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The Best You Never Had	By : midnightphoenix Category: Gravitation > Yaoi - Male/Male > Yuki/Shuichi Views: 716 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I don't own Gravitation or its characters. All stories are written purely for fun. No profit is generated from the writing of these stories.

Chapter List
- 1-If Happy Ever After Did Exist
- 2-Make You Miss Me
- 1
- 2
“We leave something of ourselves behind when we leave a place; we stay there, even though we go away. And there are things in us that we can find again only by going back there.” – Pascal Mercier, Night Train to Lisbon
Yuki finished packing the small overnight bag that Mika had brought with her when she visited. A nagging thought had plagued him the entire time. In the time that he’d been admitted, he hadn’t seen a trace of Shuichi. At the very least, he had expected him to come busting through his door the day he’d been taken to the hospital. Not that he’d admit it to anyone, but this un-Shuichi like behavior had him worried. Not to mention the strange dream he’d had this morning. He would have sworn that he felt someone standing next to his bedside. Shuichi, is that you? His mind had questioned.
His eyes had slit open a little, confirming by the moonlight streaming in the window that it was Shuichi. His face was somber, an emotion that he didn’t equate with the singer. Soft pink hair was given a halo effect as he stood beside his bed from the moonlight streaming in. His eyes were shadowed as he spoke to him. Shuichi would never say anything like what Yuki had just heard. “Yuki…” The words had been whispered softly, so quietly in the room that he had to struggle to hear them. “I don’t want you to go to New York, Yuki. But I don’t want you to suffer because of me, either. That’s why this time I’m leaving instead. I don’t want to, but I think it’s something that I have to do. Our time apart will help us figure out what we want from this relationship. Goodbye, Yuki. I’ll always love you.” The flow of words stopped and he felt a feather-soft kiss placed on his forehead. The subtle scent that was wholly Shuichi surrounded him and he drank it in. But those words made a shudder of uneasiness ripple down his spine. Something was wrong. He knew it as soon as he awoke this morning.
A knock on the door signaled that he was not alone before Mika walked in. “Are you ready to go, Eiri?”
Nodding at his sister, he reached over and picked his bag off of the bed. More than ever he was ready to leave the hospital. Hospitals were something he just couldn’t tolerate. All he wanted to do was go home to his pink-haired brat. A small smile crossed his face at that thought. His brat…yes, he liked the sound of that. A moment later he was seated in Mika’s car, silently praying that her driving had improved. On top of everything that had happened, he didn’t feel like being slung into the side of the car door. The silence between them was beginning to wear thin on his nerves since he knew that Mika was preparing for an argument about something. It was always a surprise to him what the topic would be, but somehow it all would soon center on his relationship with Shuichi. And that was something that he felt was none of his sister’s, or Tohma’s, business. “While I appreciate the silence, is there something you wanted to say, Mika?”
“Are you still leaving for New York, Eiri? Or have you decided to stay?” Mika could see that while his relationship with Shindou-kun had helped him in some ways, there was also the damage that it had inflicted on him. And while she wanted him to be happy, she didn’t want to see him suffer, either.
“I’ve made up my mind to stay. And no matter what both you and Seguchi suggest, I’m not ending my relationship with Shuichi. Quite frankly, I don’t think it’s either of your business about my personal life and how I handle it.” With that said he closed his eyes and leaned his head back on the headrest of his seat. Maybe that would get her off of his back for a few minutes.
“I see,” Mika replied, her attention flickering between Yuki and the road. “If that’s what you want, Eiri, then I’ll be supportive of your decision.” She allowed herself a small smile at what her brother had said. It seemed he loved the younger man if he was willing to tell her and Tohma to back off. She only hoped that he didn’t eventually regret his decision. Nothing else was said after that, but the tension eased slightly between the two of them.
Yuki waved absently as his sister drove off. Once inside the apartment building, he stopped outside of his assigned mailbox. Passing his bag to his other hand, he opened his mailbox to collect what mail was there. Reaching into the mailbox, he grabbed the stack of envelopes, his eye noticing something glinting slightly underneath the overhead lights. Reaching back in, he pulled out a key attached to a keychain…a very familiar keychain. The sterling silver quarter note charm winked merrily at him, the inscription that bore both his and Shuichi’s names staring him in the face. His heart hammering, he made a mad dash to get to his apartment. He cursed as he juggled his bag and the mail while trying to get the keys out of his pocket. Finally, the door was open and he was inside of his apartment. Throwing his bag to the floor, the mail tossed with it, he all but ran to the living area. Everything was wrong…it was all wrong! The spotless living area taunted him. No CDs placed precariously in a pile alongside the wall. No game console in front of the television or videos of Shuichi’s beloved Nittle Grasper. No trace of Shuichi remained in this room when just a few days before everything had been there.
