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Innocent Rain	By : saxonjesus Category: +. to F > D. Gray Man Views: 3947 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
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Chapter List
- 18
- 19
- 20
Chapter 19�Give Me Novacaine

October 1, 2013�Yuu�s Room

�� A giddy feeling
flitted clenchingly through Lavi�s stomach as he
looked down at Yuu�s face. For the first time that he could remember, the
dark-haired Japanese man was smiling in his sleep, his brow unfurrowed,
and a look of complete peace on his
slack face. Lavi reached down and brushed a strand of hair from the other man�s
cheek. He noted a very light scar there but ignored it, drinking in the view
and fixing it irrevocably in his mind.

�� He did wish he
could have something to read, though. Not that Yuu was boring, but Lavi always
felt most at peace watching Yuu sleep as he read a nice, good book. He had
realized this when Yuu had been despondent.

�� Yuu�s smile grew a
bit, and he mumbled something incoherent that sounded convincingly like �Rabi.� Lavi�s heart melted,
and he carded his hand through Yuu�s hair again. It was so soft and silky, and
it was fun to play with. He relished the fact that he could now�although he
doubted that Yuu would allow him to braid it. He still thought Yuu would look
damn sexy in a braid. But Yuu didn�t think so. It was an unfortunate state of
affairs, but Lavi would have to wear his�what was Yuu now? Could he be
considered a lover? Well, whatever Yuu was, Lavi would wear him down
eventually.

�� There came a light
knock on the door, and Lavi was suddenly glad that he had locked it.

�� Lavi?
Kanda-kun?� Lenalee asked tentatively, and Lavi
groaned. Of all the people to check on them first� of course it would be Lenalee.

�� Er, Yuu�s asleep, so could you come back later?� Lavi
called out softly, desperately wishing she�d take his advice. This was not
something she should see. He surveyed the room�clothes were strewn everywhere.
Yuu�s comforter was at the opposite side of the room (when had it gotten over
there?), and Lavi saw the tube of lube lying discarded next to the bed. Add in
a sexily naked Yuu, a twice-broken headboard, and an equally naked Lavi, and it
wasn�t hard to guess just what had gone down the night before.

�� Is everything
okay?� Lenalee asked, her voice now layered with thick
worry. �I was worried about Kanda-kun� with everything last night.�

�� Lavi sighed
quietly. Of course Lenalee would
remember that. Really, she was too caring for her own good, but now was not the time for her to be upset. He had
to think of something that would make her leave.

�� Yeah,
everything�s fine!� Lavi said, throwing in some of his
elation from last night�s� activities.

�� You sound a
little too cheerful, Lavi. Are you lying to me?�

�� When had Lenalee
become so astute? �No, everything�s fine!� Lavi insisted. �Seriously!�

�� Lavi, I�m
breaking the lock. Something�s definitely wrong.�

�� No!� Lavi shouted
in horror. �Lenalee! Don�t! Yuu�s asleep, and he�s��

�� He�s unconscious
again, isn�t he?� Lenalee asked, her voice riddled
with suspicion.

�� Well, he is
asleep, but�� Lavi started.

�� I�m coming in.�
And she broke down the door. Lavi was sitting up in the bed, covers in hand and
astoundingly naked. And Lenalee saw it all.

�� She blushed
royally. �You� you sleep naked?� She asked in a small voice, and Lavi thanked
his lucky stars that she was na�ve enough to only be concerned about the
nakedness.

�� Er, yeah,� Lavi said, flushing and sitting back down,
throwing the cover back over him. Lenalee� had seen� him� Allen would never
forgive him for scarring Lenalee.

�� You guys are
really messy,� Lenalee commented, walking in nonchalantly and opening the
window.

�� Er, yeah, well, Yuu was mad last night,
and well�� Lavi trailed off, blushing, too flustered to be able to continue
convincingly.

�� Oh, is that how
the headboard got broken?� Lenalee asked pleasantly.

�� Yeah,� Lavi said,
glad to tell at least one truth. �Yuu hit it� twice.�

�� But Lavi, there�s
three indentations,� Lenalee said.

�� Oh� maybe he hit
it a third time when I wasn�t paying attention?� Lavi suggested, and Lenalee
nodded thoughtfully. When had he hit
the headboard again? Lavi found himself severely lacking in details of the
night before. It would have been distressing, except that he couldn�t find
himself regretting anything about the previous night.

�� Why hasn�t
Kanda-kun woken up yet?� Lenalee asked, obviously worried.

�� He really tired
himself out last night,� Lavi hedged, hoping that Lenalee wouldn�t question his
half-truth.

�� Well, I would
imagine so. It really smells like sweat in here. You should keep the window
open, let the room air out.�

�� Er, will do,� Lavi said, and Lenalee thankfully walked to
the door. She folded their jackets and placed them in a pile atop their shirts.

�� You should really
fold your clothes, too, otherwise they�ll get all wrinkly,� Lenalee scolded
lightly. Lavi nodded blankly. �Anything else I can get you?�

�� Er, no, I think we�re good.�

�� Tell me when
Kanda-kun wakes up, okay?� Lenalee asked, and Lavi felt glad that Yuu had
someone to worry after him like that.

�� Alright, I will,�
Lavi promised, and he meant it. A little phone call wouldn�t kill him.

�� Lenalee left the
room, closing the door lightly behind her. �Oh, hi, Allen,� she said brightly,
and Lavi nearly smacked his head in exasperation.

�� Hi,
Lenalee. Why are you around Kanda�s room?�

�� Oh, I was worried
about him.�

�� Is he okay?�

�� Oh, yeah, he�s
fine. He�s still asleep, though. He tired himself out last night, according to
Lavi. You know, he punched the headboard?�

�� Really?�
Allen asked, and he sounded suspicious.

