What Counts...

~*~
Someone was knocking on my window. To be honest it scared the hell out of me.
“You are coming home with ME.” Sakaki stated as he ripped the door open and unbuckled my belt, dragging me out of my car, shutting off the iion.ion. I felt blurry. Fuck…I had left my car running in the garage….I had fallen asleep? Shit. This must look bad. But I was too blurry to protest, and I was sporting a horrible headache. Wait, no I wasn’t. I knew I was weaving on my feet, the garage was spinning and I though I was going to be sick.
“I am FINE.” I growled, then proceeded to puke violently, nearly on Sakaki’s shoes. Dammit. Why did my body always have to betray me?! Seething. Oh god yes I was.
Sakaki simply grabbed me by the coat and dragged me out of the garage and onto the front lawn, shoving me hard enough to make me sit down.
“You need fresh air.” He stated.
“I am FINE.” I persisted. Part of me knew that Sakaki already KNEW I wasn’t fine, but the other, more stubborn part did not want to risk looking weak. Weak people this world chewed up and spit out. I could not be weak. I was part witch. If I gave up even more of my right to life and my own personhood due to what crawled in my veins, I would be nothing. Easy pickings… I was a witch, or going to be. I took fast little breaths of the frigid night air, finding that it calmed my stomach.
“Jesus Amon, what the fucking hell is wrong with you.” Sakaki growled.
“What indeed.” I muttered before collapsing back to the grass. I just wanted to sleep, and If I had to do it in the dirt and grass of the main courtyard, I was going to do it.
“Don’t you dare go to sleep.” Sakaki lectured.
I opened one bloodshot eye. There were three of him.
“Leave me alone.” I growled, then had another flashback of Robin’s face even as I said the words; ‘don’t touch me’ I heard her say…the betrayal.
“Amon…fuck.” Sakaki had his arms around my waist, and then was hoisting me over his shoulder. Sakaki was not big, compared to me at least, how he could pick me up was a matter of a miracle. A big part of me wanted to protest. Outwardly I might have slurred something like ‘fuck you put me down.’ But I eventually gave in. I actually found I could sort of think better upside down. Maybe it was oxygen finally getting to my starved brain.

~*~
I woke up lopped over someone’s couch. Whose, I would guess one of three people. I groaned as I sat up.
“Oh, you’re awake.” A cheerful voice called from another room.
“Sakaki!” I groaned. “Why am I on your couch…and more importantly how?!”
“I brought you here when you passed out on me.
“I passed out?” I asked, sitting forward and clutching my head.
“I called the STNJ doc. He came to look at you and said your oxygen saturation levels were returning to normal even as he examined you, then he gave you a shot and was on his merry way.”
Oh. So that was why my arm hurt.
“Why! Did you not consult me on this first.” I growled, feeling somehow violated.
“Because an unconscious and unresponsive man cannot argue.”
His logic was flawless, but why did that still piss me off?
“So…do you want some coffee?” he asked.
“What the hell time is it?”
“Noon.”
“NOON!” I thundered and tried to jump up. My body however would have none of it. For some reason my knees were wobbly and I felt too heavy to continue standing. I collapsed gracelessly back onto the couch with a curse.
“Don’t try to move so fast, the doc sedated you so you could get some sleep. He told me he would report us for abusing our employee’s if I didn’t let him sedate you. Sorry about that!”
I gritted my teeth, trying to not let my anger get the better of me…but the couch was comfortable…and I was so sleepy…and warm. My feet hung well over the end of the couch, and my head was on the arm rest, and I didn’t care. The couch felt obscenely comfortable, and I figured it must be the sedative.
“Did you call me in?!” I groaned, feeling the defeat start.
“Yeah, the big man upstairs gave us all a day off since we have all been busting our asses on this case the last few days. That and I think the STNJ doc probably got a hold of him. He proclaimed me unfit for duty due to exhaustion as well…I protested, but he wouldn’t have any of it. I am starting to think he is right.”
I resisted the urge to slap my palm to my forehead. Right now it just sounded like too much work.
“Even Michael…” Sakaki continued. “Sleeping under his desk like a sad little puppy when the man upstairs came to question him about something. If that insomniac finally dropped, I hate to think about the rest of us reallnd Ind I have proof snoring on my couch.” He stated blandly.
“Keh. Not asleep.” I grinched.
“Then want some coffee?”
“Sure.” I acquiesced. Coffee did sound good. “So…” I asked to the sound of movement in the kitchen. “Are you ever coming out here, or do we have to shout back and forth between rooms?”
“I didn’t want to be in strangling reach when I told you about the doctor.”
“I think you are safe now.” I replied drolly.
“Oh no I am not…when you tell me it ISNT safe, then I will know it IS safe to come out there. When you lie it’s just scary.”
I sighed. This was going to be a long day.
“So…Sakaki…how did I get here…I know it couldn’t have been by bike?”
“Oh…aherm.” Sakaki cleared his throat nervously. IsortofborrowedyourcaritsparkedoutfrontIpromiseIdidn’tscratch it.”
Why? I wondered as I closed my eyes against the annoying afternoon sunshine.