Turning around, he spotted boxes stacked neatly beside the front door. In his frantic desire to find Shuichi, he’d not noticed them when he came in. Walking over to where they were, his insides churned as he recognized the writing on the note that was attached. Reaching out a shaky hand, he plucked it off of the top box.
Yuki,
I’ve left what I didn’t want to take with me here. Please contact Hiro and he can either take it to his apartment or to my parents’ home.
Shuichi
Brusque and to the point…nothing like Shuichi would normally write. No flowery statements of love, just a simple note telling him how to get rid of Shuichi’s things. Yuki found himself robotically walking back to the sofa where he slumped down into its cushions, the keychain dangling limply from his hand. The shock still hadn’t completely sunk in yet. Now he understood why Shuichi had never shown up at the hospital. His eyes widened suddenly as a thought went through his mind. What if his dream really wasn’t a dream? It suddenly explained the sense of uneasiness that he’d woken up with this morning. Shuichi had visited him this morning, only to tell him that he was leaving. Why? Everything was fine before he left to go to the hospital. Shuichi had still been here. What would have caused him to leave like this? The boy who had chased him down all the way to Kyoto…who had forced his way into his life – this sudden behavior wasn’t something that he could pin down.
Sighing, he knew there was only one person to call. He didn’t want to, but at this point, he was desperate for answers. He wanted to know where Shuichi was so he could bring him back where he belonged. And if he had to swallow some pride to do it then he would, no matter how painful it was. Still holding Shuichi’s keychain in a death grip, he reached into his pants pocket to pull out his cell phone. He glared at the phone for a few minutes, before relenting and calling the dreaded number.
“Hello, Seguchi Tohma speaking.”
“Did you say something to Shuichi, Tohma?” He knew better than to beat around the bush. Get the questions he wanted to be answered out of the way first. It was the only way to deal with Tohma.
“What makes you think that I’ve spoken to Shindou-san, Eiri-san?”
“I know you had something to do with it! He never showed up at the hospital when I was admitted and now his stuff is packed into boxes. Don’t lie to me, damn it! I want some answers now.”
“Calm down, Eiri-san – remember your ulcer or do you want to wind up back in the hospital?” Tohma sighed before continuing. “I’m not lying, Eiri-san. I really don’t know what’s happened to Shindou-san. Both Sakano-san and Shindou-san’s band mates are in an uproar over what’s happened to him. As far as I know, he left Japan overnight, but we’ve not found a trace of his whereabouts. The only concrete evidence that I have is that he’s withdrawn a good portion of money from his banking account.”
Yuki just sat there in silence, trying to process the information Tohma had spoken to him. If Shuichi had withdrawn some money, then the chances were good that he would be coming back, correct? But it still made no sense. Nothing was adding up.
“There was one more thing, Eiri-san.” Tohma debated even telling Eiri about this. Eiri would view it as his fault somehow. Shindou-san, did you even realize that your decision to leave would affect him more than your entire media circus of a relationship ever did? He supposed that Shuichi blamed himself for what had happened to Eiri, and then to hear it reaffirmed had cemented his decision to leave. When he had heard from Sakano-san that morning that Shuichi had left Japan indefinitely, he hadn’t known what to think at first. Part of him had felt relief at Eiri having some of the pressure eased, but part of him had felt a niggling sense of guilt. He was certain that Shuichi had overheard their conversation the day before. In fact, he’d been surprised that the younger male had never shown up at the hospital. Now he knew why. Tohma had come to the realization in the past few days that he could not always protect Eiri, and in fact, probably had never had to do so. That was when he decided to ease up on Eiri’s relationship with Shuichi. And now this had to happen.
“Well, Tohma, are you going to spill it or not?” Yuki snarled, his patience having swiftly vanished.
