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Our Beginning	By : Eliza_Kitty Category: +S to Z > Wolf's Rain Views: 2797 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 1
Disclaimer: I do not own the characters or series of Wolf’s Rain. They belong to BONES & Keiko Nobumoto. This story is non-profit for my own and others’ enjoyment. Thank you. :)

Chapter List
- 14
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Okay… so I am going to warn everyone that this is probably the darkest chapter of the entire fic. So please be warned. It is not for those weak of heart. It contains severe character abuse… It might disturb some readers. But if you can work through it, it does not last forever and it will be very important for the characters’ developments. So bite your lip and bear with me, people…

Caution: Further chapters will contain mature content such as language and yaoi, Tsume/Toboe. Be forewarned.

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters or series of Wolf’s Rain. They belong to BONES & Keiko Nobumoto. This story is non-profit for my own and others’ enjoyment. Thank you. :)

I Hate You

“Ts-tsume…” the woman breathed, slowly releasing the gun and lowering it to her side. Her eyes began to tear as she looked at the man who stood in front of her. She appeared to be shocked with disbelief, her eyes wide and mouth open. She stepped back, placing a hand over her forehead. “Is that really you?” she asked, shaking.

With that the woman bit her lip, left the gun on the desk and ran to the man in front of her, throwing herself against him. She cried into his chest, clinging onto him. But he did not wrap his arms around her or do anything. He just stood there.

In a moment and with a soft moan escaping her lips, the woman stepped back and gazed at him, smiling. But he did not smile back at her. He was frozen, his eyes vacant and gone. “Tsume?” she asked, “Aren’t you happy to see me? It’s been so long…” she reached up to his face in an attempt to caress him but the man grabbed her wrist and pushed her back.

“Why are you here?!” he demanded angrily.

Danielle did not expect the cold reaction and stepped back against the desk. She glanced to her side, finding the location of the weapon on the top of the desk. It was only a few inches from her hand if she needed it. She glanced back to Tsume, frowning, “What do you mean?” she spoke slowly.

The man was enraged, his brow furrowed and his teeth gritted. Part of him wanted to strangle her, the other part longed to reach out to her and take her in his arms. But he couldn’t do that. Something wasn’t right. “You died… 3 years ago.”

When she did not say anything he continued, “Keith told me you were dead. And I believed it! Why?! Why are you here?!” He wanted answers.

“He had to! To protect me!” she spat out, tears reappearing in her eyes. She gripped onto the desk behind her, “But they found out! And that’s why I’m here! They came after me…“ She looked down, “Tsume, please…”

“Where’s Keith?” he growled.

“Um, I don’t know. I’m not sure.” She quickly replied.

“You do know.” He accused her, “You’re lying to me.”

She could feel the tension in the room; it was too thick to even cut with a knife. This man wanted answers and she needed to give him something. As she was about to go on he continued, “You’re lying about everything aren’t you?”

There was no answer.

“I’m not fucking stupid!” he screamed. “TELL ME!” He didn’t want to believe it. But he needed to hear it. He needed to hear her say it.

“I’m sorry!” she yelled, “Please, Keith made me do it! He’s involved with this group and he needed the money. He really was going to die… I didn’t have any other choice! He’s my brother! Tsume, please!” She felt she was begging for her life as the look on his face was menacing. When there came no reply she continued, desperately trying to reach him. “I didn’t want to hurt you… But don’t you see? There was no other way…”

“You mean to tell me that for the past four years… Do you even realize what you put me through?! I sold my soul to help you!” he yelled angrily, biting his lip, “Dammit, Danielle! I loved you!”

“Tsume, I’m sorry… I still love you. I always have…” she pleaded, stepping towards him.

“No.” he replied coldly.

She stopped, waiting for his reaction, her hand reaching for the gun.

“It was all a lie. The whole damned thing!” he yelled, clutching his fist and slamming it into a pile of boxes that stood next to him. They were knocked over, their contents noisily spilling out onto the floor. “You have no fucking idea… what you have done…” he was growling now and he could feel his blood boiling inside of him, his animalistic instincts wanting to let go.

He looked up when he watched her quickly swing the gun at him again, her facial expression now changed to one of determination and anger. “Fine!” she spat, “If you won’t listen to me then… then this is the way it has to be.”

He couldn’t believe how quickly she had changed her demeanor. Who was this?