~*~
The cups of coffee sat between us as we faced each other uneasily.
“So…I never got the official report. What the hell happened out there?”
Wow. No foreplay. I forced myself not to growl
“The witch was between us when I fired. It went through, Robin didn’t shield. Maybe She thought the bullet wouldn’t go all the way through. I don’t know, but, regardless, the witch has on his knees when I took the shot, because it went through it took Robin in the gut.” I kept my voice neutral, toneless. I was giving a report, emotion was unnecessary
“Why would Robin not shield?” Sakaki asked, like, why would the sun not come up, why would the world not turn? Why would Robin not shield. Indeed.
“Because.” I said, my voice holding a small tremor of sorrow that I could not contain.
“She trusted me.”
Sakaki wisely said nothing, but his eyes looked sad for me, as though he just realized the truth. I gave him a look that said that I did not want pity.
“Sugar?” He asked, proffering a packet.
I nodded.
My fingers accidentally brushed his as we passed it, and it made a little trill of /something/ run up my spine.
“Amon.” He whispered.
“Don’t! say it.” I discouraged.
“Someone has to!” Sakaki snapped.
I gave him my best death glare.
He was far from cowed. Dammit.
Just then, the phone rang, sparing me a great deal of unwanted human interaction. Why was my heart pounding in my chest like that, why? Sakaki stood and with a tiny tilt of his head that indicated I had won my reprieve, and vanished into the kitchen in response to the shrilling summons. I just stared at the steam coming off of his coffee cup. It was vaguely fascinating in a way that made me wonder if I was still impaired from the injection I had received. Sleep still sounded wonderful. Maybe that was it.
I heard Sakaki lower his voice, and then the sound of a one sided argument that would have been amusing if I hadn’t been certain it was me he and the mysterious other caller were discussing.
“I will tell him, but he’s not going to like it…yes…yes.”

When Sakaki returned, he had a hunch in the muscles of his left shoulder, something I noticed happened when he was tense about dealing with something.
“Spill it.” I said, not waiting.
He obliged me.

~*~
“Inot not want to do this.” I argued with him.
“She wants to see you, and I dare say you need to see her!” He interjected.
“I do not.” I said, my tone pure ice.
“Cut the crap Amon.” He snapped. “I will blackmail you if I have to.”
So he knew some of my secrets, there was nothing that he could really do, I mean, what did he know. And then it hit me as we rolled up to the hospital, Sakaki parking my car right next to Doujima’s. She was sitting there, waiting, most likely for us.
Sakaki rolled the window down even as Doujima got out of her car.
“Hey Doujima, did I ever tell you about the time that Amon…”
“All right!” I snapped, cutting him off, much to his amusement. “I will go.”
“What about Amon?” Doujiman asked cluelessly, her eyes sparkled though, she had caught on to the game. With friends like this, who the hell needs enemies?