�� Yeah, three
times, actually. And it smells really bad in there, so I opened a window. Oh,
did you know? Lavi sleeps naked.� She whispered the last bit, sounding
scandalized

�� Really?
Er, listen, Lenalee, I�er,
Amanda is looking for you, er, on the Ark, so why
don�t you go look for her?�

�� Sure,
Allen.�

�� Bye, then.�

�� Bye.�

�� A moment later,
Allen knocked on the door. Lavi sighed and rolled his eyes.

�� Yes?� He asked,
and the white-haired boy walked in.

�� So� er� Kanda tired
himself out, huh?� He asked, his voice dripping with mischievousness.

�� Yeah,� Lavi said.

�� How� wild,� Allen stated. �You look rather
tired. Did you not sleep well? Or enough?�

�� Well, I tired myself out, too,� Lavi replied,
wiggling his eyebrows suggestively.

�� Ah,� Allen said.
�Looks like you tired the headboard out, too.�

�� No, that was
Yuu,� Lavi said with a genuinely amused smile.

�� Nice,� Allen
chuckled.

�� Well, if you
don�t mind, I�m rather naked here, because, you know, I sleep naked and all. So if you could��

�� Ah, I suppose you
want to sleep some more. I�ll leave
you be.� Allen grinned widely and suggestively at Lavi and pulled the door
closed behind him as he left. Lavi got up and tried to lock it again. But then
he remembered that Lenalee had broken it. He propped Yuu�s desk chair up
against the knob and walked back to bed, ignoring the tiny urge to pee. Sleep now, he thought. Piss later.

---

�� The next time Lavi
awoke, it was nearly three in the afternoon, and Yuu was tossing about,
groaning every once in a while.

�� Yuu?�
He asked softly, poking the other man lightly.

�� I�m trying to
sleep, rabbit. Go away,� the other man grumbled, and Lavi�s worry floated away.

�� Well, you could
try waking up, ne?� Lavi said,
hugging the man from behind.

�� No, I don�t want
to. I was having a good dream.�

�� Oh? What did you
dream about?� Lavi asked, curious as to what had brought the smile to Yuu�s
face.

�� Lavi watched as
Yuu�s entire body blushed. �Come on, Yuu-chan, tell me,� Lavi said, pulling the
man closer until skin met skin. Yuu froze, and Lavi hoped the Japanese man
would forgive him for not letting go.

�� Wait� it actually
happened?� Yuu asked, his voice blank with shock. Lavi
snickered.

�� Yes. What, you
don�t remember?� Lavi felt a bit offended. Had he been that bad?

�� I thought it was
a dream,� Yuu confessed in a gruff mumble.

�� Nope, it was very
real�was it a very good dream?�

�� Yuu said nothing,
but Lavi took his silence as an affirmative gesture. Yuu still had trouble
expressing his emotions, and Lavi could do nothing but accept that. But still,
he wanted to know just what Yuu�s feelings for him were.

�� By the way, what
am I supposed to call you?� Lavi asked after the momentary pause.

�� What?� Yuu
sounded bewildered at the sudden shift in conversation.

�� Well, I mean,
we�re definitely together�everyone can see that�and I definitely love you, and
I know you said you like me. But I
don�t want to call you something like �boyfriend,� because that�s girlish and�
wrong, somehow. It�s� inadequate. But we aren�t technically lovers, because you
don�t love me, even though we�ve slept with each other, so where does that put
us, relationship-wise?�

�� Yuu turned around
to face Lavi, and his eyes were filled with an emotion Lavi had never seen.

�� But, I�� He
looked away and made two little grunts of seeming frustration. �I�� He sighed
exasperatedly and turned around again, scowling at the wall.

�� You
what?� Lavi asked, genuinely curious as to what his�whatever Yuu was�had
been about to say.

�� Nothing.
Never mind, rabbit.� Yuu sounded extremely perturbed.

�� Lavi grumbled but
accepted he wouldn�t get anything else out of the other man at this time.

�� But anyway, what
do I call you?�

�� Whatever
you want, Baka Usagi.� He
sounded almost� resigned.

�� Well, then� er, would you mind �lovers,� just for simplicity�s sake?�
Lavi asked, and the Japanese man shivered against him. Lavi knew it wasn�t from
cold. �Oh, HOLY SHIT, I have to piss!�
Lavi exclaimed, and quickly pulling on his boxers and pants, he ran from the
room. He heard an exasperated �Che�
as he left, and he couldn�t help but smile as he sprinted to the facilities.

---

�� As they walked
into the cafeteria for a very, very, late breakfast a few hours later, a loud cheer erupted around
them. Soldiers, Science Departmenters, Finders, and
Exorcists alike applauded and whistled. It was a quiet applause, one filled
with many winces and grimaces of pain, but it was applause nonetheless, and
Lavi couldn�t help but wave at the attention.

�� Don�t encourage
them,� Yuu said, grabbing Lavi�s hand from the air and slapping it to his side.

�� But Yuu�� Lavi
started, but the other man glared at him, and he quieted. It wasn�t worth Yuu�s ire.

�� Sitting on the
bench, Lavi did his best not to smile or promote the others� actions in any
way. Justin came up and patted him on the back, and Siegfried crawled onto his
head, where he curled up and fell asleep. Lavi rather thought this was what
Allen felt when Timcanpy nested in his hair.

�� How� do you all know?�
He asked incredulously, and Amanda laughed uproariously, eliciting winces all
around.

