Zoro Learns Some Manners

…so I’m just borrowing them for the sake of Yaoi. Once I’m done then I promise to wipe them off and give them back ;) Any resemblance to real people is coincidental - these guys are pure fantasy!


Warning: contains a lot of very strong language and steamy Yaoi / boysecks (Zoro x Sanji)


Thanks to Suvroc for giving me some advice / ideas for the start of this chapter! This one is dedicated to Saiyako and mask_of_red for their fantastic advice on the ZoSan interaction in this chapter. You guys are legends :D For those of you who aren't fans of fluff, I promise that we'll be back to sex and violence really soon!


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The waves rolled slowly on under a clear blue sky. The sun shone down onto turquoise water and sea gulls hung magically on the breeze.


The swordsman sat and contemplated the sand between his feet. Fine and white, milled from thousands of years of restless ocean. It was the culmination of so much time and energy, but thinking of a beach without it was almost impossible. It was just how he felt about Sanji. But then again, everything reminded him of Sanji. It had been too long since he had breathed in the sweet warm smell of tobacco, spices, and sex.


Zoro’s body thrummed with a familiar ache… He wanted the cook. He wanted to run his fingers across that ribbed stomach and that fucking beautiful ass. He wanted to kiss him slowly from his lips all the way down…


How the hell had he gotten from sand to ass anyway?


Damn it.


It was probably just because he’d had a bad night’s sleep. Well, more that Sanji had slept badly. With Zoro’s highly trained senses, he woke up every time the cook stared at him over Chopper’s head. Just like he was staring at him now.


Zoro met the icy blue eyes with a scowl. He actually wasn’t sure whether he felt grumpy or smug – but given Sanji’s mood it seemed safer to match it.


The cook glared out at him from under a silky wave of blonde,


“I don’t know how yet, but I swear this is your fault”


Zoro just stared back at him. It was the baka-Captain who had left them there; it had nothing to do with him. Turned out that for once he hadn’t given the idiot enough credit. He knew Luffy was up to something (he was about as transparent as glass noodles) but he hadn’t expected to be stranded on a tiny island with no-one but the cook for company.


That was a bit of a surprise.


It was a sweet gesture really, but he’d got the timing all wrong. Typical Luffy. Normally they’d be able to take advantage of being alone and disappear into the forest. As it was, the cook was shirty, and Zoro was still trying to form a battle strategy.


A good one.


Shitty cook couldn’t have it both ways. He wanted to sleep with Zoro but he didn’t want to be seen with him afterwards. Well, tough. A real man honours his responsibilities and commitments, and NO-ONE was going to use Roronoa Zoro as a mild distraction. With him it was all or nothing.


And it would be all.


The waves lapped gently, the cool breeze blew and the cook and the swordsman sat side by side glaring out at the ocean like it owed them something.


“So what the fuck are we going to do?” Sanji kicked some sand, which got caught by the wind and blew back into Zoro’s face.


Good question.


“We could swim” the swordsman said. It wasn’t really that far to the Island that they had started on. A few miles of open ocean swimming would be a perfect way to warm him up and to cool the cook down. He could hold his swords above his head for that long, no hassle.


“I’m not fucking swimming!” Sanji spat back.


“Afraid of a little water?”


“This suit is worth more than your life marimo.” The cook stroked the delicate wool weave lovingly, then took off the jacket and laid it down with unnecessary care in the sand.


Zoro sighed and muttered under his breath, “More than your life, maybe. Anonymous Pirate B…” he felt Sanji stiffen beside him.


“What was that?” the cook hissed. His voice was dangerously low and calm.


“Nothing” the swordsman huffed. Come on, think! What the hell should he do? Zoro knew what he wanted to do but a certain firecracker blonde didn’t seem to be in the mood for any fun.


Zoro scowled for real this time. Always his damn rules.


At least the anger helped him to pick his strategy. He rolled his hips around and swept Sanji up with his legs, pinning him to the ground before he had time to react. The cook struggled and practically spat venom.


“What the fuck are you doing!?”


Zoro looked down at the flustered, grumpy man.


“Are you going to teach me how to fight, or what?” He gazed down at the cook placidly.


Nothing Sanji hated more than calm Zoro. That would have to be weapon number one. The swordsman stifled a smirk and tightened his grip with his knees.


Sanji looked confused and then a smile finally tugged at the corner of his mouth, but he wouldn’t let it show through. Baka-cook wanted to waste their time together sulking. He was so easy to bait though…


“I can sit here all day” Zoro said, pressing his full weight down onto the idiot’s chest.


