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The Time For Change Is Now	By : Reika Category: +. to F > FAKE Views: 3033 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own FAKE, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 14
- 15
- 16
Disclaimer: Mine? NO!
A/N: I�m sorry for the lateness of this chapter. I went to work on Tuesday and the hamster just�died. Too much crack, I suppose. But I got a new one�so it�s all good now.
I�ve been meaning to thank Liegenschonheit and Dementia-12 for archiving me. I�ve never been archived before�it makes me all tingly. THANK YOU. *throws kisses*
Thanks to Jasmine, for getting sucked into being my beta on this fic too�even though she never planned on it.
Ryo isn�t in this chapter as much as I had planned. The other stuff just was way too long to keep going, and I wanted to get this posted. But the next chapter is very much Ryo centric, I promise. It�ll be here soon.
I had one reviewer ask for the pairinwhahwhahaha. I think not, little one. If I told you, I�d have to tell everyone. Has it been revealed, you ask. No way in hell. You�ll just have to keep reading�I suppose. (Please please please keep reading *begs*).

Thank you and on with the next chapter!
Chapter 15��When there is nothing left but us.

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The door had closed softly�unfitting for the dramatics that had taken place just moments before.
Ryo stood quietly for a moment, letting it sink in. After it had�he still didn�t know how he felt or what to do. He was elated that he didn�t have to leave�but JJ�s parting words had both infuriated him and made him wonder. Who did he think he was? How could he presume to know Ryo�s feeling toward Dee and its merit? He knew what love was � he�d been surrounded by it. He knew how it felt to love someone�but�he realized, that the love he�d shown his aunt and Bikky and countless other people that were important to him was�different. But how?
He wasn�t so na�ve as to harbor the assumption thatwoulwould be the same. You have to love *everyone* a different way. But he�d never felt this�burning�in his chest. Was that love, of the romantic sort? Was that passion? Both emotions were fairly foreign to him. What did this mean?
Did it mean that now he and Dee would be together forever, hand in hand like in some modern independent film exploring the �new age family�? Did it mean that he was supposed to resign his life to Dee�s? The relationship was complicated�they were both men�and things were infinitely more difficult since not one, but *both* partners were emotionally stunted in some way. With a woman it was different�the commitment, the solidity, came with marriage�and Ryo didn�t think he wanted to be �married�. How was he supposed to know the extent of their relationship when society gave him no guidelines to follow?
He wondered what would have come of him without Dee. He knew what he was�he�d always known it. But he didn�t think he would have the courage to charge headfirst into acceptance without someone like Dee to help him. He was going to need some time to get used to it. It occurred to him then, how odd and almost sad it was that a human would have to *get used* to something they *were*. It just didn�t seem natural � having to adjust to being what he *was*. He wondered about JJ. He didn�t know the man very well, but he could tell that JJ made no excuses for being gay. A part of him almost wished that he could talk to him; ask him questions. He noted absently that using the �g� word was so much easier whe app applied to someone else.
He knew that he would risk his life for Dee. But part of him wondered if that was something that came from their professional relationship. Even before all these romantic twists and turns, he would have done the same. Dee was his partner, and now�he couldn�t think of *any* words in the English language that could describe what it was they were to each other.
Ryo was extremely domestic, for a man. But he was still a man. He still wasn�t certain about the concept of settling down�for life. All the tension and butterflies that assaulted his senses when Dee touched him sent chills up his spine�it was incredibly exciting. But he wondered � would all that just fade away after he gave in to him? Gay or not�a relationship was a relationship. He wondered if it was Dee he loved�or the *idea* of Dee. Once the charming lion caught his gazelle�all that would be left was�a man. What would Dee be like when he had nothing to chase?
Ryo had to think about it. He knew Dee, of course, but through all the time that he�d become familiar with him there had been an underlying tension � distorting everything else. Dee was a kind man, if not an extremely patient one. He was honest and raw � gritty in a way that Ryo had never had the courage to be. He was stubborn as a mule � but Ryo realized that the same tenacity that drove him crazy had always been something he�d respected about his partner. Once Dee decided something was right, no one, not even God, could sway him. Although it could be an irritating quality, it was also an admirable one.