�� Well, you see,
that�s a funny story,� she said, a bright smile playing on her lips. She didn�t
look at all hung over. �Well, when Kanda stormed out and you followed, one of
the Finders just happened to be walking down the hall at the same time, and he
was like, �holy shit, Kanda�s going to murder Lavi, I should follow in case I
need to stop it,� and then he heard a bit of yelling, and then he heard your�
noises. So he went and told Allen, who told me, and I told Darcy, who told
Lolek and some soldiers, and Lolek told Miranda, who told the Director, who told the entire Science
Department, and somewhere along the line, Allen told Justin as well, and he
told pretty much everyone else, and somehow, the rest of the Finders found
out�probably from the first one�and it�s all just one big� chain of words. Or
something,� she finished lamely.

�� The room went
silent as Lenalee walked in. Allen whispered to Amanda, �remember, tell her and
you die.� The voice was that of Allen�s infamous dark side, and Lavi felt a
shiver go down his spine. By the sudden quietness of the room, Lavi could tell
the same threat had been repeated to the entire Order.

�� Morning,
everyone!� Lenalee said cheerfully, taking a seat next to Yuu. �Why are
you all so quiet?�

�� We�re all hung
over,� Amanda grimaced, obviously acting. �Aren�t you?�

�� No, I feel fine,�
Lenalee said with a large smile.

�� How?
You had a whole bottle of tequila!� Amanda exclaimed, dropping her act a bit. Lavi
would have to instruct her in that particular art someday. She had amazing
potential.

�� I really don�t
know,� Lenalee replied. From the guilty look in Allen�s eye, Lavi suspected he
had replaced it with juice or water at some point. Lenalee turned to Yuu and
gasped. �Oh my God, Kanda-kun, that�s a really large bruise!� She pointed to
the base of Yuu�s neck.

�� Yuu froze, and
Lavi fought the urge to snicker.

�� Oh, that was from
me!� Lavi said. At Allen�s murderous glare, his smile withered, so he added,
�I� hit him because he� broke the headboard with his fist. Three
times. I� didn�t mean to hit him that hard, though. But he�s not upset!�

�� I don�t know, he
looks pretty angry, Lavi,� Lenalee commented uneasily.

�� I�m just tired,�
Yuu said, scowling. Lavi shivered. He was going to be killed later. But it was
worth it.

�� The conversation
fizzled out into something that contained a little less innuendo, and Lavi
spread a good amount of strawberry jam on his morning toast. The mood gradually
changed to something darker, more somber, as everyone remembered exactly why
they were exhausted and had hangovers. Eventually, the table fell silent, and
the rest of the hall followed suit after a while. It was the first time Lavi
could remember the dining hall being so quiet, even after some of the mass
deaths of the Finders and Exorcists in the past. He looked around and saw
Vikram walk in with Emiko. He looked inconsolable, and he was dressed in a
black Armani suit.

�� Everyone who
wants to attend Choon-yei�s funeral, it�s in fifteen minutes in the Science
Department. The soldiers are being laid to rest there as well. Unfortunately,
we can�t send them back, so they�ll all be cremated.�

�� Lavi�s heart sank.
How many more had died in the last week? He knew about Choon-yei�s death, as
well as the deaths of the fifty soldiers and six Finders from Tama-chan�s group. He had heard Emiko use that nickname, and it
stuck, much to the General�s displeasure. But really, this was no time to be
joking. He grabbed Yuu�s hand and pulled him away from the bench to follow the
somber Indian Exorcist.

�� Let go, rabbit,�
Yuu protested as he was half-tugged, half-dragged across the dining hall.

�� No. You told me
not to respect your bounds anymore, so I�m not,� Lavi said lightly, squeezing
Yuu�s hand affectionately.

�� I take it back,
now unhand me.�

�� Don�t think I
will.� When they reached the doors, Lavi swept a foot under Yuu�s legs,
twirling the man into a low dip as he fell. Smirking, he kissed Yuu in front of
the entire Order. And there was definitely tongue.

�� Something very
solid connected with his cheek, and Lavi accidentally dropped the other man the
last few centimeters to the ground. Lavi went sprawling backward and stared at
the lights on the ceiling, blinking bewilderedly.

�� He watched in
confusion as Amanda nonchalantly walked over and held out a hand to his lover.
A great pool of happiness filled his stomach at that particular word, and Lavi
smiled despite his precarious position on the floor. Suddenly, he was wrenched
up, and he came face-to-face with Allen, who looked like he was holding back an
evil cackle.

�� Serves you
right,� Allen said, his voice deep and his eyes
shining with his dark side. �You know you did that in front of Lenalee, right?�

�� Lavi gulped and
bolted for the door. As he passed Yuu�s angry form, he thought he heard a
snicker, but Yuu didn�t laugh, so he must have heard someone else.

�� Thirteen minutes
later, all the Exorcists and Science Departmenters
had gathered in the large hall. Lavi nearly staggered and felt his jaw drop.
The entire room was piled with coffins to be burned, and in the center of them
all was a raised casket with an ornate cross decorating its top. There was
almost no room to stand, and friends of the Finders and soldiers were pressed
against the wall, weeping. Lavi wondered how many of the caskets contained only
ashes.

�� A small sermon was
said over the fallen soldiers and Finders, and each casket was removed until
only Choon-yei�s ornate one was left. A hollow sob ripped through the air, and
Lavi looked over to see a middle-aged man with a young couple and several small
children next to him. He gazed forlornly at Choon-yei�s casket, and a tear fell
from his eye.

�� She was like a
mother to me,� Lavi heard Vikram sob quietly, and when he turned to look at the
Indian man, he saw Emiko holding him gently to her chest.

�� It�s okay,� she
whispered consolingly. Vikram shook his head, and Lavi felt the moment was too
private and looked away. His eyes immediately sought Yuu out, and he slipped up
next to the older man.

�� Yuu turned away in
an obvious snub, and despite the fact that he deserved it,
Lavi felt a wave of depression hit him. He felt just a degree cooler. He
sniffed a little. The other man sighed exasperatedly and turned around,
glowering at Lavi.