“That’s what you think.” Sanji let the grin take over his face and bucked his powerful hips. When Zoro leaned forwards to keep from toppling over Sanji trapped his hands and pushed him sideways, rolling them both over. Next thing the swordsman knew he was on his back in the sand with Sanji between his legs.


“You want training?” The blonde had a dangerous glint in his eyes. Zoro’s heart rate got just a little faster.


“No shit” he said, looking deep into those startling blue eyes.


“No shit, Sensei - thank you very much.” Sanji leaned forward and pinned Zoro’s hands with his own. The swordsman could feel the sharp hips digging in between his legs as the cook leaned over him. It was pretty damn distracting actually. By the glint in the blonde’s eyes, that was the whole point. Oh well, if he wanted to play games then lust would make a perfect addition to the arsenal: weapon number two.


Zoro struggled and ripped his hands from the cook’s grasp. He grabbed Sanji and pulled him down into a deep kiss, claiming him, and holding him close. Finally, he released him, and whispered into the blonde’s ear,


“So ero-Sensei…” Sanji was still between Zoro’s legs so the swordsman wrapped them around the cook’s waist, “you want me to struggle or should I just take it like a good boy?”


Sanji didn’t blush; he was trying to stay grumpy. Damn it. So sure that would work.


Then Zoro noticed that his breath caught - just a little. The swordsman was grateful again for his skills at analyzing body language. Years of fighting total strangers hadn’t been wasted... The cook always recovered quickly though.


“From where I’m sitting you don’t have a choice. Your ground fighting is shit.” Sanji grinned down at him, smug and confident. That’s what he thought. Zoro could easily throw the cook halfway up the beach but he’d finally stopped sulking so it would be a risk. Damn moody bastard.


Different tactic. Weapon number three - something he and the cook did so well.


“Well you’re my teacher so whose fault is that?” Zoro returned the grin in spades.


Sanji opened his mouth for a witty retort, but a smooth feminine voice rang out before the words left his lips,


“So here you are… Roronoa Zoro. Not bad at all.”


A deeper male voice joined the chorus, “And one of his closer friends by the look of it.”


As they scrambled apart, a chuckle rang out from the forest behind them and two people stepped out onto the beach. A man and a woman in figure hugging black satin. Sanji went to pieces just a little bit more with every step closer. Sometimes certain women could have an unusual effect on him, and this one was a stunner. It was the exotic couple from the bar, in all their perfect glory. Up close and in technicolour.


Zoro glared at the cook and then addressed his question to the woman. The sooner this was over, the sooner he could get back to changing Sanji’s mind.


“So what do you want?” Short. Sharp. To the point.


“Your precious bounty head.” The woman smiled as she drew two long knives from her black leather belt. Blades, eh? Perfect. They were serrated, jagged, and shiny too. Nasty looking things.


Maybe she could earn his respect after all.


The man draped himself over her shoulder and said, “We’re lucky to find you separated from your crew. Never thought you’d have those sorts of habits…” the man cast his gorgeous green eyes over the cook’s crumpled clothes and smiled knowingly.


“I am part of his damn crew!” Sanji spat at him, before he returned to gazing disturbingly at the woman’s cleavage.


The swordsman ignored him, and addressed woman again. She seemed to be the one in charge.


“You’re welcome to try and take it, but you should tell us your names first. I like to know the names of the people I kill.” Zoro smiled pleasantly. Well, as pleasantly as he could. It was a smile much like that of a shark; menacing and pointy. He slowly drew one katana, relishing the sound of the perfectly oiled blade sliding from the scabbard.


“Jade de Montford, and my sister…” said the man as he lazily drew a pair of long knives identical to his partner’s.


“Jynx de Montford,” said the woman “that all?” A bemused smile danced on her lips.


“Yep.” Zoro grinned back. At least there wasn’t going to be a long speech explaining why they wanted him dead. Oh, he hated those.


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“You did WHAT?!”


“I left them on an island!” The round brown eyes blinked up innocently.


“But you said you were going fishing!”


“I DID go fishing!” Luffy grinned wide and held up a fish the size of a mackerel. “See!”


Nami sighed, tapped her foot on the wooden pier and tried to think of a question that would wring a tiny amount of sense out of him.


“WHY did you leave them on an island Luffy?”


“They need to talk” The Captain grinned (even wider, as only Luffy can) and poked his fish “Do you think Sanji can make something out of this? Or should I just eat it now?” he peered into the glassy eyes, trying to get the fish to give up its secrets.


Nami ignored the babble and tried to get him back on topic “About what? Can’t they abuse each other just as well on the ship?”


