and glistening cheeks, made it hard to feign a smile. Even though that was what his friend needed.
"...." Shuichi noticed Hiro's discomfort and smiled wistfully. "I'm sorry, Hiro. I'm not that depressed, not like before. Yuki and I are talking more now, and we're making plans for a trip. It'll be scheduled for before Bad Luck's next album so it's possible I'll have plenty of ideas for songs when I get back."
"I'm relieved....that day after our last concert and the press conference...." Hiro sighed, remembering how sick and miserable Shuichi was after talking to the reporters. It had taken all the pink-haired singer had to get through the press conference without showing how sick he felt. Hiro had ended up carrying Shuichi back to their dressing-room.
"I'm okay. I've just been wondering how much longer....people can survive longer with AIDS now than even a few years ago. I...." Shuichi gazed back outside the window, the sun now partly covered with clouds. "I just wonder if only my brother could've survived a few more years there would've been better medicines, better chances...."
"Shuichi...."
"I am sad, but....I don't regret meeting Yuki. Or falling in love...." Shuichi picked up the lyrics sheet and turned back to Hiro. "I only regret that my brother never experienced these same feelings. That I wasn't able to help him more. That...." Shuichi sighed. "We were only half-brothers but....he was there my whole life and...."
Hiro hugged Shuichi mid-sentence, realizing that his friend was simply trying to appear strong. He didn't say anything as a surprized Shuichi embraced him back and started crying.
"I'm sorry, Hiro. I'm....I try, but I just can't...." Shuichi's amethyst eyes shined with tears as he stared at the floor. His head supported by his friend's shoulder. "I don't want to see Yuki sad or upset, so I try to avoid breaking down in front of him. But that means I cry in front of you instead...."
"It's okay, Shuichi." Hiro whispered, holding his friend tighter. "It's okay."
0
Yuki stood frozen just outside the door. Having heard the late few sentences of Hiro and Shuichi's conversation, he felt himself unable to move. His chest and eyes felt heavy, and his energy depleted.
'Shuichi.' He sighed in his thoughts and turned away from the door, unable to face his lover at that moment. Though it was the same feeling he had, not wanting to let his lover see him cry, it hurt him somehow. Like a stinger stabbed into his heart, the fact that his lover felt unable to be completely himself around Yuki, tore into the author.
With a mental sigh, Yuki walked away from the door and down the hall. His gait slow and face nearly expressionless.
-
A/N: The poem at the beginning is my original, and since I'm completely self-taught in Japanese, there are probably grammar mistakes.
Ch. 15
Saa sakura no ki, mou sukoshi dake yo
Hikari de hanabira e kagayaku no
Ichido miretai -
(Saa, cherry blossom tree, just a little more!
I want to see your petals shining in the light
one more time.)
Gurasu haato de ore no koi ga
Yume no naka sae ni terashiteru -
Tsumetai yoru ni samayottara
Yami ni kare mo nai nara mayottara.
Naze yume ga owaru no kana?
(My love with his glass heart
is lit up even inside my dreams -
I roam around in the cold night
and if he isn't there in the darkness
I am lost.
Why do dreams end?)
Saa, sakura no ki, mou sukoshi dake da!
Kira-kira no hanabira e fuiteru kaze wo
Ichido fureru no hoshii -
(Saa, cherry blossom tree, just a little more!
I want to touch/feel the wind blowing through your shiny petals -)
Garasu haato de ore no koi no
Kakko ii kao mo, kakko ii koe mo
Zenbu shiritai kara yume no naka sae ni
Jikan ga mijikakisugite ze!
(My love with his glass heart's
cool face and cool voice -
I want to know everything about him
But even in dreams time is too short.)
Oikakerou to shite oboeru hanabira ga
Taiyou no shita de utsukushiku odotta -
Nee, onegai! Sakura no ki, mankai saite yo!
(The petals that I remember trying to chase
danced beautifully beneath the sun -
Hey, please! Bloom fully, cherry blossom tree!)
-
Shuichi gazed out the window as he finished writing the last verse. His amethyst eyes glistened. There was so much to do, that he wanted, yet....
Life was too cruel at times. Too harsh. He wished he could turn back the hands on the clock and by doing so turn back time. There were so many things he'd have done differently - there were just as much that he'd be afraid to change.
He averted his gaze from the sun shining overhead and instead studied the floor. He sighed.
'It's useless, even if time did run backwards it'd be pointless if it means I'd never have met Yuki...' Shuichi shut his eyes, squeezing out a few tears.
The drops slid down his cheeks to his chin. After realizing that the only wish that could've prevented his catching the virus was one that stopped him from falling for Yuki, Shuichi could no longer wish for time to move back.
'The only thing I have left is to try and make the best of things.' He lifted his face and wiped his eyes, his blurry vision slowly becoming clear.
He still felt sick when taking his medication and now there were even more pills he needed to take. On top of that, he had a weekly appointment scheduled to check his T-cell count and such.
"Shuichi, have you finished the lyrics for the new song?" Hiro asked as he entered the room, guitar in hand. His red hair was pulled in a ponytail behind his shoulders, and his eyes were struggling to be happy along with his lips. The sight of his best-friend's face, the puffy eyes and glistening cheeks, made it hard to feign a smile. Even though that was what his friend needed.
"...." Shuichi noticed Hiro's discomfort and smiled wistfully. "I'm sorry, Hiro. I'm not that depressed, not like before. Yuki and I are talking more now, and we're making plans for a trip. It'll be scheduled for before Bad Luck's next album so it's possible I'll have plenty of ideas for songs when I get back."
"I'm relieved....that day after our last concert and the press conference...." Hiro sighed, remembering how sick and miserable Shuichi was after talking to the reporters. It had taken all the pink-haired singer had to get through the press conference without showing how sick he felt. Hiro had ended up carrying Shuichi back to their dressing-room.
"I'm okay. I've just been wondering how much longer....people can survive longer with AIDS now than even a few years ago. I...." Shuichi gazed back outside the window, the sun now partly covered with clouds. "I just wonder if only my brother could've survived a few more years there would've been better medicines, better chances...."
"Shuichi...."
"I am sad, but....I don't regret meeting Yuki. Or falling in love...." Shuichi picked up the lyrics sheet and turned back to Hiro. "I only regret that my brother never experienced these same feelings. That I wasn't able to help him more. That...." Shuichi sighed. "We were only half-brothers but....he was there my whole life and...."
Hiro hugged Shuichi mid-sentence, realizing that his friend was simply trying to appear strong. He didn't say anything as a surprized Shuichi embraced him back and started crying.
"I'm sorry, Hiro. I'm....I try, but I just can't...." Shuichi's amethyst eyes shined with tears as he stared at the floor. His head supported by his friend's shoulder. "I don't want to see Yuki sad or upset, so I try to avoid breaking down in front of him. But that means I cry in front of you instead...."
"It's okay, Shuichi." Hiro whispered, holding his friend tighter. "It's okay."
0
Yuki stood frozen just outside the door. Having heard the late few sentences of Hiro and Shuichi's conversation, he felt himself unable to move. His chest and eyes felt heavy, and his energy depleted.
'Shuichi.' He sighed in his thoughts and turned away from the door, unable to face his lover at that moment. Though it was the same feeling he had, not wanting to let his lover see him cry, it hurt him somehow. Like a stinger stabbed into his heart, the fact that his lover felt unable to be completely himself around Yuki, tore into the author.
With a mental sigh, Yuki walked away from the door and down the hall. His gait slow and face nearly expressionless.
-
A/N: The poem at the beginning is my original, and since I'm completely self-taught in Japanese, there are probably grammar mistakes.