“Both K-san and Nakano-san informed me that Shindou-san had gone to the hospital the day you were admitted. According to them, he had gone to see you but came back a few minutes later, saying only that you were alive and that he wanted to leave. Nakano-san asked why he didn’t want to stay with you and said that Shindou-san became somewhat emotional, saying that it was his entire fault. He shouted at them and then left. They both say that was the last time they heard from him.”
“I…I see.” Yuki finally replied. His finger was on the disconnect button when Tohma’s voice stopped him.
“Do you want me to find him, Eiri-san?”
Yuki swallowed to wet his suddenly dry throat. Wasn’t Shuichi better off without him? Everything that he had put up with…by all rights he should have left a long time ago. But he had stayed with Yuki at his worst, telling him that he loved him, while Yuki never said those simple three words to Shuichi. Was that what caused him to leave? Had he finally had enough? His hand tightened its grip on the phone. No…Yuki wasn’t just going to sit idly by and let Shuichi walk out of his life like that. It was time to show him how much he meant to the writer and for that he would need Tohma’s help in finding him.
“Eiri-san, are you still there?”
“Yes, Tohma, I want you to find him. It’s about time I started showing him how I really feel. He deserves that and more.”
“If that’s what you want, Eiri-san, then I’ll get right on it, then.” I’ll locate him, Eiri-san, but after that, it’s all up to you.
Yuki let the phone slip from his grasp, absently listening as it hit the couch with a muffled thump. Now he understood Shuichi’s words. He had heard the entire conversation. Yuki groaned as he recalled the words he had spoken to Mika that night. If Shuichi had been emotional when he arrived after he heard those words he must have been inconsolable. The knowledge that Shuichi blamed himself for Yuki’s condition hurt the novelist more than anything. His eyes lingered on the boxes that stood innocently at the door. He’d deal with that later.
Rising from the couch, he walked into their bedroom. He snorted softly as the words “their bedroom” wandered through his mind. Could he even really consider it to be theirs when after they had sex, he would send Shuichi back to the couch to sleep? Was this what their relationship consisted of? Him using Shuichi and then tossing him away until the next time he wanted him? It was no wonder that Shuichi got tired of it and left. Silently, he commended him for his decision, despite the gnawing pain it left in his heart. Lying down on the bed, he closed his eyes, fighting the tired feeling that threatened to overtake him.
He rolled over onto his side, burying his face in Shuichi’s pillow. It still contained traces of the singer’s unique scent, the smell of his shampoo. If Yuki thought about it honestly, he did love Shuichi. Although he never said it or overly showed it in any way, he did love him. But Shuichi didn’t know that. Right now, he probably thought he was just a burden to the older man. And that thought hurt worse than his abandonment. His eyes drifted shut, as weariness finally claimed him, unaware of the tears that slid down his face. In his dreams, Shuichi was still there. He was right beside him where he belonged, wearing a bright smile while his violet eyes sparkled with joy.
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Hiro parked his bike in front of NG Studios, unaware of the chaos that awaited him when he walked in the door. He was still thinking about Shu’s behavior from the night before. K was right. Something had to have happened for him to just leave Yuki like that when he was in the hospital. Their relationship was just getting too weird for his comfort level. Everything with them was set at the extreme level. Nothing was low-key. Walking into the studio, he was instantly greeted by the sight of a panicky Sakano, depressed Fujisaki, and pistol-waving K. He would have thought it was nothing out of the ordinary, but Shu wasn’t there. Glancing up at the clock, he saw that it was time for him to show up. Before he could relax, his reverie was broken by K.
“If you’re looking for Shuichi, Hiro-kun, then you’ll have a long wait ahead. He’s gone.”
Hiro’s jaw dropped upon hearing K’s little bombshell. “What the hell do you mean by gone?” He questioned.
“I mean exactly what I said.” K calmly replied. “Shuichi left Japan early this morning. His behavior set off warning bells, so I acted on a hunch and contacted his bank a few hours ago. Apparently, he’s withdrawn some money from his account. Naturally, after hearing that, I started contacting all of the airports, but no one has seen anyone matching his description. I’ve even checked the bus stations, train stations, everything – still no luck. Shuichi has made it very clear that he doesn’t want to be found.”
Hiro couldn’t believe it. “What the hell happened last night to just make him leave like that? This isn’t normal for Shu! Sure, he can be flighty and impulsive, but not to this extent!”