~*~

Even Michael had been granted a little slack in his leash to come see Robin. He and Karasuma huddled outside the door, waiting. They blinked in surprise and relief as they saw me. They both beamed at me like proud parents. It made me want to put ex-lax in their coffee. Now there was a solid idea. Soon they were ushering me into the room, it nearly took all four of them bodily shoving me, for some reason my knees did not seem to want to move. I would have kept balking and probably struggled forever if it were for Sakaki touching my arm, it sent a little tiny trill of comfort to my stomach and nerve endings and back again. I could move. It was all right.

~*~
She made a little mewling sound of surprise when she saw me. She was pale and had inherited more than one IV, her skin was so white that she nearly matched the color of the sheet she lay on. Her green eyes were wide, I watched her brace herself against her pain, and watched it shimmer from her eyes to be replaced with a genuine gladness to see me.
“Amon.” She croaked. Her voice rough from the intubation and her surgery. I was drawn to her side, slowly, inexorably, as though I could not resist the call of her gaze. I wanted to turn and leave, the guilt was bubbling into a knot of tight pain in my stomach that made start to shake. I wanted to be strong, but how could I when there was such forgiveness in her eyes. I moved almost against my will and perched on the edge of her cot, my hand cupping her cheek.
“I am sorry.” I whispered. I could feel the shake in my arm, I was just helpless to stop it, and it made me grit my teeth in frustration.
“There is nothing to be sorry for, this was an accident, they are coming to unhook me from my dance partners and send me back to do paperwork in an hour or so, Michael, Karasuma and Doujima are going to take turns looking after me. I will be fine.” She whispered, it was obvious though that speaking had made her weary. She turned her face into my palm and nuzzled once, the gesture one of comfort that made my stomach clench. I did not need her sympathy. I check that train of thought though when I realized I had thought it. She had MY sympathy, and that was why I felt so angry. It was something I just naturally did not like. A hunter had no sympathy for a witch…but this was my witch. My partner, my beautiful, talented, gentle and terrifyingly powerful lioness of a partner. Mine. Was that why my heart hurt so? I wanted to claim her as mine, but knew, that like a trapped butterfly, she would only fade and die if I held too tightly? Her eyes softened as she watched my face, it was all playing out in my eyes.
“I understand.” She said lowly, so soft that there was no doubt it was meant to pass up the waiting ears outside the door. “I really do.” She said. “Now get out of here before you get any more flustered and faint. If I end up having to share a room with you here I will be very upset.” She emphasized the /very/. Her eyes flashed a bit with her underlying strength, and it made me feel a little better. Robin was going to be ok. Really ok. But what about me? Robin knew that this had to be hard for me, on more levels than one, she had just said as much. But what was I to do?
“Get some rest.” She instructed me sagely. Wait, she can read minds too? Now I was in trouble. “You look like…me” She said the ‘me’ with a raise of her eyebrows. I was saved by the doctor then, he dismissed me with a wave of his hand, and I was forced to relinquish my touch, forced to leave her. I found myself unconsciously promising her I would rest, and that everything was well even as I found myself in the bright lights of the hall again. They were all looking at me with that penny-bright wide-eyed stare that only busy body matchmaker wannabe’s get.
“What?!” I demanded aloud, my voice a growl. All of them were amusedly cowed except for Sakaki, who tugged my sleeve as I plowed by him, my hand’s in the pockets of my trench coat and my head down under the vile florescent lighting in the hallway that all hospitals seemed to have. He feel into step just behind me, saying nothing, his worried and silent presence made me want to lash out at him, the other part wanted to cling to him and cry. Since as Amon, I had several duties, one being to Never A: Cry and B: Cling, I found that I could not oblige him and instead was forced to focus on wanting to lash out.

~*~
I said nothing on the car ride home. I said nothing as we walked up the stairs. I said nothing as I disappeared into the bathroom of his apartment to take a shower that I had not asked permis to to take. Vengeance, or at least several hours with icy shower water, was mine.

~*~

A/n: Errr...This has been kind of wishy washy, hope to firm it up a little more soon, look for the next chapter, and as for Boing, you always knew this story was for you ^_^ Thanks to everyone for reading.