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The Spaces Between Us	By : zoni Category: > Black Butler (Kuroshitsuji ???) Views: 2761 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Kuroshitsuji and do not profit from my fan fiction.

Chapter List
- 1-Chapter One
- 2-Chapter Two
- 1
- 2
Chapter Two

Sebastian tastes like hot cider; his sweetness and bitterness drowned in a sea of spices. His mouth against mine feels warm, bordering on hot as he presses back into the kiss. There is no hesitation, no second thought. I can feel his lips moving against mine with every bit as much of the determination that I am putting into the caress. Never before have I dared to do such a thing. I have never kissed him, or any man, or even thoroughly considered the possibility. If it is awkward or unwieldy, I do not notice. Sliding my hand up from his shoulder to his wrist, I lean closer to him as I taste his lips.

Even though I am the one pushing him back into the wall and holding him there with my hand on his wrist and my body leaning against his own, it is he who has me captivated. As I devour his mouth, he takes over my senses. Sebastian is all that I can smell, taste and feel in the air around me. He is the only thing that occupies my mind. Everything else has been blurred entirely out of my reality. He is like a sweet poison, winding his way through my veins and driving me to temptation. All of the tension and frustration that I have felt through the day is poured into the roughness of the kiss as my tongue drags against his.

  By the time I break the kiss, I am panting heavily. The arm that I am not using to hold his wrist is pressed against the wall, framing his face as I lean my weight forward and look him directly in the eye. I have never been this close to Sebastian, so near to him that I can taste his breath. Leaning towards his face, I will my heart to stop its ridiculous pounding as I catch my breath. He is watching me. Some unknown emotion is very clearly visible in his eyes; hunger, perhaps, though not the sort that should probably frighten me. This hunger is far more terrifying. The edge of his tongue runs across the edge of his lips, white fangs visible behind them as parts them slightly.

  All of the tension that I felt earlier is gone. It has been replaced by a very different kind of tension altogether. A force that I have never known pulls me towards him, like a magnet. Staring into his dark eyes, I realize that I want him as I have wanted no one before. The only thing that I want to do right now is to lean back in and taste him once more. At the moment, even that might not be enough to satisfy this sudden desire that he has woken in me. I swallow, hard, pushing away all of the thoughts that come flooding to mind as I consider the possibility. Even though the air is cold in my mansion, right now it feels as hot as an oven. A drop of sweat winds its way down the back of my neck. Does Sebastian know that he has this effect on me? Does he know the things that he is making me consider?

  "Young master..." Sebastian murmurs. In those simple words, I have my answer. He knows. He knows, and he is very much enjoying the effect he has on me.

  Every ounce of willpower I possess is summoned as I lean back and pull myself away from him. My hand on his wrist slides further up, drifting over his gloves until my hand wraps around the cool metal of the candelabrum. His eyes burn into me for a lasting second before I finally pull myself away. Turning, I walk down the hall and leave behind all of the heat that had overcome me the very moment that our lips touched.

The house is empty and silent as I wander the halls. There is no specific destination that I have in mind, only one that I want very much to avoid. Returning to my bedroom, to Lizzy, would be reckless and irresponsible. I do not want to see her when I can still taste Sebastian on my tongue. Without really meaning to, I find myself standing in the library. I do not know if this is where I wanted to come, or if it is simply convenient and isolated. Setting the lamp on a table, I sink into one of the plush living chairs that occupy the room and try to comprehend what I have just done.

  "Sebastian." His name leaves my lips as light as air. Even here in the darkness, with half the house between him and me, I can still feel that same draw to him. Never before have I felt any such connection to anyone. I doubt that it has anything to do with our contract. It is just the way he is. Reaching up with one hand, I let the tips of my fingers brush across my lips. Even though moments have passed, I can still feel his touch as though that heated kiss had just ended. I kissed him. More than that, I had wanted to do so. Were he here right now, I would probably do so again if the opportunity presented itself.

  Even so, I could hardly call that contact a kiss, for the word does not even merit the feeling behind it. Never before have I felt such heat or desire the way that I did when I felt him moving with me. Even the recollection of him whispering his preferred pet title for me is enough to send a slight shiver down my back. Kissing Lizzy has never felt like that. With her, it has never made me want more in the way that he has done, even if I do not know exactly what more I might want.