It had been a big enough step to admit to wanting Dee�and now love was in the equation. He knew it had always been there, but now it seemed urgent; as though he had to �beat� JJ; as though Dee was going to stand them in a line and determine lov loved him more. Ryo had never liked being pushed. He liked things at a slow, natural pace. He felt that pushing something devalued it; but he had to realize � what does the value of something matter if you lose it in the end?
Ryo hated when he got philosophical. He always had a tendency for it and once his mind started asking questions, it never stopped or found any answers. He loved Dee. Period. He didn�t know how, or why, or if they would be together always � but he *knew* it.
Bikky chose that moment to come sauntering into the room and Ryo wished he�d come earlier to prevent his internal monologue.
�Ryo?�
�Yes?� Ryo absently picked up his mug and took a sip, but immediately spit it out when the now cool tea hit his palette.
�So we�re not leaving?�
Ryo sighed. �No�it looks like we�re not. And do you listen to *all* my conversations?�
Bikky didn�t answer the question. He rushed forward, hugging Ryo around his chest. He�d been quite the trooper, taking the move with uncharacteristic grace; but Ryo could see now how very bothered he had been by The The door opened with a creak and Carol stepped into the room, a grocery bag in her hand.
�What�s going on you guys?�
Bikky ripped away from Ryo and rushed the poor girl, knocking her over and sending soup cans rolling this way and that.
�Cal! I�m not leavin�! We get to stay!�
Carol laughed and hugged Bikky back before pushing him away and standing, righting her now rumpled clothing. �How�d that happen?�
Bikky composed himself as well. �That jerk off from the hospital came bre are and told Ryo that he was gonna go instead.� He immediately whipped around, turning his attention to his foster father. �Yeah�and I heard those things he said to you! I heard him talkin� about spending the night with Dee! How could you let him do that Ryo?�
Ryo rubbed his temples. Bikky was always so involved in things that didn�t really concern him. He figured he shouldn�t mince words, since the teen had already heard the conversation. �Bikky�JJ didn�t have to come over here. He could have just let us leave. Sure, he wasn�t very nice about it�but he gave Dee up to me.�
Bikky snorted, grasping Carol�s hand and tugging at her, signaling that they were about to head back into his bedroom. �Ryo�that guy didn�t *give* Dee to you�he was always yours.�
The kids made their way down the hall and Bikky�s words reverberated through Ryo�s mind. He found an odd and simple truth to them�and it made him smile. Possession had never been something Ryo favored�but he was finding that it felt pretty good � to have someone completely.
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JJ checked for Dee�s car before heading up to his apartment. He was glad that apparently his house guest had decided to stay. He felt horrible, the stress of the day bringing his fever back to life. He inserted his key into the lock, but found the door open. He stepped inside, removing his coat and immediately shoving the papers in his hand into a drawer before looking into the bedroom.
Dee was propped up against the pillows, remote in hand, muttering something about police shows being �a load of crap.� JJ chuckled and then immediately pushed it down, not allowing himself to appreciate the warm feeling that coming �home� to Dee elicited in him. Dee heard him, and turned his head. He smiled and switched off the TV before getting up off the bed and crossing the room.
He had his shirt on now; the top three buttons undone, and it hung loose and untucked at his waist. His hair was messy and wild, forming a shaggy black curtain over his eyes since he hadn�t taken the time to tame it as he did for work. JJ found him incredibly appealing like this � with no pretences or masks left to wear. He smiled brightly at him before his fever protested to all the movement he�d been doing and he reeled, almost falling over.
Dee flew over to him, catching him around the waist and maneuvering him to sit on the bed. �Whoa, JJ�just�just sit down, alright?� He placed the back of his hand against the sniper�s cheeks. After he was satisfied, he pulled it back and frowned, though the concern pushed its way through his scowl. �I thought you said you were feeling better. You�re burning up.�
�Yeah� JJ started �I just had a rough day.�
Dee remained frowning for a moment before he reached forward, pulling JJ�s tie loose and slipping it over his head. Afterwards, he started on his shirt, deftly undoing the buttons. The action didn�t seem seductive at all, more caring and deliberate. JJ looked up at him, confused.