“You never did get it. Don’t you see? You were stupid!” she growled, “All those times, Keith asked you and you said no. You could have been something.”

“What the fuck are you talking about?” he seethed.

“You know! Don’t play stupid with me! …He wanted you to join up in that gang of his and you never would. You thought you were too good for him!” she explained, “I never even knew until he asked me…” she glanced down as her voice saddened before quickly looking back up, regaining her confidence. “It was always you that Keith paid more attention to... He never gave me the time of day! I wasn’t even his sister to him. I was a pet!”

Tsume did not say anything as she continued, “But look at it all now!” she gestured one arm around the room, still aiming the gun in the other. “He did come to me eventually… when he saw that you were useless.” She bit her lip, “I WAS THERE! …I LISTENED!”

“It was never like that.” He growled.

“SHUT UP!” she screamed back at him, “LISTEN TO ME!”

“NO! YOU LISTEN!” he screamed back at her, “…I don’t know why your brother is doing this or who he is working for but you can’t do this! You’re throwing your life away getting mixed up in all of this!” he yelled, pleading with her. He was angry but he couldn’t watch this any longer.

“You don’t get it, do you?” she asked coldly.

Tsume’s facial expression began to change back to anger as she explained further, “It was me. I never needed Keith. I held all the power. With my brother, with the others… with you.”

Danielle raised the gun, directly aiming it at the man’s head. “This is the only way… I’m sorry, Tsume…”

The weapon was fired simultaneously as the woman’s face became one of shock and horror, seeing not a man but a silver wolf lunging for her. The creature’s body was massive and strong as it now stood over her, her body collapsed beneath him on the floor. “What are you?” she whispered slowly in disbelief.

The beast snarled at her, his fur and muscles soaked in the blood of her followers. His teeth were white and sharp, stained with red and gleaming in the light. She then found herself quickly aiming the gun once more at him, immediately firing as she attempted to defend herself.

It was when the shot had been fired that she also lost all consciousness, her life stolen in a moment’s notice by dagger like fangs baring into her face and throat. Her eyes became locked with the wolf’s piercing golden eyes, the sight forever frozen in the cold gaze of the lifeless woman’s corpse.

…

The boy looked to the clock on the wall, sighing to himself. It had been at least two hours, but it felt much longer than that. He had been nervously watching the time ever since his companion left him alone. He was still sitting on the sofa, anxiously clutching his legs against his body. He buried his face into his knees as he sat there in the dark, waiting.

Where was Tsume?

He couldn’t help but worry about him. The look on his face after that news report, the cold sound of his voice, everything… it had scared him. What was going on? He figured he had gone to meet those men that were after them. But what if… what if something had happened? What if he didn’t come back?

Toboe thought about this idea for a moment. He felt his heart stop. Why didn’t he stop him?!

He was so sick of his own insecurities of being fearful of everything. But he was trying. He had spoken up many times, stood up for himself and… said things he knew he shouldn’t have.

Was it because of what he said? …He had made terrible accusations of his friend. And now, when it mattered the most, he had just let Tsume go.

The sound of the front door opening stole the boy from his thoughts. He spun around to see the man returning from his errand, slowly opening the door. “Tsume!” he shouted gleefully, happy to see him back home in one piece.

He leapt off the sofa, running to greet him at the door. “I was so worried! I’m so glad-“ he stopped when a metallic scent entered his nostrils. He could barely see the man entering through the door as it was very dark, no light aside from the overcast shadows of the half-full moon. “Tsume,” he breathed anxiously, watching as the man stepped past him.

Toboe closed the door behind him, turning back to face him. He could now see that the man’s clothes were stained in blood. “Tsume, are you injured?!” He began to panic but quickly realized that the blood did not belong to him at all.

“Tsume, what-“ the boy’s words were cut off when the man took hold of his lips with his own. He held onto his arms, slamming him against the wall behind them. The boy cried out in pain as he felt the hard wall hit his back. The man’s tongue entered his mouth, shooting to the back of his throat, his lips pressing hard against him.

Toboe yelped, moving his face away from him. “Tsume!” he shouted, still smelling the blood on him. It was not only on his clothes but on his breath as well. What had happened?