There is no feeling of regret as my mind replays every second of the caress. However, I am not happy with myself. There are any number of reasons why. It is improper, immoral and offensive to my well-bred mind and all of the many rules of our strict society with which I have been raised. All of the reasons are flimsy and farcical when compared against my own ideals. I know that I have no moral objection to what I have just done. The problem that I have is one of my own self-restraint. I dislike the fact that he was able to push me past the point of my own control so very thoroughly and in such a short space of time. I dislike it, but I cannot deny the fact that I have been fighting this desire for longer than I would care to consider. I want him. Pandora's box has been opened.

Sitting here for the rest of the night will solve nothing. Slowly, I get to my feet and once more pick up the candlestick. Making my way to one of the guest bedrooms that occupies the second floor, I collapse on top of the bed and allow myself to sleep.
"Young master."

The world comes slowly into focus as the sound of Sebastian's voice pulls me out of my dark dreams. The shadowed images of long-forgotten dungeons and rusting cages fades into the bright light of day that streams in through the open windows. A light breeze blows in off the lawn. Everything seems surreal and light as I turn over, trying to escape from the brightness that has started to draw me back to consciousness. This seems terribly familiar to me, like how Sebastian would wake me before I was married. I do not want to wake up yet, not when I have had so very little rest.

  A warm hand rests itself lightly on the shoulder of my dressing gown, tugging slightly at the fabric. In an instant, I am awake as I realize that Sebastian is touching my shoulder. Turning over, I sit up so quickly that so quickly that my head spins. "Sebastian, what the-"

  "I am very sorry to wake you, young master," he says, stepping away politely. "However, I thought that I should probably rouse you so that you would not be late for your business meeting later in the day."

I will the room to stop spinning as I reach up and press my left hand to the eye that is left uncovered by the white bandages, wiping the remnants of sleep away. Blinking blearily towards the demon, I look up at Sebastian. Memories from the night before come flooding back. All that I want to do is just turn over and bury my face in the blankets once more. Mornings after I have spent a night thinking of Sebastian are always awkward, though I have never had to face one before in which he has been completely aware of the fact that he is on my mind. Looking at him now, the slight hint of a smirk that plays across his lips is the only sign that something less than professional might be occupying his mind. For now, I will choose to ignore both that smirk and my own thoughts. Sighing heavily, I ask, "What time is it?"

"Half past nine o'clock in the morning. Your meeting with Mr. Brown is scheduled for twelve-thirty and there are some papers that you will need to see to beforehand."

  "Very well," I tell him. "I am ready for my bath, then."

When Lizzy and I were married, we decided that we would use the master bedroom that my parents had occupied before their deaths. Until my marriage, that bedroom had been kept clean and well decorated, but it had never been used. While my wife and I use that room as our own, we each maintain separate bathrooms for our own particular use. She and I have vastly different preferences when it comes to our daily routines. This was the easiest way to accommodate us both, and it is somewhat expected of people of our status. We are wealthy enough to maintain our own apartments within the mansion and sometimes do.

  My own is the old bedroom that I used before the wedding. That room is the same one that I have slept in since I was a child. I have changed the decor a little. The yellow wallpaper has been replaced with a more somber dark blue that has trailing patterns of abstract vines weaving through the coloring. The change in decoration was done out of necessity after a rather bad bloodstain wound up on one wall when I was seventeen. The bathroom has since been redone in a similar style, though the coloring in here is much lighter. Many changes have been made when it comes to the house's appointments and furnishings, especially where the plumbing is concerned. Within the past seven years, I have had boilers installed so that we might have hot water rather than having to run buckets of it from the kitchen.

From what I have seen of his activities, Sebastian appreciates the innovation. As we both walk into the bathroom, he starts the water, letting it run just slightly hotter than I prefer. He has perfected the art of timing the bath so that it will be the ideal temperature by the time I actually step into the water. There is more to do before I actually bathe, though, now that I am an adult. Removing my dressing jacket, I ready myself to go through the morning routine.

  Moving over to a wooden chair by the wall, I turn the back of it towards the center of the room and take a seat. Sebastian walks over to me and undoes the bandages that cover my right eye. There is no need to cover it when he and I are alone. After all, he is the very reason that the seal exists.

