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Role Reversal	By : sashocirrione Category: Death Note > Yaoi-Male/Male > L/Light Views: 4101 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 1
Disclaimer: I do not own Death Note, and I do not make any money from these writings.

Chapter List
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CHAPTER 2: Resistance

On Light's chosen night, he waited until L was at the peak of his spooning and heavy breathing behaviors, and then whispered his observation gently, to avoid sounding too forceful or alarming.

"You're in love with me."

At the statement L's breath caught in his throat, and he said something that had the distinct tone of a swear word, but was in some language Light didn't recognize. L didn't move away. It felt like a small victory and Light wanted to smirk but he held it back, sure that L would go over the video footage later.

Light said, "You are in love, then."

He could feel the sudden increase of tension in L's body, the stiffness of his muscles.

L said, "I am not."

Light paused for effect, and then answered, "Really? Is that the best you can come up with? No reasons or logic to support your statement? At the very least, you must admit you're attracted to me sexually. The evidence is right here."

Light pushed backwards, grinding against L's erection and making him gasp.

In a steady, deliberate voice, L said, "I'm not attracted to serial killers."

"I gave you my full confession and said I was sorry."

L hissed, "Do you really think that 'sorry' has any meaning when you've murdered three thousand, four hundred and eighty-one people?"

"Logically, what else can I say or do now? The past can't be changed."

"If you were truly sorry you would have shut down the Kira plan instead of murdering my co-workers and your own girlfriend in an attempt to continue it. Preferably, you would have shut down your demented scheme very early in your reign of terror. Do not talk to me about being sorry. I'm too intelligent to believe that you would have been sorry for any outcome other than being caught."

"Well," Light said, "you obviously need me, so perhaps you should explain to me why giving in to our mutual urges would be such a terrible thing, when resisting is clearly interfering with your ability to work effectively."

Light knew it had been a good guess when L's muscles suddenly got even stiffer.

It is true. He's suffering even more than he's revealed to me.

L said, "It's a sleeping disorder. I have tried doctors, medicines, counseling, and even mechanical fixes such as attempting to sleep in a room of pure oxygen. My ability to sleep has always been poor, and I made the mistake of allowing my body to become habituated to your presence during our months chained together. Sleeping in the same bed as you is only a temporary measure until I can develop an alternative solution. I am not in love."

"Really?" Light said, and rolled over within L's grasp, bringing their faces close, noses almost touching as they lay together on their sides.

L's eyes went very wide, his breathing coming in gulps, his body wracked with little shivers that Light could feel as he grasped the detective closely. Light doubted that L had any lubricant close at hand, but there were many things that two intelligent males could think of that didn't require lube.

Breathing softly, Light closed the short distance between their lips. The moment of connection felt almost like an electric spark, and a surging warmth in Light's groin answered that spark as L melted into the kiss, lips hesitant but moving, moving against Light's own, soft and swollen and slightly chapped and so delicious. Light took control of the kiss, sliding one hand along L's jaw to hold him in place as he maneuvered his body on top of the detective, straddling him; their hardnesses pressed together, both restricted by only fabric.

It felt good to be on top of him, arms and legs entangled, claiming his mouth and kissing it, refusing to let go, making him respond back. Every area of contact was a source of intense longing, of wishing for the impeding cloth to be gone, to experience the pleasant shock of warm skin on warm skin. L was awkward and bony and with too many knees and elbows jutting everywhere, and yet everything fit just perfectly, their bodies slipping together and parts nestling into each available hollow.

Light broke the kiss to get a good look and to hopefully attend to the unneeded clothing. L was red-faced, wriggling underneath him. Light couldn't believe it could be a blush, not on L who had no true shame, but L was obviously worked up. He was panting, his fingers digging in the sheets, his eyes confused and sultry all at once.

Light pushed L's shirt up, displaying a long, smooth and lightly-muscled expanse of milky-pale stomach and chest, heaving from L's breaths, decorated with two deeply pink and erect nipples. Light couldn't resist and he leaned down to mouth one, sensuously licking it with his tongue and reveling in the responsive shivering of the man underneath him.

He scooted his entire body down, straddling L's knees, and hooked his fingers under the waistband of L's boxers, yanking them down all in one motion and causing the very obvious erection to spring free and stand nearly vertical, drunkenly swaying slightly to one side, flushed with color and very swollen, just beginning to leak pre-cum.

L said, "Stop it!"

There was a real note of panic in L's voice. His eyes were impossibly wide, a lost and frightened look glistening in their inky depths.

Light traced a finger along L's lower stomach, making L's dick twitch and the pre-cum drip out steadily faster, a series of pearly drops. L let out a soft, breathy moan as if trying unsuccessfully to stifle it. He was shivering as Light worked his way teasingly closer with small strokes of his finger-tip, circling the target with a lazy trail across L's abdomen and thighs.

It felt somehow wrong. Light couldn't quite get up the courage to grasp the object of his search, and so he whispered, "You could push me away if you wanted to, L. You do want this. You've been craving it and teasing me, using me for your desires. You owe-"

Watari's voice suddenly erupted from some hidden speaker, saying, "Light Yagami, if you do not withdraw your hands this instant, I will see to it that they are cut off."