He struggled beneath the strong body, trying to move out from under him. He felt pain in his arms as the man’s hands dug into him, his body pressed hard against him. The boy could feel the man’s member hardened through his clothes, also pressing into him. He blushed furiously. The man moved to kiss his neck, nipping at him with his teeth. The boy cried out again, throwing his head back as an odd energy surged up his body. What was he… what was he doing? Why was he acting like this?

Toboe then felt the man’s hand at his belt, prying at his pants and fitting his hand into them. He yelped when he felt himself being roughly grabbed and pulled. His face was fully flushed now as he resisted as well as he could, pressing his hands against the man’s shoulders. “Tsume,” he breathed, “No, please…” He didn’t want to. Not like this.

He cried out in pain when he felt forced upon harder each time he resisted, slammed into the wall again, the man’s tongue lapping at his neck. He threw his head back and yelped as he felt a hand running up inside his shirt, scratching and grabbing at his soft skin. He couldn’t… he couldn’t do this. “No!” he shouted, feeling his pants falling to his ankles. He heard the sound of the man’s pants being unzipped. His eyes widened and he gasped, feeling his body being thrown onto the back of the sofa.

The boy cried out again as his stomach hit the rough edge, knocking the wind out him. He turned halfway around to catch a glimpse of golden eyes, hollow and vacant as they stood behind him. The man’s stare was cold and icy, but not as when he would act that way normally. It was as if he himself were not even there. “No, Tsume! Please, don’t do this!” he pleaded, trying to pull himself away. “Tsume!” he began to cry.

“SHUT UP!” shouted an angry reply.

But it was not just an answer. It was a threatening command.

The boy didn’t know what to think. He didn’t know who this even was anymore. He felt strong hands on his hips and he bit his lip, afraid to say anything more. “Ahhhh!” he cried out again as he felt his body tightening when it was roughly forced into. He desperately tried to hold back painful moans as he was violated but it was no use.

He could feel the sofa moving closer to the wall, clearing furniture away from it with each thrust, the sound of it skidding and creaking against the wooden floor. He gulped, crying out in pain each time it happened. The boy clutched onto the sofa’s soft cushions for his only comfort, his forehead now sweaty as his hair fell down in his face. The man’s hands held tight on his hips, holding him in place, unable to escape. He was shocked and frightened, scared and not wanting to move.

It began to get faster now, the man behind him roughly driving into his shaking body. He could hear him grunting and growling like a wild animal, his pace quickening. The boy felt his body and voice going numb, his mind beginning to fade. And then, it was all over in a moment’s notice. With one final push and growl the man burrowed himself into him. A soft moan escaped the boy’s lips when it was over, tears streaming down his rosy cheeks.

He was pulled out of, his body slumping down from the sofa’s back edge. He collapsed onto the cold wooden floor, seeing the man above him through the strands of auburn hair that fell into his face. The boy shot his eyes downward, embarrassed and not wanting to face him as he lay frozen on the floor. But it was not long before he saw the man’s legs walking out of the room, loudly slamming a door from the hallway, closing it behind him.

It was then the boy finally let himself go. He curled his weak legs up against himself, wincing at the pain as he did so. He brought his shaking hands up to cover his face, ashamed. He cried painfully, wet tears and snot seeping through his fingers. The sound of the shower being turned on echoed from the hallway. He listened as he moaned painful tears, wanting to wash away everything that had just happened. “Ts-tsume…” he choked through his sobs.

…

It was an hour or so later that he heard the faucet being turned off. The boy’s face was red and swollen from his sorrow filled emotions. He wanted to keep crying but he couldn’t let himself go now that the man might see him. He was afraid, afraid of what more he might do. He listened quietly, still lying on the floor in the same position, keeping his body frozen as if it might protect him.

His eyes widened when he heard the bathroom door now opening and he felt himself begin to shake. He wanted to run away, he wanted to hide, but he couldn’t move. He felt trapped inside of his own body. But then he heard footsteps venturing from the bathroom to another door in the hallway, his bedroom.

He could feel his pulse begin to race as his body became unlocked. He sat up, holding back a groan as the pain shot through his weak body. But he ignored it, gathering his pants at his heels and pulling them up. He gripped onto the corner of the wall behind him, bringing himself up to his feet. Biting his lip, he entered into the hallway, looking down the dark corridor to his bedroom door. There was light coming from underneath the door, shadows forming. He had to move quickly.