  Using one of the silver brushes that we keep in the room, he runs the bristles through my hair. My hair is longer than I kept it when I was a child. The slate strands now hang just past my jaw, even though I usually wear them tied back. My fringe hangs over my face, never long enough to pin back and never short enough to keep tidy. The right side of it is normally used to hide my eye patch from view, though it is not nearly as easy to maintain as it was when I was younger. I enjoy having my hair this length. Sebastian has referred to it as fashionably unfashionable. Lizzy and Aunt Frances both call it offensive. I do not care what their opinions are. I refuse to wear my hair short as my father did. My father did an excellent job as the head of the Phantomhive family, but he and I are not the same man. I intend to let others see that through my appearance as well as through my actions. If my hair were short, I would look almost identical to my predecessor. The only differences that I can find are our eyes. Even though my features have matured with age, my eyes are still unusually large; a fact that I have never managed to escape.

When he finishes with my hair, he sets about shaving the stubble from my jaw. Through all of this, he says nothing. I am slightly surprised by that fact. Sebastian has rarely missed an opportunity to tease me or place me in a position where I might feel slightly uncomfortable. That is even truer if said position somehow happens to involve him. The fact that he has not so much as mentioned what happened last night worries me. Yet, this morning seems no different from any other. It is simply a routine that we have gone through countless times before.

  Once he has finished with my shaving, I can feel Sebastian's fingertips on my neck through the fabric of my nightshirt. Nothing is different today from any other as he begins to undo the buttons at my collar so that he will be able to remove the garment. He is always careful, never brushing my skin more than he has to with his own. His gloves have already been removed. They have been carefully stowed away in the inner pocket of his tailcoat that now hangs on the back of the bathroom door. Even though everything is the same, I am too aware of details that I have never noticed before. I can feel the way that his fingertips catch on the fabric and pull the shirt open a little at a time as he moves further down the garment. Every movement is graceful and casual, as though it is being done without thought. However, I can still see the unusually soft smile that he is wearing as he goes about his work. For some time, I have suspected that Sebastian enjoys doing this more than he probably should. Right now, I am absolutely certain of it.

Even though I am quickly becoming aware of the fact that he is enjoying undressing me, I try to act as though I neither notice nor care. After all, for the past two months, Sebastian and I have barely spoken to one another more than is absolutely necessary. I do not know how the actions of last night will change the way that he and I have become. On any other day, I would be forcibly looking away from him and barely tolerating his touch as I wait for him to finish bathing me. Sebastian does not seem to notice that I have not looked away from him today. Try though I might, I cannot account for why I have not. I only know that the feeling of unease and nervousness that I usually experience on mornings after nights filled with thoughts of him is gone. In this moment, I am completely comfortable with having him undress me. Today, it feels almost as if we have returned to the days long before my marriage to Lizzy.

The fact that I no longer feel tense around him has done little to lessen the fact that I am still incredibly conscious of everything he does. Every movement he makes catches my attention, even as he moves very slowly to stand. His face passes mine with barely an inch and a half of space between us. My breath hitches slightly in my chest as he does so. Sebastian does not seem to notice. Standing, he looks down at me intensely. It is all that I can do to meet his unwavering gaze, looking up at him as I try to figure out why he is looking at me like that. When he says nothing, I ask, "What are you staring at?"

"Young master, I need for you to stand up before I can finish undressing you for your bath."

"Oh." I can feel myself start to flush from embarrassment as I stand up so that Sebastian can finish unbuttoning my nightshirt. Removing the garment once it is unbuttoned is no major event. Once it is gone, however, I can feel his fingertips on the skin of my stomach as he reaches down to unfasten the pajama pants that I wore underneath the shirt. That single touch causes my muscles to tense, but he says nothing.

He kneels on the ground to remove my slippers so that the pants will be easier to take off. At the sight of his head just below the level of my waist, I finally give up and turn my gaze away from him. Many thoughts are running through my mind just then, and most of them were not things that I should have been considering as he knelt at my feet and undressed me. Or the sort of things that I should be considering at all, in all honesty. He is my servant, my demon, here to serve me under a contract. It is strange how very little that contract has even entered my mind as of late. Even stranger is the fact that his status under me has no bearing on the things that he causes me to desire.