�Dee Sempai�what are you doing?�
Dee smiled, though he didn�t look at him or cease his task. �Your fever feels pretty damn high. I�ll bet these are uncomfortable.� He finished with JJ�s work shirt and then slipped his fingers into the undershirt, pulling it over the sniper�s head. JJ realized that the cool air hitting his skin did feel good. Dee smiled again at the look of relief on his face and stepped back.
�I�ll let you take care of the rest. I�m gonna go run a cool bath, okay? That should help.�
JJ nodded as Dee slipped into the bathroom. When the rest of his clothes were divested, he slipped his bathrobe on and followed. Dee took notice of him and offered him a lazy smile.
�Check this temperature�I know it needs to be cool, budon�don�t want to freeze you to death.�
JJ stuck his hand into the water and pulled it back, satisfied. He opened up the cabinets underneath the sink and pulled out a light green bottle. Walking over to the water, he squeezed it and let the liquid drift down, making bubbles.
�The bubbles are a bit annoying, but it�s got menthol in it; good for colds.�
�Ah� Dee said before plucking the bottle from his fingers. �This is for babies, isn�t it?�
�Yeah, but it works.�
Dee let out a quiet �hmm� and leaned forward, kissing JJ on the forehead. Afterwards, he froze, realizing he hadn�t really meant to do it�it just seemed natural. Shaking away the surprise, he smiled and turned off the water. �You just relax. I�ll�go get you some Tylenol.�
Dee exited the bathroom and JJ disrobed, slipping down into the semi-temperate water. He sighed heavily and tried to focus on the smell of the menthol, or the cool water on his skin � anything but the knowledge that this would be last time he would be with Dee for a long time�possibly forever.
While Dee was in the kitchen, he poured a glass of water and set it aside before opening the cabinet where JJ kept his pills. Reaching for the Tylenol bottle, his eyes met the bottle he�d questioned JJ over days earlier. Eskalith�lithium. Dee remembered his conversation with JJ and finding out that he was bipolar. He didn�t know much about the illness, but knew that being manic depressive couldn�t be easy. All the drama recently must�ve been terribly bad for JJ. He made a mental note to learn more about the condition, as it would no doubt be a factor in his life as well now. He shook two painkillers into his palm and picked up the glass of water, headed back towards the bathroom.
JJ�s efforts were futile, and he found himself squeezing his eyes shut, willing away the tears. He pulled a hand up out of the water and raked it through his hair, gripping tightly. At that moment, the door opened again, but just a crack.
�Can I come in?�
�Yeah� JJ called, absently glancing down at the water where the bubbles covered his nakedness. Not that it really mattered. He had no intention of repeating the previous night � it had been perfect and he wanted to keep the memory that way, preserved and untainted.
Dee entered and couldn�t hold back a chuckle. Where JJ�s wet hand had been taken out of his otherwise dry hair, it left the area sticking up at odd angles. �Here� he said, handing JJ a glass of water and two red and yellow pills. The sniper downed them quickly.
�Listen�� Dee started ��you shouldn�t worry so much. It�s not good for you � you�ve literally worried yourself sick. Heh�you and Bikky both. I know things are kind of stressed, but everything�ll be alright.� He paused, then �Y�know�I always thought I wanted you to calm down, but I�m ready to see you all jumpy and happy again, okay?� He offered what he hoped was a reassuring smile.
The look on Dee�s face was enough to cause a new bout of tears, but JJ fought them back. He forced a smile and nodded. �Okay� he let out softly.