Light scrambled over to his side of the bed and lay down, acutely conscious of the chains for the first time in minutes as he untangled the blankets from around them and pulled the blankets up over his body.

He didn't look at L, but he could hear the sound of clothing being pulled back into place and then the usual noises of L trying various positions, slowly and frustratingly attempting to settle into sleep without success.

After a time, L let out a big sigh and commanded, "Turn onto your side."

Light glanced at L and felt a small stab of pity at the utterly confused look in his eyes.

Light said to the room, "Watari, I'm not touching him, see? Don't hurt me."

L said, "I will see to it that Watari does not unduly punish you. Now, turn onto your side."

Light obeyed, and felt the familiar warm weight of L's body settling against his backside, accompanied by the obvious erection pressing against him, the clutching arms, and the speeding up of L's breathing. His own erection was almost painfully swollen, an intense ache needing relief.

"Really, L? We're back to this again?"

L replied, "I still require sleep and I do not see any reason to stop."

"You're giving me mixed messages."

"I'm not in love with you."

He doesn't say he's not attracted to me, because that part is now too obvious.

"Let's try an experiment," Light said, "I'll let you rub against me as much as you want. If you wish, you can come. I think you'll get better sleep and function far more effectively at your tasks the next day."

L muttered, "That will... not work. I am not capable of having an orgasm that way."

"If we use something mildly slippery, any two opposing surfaces will be sufficient... you can put it between my thighs, or between both our stomachs, or into my armpit... if you bring real lubrication, we could even-"

L's breathing speeded up even more and he said, "Do not suggest these things! I am not a toy for you to play with, Kira! No matter how excited you have become as a result of my attempts to sleep, I do not owe you anything."

L's weight shifted in place and his arms tightened. Every part of him was so close, and yet too far away. The juncture between Light's legs positively throbbed, and he struggled to keep his thoughts clear.

Light said, "You're too proud to say what you want, aren't you?"

There was no answer.

"You're childish and you hate to lose."

L still said nothing.

Light said, "You've already won. You won, okay? It doesn't matter any longer. Whatever might happen between us is insignificant compared to that. It isn't about the past; it's about the future. If this is what you need to function, and you know that's true, just as well as I know it, then you should claim me as your prize."

With considerable venom in his voice, L said, "I don't want to be sexually involved with you."

"You already are, and you're in denial about the nature of your involvement."

L was silent once again.

I need a slightly different approach, or he'll simply continue to dig his heels in.

Light said, "You're not succumbing to me, L. I'm succumbing to you. Touch me and you'll know without a doubt."

L said, "It is ridiculous to take suggestions from-"

"I'm not a suspect anymore, and you know very well that this isn't an idea I implanted in your mind. You had the urge before I said anything. If you let this problem continue to consume your mind, then you'll have let the issue of Kira win against you in some small way."

Light spread his legs and added, "Here. Touch me as much as you want. I won't make you do anything and you can stop if you become uncomfortable."

L's fingers descended slowly, hesitating over Light's stomach, clutching in the fabric there as if afraid to go further down. Light waited patiently, and when L's breaths had become ragged, the fingers started moving again, like shy spiders slowly walking. They stopped at the hem of Light's pajama pants, resting there, testing the elastic band but not venturing further.

Light waited. He had an instinct that L would stop if any words were said at the wrong moment. It was not long until the fingers began venturing further, dipping under the clothing, into Light's underwear, warm presences against the skin of his groin, just shy of the target, stroking softly in place. The anticipation nearly managed to force words from Light's mouth, but he stayed silent, not willing to risk it.

Then, suddenly, L's hands moved, clasping together around Light's stiff organ, squeezing lightly yet exquisitely. Light closed his eyes and couldn't help but whisper, "Yes."

He wanted to drive his penis forward into the pocket formed by L's hands over and over again, but he stayed still, wriggling slightly in place, almost painfully aroused. He could feel L's matching erection pressed much more tightly against his thigh, slight movements of L's hips just barely moving it back and forth.

L's body was curled all around him, arms and legs clasping and inter-tangled, moist breath and tickling hair and layers of intruding cloth.

It was then that L began to stroke, firmly, in a determined and rhythmic way. Light closed his eyes and lost himself to the movements. Each bit of sliding force was almost too much and he moaned breathily as L continued to work, those hands showing more confidence, grasping more boldly.

Light felt L's teeth on his shoulder and understood.

"You can bite if you want to."

Light felt L's teeth biting hard, so hard he was sure it would leave a pink mark even through the fabric, wet and not too painful, and L was breathing so raggedly through his clenched teeth it was almost frightening, as if he'd just run a marathon, and Light snapped his hips rhythmically into the pressure and warmth of those busy, squeezing hands, building up and up, until he started coming.

L's hands paused and Light barely gasped out, "Don't stop," as he spurted more warmth, writhing in pleasure and then the hands slid again and Light threw back his head as his orgasm rose to a shuddering peak so intense that he forgot who and where he was for a few moments.