Seconds later, my clothing is gone and Sebastian has removed himself so that I might climb into the bath. The water is perfect, neither too warm nor too cold. Sitting back in the water, I sink further into the tub and let myself relax. This is something that I know well. I can distract myself from Sebastian by listening to his report of the daily news and events. He is pulling soap and a fresh washcloth from a small basket that is set on a table beside the bath as he begins to tell me of the various happenings around the house. "While Finny has greatly improved with his self-control lately, he has managed to decimate yet another wheelbarrow. I have instructed him to purchase two from the store later when he next travels to buy gardening supplies, so that we might avoid another trip to make a secondary purchase later this week."

"Have him buy three. Perhaps we can delay the next purchase even further."

Sebastian nods. "Very well. I have spoken with the carpenter that will be handling the new cabinetry in the kitchen. He will be able to complete the work in two weeks' time. He will speak to you himself on the Tuesday after next regarding the billing."

"Alright," I say. Considering something, I ask, "Where is Lizzy?"

  "Lady Phantomhive has gone into town to shop for new dresses. She took MeyRin, Paula, Finny and Snake with her. I believe that they will return home around four," Sebastian says, motioning for me to move forward slightly so that he can pour water through my hair and lather it with soap.

Silence falls between us as he goes about his duties, rinsing my hair and making certain that it is completely free of the suds. When he finishes, he pulls the washcloth back from where he had been keeping it and dips it into the bath water. Leaning forward, I let him start the slow and steady pace of rubbing the material over my back in circles. After a moment, he says, "Young master, I wonder if I might ask you a question."

"Go ahead."

  "Why did you kiss me last night?"

Even before the last of the words leaves his mouth, I sit up straighter in the tub and turn to look at him. I had been wondering when something like that would happen. I should have known that he would ask. The silence had been too good to last. He had waited until the ideal opportunity had presented itself. After all, it is not as though I can escape his questions while I am sitting in my bath.

Sebastian looks at me expectantly, one eyebrow quirked slightly above the other as he waits for my response. The hand that had been moving in circles against my back has stopped as he waits to see exactly what I will do.

"I kissed..." my voice is bolder than I would have expected or wanted as I begin my bold declaration. It dies as quickly as it began in my throat, replaced with a tone of the slightest uncertainty. Sebastian is the only one who has ever heard me speak like this. "I kissed you because I... wanted to. However, I should not have done so. It was a mistake on my part. Is it a problem?"

  "Not at all," he replies smoothly. His voice falls silent for the barest fraction of a second, his eyes never leaving my own. That look is enough to send chills down my spine even though the bath water is warm. "However, I wonder if my young master intends to leave it at just that."

A sinking feeling pulls at my stomach as I realize that I had not actually considered what else there might be to do about the situation. While I have admitted to myself that I desire him, and likely have for some time, it is not as though I would have considered something more with Sebastian. At the very thought, I can feel that heat that drew me to him earlier in the day beginning to build once more. Must he lean so close to me while we talk? "What do you mean, Sebastian?"

  "I am simply wondering if you might make such a 'mistake' again," he says. A hum like a purr sounds deep in his throat as he finally pulls away, giving me space enough to breathe.

  He leaves me staring at him and feeling every bit as uncertain of myself as I had been yesterday. "Sebastian..."

  If he notices my quiet utterance, he says nothing. Already he has resumed the soft actions of the washcloth on my back. For now, the conversation has ended. Our morning routine is also coming to a close. Even though I am his master, I suspect that he has far more control over both of us than I would care to ponder.

When I was younger, I enjoyed business meetings and the dealings that I had to go through while dealing with merchants and suppliers for Funtom Company. Over the years, the dealings have lost much of their appeal. While once I saw them as their own sort of game, one of loss and profit, they are now little more than dreary processions that I must deal with on an almost daily basis. The meeting today was no exception. The man that I had to speak with was unhappy about the shipments that were being delivered from one of my factories near Townsend. The issue had taken far longer to resolve than I had originally thought that it might. What should have taken an hour wound up taking nearly six.

Standing outside of my mansion, I watch as his carriage drives away. I find myself unsurprised to see my wife's own vehicle pulling steadily down the lane. Lizzy has finally returned home from her day out. Sebastian had said that she would be home around four. Even though two additional hours have passed, I have not worried. I know that she had MeyRin at her side. As always, she had also taken both Snake and Finny to drive and load the carriage. Were it busier at the mansion, I would have asked one of the men to remain behind. As it is, I am glad that they went with her.