Luffy grinned and shrugged, “It just seemed like a good idea!” He picked up his fishing rod and looked at his tiny catch.


“Maybe I should go fishing again. Wanna come?”


Nami took a deep breath, and then let it out as she counted to five before replying.


“NO. I. DO. NOT. WANT. TO COME.” Luffy’s looked shocked for a minute and then, just as quickly, he laughed.


“You’re so grumpy!”


Nami sighed again. She didn’t want him to get bored and wander off because she needed information but she was not going to be abandoned on some God-forsaken anonymous island because Luffy decided that she needed some air. Actually, now that she thought of it…


“Look,” she said in her best calm-but-not-letting-up-on-the-threat-factor-one-little-bit voice “which island did you leave them on?”


“That one!”


Luffy grinned and pointed to a purple mountain rising up out of the sea on the horizon. The island they were on was part of an archipelago, so there were lots of little islands scattered about. The locals used dug-outs to paddle from one island to another. Luffy had hired a dug-out, convinced the very grumpy Zoro and Sanji to go fishing with him, and then dumped them.


What the hell was he thinking?


Of course! He wasn’t thinking.


She should have known better. This was Luffy, after all.


And what would Zoro and Sanji have to talk about anyway? Nami stared out at the ocean. They were still behaving very strangely. First there was that period when they didn’t fight at all, then there was the fact that they barely screamed now when they fought… And they had been spending a lot of time together. Maybe they had finally settled their differences and decided to act like men instead of like primary school kids with a substitute teacher.


Yeah, right.


Time for a little sleuthing.


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Zoro watched the dark haired de Montford’s closely. Two pairs of level emerald green eyes stared back at him. They must be twins; they had the same body type and the same manner of movement. They even had the same sort of condescending curl to their generous lips. They were a little ‘close’ for brother and sister; they were lounging all over each other. It was as if Jade couldn’t even hold himself up without his sister’s support.


He wasn’t the only one having trouble keeping his feet. Zoro could feel the cook flailing around behind him. Little pink hearts floated up into the swordsman’s peripheral vision. The lady moved slowly with a grace that spoke of great physical control. Her brother seemed to use only the minimum amount of energy required to remain standing. There was something about him though – he might just be able to move quickly when he wanted to. They both looked very light on their feet.


Jade stretched out behind his sister and then turned so the two of them were back to back. They lifted their arms up and out - into a black cross. The four long knives, with their narrow handles, were threaded between their intertwined fingers.


Zoro grinned and undid the bandana from his arm. Sanji finally came out of his trance.


“Oi, marimo. What do you think you’re doing?”


Zoro grinned and tied the bandana over his head.


“You’d better not hurt her.” The cook persisted.


“I won’t hurt her…” Sanji sighed in relief “…she won’t feel a thing.” The swordsman grinned sadistically.


Sanji glared at him. Idiot had better not go overboard; there was no excuse for beating up a lady unnecessarily.


“It’s sweet of you to worry honey…”


As the low sultry voice distracted Sanji, a jagged blade sliced through the air and the cook jumped back to avoid the edge. He turned fluidly onto his hands and then sprang back again onto his feet. He only had a second to register that the twins were gone before long black hair tickled his cheek.


Her long soft, black hair was caressing his cheek.


Sanji’s knees went a little weak.


His heart started to race.


He could feel the warmth from her gorgeous body behind him. From both of them together…


And with that… he went back into the trance.


“Jynx-san! Please take me prisoner!” he cried, before crumpling to the ground like a pile of love jelly. The four raised blades came down on him, as he sat in a heap. A whirling wind of silver glare spun around his head and his skin burned. The dancing blades carved a thousand arcs, then as suddenly as it had started, it stopped.


Sanji looked down; his lovely white shirt was in ribbons. Very thin red ribbons. The cuts weren’t that deep. They stung more than ached; but boy, did they sting. She was adorable though… such soft sweet pale…


The cook's train of thought was roughly derailed as he was knocked into the air. He landed about twenty metres up the beach, spun over a couple of times, and then landed on his feet.


“What did you do that for shit head?!” the irate blonde raged.


“I’ll be your opponent” Zoro said to Jynx. He stood opposite her, all three swords gleaming in the sun.


“It’s not that simple, honey” as Jynx smiled, her brother turned and looked over her shoulder, his sensuous lips curling in an identical smile.


“We like to fight together, so you’ll just have to deal with both of us.” Jade grinned wickedly and twirled his two knives before intertwining his fingers with his sister’s again.