Dee stood, and turned back towards the door. �You�re in no shape to go out, and I can�t cook worth a damn, so I�ll just order something. Is that alright?�
�Sure� JJ replied. As Dee�s hand made contact with the doorknob, he called out, needing the other man�s presence near him. �Sempai�
Dee turned. �Hm?�
�Could you just�stay? Just�sit with me�please? We�ll worry about food later.�
Dee quirked a brow, but nodded. He squatted down beside the tub, resting back on his haunches. �Is everything all right?�
�Yeah�� JJ started ��I just want to look at you.�
Laughter filled the room, bouncing off the tile and resonating back over both men. �C�mon, JJ. I know I�m a stud�but seriously.�
JJ laughed and found his first easy smile of the day. �That you are Sempai�that you are. Will you hand me that sponge at your feet?�
Dee looked down at the sponge in question. His eyes glittered with mischief and he began rolling his sleeves up. If JJ noticed, he didn�t mention it. With his muscular forearms now bare, Dee picked up the sponge and dipped it into the water. JJ definitely noticed then. �Dee, what�re you phfffttt.�
Dee lifted it over JJ�s head and squeezed, pouring cool, minty water down over the silver hair and causing the smaller man to splutter as the water cascaded over his face. JJ lifted his hands and wiped at his eyes, blinking. �What was that for?�
The dry man shrugged. �Dunno�just seemed appropriate.�
JJ tried to scowl, but ended up looking amused. �Well as jarring as it was�it felt good.�
No words passed between them as Dee dipped the sponge back into the water and lifted it again, squeezing it this time over JJ�s shoulder. The smaller man whimpered a bit and tilted his head to the side. His skin was sensitive, due to fever, but it was subsiding and he found the coolness and the scratch of the sponge against his skin rather pleasing. He tilted his head forward, and Dee took the hint, repeating his action against the back of a pale neck.
So it stayed for quite some time. They were quiet; serene. JJ thought that if he lived to be a hundred he would never forget the feeling of being cared for so meticulously; the feeling of cool water on his skin and warm trust lulling him almost to sleep.
He was thankful again for the bubbles that he had so carelessly called an annoyance earlier. His arousal didn�t come from being touched, at least, not in the physical sense. It was a delightful sensation to have Dee�s strong hands on his shoulders and arms, yes, but JJ felt his touch deeper � blanketing the soul he didn�t think he had.
Overcome by the urge to thank Dee for reminding him of all the deliciously painful and spine-tingling emotions that accompanied humility, he twisted his head and kissed him. Dee stilled for a moment and pulled back, surprised, but just as quickly returned the chaste and achingly sweet kiss. When their lips were but millimeters away, JJ could have sworn he saw his own breath drawn from him and sucked into the mouth where he found both his salvation and his downfall.
It was short lived�like many things, JJ realized. Dee smiled at him and ruffled his wet hair, before standing and rolling down his sleeves. �Are you feeling any better?�
JJ nodded. �Quite a bit.�
�Okay then,� Dee started �we should probably figure out what to do for dinner before it gets too late. Is that Chinese place we always order from when working the late shift okay?�
�Yeah, that�s fine.�
�Alright�number 7, right?�
JJ found himself smiling again�so Dee did pay attention. �Yes�that�s right.�
Dee nodded and crossed his arms over his chest. JJ noted that it wasn�t a defensive stance, more one of masculinity and power; it suited him.
�You finish up in here, and I�ll take care of the food.�
Dee knew the number by heart, as he had always been the one to call when they were crammed into the office working all hours of the night. He sat on the edge of JJ�s bed, the cordless phone tucked underneath his ear and one leg propped up over the other. He rattled off JJ�s order, followed by his own, followed by Ryo�s. His eyes went wide and he mentally slapped himself, rescinding the last order placed. It had just come out of his mouth. It was what he�d always done, placing Ryo�s order behind his own. He knew it verbatim, down to all the little specific things Ryo liked.
Distractedly, he finished up on the phone, giving them the address. When he finished, he set the phone back into its cradle and his eyes automatically shifted to the picture. That damnable, damnable picture. He flipped it down again. It would have been easier to look at, had Ryo been scowling disapprovingly as he usually did. But no�he was smiling. It was the gentle, calm and caring smile that Dee had always loved so much. He missed him � missed that smile, and the smell of him, and even the way he would shove his masculine, yet delicate hand into Dee�s face, fending him off. Only days earlier, he had been ready to drop everything, do anything, if Ryo decided he wanted him. But now�his eyes wandered off to the bathroom door�would he be willing to give up this comfortable and new addition to his life? He wasn�t sure how things had changed so dramatically in such a short span of time�but had it really been that sudden? He�d gotten closer to JJ steadily over the last month or so, and although he�d known him for years, a part of him felt that, before that time, he hadn�t really known JJ at all.