The carriage pulls up in front of the house and comes to a quick stop. As soon as it has come to a full halt, Snake hops down from the front of the carriage and holds the door to allow the occupants of the cab to step out. Despite myself, I can feel a smile settle into place as Lizzy steps down onto the drive. She looks happy and radiant, even for her, as she chats animatedly with MeyRin, who follows soon after. The last one out of the carriage is Paula. Originally, Paula worked for the Middleford household. However, she and Lizzy have always been close. When Lizzy and I were married, Paula came to work for our household. The ladies chat among themselves as Snake begins to unload the selection of boxes that Lizzy has manages to accumulate while she was out. When the last of them is out, Lizzy thanks Snake and then comes to see me.

  MeyRin and Paula both give me a warm hello before they hurry into the house, leaving me alone with my wife. Her gloved hands slide into my own fingers as I offer her a smile. "Welcome home."

Squeezing her fingers in mine, I turn and lead the way into the house. While she is returning home, she is perfectly on time for dinner. The food is exquisite, as it always is. Lizzy is happily conversing with me and MeyRin, who hovers nearby, recounting some of the day's more amusing events. She does not seem to notice the fact that I am not participating in the conversation as much as I probably should. It is hard to focus on the chatter when Sebastian is quietly watching me from the corner of the room. My eyes flick to him whenever I think he is not watching me. When he looks back, I look away and try to join in with the conversation even though I have invariably lost track of whatever they were discussing. The meaningless small talk fades into the background as the sounds of clinking china and fine silver fill the air. Taking a deep breath, I try to enjoy the meal and talk to the others. There is much on my mind, but this is still nothing more than another evening in my home.

When dinner comes to an end, I stand to walk back to my office. There are still papers left from the week that have gone unfinished. Some part of me also wants to be alone with my thoughts. As I stand, however, Lizzy's voice pulls me back to the dining room. "Ciel."

"What is it?"

"Will you spend a little time with me?" She asks, smiling charmingly at me as she walks up from the other side of the table. "It's only natural for a wife to want to spend time with her husband. I haven't seen much of you lately. I miss you."

  Tension runs through me for the barest fraction of a second. Even now, I am having difficulty looking at her when Sebastian is only a few meters away. I push the tension away and replace my hesitation with acceptance. "Of course. What would you like to do?"

"Will you play chess with me?" She asks, stepping closer as she realizes that I am accepting her offer. Her eyes begin to take on some of the childish sparkle that they have lost over the past few years. Did she really think I would choose business over her? If I were busier, I might, but I do enjoy spending time with her.

Nodding, I follow her through the halls and to a parlor where we keep one of our many chessboards. I have amassed something of a collection over the past few years. Even so, I rarely play. As she and I sit down to the board and begin our game in the fading light of evening, I must admit that she has greatly improved. That does not change the fact that the game still ends with my victory. We both retreat to the sofa that occupies the room, she with a book of poetry and I with a volume of Poe. A fire burns warm and bright in the hearth thanks to the efforts of MeyRin, adding the smallest amount of warmth to the slight chill of the evening.

  I am not the sort of person who enjoys spending time with others. More often than not, I find the act of socializing to be tedious and boring. That being said, there is something pleasant about sitting here and reading a book in the quiet, comfortable silence of this parlor with Lizzy at my side. She has a certain kind of grace about her as she reads her book of poems, fingers hovering over the edges of the pages as her eyes drift over the words. In the flickering light of the flames, she is beautiful.

I cannot concentrate on my book. Glancing to the side, I lay it on the arm of the sofa. Lizzy notices, turning to offer me a curious smile. "Are you all right?"

"I'm fine."

  Carefully, she slides her book closed and sets it on the rosewood table that stands next to her end of the sofa. "I was worried when you did not come back to bed last night. What happened?"

  A sick, sinking feeling settles into my stomach as the words leave her lips. Some part of me had hoped that she would not ask me that question. I had hoped that I might somehow manage to avoid accounting for why I had not returned to our room last night. The lies that I use to cover my actions come as easily as I was telling the truth. "I decided to finish a few things in the office. I didn't want to wake you, so I slept in one of the guest rooms when I had finished."