As Light came down from his high into a lazy, satisfied glow, L's hands withdrew, but L's breathing was as heavy as ever and his hips were grinding with a frantic tempo. Light took a few more gulps of air to get his breath back, and then he slowly, slowly turned around within L's grasp, ready to try a repeat of the disastrous first make out session.

This time L met his kisses more hungrily, and Light decided not to climb on top of him - perhaps that was what had touched off L's earlier panic - instead opting to lie facing him, side by side, but Light conspired to gradually descend along L's body, first moving the kisses to his neck, and then his chest.

When Light's mouth reached L's stomach, that was when the trembling started, and a kind of needy half-whine broke from L's lips every now and then, quickly bitten back. Light nuzzled his way down to the top edge of L's boxers, grasped the fabric in his teeth, and pulled them out of the way, returning with his mouth to lick and nuzzle beside L's painful-looking immensely swollen erection, not touching it at all except with the barest brushes of the side of his cheek.

L formed one hand into a fist and started nibbling along his knuckles.

Light breathed hotly in the direction of his target. It twitched, and Light was almost sure it had swelled even more in response.

Light whispered, "L, that's not good for you. It looks sort of purple. I think you need to let me help you come. As soon as you say so, I'll put it in my mouth."

Light looked up, and caught L's glare as L continued to nibble furiously at his knuckles.

"I'm sorry," Light said, "but you have to say it this time. I can't risk getting my body parts cut off."

L's eyes changed, the intense glare melting into a look of pity and confusion. He seemed as if he might say something at any moment, but the silence stretched out. Light kept L's penis twitching the entire time by repeatedly breathing in its direction.

At last, L closed his eyes and whispered, "Please!"

Light gave it a few test licks, tasting it, getting ready, and then, provoking a huge gasp from L, he enclosed the entire top part in his mouth, as much as he could get in without choking, and started a slow, steady rhythm, one designed to make sure it wouldn't just be an instant explosion. L needed to enjoy it, to get used to it, not to simply get a quick release that he could quickly forget about.

Light wrapped his hands around the lower part of the shaft, feeling the soft skin sliding easily over the swollen hardness beneath, hiding a smirk as he saw L suddenly put his whole fist in his mouth, making muffled sounds around it, red-faced and squirming, looking uncomfortable, immensely turned on, and oh so sultry. There was something unguarded, honest and real in L's eyes for once.

L took out his fist and muttered, "I can't... faster."

Light complied, and saw a sudden tenseness in L's body, his spine jerking into an arch. He felt the throbbing in his mouth, and the next moment a salty explosion. L's eyes were closed, his mouth a perfect circle, his face suffused with color, his chest heaving with strong panting as he emptied in several more spurts. His body finished and crumpled, limp onto the sheets. Already, he was starting to seem more like the usual L again, and not the startlingly erotic being Light had seen for far too short a time.

L curled into a ball, uncurled, and then pulled his clothing back into place as his eyes became shifty, his gaze wandering here and there, up and down. L retreated to the furthest part of the bed and crouched there. The expression on his face looked a little bit dangerous, so Light hung back, giving him space.

The detective nibbled on his finger, knees clutched to his chest and nervous eyes darting back and forth. He muttered, "I don't like you, Kira!"

"Kira is only one part of my mind, and you know it is a part that will be destroyed completely when you burn my death note or when the time limit for my memories runs out."

"I do not know this for a fact. There are no conclusive tests I can perform beforehand, to be completely sure of that."

Light replied, "It's not my word you'll be taking. You proved my memory was erased before to your own satisfaction, and you know that you're able to tell when I'm acting, or at least you can tell well enough to detect something like that. I couldn't seem authentic to you if I were trying to feign missing memories for days and days on end."

L's gaze dropped to the floor and he nibbled his finger harder than ever. He looked forlorn and depressed.

After a time, L said, "I suppose this means I have much to think about."

"If you reject me and then have me executed, you'll regret it for the rest of your life, even if you fall out of love with me. You'll always wonder if it was an immorally-motivated killing, because I failed to become the wished-for lover that you could have accepted easily."

In a low, quiet monotone, L said, "I have already thought of that. I am not unaware of the negative consequences your execution could bring. There are many reasons why you are still alive, and these reasons do not now go away simply because of our... involvement."

Light said, "You don't quite understand what it's like to own a death note. There's some kind of magic in the process of ownership, a magic that makes you want to try it."

"Do not try to fool me. You may have killed one or two victims innocently in the beginning, but over the course of Kira's career you obviously made many killing decisions based on your own desires."

"Think of it this way: if I had never picked up the death note, I would be a perfectly suitable lover for you, correct?"

After a pause, L replied, "You are correct."

"Well, whenever you burn my death note, or let my memories run out, then I'll be exactly as if I'd never picked up a death note. Even I won't know the difference. If you want me to be a suitable lover for you, the power to make me that way is always in your hands."

L closed his eyes and looked very, very tired. He muttered, "Turn around."

"What?"

"In case you had forgotten, I still need to sleep. Turn around."

Light settled onto his side and felt the familiar sensation of L cuddling close behind, the detective sighing and gradually falling asleep.
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Role Reversal