“You want my opinion?” Fujisaki piped up. “My bet is that Shindou-san overheard something that he shouldn’t have. You know as well as I do that both Yuki-san’s sister and brother-in-law were probably with him last night. And what are the odds their conversation was directed towards Shindou-san?”
“The kid’s got a point,” K replied. “We all know how those two get when it concerns Yuki-san. And this time, Shuichi was caught in the crossfire.”
“So there’s been no word from him?” Hiro asked.
“Nothing, there wasn’t even a phone call,” Sakano replied. “Unsurprisingly, when I talked to Shacho this morning, he told us that Bad Luck would be on temporary hiatus until Shindou-san came back. So, consider this to be an extended vacation.”
Hiro sat on the couch, still trying to comprehend what K had told him. He felt some anger and hurt that Shu had just up and left instead of coming to talk to him. Every time he had a problem with Yuki or just a problem in general, he always came to Hiro. It had sort of became their little tradition. And now, he had no clue as to where Shu had disappeared to. He sighed heavily and muttered, “I knew I shouldn’t have gotten out of bed today.”
A hand suddenly clasped his shoulder. He looked up to see Fujisaki smiling at him. “Don’t worry, Nakano-san. Shindou-san will come back. He just needs some time to get things sorted out. Bad Luck is as much his creation as yours – he would never leave you or the group behind.”
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Hiro let himself into his house, tossing his helmet onto the couch. Only 24 hours ago, they’d been on the top of the world with their having sold a million CDs. Not only was he back with Bad Luck, but he now had a date with Ayaka to look forward to. While that made him happy, he also felt guilty, knowing that Shu would never have his date with Yuki. He smiled, remembering how hard Shu had worked just to get that one date. Sometimes he wondered what it would be like if Shu had never met Yuki. Would things be normal? God knows then Shu wouldn’t have to worry about people trying to dictate his relationship…blaming him for every little thing that happened to the person he was dating. But on the other side of the coin, he knew Shu had become happier after he met Yuki, as though he had found the other half of his soul.
He walked over and picked up the phone. Since they now had time off, there was something that he wanted to do. He dialed the familiar number, waiting for her to pick up the phone. After a few minutes, he heard her answer. “Ayaka-chan, it’s me, Hiro.”
*************************************************************************************
Fujisaki absentmindedly ran his fingers along the keys of his keyboard. He was at a loss as to what to do, since they really had nothing pressing to do at the moment. Add to that an indefinite hiatus, and he was bored out of his skull.
He felt bad for Shindou-san. The guy had to be riding on a rollercoaster of emotions right now. First, Hiro had left the band, then they have the press conference announcing his departure from the group only to have Hiro end up coming back. To top it off, Sakuma-san had shown up, surprising them with the announcement that they had sold a million CDs. And then they get the news from K-san that Yuki-san had ended up in the hospital. And Fujisaki knew that somehow his cousin and his wife had something, however unintentional, to do with Shindou-san’s departure.
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Hiro hung up the phone, elated that his date with Ayaka would finally come true. He wanted nothing more than to tell Shu about this, but he wasn’t there. Walking over to his desk, he booted up his computer, the sudden urge to check his e-mail hitting him. When he logged on and saw the message waiting for him, he almost fell off of his chair. There sitting in his inbox was a message from Shu. Maybe now Hiro could finally discover why his best friend had just raced off like that.
His hand slightly shaking, he clicked on the message, fidgeting impatiently as he waited for it to load up. The message itself wasn’t very long, but he expected that from Shu.
Hiro,
By the time you probably read this, I’ll be long gone from Japan. I didn’t tell anyone that I was leaving because I just want some time to get my thoughts sorted out. And before you start, yes, I’ve been doing a lot of thinking. That seems to be all I’ve been doing since I left the hospital last night. Last night I overheard some things…hurtful as they were, they made me stop and really look at what’s been happening lately. And knowing you, I know that you’re probably mad at me for not telling you about it. But damn it, Hiro, I want to stand on my own for once! I’m tired of always going to you to help me solve things that I should on my own.
Right now, I don’t know where things stand with me and Yuki, but I will be back. It might take a few weeks or a month, but I will be back. Trust me, Hiro. That’s all I’m asking.