�� Don�t do it
again,� he said in a dangerously low voice. �Lavi nodded emphatically. Yuu pulled him into
a tiny, short-lasting hug that ended as fast as a bolt of lightning.

�� And then it was
time for them to see Choon-yei off on her final journey back to Korea. As they
stood outside in the light rain�it was always raining in London�Lavi slipped
his hand into Yuu�s. This time, the man didn�t pull away. He simply remained
stoic and solid at Lavi�s side. Lavi watched as Vikram gave the young couple
and kids sad hugs.

�� Take care of
her,� he said to them, and they nodded. �I�ll come visit her grave when this
entire mess is over.�

�� Long after
everyone�including Emiko and Vikram, who had watched the family until they were
out of sight�had gone back in, Lavi and Yuu stayed outside in the rain, hands
clasped, simply enjoying the other�s company. Time stood still. When they went
back in, they had duties as Exorcists. Tamas�s and Lenalee�s groups were
merging in order to redouble the efforts to find Artemis, but they wouldn�t
leave until another group of soldiers and Finders arrived. But right now,
everything was frozen in place, unmoving and mournfully beautiful. The trees
were burnt orange and copper and yellow and red, and the wind was crisp. �Even though everything had a sad, bitter tinge
to it, Lavi couldn�t help but feel that everything was right: Yuu�s warm hand in his, the fall air, the bright sky,
everything.

�� But like every
moment, it ended, and they were brought back to their duties as they had been
every day. Yuu went to train with his sword, and Lavi sat in his room, poring
over file after file of the Earl�s activities, trying to estimate a position.
Soldiers ran drills in the background, and Finders came and went. Members of
the Science Department mumbled random formulas quietly as they developed new,
more powerful weapons for the soldiers and better equipment for everyone. If
Choon-yei�s death had any meaning, it was this: the war had begun, and it would
rage, full-tilt, until one side was decimated. Lavi could only hope it was the
other one.

---

October 3, 2013�The Dark Order, Main Branch

�� Emiko wished
Vikram would stop being an idiot and just let her in. She had been banging on
his bedroom door for about half an hour. Fed up, she opened the door, even
though ladies didn�t barge in.

�� Vikram,� she
began, �you�ve been in here for two days. It�s time to come out�locking
yourself up isn�t going to bring her back.�

�� She watched as
Vikram tied a strand of something around a rarely-used set of carnelian prayer
beads. Emiko remembered them from their youth. Vikram had once said his father
had given them to him. They were different from his Innocence, which resembled
aventurine, and Emiko knew they meant much, much more. Vikram gave out a small
sniff, and when he looked up, he smiled sadly at her.

�� Choon-yei�s
hair�I took it back.� He sounded devious, and his smile matched his tone. Emiko
felt better about her friend. Perhaps he would be able to get over it quicker
than she�d thought.

�� You would,� she
said, sending a fond smile down at him. Then, she sat next to him on the bed,
legs tucked under her and slightly off to the side. �I�ve been meaning to ask
you, though, what did Choon-yei mean, �you need to forgive your mother?��

�� Vikram winced
slightly, but he sighed. �I knew you were going to ask that. It�s just� I�
well, my mother hates me. The last thing she said to me was �I never want to
see your face again.��

�� Emiko gasped,
horrified. �Why?� She squeaked.

�� She�s Christian.
I�m Hindu like Dad. She took me to church with her one day�it was the day after
my dad gave me these beads,� he held them up, grimacing, �and I was so proud to
wear them that I had them on my arm when I went with her. The Priest wanted to
take them away, and I told him no. But he tried to wrench them off my arm, and
I was so angry that I kicked him.� Vikram paused, looking around the room as if
afraid someone would overhear. �In the balls,� he finished.

�� Emiko snickered,
but she caught herself. Ladies did not laugh at others� pain.

�� Mom got so angry,
and then I got angry, too, so I ran away. Then the Exorcists found me, and they
took me to the Order before I could even clear things up with her�not that she
would want to, seeing as she hates me. I don�t think she even knows I�m alive.�

�� Emiko put a
comforting hand on his leg, and after a moment, he placed one of his own atop
her wrist.

�� I�m sure she
didn�t mean it,� she said, and Vikram shook his head.

�� You didn�t see
her face that day. She obviously hates me.�

�� But do you hate
her?� Emiko asked. There was a long silence as Vikram considered her words.

�� No,� he finally
whispered. They sat in silence for a long time. Eventually, Vikram looked at
her, a grief-ridden expression on his face.

�� I�m sorry,� he
said gravely. Emiko raised an eyebrow.

�� For
what?� She asked, thoroughly confused.

�� For not looking
for you harder,� he said. Emiko cast her mind about, trying to understand what
he was talking about. Finally giving up, she gave him a contemplative look.

�� Looking for me?�
She asked.

�� It was my fault�
that you disappeared,� he muttered quietly, looking down at his lap, where his
hand was now resting on hers. She realized what he was talking about.

�� That was a long
time ago, it�s in the past. You were ten, there was nothing you could have
done,� she said, her voice just as hushed.

�� Why aren�t you
blaming me? If I hadn�t��

�� I don�t blame
you. You couldn�t have done anything��

�� But I made you go
with us that day. If I had just let you read, then you�d be��

�� I�d be what,
Vikram? What would I be?� Why couldn�t Vikram understand that nothing had been
his fault? Chu-chan had accepted it, but Vikram couldn�t. And even though Emiko
carried a strange self-identity because of the whole thing, she had never
blamed her friends.

�� You�d be��

�� What? Normal? Because in this Order, no one�s normal, Vikram,� Emiko bit out,
laughing humorlessly in an unladylike manner.

�� But it�s still my
fault. We all know something happened to you in those seven months. I mean,
fuck, Emiko, we thought you were dead.�
Tears were swimming in Vikram�s eyes, and a vague thought hit Emiko that
perhaps she shouldn�t push this topic while the Indian boy was still raw and
hurting from Choon-yei�s death.