He found himself hurriedly stumbling to the bathroom a few feet away, unable to run. Once inside he shut the door behind him, leaning back against it. He sighed a breath of relief, catching a glimpse of himself in the mirror. Looking away shamefully at the image, he proceeded to the tub.

It was still steamy from Tsume having just used it.

Tears were brimming on his eyes again as he knelt down to turn the shower on. “Tsume…” he muttered to himself, his sobs coming back. He began to slowly strip off the articles of clothing as he sat on the edge of the tub. Everything smelt like blood and sex, including himself. He had to wash it all away. He couldn’t stand it. He felt sorrowful. He felt violated. He felt inhuman.

He crawled over the edge of the tub, standing up and pulling the curtain across. He stood there as tears streamed down his face along with the water pouring down on him. The warm water felt so good on his aching body. He began to get lost in his thoughts as he looked up to the ceiling, feeling comfort from the warm water soaking into his hair and the shadows of light that flickered through the shower curtain.

Nothing would ever be the same now. Everything they had shared together… It meant nothing. Nothing. He felt so alone.

He reached out for a bar of soap down by his knee, biting his lip when he bent over to do so. As he rubbed the soap along his body, he winced as it touched painful spots that would be bruised by tomorrow.

He did this to him. Tsume.

He didn’t want to believe it. He didn’t want to accept it. He couldn’t accept it.

What was wrong with him? Why did he have so much faith in that man?

As he was beginning to lose hope before he heard the sound of the bathroom door being slowly opened. His body became frozen, his eyes widening. His breathing stopped as his mind began to race. No… Why hadn’t he locked the door?!

He found himself back up against the shower’s wall, watching a shadow coming closer through the curtain. And then a hand drew up to pull back the curtain, a leg stepping in over the edge. The body of the man was naked. He didn’t have to look at his face. He knew it was Tsume.

He couldn’t look at him. “No!” he screamed, turning around to run away, but he was stopped by the shower’s wall. He had nowhere to go. He was trapped.

He began to panic. He couldn’t do this again. Not ever again. “No, Tsume! Please, no!” he begged, not holding back any tears. He didn’t care anymore. It would never be the same so what did it matter?

He felt his arm being grabbed, turning his body around. He pulled back, resisting as his free arm began to beat upon the man’s shoulder. “No!” he shouted as he was pulled closer. And then he felt something inside of him snap lose. He became enraged with anger, bitterness and hatred. He would not be taken so easily, not again.

“GET AWAY FROM ME!” he screamed through his tears, freeing his arm and pushing the man away, causing him to step back.

“Toboe,” came a soft voice.

No, he thought. He would not look at him, not wanting to identify the man’s features of his face. He would not be broken.

“Toboe…” the voice came again as he saw arms reaching out to him. “Toboe, I’m-“

“NO!” he angrily cut off the man’s words. He waved an arm at him, managing to strike the man across the face. His heart stopped, not knowing what he might do now. He pushed himself off of the man and back to the shower wall, finding himself slumping down to the tub’s floor.

Toboe wrapped his arms around himself for protection, bringing his legs up against his body. He buried his face into his knees as water dripped from his soaked hair and face. “Leave me alone!” he yelled, “Go away!” He bit his lip and continued, “I DON’T WANT YOU ANYMORE!”

His eyes widened and his body froze when he said that, realizing that it was all over. Everything they had together really was gone.

But his thoughts were soon interrupted when he felt a strong hand on his arm, pulling him back up to his feet. He was forced into the man’s embrace, strong arms wrapped around him. He began to resist once more until the man speak, “I’m sorry, Toboe!” He could hear the shaking in Tsume’s voice. Was he crying?

The hug grew tighter, “I’m so sorry…” the man repeated.

Toboe pulled back, beating as hard as he could upon Tsume’s chest. “No! No… no, no… no…” With each word he spoke the boy could feel himself releasing the anger. He gave up, falling completely into the man’s arms. He frowned, feeling Tsume shaking, choking out his sobs as he tightly held onto the boy’s body.

The boy found himself wrapping his arms around the sobbing man that held onto him. Toboe buried his head into his chest, biting his lip. “I hate you, Tsume…” he muttered, tears now streaming down his own face.

***

I know… it’s gonna get better, I promise. Everything will change now, for the better. :) I know a lot of you probably hate me for abusing them… I’m almost afraid to ask for reviews. …But please keep reading! No more bad stuff between them, only fluff from here on out! :D
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Our Beginning