“Fine. Whatever.” Zoro smiled back around the hilt of Wadou and took his stance. The cursed sword had been crying for blood, maybe it was time to feed it…


“Stop it!” The voice was hard and stern. He almost didn’t recognise it. Zoro turned around slowly. Sanji stood with his hair low over his eyes. He quivered with suppressed energy.


“You shouldn’t use your swords against a woman.” He lifted his head and met Zoro with a stare that dared him to defy.


“Why not?” Zoro removed the sword from his mouth but he didn’t concede an inch. Sanji continued,


“Because it’s just wrong, damnit! Didn’t anyone teach you any damn manners?”


Zoro just glared at him. He knew what he wanted to say, but it was not the time for it. The swordsman turned to give his full attention to the twins. They were lounging and laughing at the lover’s quarrel, but their complacency wouldn’t last long. Once they had finished wiping his blood off their weapons, they would be ready to really fight.


Sanji wouldn’t let it go though,


“Put them away!”


“Look at yourself!” Zoro shouted back. The blonde’s blood was slowly soaking his shirt. It was almost entirely red now. Zoro knew the cook would be fine. That wasn’t the point. She had blades. She had fucking marked him. So she would be his next step on the road to glory.


Simple.


Sanji marched up to Zoro.


He poked the swordsman in the chest and waved his cigarette around for illustration.


“You have. No. Damn. Respect.”


“I have no respect?” Zoro’s eyes narrowed as he tried to keep calm.


“You treat women like trash!”


“I treat women like people. Like equals. Like warriors. That is respect.” Zoro bit the words off one by one.


Sanji gaped at him as the implications of his words sunk in. How DARE Zoro suggest that he had more respect for the fairer sex than the love-cook himself?!


“YOU HAVE NO IDEA ABOUT WOMEN!!!” he screamed into Zoro’s face.


“YOU can’t see what a hypocrite you’re being!” The swordsman shouted back.


“Are you almost done?” Jynx asked, looking up from filing her nails.


“SHUT UP!” Zoro and Sanji shouted in unison. Jynx rolled her eyes. Her brother yawned and stretched his perfectly toned body.


Sanji suddenly realised what he had said and melted to his knees,


“Forgive me Jynx-chan, the idiot marimo made me angry!” he said.


Zoro looked down at him and scowled. He didn’t quite know who he wanted to hurt more. Baka-cook and his stupid chivalry trip… But seeing Sanji crumpled in a heap and covered in blood helped him to decide. He put Wadou back into his mouth and turned to face the amused pair.


They would pay for what they had done.


And then he would deal with Sanji.


He stepped out, watching the twin’s feet as he started to turn into his first strike. He felt a leg shoot out behind him and he jumped to avoid being knocked into the sand.


“Don’t push me, cook” he said slowly, as he turned around. Instead of the cocky grin he was used to, the face that greeted him was full of concern. It had a funny effect on him. For some reason he couldn’t make himself turn away.


“What?!” he growled at his bloody lover.


“At least talk to me.”


Zoro sighed, this was ridiculous. But somehow, even though his mind was unleashing a torrent of pain, his body was walking back up the beach to hear what the idiot had to say. What was his damn problem all of a sudden?!


“You never cared before” he stated, “what the hell is going on?” He wanted this talk to be as quick and painless as possible. Damn cook.


“Before it was life or death. We did what we had too, but now…” Sanji trailed off.


“What’s changed?”


“You.”


“Us?”


“No. You.” Zoro stayed perfectly still and held his breath just in case he did something really stupid. Finally Sanji continued,


“Now you don’t have to kill people anymore.”


Zoro bit his tongue. Hard. What was the cook thinking? Was he about to challenge Zoro’s dream? He thought that the cook would understand. If he didn’t, then…


“You’re better than that.”


Zoro bit his lip. Even harder than his tongue. Better?!


Sanji looked up, the colour slowly rising in his cheeks. He chewed his lip too and for a moment, there was only the two of them on the whole island. Finally the blonde looked away.


“You don’t need them. You’re so fucking strong.” He mumbled into his hair.


Finally Zoro replied, “I do need them. They’re my dream.”


Sanji sighed. “I know” he said. He stared down at his shoes and Zoro was suddenly struck by how gorgeous he looked. He’d never seen the cook contrite before. In truth he didn't really believe that Sanji had it in him. Bastard wasn’t perfect after all... and he even knew it.


Zoro put one hand on the down covered chin and tilted it until the blonde curtain parted and he could look Sanji in the eyes.


“I’ll use the swords” he said. Sanji nodded gently in acceptance. “…but I won’t hurt them. I promise.”


The blue eyes shone like beacons. For a minute the swordsman was lost, but then there was a light to guide him home.


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