He missed Ryo�he loved him. But�he loved JJ too. Until that moment, he hadn�t known it was possible to love two people at the same time�but there he was�and he was clueless as to what to do about it. After a while, he realized that such musings were impractical. Ryo wasn�t a factor anymore�despite Dee�s best efforts, Ryo didn�t want him�and probably never had.
JJ came out of the bathroom, his robe again wrapped around him snugly. He noticed the creases in Dee�s brow and soon after, noticed the flipped picture on his bedside table. He walked over to him slowly, until he stood between Dee�s now uncrossed legs. Reaching his hand towards the handsome face, he smoothed over the wrinkles in Dee�s brow with his thumbs.
�Now who�s wong tng too much?�
Dee sighed. �Sorry, I � �
�Hush� JJ commanded. �Go get some dishes ready for when the food gets here. I need to get dressed.�
�Maybe I should stay.� Dee wiggled his eyebrows suggestively.
�I�ll keep my virtue, thank you.�
�Virtue?!� Dee snorted. �Ha! I think mmmprhhhmm.�
JJ slapped his hand over Dee�s mouth. �Yeah, uh-huh, don�t finish that sentence�or else I may have to beat you.�
When JJ removed his hand, Dee couldn�t help but jump through the window the sniper�s comment had opened for him. �I thought taking beatings was *your* thing.�
JJ blushed to his ears before trying to compose himself. �It may very well be, but don�t think you�re above one.�
Dee stood, patting JJ�s head and leaving the room. He turned back, grinning. �Don�t worry�I�d never beat you while you�re sick�unless you want me to.�
JJ threw a pillow at the back of his head playfully, but Dee was too quick and it hit the back of the door instead. JJ was left alone in his room, taking deep breaths and trying to remind himself not to be so attached to Dee during his last night with him. He quickly dressed, just slipping on flannel pajama pants and a t-shirt before padding out to the kitchen. The table was set commonly, and Dee had just refilled both his own and JJ�s glass of water.
The rest of the evening went smoothly; dinner arrived and they ate while talking jovially. They discussed everything from politics to work to clothing. JJ realized that Dee was more scholarly than most people gave him credit for. Granted, he�d never win thousands of dollars on Jeopardy, but everyone had always just assumed that Dee�s intelligence was wrapped up in street smarts and instincts; and JJ found that far from true.
Soon they were back in the living room, sitting on the floor across from one another. Dee smoked like a chimney and JJ absently picked at the carpet while they continued conversing.
They talked about books, Dee preferring non-fiction, while JJ enjoyed more classical novels by the likes of socially satirical and honest writers like Oscar Wilde. Dee remembered having to read �The Picture Of Dorian Gray� in his high school years and had liked it enough, but found Wilde to be a bit disheartening in his view of life. This was something JJ, however, admired. JJ quoted him, his thoughts on crime, society.
�Starvation, not sin, is the parent of the modern crime. That indeed is the reason why our criminals are, as a class, so absolutely uninteresting from any psychological point of view. They are not marvelous Macbeths or terrible Vautrins. They are merely what ordinary, respectable, commonplace people would do if they had not got enough to eat."
Dee thought on it a moment, and found the quote to have quite a bit of merit. Crime meant something completely different when you were trying to stop it ead ead of performing or witnessing it. The new viewpoint made him think and see things from another perspective � he found it stimulating.