  I will not, cannot, tell her what I had really done last night. I do not want to know what her reaction would be if she knew exactly what happened last night or what had occupied my thoughts as I drifted off to sleep in the guest room that I woke in this morning. I had not been able to look at her last night. Now, I am having trouble looking at her as I tell her the pretty lies that I know she would prefer to hear. She has convinced herself that I love her. She is happy that way. I do not know whether or not she is right.

  Her face is blank as she listens to my excuse, considering my words. For a moment, I wonder if she will believe me at all. Perhaps the deception is too obvious, or maybe she senses that I am not being entirely truthful. Even if that is the case, it does not show as she smiles again, warm and trusting. Even if she knows it is a lie, she will believe it. As the wife of an earl, she has no other option. It is easier this way. If I go through with what I am considering with Sebastian, it will be easier if she swallows the falsehoods that I tell her and never questions. She has grown so much, but in this way, she is still so much like a child.

Scooting over on the couch, she leans against me. I wrap my arm around her, enjoying her sweet presence for a moment just as much as she is enjoying mine. The moment ends too soon as she leans up and places a chaste kiss on my lips. Then, standing, she leans over and runs a hand through my hair, careful to avoid the string that holds my eye patch in place. Smiling, she says, "I am tired. I will go sleep. Take your time if you need it. I know you have been busy lately."

  Nodding, I look up at her. "Rest well."

  With one last, lingering smile, she turns and walks out of the parlor. For once, I am alone with my own thoughts. As soon as she is gone, my mind turns toward the subject that has been haunting those thoughts since last night. Sebastian. The conversation from my bath this morning is still as fresh in my mind as it was then. There is no other way to look at the situation but that he has not only accepted what happened last night, he desires more. I would be lying if I said that I had not considered following that particular path further than I have already. Still, some part of my mind rebels against it. Perhaps it is my upbringing; perhaps it is the fact that I am married. I cannot say for certain why I resist. I do not even know how long that resistance will be able to hold up.

The situation would be easier for me if I knew precisely why I was drawn to him. I prefer situations that I understand the reasons and logic. This particular instance is beyond my comprehension for the moment. I am well aware that others find him very attractive. There is no denying the fact that Sebastian is handsome. His appearance and the fact that others find him attractive has caused trouble for me more than once, even within my own household. MeyRin's girlish crush on him has not faded with the passing of time, and has occasionally been a source of tension. I have often wondered at the fact that people do not suspect that he is something more than human simply from the fact that his appearance is fundamentally flawless. Not that I would ever tell him that. He is smug enough without hearing me utter such uselessly encouraging remarks. I have never stopped to judge whether or not I find him attractive. As a man, and a married man at that, it has never been something that I have bothered to consider.

Before the falling out that he and I had, we had been very close. I would not call the connection that we had friendship, but it had been intimate in a way that had caused me to acknowledge that Sebastian was more than just my servant or even my slave through our contract. I had never considered that connection in a romantic or sexual sense. Sitting here and watching the flames of the fire in front of me, I wonder now if perhaps I have been misjudging myself on more levels than one.

The lightest sound of a breath tells me that I am not alone. Out of the corner of my eye, I see the shadows of firelight highlight the very edges of a crisp black suit jacket. Sebastian is standing by the couch, only a few feet away from me. I have no idea how long he has been there, but I am quite sure of the fact that I am only aware of his presence because he wishes me to be. He says nothing. Rather than ignore him, I decide to ask a question that has taunted my mind for weeks. "Sebastian, why did you kiss me that night before the wedding?"

  "There were many reasons, young master," Sebastian says, his voice surprisingly warm.

I turn my head slightly, looking at him. "What were they?"

Sebastian inclines his head, turning to return my gaze. His rich brown eyes are lit from behind with the lightest hint of red. The light of it highlights the edges of his irises, giving him an otherworldly feel. "Firstly, and foremost, I did so because I greatly desire my young master. Secondly, because I did not - and still do not - like the thought of someone else laying claim to something that is mine. Lastly, I did so because it seemed like an opportune moment to take advantage of, especially since I had begun to think that you might perhaps be inclined to indulge my whims."

  His words are unexpected and direct. Quietly, I ask, "You think I am yours?"