�� It�s not your fault, and I�ve never blamed
you. I blame Road!� There. Emiko had said it. The one thing she had kept from
everyone.

�� What?� Vikram
stared blankly at her, uncomprehending.

�� Road� took me.
It�s her fault, not yours,� Emiko said softly, looking away and shifting
uncomfortably.

�� But I was the reason you were there for the
taking in the first place!� Vikram insisted, and Emiko did something she had
never done before. She hauled off and smacked him, throwing all her body weight
into it.

�� Stop thinking that!� She screeched, unable to
contain the overflowing emotions anymore. �Road took me and made me into a
girl, and when I was returned, I couldn�t
go back to being Sasaki, because I didn�t know how, and you blaming yourself
for the whole thing isn�t helping!�

�� Vikram looked
shocked, and he brought his free hand up to his reddening cheek. His brown eyes
were wide, and he stared at her sadly, guiltily.

�� I just miss
Sasaki,� he whispered. A tear fell from one eye.

�� Well, you can�t
have him back,� Emiko snapped. Vikram flinched. �Sasaki died when Road forced
him to be Emiko.�

�� Now I think
you�re just lying, because I know Sasaki�s still there. He�s still there,
because every time you get upset, your voice goes deeper. He�s still there
because when you hit me, there�s a man�s power behind it. He�s still there
because you�re not a girl.�

�� Would you prefer
I dress like a guy, Vikram? Is that what you want?� Emiko shouted, wrenching
her hand from his.

�� Vikram shook his
head, and Emiko thought she saw a momentary flash of hurt in his eyes, but it
was gone before she could double-check. �I just want you to be yourself,� he
finally said, his voice soft and deep and hurt.

�� Emiko felt her
expression soften, but she didn�t want to be worried about him now.

�� You�re a jerk
sometimes, Vikram,� she said, and she stormed from the room, tears already pouring
down her face.

�� Slamming the door
helped her mood lift a bit, but she couldn�t forget what Vikram had said to
her. I�m not a boy anymore, she
thought angrily to herself, stomping to her own room before she broke down
completely in the hallway. Road took that
away from me.

�� She threw herself
on her bed, and she cried herself to sleep, and the next morning when she
looked in the mirror, she felt different. Staring back at her was not Emiko.
For the first time since she was seven, she saw Sasaki in her reflection. For
some reason, that made her feel at peace, like something was starting to fix
itself in her broken little world of manners and femininity.

---

October 3, 2013�Noah�s Ark,
Faith�s Room

�� The bright sun
shone in through the window, riding in through a cheery breeze. It hit Faith
lightly, and it swirled around her skin, cooling her. She smiled lightly and
looked out at the beautiful day. There were no clouds, only shining blue sky
that extended on past her line of vision. Everything was so sweet and nice and
beautiful, and she suddenly wanted to share it with someone.

�� Road!� She called
aloud, mentally summoning her favorite sister to her. A moment later, an
ornate, quilted door appeared, and Road stepped out.

�� Faith!�
She exclaimed, smiling brightly and running over to give Faith a hug.

�� Hi,
Road.� Faith looked up at her dearest sister and couldn�t contain the
feeling of pure joy and contentment that pooled in her stomach.

�� Is there anything
you need, Faith?� Road asked, looking worried.

�� Oh,
no, not at all. I was just lonely,� Faith replied, and Road pulled up a
chair next to her.

�� I miss them all,
too,� she said, and Faith knew exactly what she was talking about. All their fallen brothers and sisters�Tyki, Jasdero,
David, Skin, Cyril, Lulu, Charlie, and Sarah. True, most of them were
not the nicest of people. Faith actually despised Cyril, and she was not fond
of Lulubell, either, but she loved them all despite
their faults. They were her kin, after all.

�� Especially Tyki,�
Faith said, smiling sadly.

�� Especially Tyki,�
Road echoed.

�� Why the long
faces, my dears?� The Earl�s voice said, and when Faith looked up, he was
standing there, smiling widely as he always did.

�� Hi,
Earl!� Faith said, smiling back at him. She hadn�t seen him in a long
time. Even though she was disappointed with his plans for the Exorcists, she
still loved him, too. He was the Earl, after all. �We�re not sad, just lonely.�

�� Well, I have good
news for you!� He said. Road got up and grabbed Lero, who had followed the Earl
into the room. Swinging his head lightly into her palm, she smiled.

�� I�m sorry, Faith,
but I have homework to do. I don�t like Geometry, so I was procrastinating. If
you need me, I�ll be back, though.� She smiled again and created a door. Faith heard
Lero�s protests until it finally closed behind the
two.

�� What�s the good
news, Earl?� Faith asked. Maybe he had finally given up the idea of killing her
Heart, and he would focus instead on whatever he had originally been doing,
whatever that was.

�� I have a great
plan this time. It�s going to be apocalyptic in proportion,� he informed her.

�� Faith furrowed her
brow. �I don�t understand, Earl. What are you going to do?�

�� He told her, and
Faith understood at once the consequences of this course of action. It would,
indeed, be apocalyptic, and it was completely unnecessary.

�� Earl, I don�t
think it�s a good plan. I don�t think you should do it. Please, don�t do it,�
Faith pleaded, but the Earl turned around and produced a glass of water.

�� Would you like
some water, Faith?� He asked pleasantly, ignoring her pleas.

�� How did you know
I was thirsty?� She asked in wonder, taking the glass and drinking deeply.

�� We are all
connected here; of course I would know that Noah is thirsty,� he responded
lightly. Faith finished off the glass, and the world began to spin. She was so
dizzy.