Shu
Hiro read the message again, making sure that he understood what Shu was saying. Damn, Shu! Was that what you thought you were? That you were just a burden to everyone? Yes, I was hurt that you didn’t come to me, but I’ve never viewed you as being a burden! His hands tightened as he realized that both K-san and Fujisaki had been right. How could they have placed all of the blame squarely on Shu’s shoulders? And now because of it, he was gone to who knew where. Picking up his phone, he dialed K-san’s number. “K-san, it’s Hiro. I just got an e-mail from Shu. You and Fujisaki were right – he did overhear something last night that made him bolt. He said not to worry, that he’d be back. Right now, he just wants some time to himself. Hell, after what happened last night, I’d say he damn well deserves it!”
Hanging up the phone once again, Hiro was assured that K-san would let everyone know about Shu’s message. He clicked the reply button and began typing his own e-mail to Shu, hoping that he’d see it and reply back. Right now, everything was up to Shu, and Hiro hoped that he would be okay.
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He kept hearing a continuous ringing that wouldn’t go away, no matter how much he tried to block it out. Finally, frustrated, he sat up on the bed and reached for the bedside telephone. “Hello?” he asked crossly, wanting nothing more than to go back to sleep.
“I’m sorry to disturb you, Eiri-san. I just wanted to let you know that I have some news about Shindou-san. It’s not much, but it’s all that I have.”
“Tell me what you know, Tohma.” His fingers tightened around the receiver, half afraid of what Tohma had to tell him.
“Nakano-san contacted K-san about an hour ago. It seems that he received an e-mail from Shindou-san. Apparently, the gist of his e-mail stated that he wouldn’t be gone for good. He just wants some time to think things out. And, Eiri-san, you might not take this well, but one of the things he said that he needs to think over is his relationship with you.”
Yuki had at first felt relief flow through him when Tohma said that Shuichi would be coming back. But his next words rocked him to his core. This had to be a joke, right? Shuichi couldn’t possibly be thinking of calling their relationship quits! This decision made no sense coming from the boy who had relentlessly pursued him, no matter where he went or what he did.
Tohma continued by saying, “If Shindou-san has sent Nakano-san an e-mail, then it’s probable that he sent you one as well. I am still trying to locate Shindou-san. I have my suspicions as to where he might have gone, as well as whom with.” He knew that Connor-san had mentioned that she would leave Japan this morning to go back to Florida, as she awaited his decision. If the timing of her departure coincided when Shindou-san was known to have withdrawn his account, then he would have a place to start looking.
“Thanks for letting me know, Tohma. Keep me updated if you find anything else out about Shuichi.” He hung up the phone, intent on going to his office. If he was lucky, then maybe Shuichi had written him. Hopefully the e-mail would explain why he had left. As he waited for his computer to load up, he lit a cigarette, hoping the nicotine would help to calm his suddenly jangled nerves. As he inhaled the acrid smoke, his mind kept wandering back to when he was in the hospital. If only he hadn’t said those things then maybe Shuichi would still be here. But as he thought over it, he knew that eventually Shuichi would have reached his breaking point. Maybe not today, but somewhere further on down the line it would have happened.
As he logged into his e-mail account, he felt a sense of dread, not knowing if he was going to like what he was about to see. And there it was, as Tohma had said it probably would be. Swallowing nervously, he clicked on the message. The hand holding his burning cigarette trembled slightly.
Dear Yuki,
Where do I begin to even start? I guess by now you’ve discovered that I’m gone. Are you happy now, Yuki? Your annoying nuisance is finally out of both your life and apartment. Yes, I overheard everything, Yuki. Do I have to tell you how much each of those words spoken hurt me or can you hazard a guess? I’m tired, so fucking tired, of being the only one who’s trying to make this relationship work. The hints that you could care less were supplied when you kept trying to leave me. But I guess that I was too much of an idiot to see it, huh?
I guess what I’m trying to say, Yuki, is that I’m not sure if I even want to continue this charade of a relationship or not. When I saw you in the hospital, I wanted nothing more than to stay. But I knew that I couldn’t. It’s not fair to either of us to stay in a relationship where we don’t know what the other wants. Right now I just want some time for myself, to get my thoughts in order. When I return, then we can discuss things. But right now I’m not sure if I can even bring myself to talk to you. Relationships are a two-way street, Yuki, and I’m tired of taking the flak for ours.
Goodbye, Yuki.