JJ laughed a bit. �It�s a great quote, from a great man�but he also said �There is only one thing worse than being talked about... and that is being set on fire by an enraged Pakistani��so we�ll never *really* know what went on in his head.�
Dee laughed out loud and smiled. When he calmed, he looked at the clock and realizing the late hour, stood after crushing out his cigarette. �It�s pretty late�I should head home.�
�No� JJ grabbed his arm. �Stay�please. I don�t want�I mean�we don�t need to�just�stay��
�I�ve been in these clothes for two days, JJ, and I don�t really think I can wake up early enough to go home and get new ones before work tomorrow. Besides�there�s no rush, you know.�
JJ kept his grip on Dee�s arm. �I�I know�but�just stay. You don�t have to go in tomorrow.�
Dee�s eyebrow quirked up and he sat down on the sofa. �Just how did you manage that?�
JJ hesitated, thinking of how to use his words so that he wouldn�t lie�but wouldn�t really tell the whole truth. �Rose owes me a favor�that�s all.�
Dee looked uncertain. �Rose is a bastard. I doubt that alone could get him to do *anything* for me.�
JJ had to think quickly. �I knew you needed a couple of days after all that�s happened, so I told him you were sick. Just in case he didn�t believe me, I told him I could always tell internal affairs about all the Ryo-chasing he does.�
Dee couldn�t help but laugh. �Damn�you know�I wish I�d thought of that. That asshole would do anything to get to Ryo.� Dee realized that, yet again, he�d brought up his former partner, most likely upsetting JJ. It was hard for him though � it had only been a short time and Ryo was still very much etched into his heart and mind. He quickly changed the subject. �Are you *positive* that I don�t have to go in tomorrow? I don�t need to go losing my job.�
JJ nodded. �Yeah�I�m sure. The chief might bitch about it, but it�s fine with Rose, and he has the final say so.�
The taller man relented, but remained suspicious. �Why do you want me to stay so badly?�
This part was easy, JJ thought. �Why wouldn�t I?�
After a moment, JJ stood and took Dee�s hand, pulling him to his feet as well. �We should go to bed though�it is pretty late.�
They entered the bedroom and Dee looked puzzled. He didn�t want to sleep in his pants�but had nothing on underneath them. He wasn�t sure what to do. JJ must�ve sensed this because he called over to him while rummaging through his closet.
�If you need something to sleep in, I have some pants that�ll probably fit you. My aunt actually sent me a birthday present about three years back. I don�t know who told her I was a six foot tall body builder�either that or she meant to send them to someone else. Here.� He tossed the pants at Dee. �They�ve never been worn. I�m not even sure why I kept them, really.�
It was a lie, but JJ hadn�t felt the need to express that he�d kept them because they were the only thing he�d received from his family (other than rent money) since leaving home at seventeen.
Dee thanked him and slipped into the bathroom to change. The soft pants were a little loose even on him, so he could just imagine JJ drowning in all the extra fabric. When he stepped back into the bedroom, JJ was already buried underneath the covers. Dee crawled in next to him and they laid there, face to face, both propped up on one elbow, talking for at least another hour.
JJ let out a great yawn, and Dee realized that he was sleepy as well. They got into more comfortable positions and JJ tentatively snuggled up to Dee, curling into his side and resting his head atop his chest. His fingers drew lazy circles on the flesh there, and Dee chuckled at the slightly ticklish sensation.
�I love you, Dee.� JJ hadn�t really meant to say it�but it had been swelling in him and he couldn�t leave without letting it out.
�You know�� Dee took a moment, thinking of his words. ��I think�no�I�I lo��
JJ twisted around at lightning speed, slamming his hand down over Dee�s mouth. �Don�t say it�please. Let�s just�go to sleep, okay?�
Dee nodded, with JJ�s hand still on his lips. He was surprised and suspicious�but figured that it could wait until morning. JJ settled back down and in minutes they both drifted off to sleep.
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TBC
Okay.
I know I said Ryo got to fume in this chapter�well�I lied. This ended up waaay longer than I had intended�so that�ll have to be *next* chapter. I know Ryo got very little time in this, it just ended up that way. I wanted to be a bit more detailed with Dee and JJ�s last night. The next one is very much Dee/Ryo centric though. So read it�please.
Sorry this took so long (comparatively). And thanks for all the great reviews! Keep em coming.
The next chapter will be soon. I only work Sunday and Tuesday this coming week, so I shouldn�t have a problem with it.
Love and Kisses,
Reika
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The Time For Change Is Now