"The seal in your right eye says that your very soul is mine, young master," he tells me. "Though, I admit that I have long since desired more than just that."

Very slowly, I pull myself to my feet and turn to face him so that I can look him in the eye. The glow in his gaze does not fade as he looks back at me and waits for my reaction. I cannot read the expression on his face, but it does nothing to lessen the strangeness of the situation, knowing that I am standing in front of the demon to who I sold my soul. "What do you mean by more?"

"That is entirely for my master to decide."

With every fiber in my body, I know that I have a decision to make right now. If I so desire, I can turn and walk out the door to the parlor and away from Sebastian. If I do, he will never mention last night or this moment again. I am certain, in a way that I rarely am, that he would never again touch me in a suggestive manner or look at me the way he is now after tonight. All that I would need to do is turn and walk away, putting an end to this. Instead, I take a step forward so that I am only inches from him. His lips widen into the slightest of smiles. He looks over my shoulder. I turn my head to see if someone is standing in the doorway. Instead, I watch as the door to the parlor slides closed seemingly of its own accord. There is a click as the lock turns, ensuring that no one will enter without permission.

  Turning back to face him, I do what I have been thinking about all day. Leaning forward, I kiss him. This is different than it was last night. There is no rush or urgency or anger behind this. This time, I can actually see what he feels like. Taking another step forward, my chest brushes against his. Sebastian is still slightly taller than I am, though now only by a few scant inches rather than by more than a foot. While he may be taller, his body is narrower than my own. The way he presses up against me is something that I am starting to relish even as I taste his lips once more.

Reaching up with my right hand, I tilt his face to find a better angle. His skin is unnaturally smooth. I cannot feel even the slightest hint of stubble. As he moves, his lips part and I take that opportunity to deepen the kiss. His tongue tangles with mine as I press into the caress, pushing him backwards with the force of my touch. My hand on his arm and my body against his guide both of us backwards. Against my lips, he smiles as he follows the motion. Something about forcing him to move, to do as I wish, is empowering to me. His smile is frustrating, though, and it tells me that I am only able to tell him what to do because he is allowing it. I pull away, glaring at him. He knows I am frustrated. Shoving him back against the bookcase, I ignore the sound of several volumes falling from the shelves as I claim his mouth once more with my own.

  Everywhere that my skin touches his feels like static. His fingers reaching up to untie the patch over my right eye are a tangible heat as they brush against my skin and through my hair. He never once breaks the actions of his lips as he untangles the cord and slides the cloth away. It falls to the floor unnoticed as one of his hands run through the hair at the back of my head, pulling me closer to him even as I press him back against the shelves. Those devilish fingers slide down the back of my neck, drawing an unexpected groan from my lips as he loosens my tie and draws his fingers across my neck. That single touch sends a shiver down my back. Desperate for air, I pull away ever so slightly from him and break the kiss. The sound of my panting breath is unexpectedly loud in the evening air. Against my lips, I can feel Sebastian's mouth moving as he whispers, "Young master..."

My only response is a rough breath against his lips when I feel his hand on my back pressing my body against his. My heart is beating so loudly that I am certain he can hear the sound of it. Heat, like a madness, is burning through my veins. I never knew that it was possible for Sebastian to arouse such a desire in me.

  When I do not respond, he pulls his lips away from mine and leans up so that the very edges of them brush against my ear. They tickle at my earring as he asks, "Is this truly what you want, my lord? This, even with all of the many repercussions that it may have?"

As the words leave his lips, the hand that is not on my back trails down from where he had loosened my tie and presses into my body. His fingers drag down the length of my waistcoat, flattening out so that his palm presses against the growing evidence of precisely how much I want this. The feel of his fingers through my trousers draws a quiet groan from my lips. An instant later, he is pushed roughly back as I claim his lips once more. I am hungry for him now, in every way possible. His scent, his very taste is all-consuming. I have no reason to hold back now. A deep, purring sound rumbles from his chest as he responds to my touch with every bit as much enthusiasm as I am giving him. When I pull away from him, panting, he licks his lips. Staring at him with an intensity I have not felt before, I ask, "Are you trying to make me second guess myself, Sebastian?"

  "Not at all, young master," he says. "However, it may interest you to know that MeyRin is standing just outside of the door."

To be continued...
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The Spaces Between Us