�� I feel a bit
dizzy. Earl, can you carry me to the bed?� She asked. He pulled her gently into
his arms and fulfilled her request. As she lay down, a wave of fatigue washed
over her. �I�m so tired�� she mumbled, her eyes drooping. She blinked, trying
to stay awake, but suddenly her eyes were closed.

---

�� The first thing
Faith saw was Sarah sitting next to her, smiling serenely and running her hands
through the ancient girl�s hair.

�� Sarah,� she said,
smiling. She hadn�t dreamt of her in a while. Looking around, she noticed all
her fallen kin. They all stood, smiling just as serenely as Sarah, and Faith
thought they looked very glad to see her.

�� Faith,� she said,
and the rest of them all echoed her. �It has been a long time since we�ve last
spoken. I�ve missed you.�

�� Me too,� Faith
said, wrapping her arms around the older, blonde girl.

�� We have much to
talk about,� Cyril said, coming to hug Faith as well. The rest of her kin followed
suit, and soon they were a large mass of Noah, all hugging and smiling. Faith�s
heart swelled. She had missed them all.

�� This is a nice
dream,� Faith said, drinking in the sight before her. All of her family�each
member so important to her�and they were here. With her.
It could only be a dream. They were all dead, especially Sarah.

�� This isn�t a
dream, sweetie,� Sarah said softly, hugging Faith again. �We�re all here with
you.�

�� That�s just what
my dream would tell me,� Faith said, sobering a little. Still, she couldn�t
help but enjoy their company.

---

October 4, 2013�Allen�s Ark

�� Emiko walked out
into the sunlight of Allen�s Ark�s Main Plaza. She had been avoiding her duties
after Choon-yei�s funeral, but she needed to get back to them, and since they
had nothing else to do, she decided to help train the soldiers who were
trickling slowly in. They wouldn�t all be replenished for a few more days, but
Emiko knew they all needed training right away.

�� Her pants felt
strange and loose, far too comfortable. She hadn�t worn such loose, relaxed
clothes since she was a child. She found she missed them, even if they were
Chu-chan�s. She had a point to make to Vikram today.
She was Emiko, she was Sasaki�she was them both. No matter what form she was
in, she was who she was, and she could never go back to a younger version of
herself.

�� Tying her hair
into a low ponytail, she turned to face her small group of soldiers.

�� Okay, troops, you
all are inexperienced at fighting, and I�m here to make you better. We have a
few main rules here in the Order: follow the orders of any Exorcist, run if
they tell you to, don�t fight anything higher than a Level Two Akuma, and don�t
get hit by Akuma bullets,� she said, facing each one of them in turn. They all
nodded emphatically, and Emiko didn�t know whether that was caused by fear or
by a thirst to prove themselves. She fervently hoped
it was fear. Perhaps it would keep them alive a good time longer.

�� Also, you�re all
going to die, so if you want to leave, we won�t blame you. There�s one hour in
the night that absolutely no one is awake for. If you disappear, well, maybe an
Akuma got you?�

�� It had been
Allen�s idea. Allowing the soldiers the possibility of
escape, of a life, seemed very important to him. They hadn�t had a choice,
and Allen wanted the soldiers to have one. Not many of them took that option,
but none of the Exorcists ever blamed the ones who did. Except Kanda, but Emiko
thought that he was only angry that he couldn�t take the same exit. Or perhaps,
Kanda just hated deserters. Emiko shrugged infinitesimally to herself and
continued staring down the line of fresh soldiers.

�� She took a double
take at the presence of a Japanese soldier, but she moved on, not giving the
young man a second thought.

�� Alright, then, drop
into push-up position, and give me twenty,� she ordered.

�� Emiko?�
Said a very familiar deep voice from behind her, and she looked around to see
Vikram standing there.

�� Yes?� She asked
archly.

�� Why aren�t you in
drag?� Short and sweet and to the point. Just like
Vikram. Emiko felt her anger melt away. She just couldn�t stay upset at Vikram,
no matter how much he annoyed and hurt her.

�� It�s to prove a
point, if you must know,� she replied haughtily, turning from him to face her
soldiers again.

�� What?� Vikram
sounded both hurt and confused, but Emiko couldn�t make herself care. He
deserved at least a little snub.

�� What are you
pansies doing? Backs straight, ladies!� Emiko barked
in an unladylike fashion. The soldiers stared at her angrily, but she ignored
it, instead kicking people into the proper position. She stomped on the head of
the Japanese kid as she passed him.

�� Don�t talk,� she
said. �And your head�s too high. What�s your name and rank?�

�� Morikawa Hiroshi,
Private First Class,� the boy responded, and Emiko lost her balance, driving
the boy�s face into the cobblestones as she fell.

�� Hiro-chan?�
She asked incredulously. She took the boy�s face in her hands and stared
intensely into his eyes. They were the exact same brown, and there was that freckle
beneath his eye, the one hidden by his eyelashes. Though his jaw was stronger
and his shoulders had broadened, there was no denying that this was Hiroshi.
Her dearest itouto, Hiro-chan. Tears
filled her eyes.

�� Sa�sa-nii-chan?� Hiro-chan asked, his voice breathless and disbelieving. His eyes were
widened with acute wonder.

�� Is that really
you, Hiro-chan?� Emiko asked, patting the boy�s face in incredulity. Why the
hell was her younger brother here? Japan was the biggest pacifist country she�d
ever known. The only time they had sided in a war was in World War Two, when
the Germans had come, asking for a favor. Japan had owed them for rebuilding
their country after the Earl destroyed it, and so they had joined the war on
the Axis�s side. But beside that, Japan had remained completely neutral in
every other event.

�� Sasa-nii-chan?� Hiro-chan looked as if he had seen a
ghost.

�� Of course,� Emiko
said. Hiro-chan turned and stared at the others, who were all on their hands
and knees, slacking on their push-ups.

�� Hey, guys, is
there a guy here, in front of me, calling me Hiro-chan?� He asked, and a few of
the other soldiers snickered.

�� Course,
mate. That�s Emiko. Don�t know why she�s not dressed all girly today,
though,� said one who had been with them since September. He had been put in
charge of this group of soldiers.

�� Emiko?�
Hiro-chan asked blankly, turning around and staring Emiko straight in the eyes.
�Sasa-nii-chan, what are they talking about?�

�� Emiko opened and
closed her mouth a few times, floundering as she tried to think of a way to
explain this change. After all, she�d been a guy when she�d been taken from
home. �The war changes people. It�s how I cope,� she said, looking away. It was
an utterly incomplete explanation, and there was nearly no truth to it.

�� I don�t
understand,� Hiro-chan said, and his face scrunched up in that cute confused
look he only gave her. She resisted the urge to hug him. She had forgotten how
adorable her little brother had been.

�� Yeah, why are you
dressed like a guy, Major Emiko?� The oldest soldier asked.

�� Because I am
one,� she said absently, still looking at her younger brother with something
akin to awe. He really had grown.

�� I still don�t
understand,� Hiro-chan reiterated. �You�re� dead.�

�� Emiko shook her
head sadly. �I never died. I just disappeared for a while. When I returned, the
Order thought it a courtesy not to inform you.�

�� Okaa-san cries every time you�re mentioned!
She locks herself in her room on your birthday! She hasn�t been the same since
you left, and when you died, she nearly cut herself off from the world!�
Hiro-chan yelled, and Emiko thought she saw tears swimming in his eyes.

�� I was kidnapped,
okay? And when I was returned seven months later, I thought I was a girl! I can�t see myself as a boy anymore, and I haven�t been Sasaki since�not the Sasaki everyone remembers.
I�m a broken person�Okaa-san doesn�t need to see that. Otou-san, either,� Emiko yelled back,
and womanly tears fell from her eyes.

�� It�d still be
good to know you�re alive, Sasa-nii! How did you
think I felt when I heard my nii-chan
got killed in war when he was seven!�

�� Probably
really shitty! But that�s nothing compared to what I felt, so shut up,
Hiro-chan! I just want to forget about it!� Emiko pounded a fist into the ground.
Her voice had gone lower, lower than it had ever been before. She knew
instinctively that it was resting at what would be its normal pitch. She didn�t
like it. It reminded her of unpleasant, unladylike things. And it made her
swear.

�� Hiro-chan sniveled
a little, but he didn�t shout back. Obviously, he realized Emiko wasn�t going
to change her mind.

�� It�s okay,� he
said slowly after a while, �instead of a nii-chan,
I have a nee-chan.�

�� Emiko smiled
humorlessly. �Don�t tell Okaa-san and Otou-san, ne?�

�� Why
not? They should know you�re alive, at least,� Hiro-chan said.

�� Because
I�m probably going to die anyway! And you, too! You�re dead! Go home.
Take the hour opportunity, because otherwise you�re going to die, and I
couldn�t live with myself if I let it happen,� Emiko exclaimed, though she kept
her voice low. Hiro-chan looked troubled.

�� I can�t do that,�
he said quietly.

�� I don�t care if
you can�t. Go home to everyone. They
shouldn�t have to suffer through two children dying. Mimi-chan�s
still too young to enlist, right?� Hiroshi was bad enough, but if her little
sister who had been born just months before she�d left got involved in the war,
Emiko didn�t know what she�d do.

�� Mimi�s nearly
eighteen. She�s planning on going to college, though,� Hiro-chan said, and
Emiko relaxed.

�� Thank goodness,�
she sighed, a smile breaking out on her face. �If you aren�t going to leave,
well� I couldn�t live with her death on my hands, too.�

�� I�m still telling
them you�re alive, Sasa-nii-chan,� Hiro-chan said,
pulling a phone from his army uniform�s pocket.

�� No!� Emiko
shouted, panicked, and she batted a hand out, slapping it to the ground.
Activating her Innocence, she invoked its second level and threw a
green-glowing, gray shuriken at it. It snapped neatly in two, and Emiko
immediately felt relieved. Her heartbeat was already beginning to slow from the
abrupt adrenaline rush.

�� What the hell was
that for, Sasaki?� Her little brother shouted, outraged.

�� They can�t know
I�m alive, okay? If they do, they�ll just end up losing me again! I�m lucky
I�ve made it this far! General Green is already gone, as are two of the others,
and they�re supposed to be the strongest of us. I�ve lost so many comrades, but
the Innocence can always find another host, and it does. I�ve seen so many
people die in this war, Finders and Exorcists alike, and I don�t want to give
everyone hope that I may come out of this, because I know I won�t.� Emiko burst
into tears and ran off. She didn�t know where he was, but she needed Vikram.

�� She ran to his
room in the Ark but didn�t see him there. Tears blinded her as she pounded
frantically down the unfamiliar hallways of the Main Branch. She threw open
random doors, one time walking in on two very tear-blurred people doing
something on a bed, until she found the still depressed-looking Indian boy.

�� Vikram!�
She shouted desperately, and she threw herself into his arms, surprising him.
They fell back so that she was on top of him, but he wrapped his arms around
her nonetheless. She sobbed hard into his shoulder, clutching at the fabric of
his Exorcist jacket.

�� E-Emiko?
What�s wrong?� Vikram asked, his voice shocked and worried. Emiko could only
let her body buck with the force of her cries.

�� I-I can�t let
h-h-him stay h-here!� She wailed, pulling herself even closer. Vikram froze and
shifted his weight a moment later. It felt like he was pulling away, and Emiko
couldn�t stand that.

�� Wait, what are we
talking about, Emi?� He sounded bewildered. Stifling tears, she explained what
had just come to pass.

�� So your brother
is here?� He asked, and for some reason, his breathing was getting slightly
ragged. Emiko wondered what was wrong with him, but she couldn�t concentrate on
that. She just needed to be near him. Even if he would never
feel the same way.

�� Nn.� She
nodded into his chest.

�� Hey, Emiko, it�s
okay. He won�t tell your parents�I�ll make sure of it, okay?� He reassured her
quietly, running his hands up and down her back. She nodded again, and he
shifted once more. She clung tighter. �So� why are you dressing like a guy
again?� He asked after a while.

�� I� I just wanted
to show you that I�m the same person no matter how I dress,� she said sadly,
shaking her head. Laughing humorlessly, she added, �not that you seemed to
notice.�

�� Vikram stirred
again. �I noticed,� he said, and his voice was strangled. She lifted her head
to look into his eyes, and she noticed they had darkened a bit.

�� You did?� She
asked softly, almost pitifully. Her voice was high-pitched again, and it was
very, very small.

�� Of course,� he
said, looking away. He still spoke in that strangled voice,
and Emiko wondered what was wrong with him.

�� What�s wrong
with�� she started, adjusting herself so that she was sitting on his stomach.
His eyes widened, and he pushed her off abruptly, running from the room.

�� Sorry,
Emi! I have to pee!�

�� Emiko watched him
leave, completely mystified. She left the room soon afterward, following his
route to the bathroom. When she entered, she heard a gasping moan and stopped
in her tracks. Oh, she thought. I get it. She made a hasty retreat back
to Vikram�s room, feeling quite pleased with herself. Maybe there was hope
after all.

---

October 10, 2013�Noah�s Ark,
Faith�s Room

�� Faith couldn�t
wake up. She didn�t know how long she�d been asleep, but she knew it had been a
while, and it had to stop. She wasn�t sleepy anymore. She just wanted to wake
up, talk to Road, have fun, and forget. Being with all her fallen kin was nice.
They were kind to her, and they all spent a good time together, but Faith knew
it wasn�t real, and she needed to get out of here. She couldn�t feel either
Road or Chaz, and though the bonds were still weak, she should have been able
to feel them. Somehow, the bonds hadn�t gone away completely when Jasdevi was killed, and she wondered if she had
unconsciously left some of them inside of her, just in case. A
contingency plan, so to speak, in case they were killed like Sarah had been.
It seemed likely.

�� Still, she
couldn�t wake up, and she needed to. She needed to stop the Earl from doing the
horrible thing that must never be done. She needed to stop the plan before it
happened, and for that she needed to wake up.

�� She felt something
strange in her arm, something flowing into her. IV, she thought. It needed to be gone, because it was drugging her,
keeping her under. Why had the Earl
drugged her? Had he really been lost to her? This was� troubling. If he was no
longer under any sort of restraining control, he would never stop. He would
destroy everything, and he would do it with that horrible thing that must never
be done.

�� The first thing
that needed to happen was restoring the bonds, and Faith had a sinking feeling
that they were being hidden by the needle pumping drugs into her arm. If she
could only get rid of that, then perhaps she could wake herself up. Elizabeth
could heal her, she just needed to reach her older
sister.

�� Maybe if I dream myself doing it, the IV
will come out in real life, too, Faith thought. Road had been able to do
similar things, even before she had awakened, and Faith knew that if she only
forced it, perhaps she could actually pull it out.

�� She imagined
herself doing it, putting all of her will into the thoughts. She pictured
herself reaching her right hand over and ripping the tape away. She made her
picture-self pull the needle from her arm very carefully so as to not spill
much blood. Suddenly, everything was clearer. Had she done it?

�� Elizabeth! She called, and she felt the
older woman�s presence.

�� Let me heal you, she said, and Faith
felt the grip of the drugs loosen. Her eyes fluttered, and suddenly, she was
back in her brightly-lit room, and there was an IV stand
fallen on the floor, the concoction seeping from the needle and onto the tiles.

�� She felt around
for her brethren. There, on a very, very weak thread, was the Earl, and next to
him was Sarah�s severed bond. Next was Road�s, and it was very strong. She
pulled on it lightly, calling her favorite sister to her silently. She
inspected the others. Jasdevi�s was still broken, but
it felt strong nonetheless, and Faith was mystified.

�� Faith!� Road bawled, slamming an
ornate door open as she entered the Middle Eastern girl�s room.

�� Road!� Faith
shouted, alarmed. Road never cried. Not real tears. Not these tears. �What�s
wrong? Come here, tell me!� She opened her arms up, and Road ran into them.
Gently, Faith encircled the other girl in her strong but gentle grasp, rubbing
small, light circles on her back.

�� It�s horrible.
Faith, you need to see this.� She
looked deeply into Faith�s eyes, and some sort of resolve hardened them. �I�m
so sorry.� Tears pouring down her face, Road pulled back, placing a hand on
Faith�s chest and another on the Middle Eastern girl�s forehead. Faith gasped
as Road�s mind pushed its way into hers. The images she saw horrified her. As Road
eased back out of her mind and into her own body, Faith stared intensely into
her sister�s eyes.

�� We need to stop
this,� she said urgently, grabbing Road�s forearms in a firm hold. �I need my
Heart.�

---

A/N: Thus begins our two-week hiatus. We�ll be back at the end of the
semester, hopefully with Innocent Rain completely finished. This will allow us
to edit and post the rest of the chapters over the summer, and if we don�t
manage to do that, we�ll attempt to write over the summer (which will be a very
painstaking, back-and-forth process that already makes us die of tediousness).
We are rooming with each other next year (it�s gonna be epic), so if we don�t
finish over the summer (and run out of chapters to post), we�ll write as soon
as we get back.
- 18
- 19
- 20
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Innocent Rain