Shuichi
Yuki didn’t even notice that his cigarette had fallen from his suddenly numb fingers. It smoldered on the wooden floor, as it burned itself out. Was this how Shuichi really felt? God, why hadn’t he seen it coming?! Putting his head in his hands, he leaned on the desk, feeling more tired than when he’d gone to sleep earlier in the morning. How was he going to get Shuichi back now, when he wouldn’t even talk to him? The sudden buzzing of the doorbell interrupted his thoughts. Getting up out of his chair, he walked from his office to the front door. The door swung open to reveal his sister standing there. Saying nothing, he turned and walked into the living room, hearing the door close softly behind him.
Mika watched as her brother sat down on the couch. Her heart ached as she saw his haggard appearance. When Tohma called and told her that Shuichi had left, she couldn’t believe it. Guilt had flooded through her as she realized that he had indeed been outside of Eiri’s hospital door. Meaning that he had heard everything they had said. Her intention hadn’t been to hurt the boy. At the time she had truly thought that she was doing what was best for Eiri’s welfare. But looking at her brother now, she knew that he needed Shuichi in his life. The lost expression on his face spoke volumes to her. Taking a deep breath, she walked over and sat down next to her brother. “Eiri, I’m sorry. Tohma told me that Shuichi left. I didn’t mean for things to go this way.” Her voice faltered off as Yuki’s face turned towards her. The look on his face said that he blamed himself more than her.
“If you think you’re to blame then go read the e-mail that he sent. You’ll see who’s really to blame in all of this.”
Curious at his words, she got up and walked into his office. Sure enough, his computer sat there on the desk, an e-mail program up and running. Scanning over the quick message, her breathing hitched as she read the bitterness in its words. None of them had really known that this was how he felt. Wiping at the tears that suddenly dampened her face, she turned and walked back to the living room.
Yuki said nothing as she sat back down. After a few minutes he said, “You see what I’m talking about, now? I’m to blame for Shuichi leaving. I’ve managed to get him so fucked up that he doesn’t even want to talk to me!” He raked a hand through his hair, agitation coming off him in waves.
Before Mika could react, he suddenly shot up off of the couch. “Eiri, where are you going?!” she cried out.
Yuki didn’t bother to reply as he grabbed his keys and coat, the door slamming shut behind him. Mika felt the knot of worry in her throat grow as she worried about what her brother might do. Reaching into her purse, she pulled her cell phone out. “Tohma, it’s me. I’m at Eiri’s apartment now. He’s worrying me, Tohma. Shuichi did send him an e-mail…even I could read the pain in it! They both need each other right now, but I’m worried that Shuichi doesn’t even want to speak with him.” After listening to what Tohma was doing to locate Shuichi, she felt calmer. If anyone could find him, it was Tohma. “I hope that you can find Shuichi. Eiri stormed out of here a few minutes ago. He’s taken this to heart, blaming himself for Shuichi leaving like he did.” She hung up a few minutes later, feeling better after having called her husband. Gathering her things, she let herself out of the apartment. Eiri just needed some time to himself so he could calm down. She had to believe that he would be all right.
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He had no idea as to where he wanted to go. Cursing inwardly, he winced as he saw that he was at the entrance to the park. The place he and Shuichi had first met. Walking to one of the park benches, he sat down, just content to sit there and think. Shuichi’s e-mail had him worried. But he intended to reply to it, to let Shuichi know how he felt. That was if he didn’t delete it before he even read it. Rubbing a hand wearily across his eyes, Yuki wished he’d had the foresight to bring his cigarettes with him. He could definitely use one now to calm down. Knowing that was one thing that Shuichi wished he would do – quit smoking. Maybe it was time to prove to Shuichi that he could do it, for him. That would only leave one of his vices left, his drinking beer. But he would give both up if it would bring him back. He snorted softly. God, he was beginning to turn into a sap. What would his family think if they saw him like this? Of course, after the initial shock wore off, they’d be astounded to discover that he actually did have emotions.
Having calmed down somewhat, he got up off of the bench. If what Shuichi wanted was time, then he’d give him that. But he swore that as soon as Tohma found him, he’d be on the first plane to wherever he was. Opening the door to his apartment, he threw his coat across a chair, walking back towards his office. Noticing Mika’s absence, he was glad that she for once didn’t bother him about his problems. She was probably still feeling guilty about what happened at the hospital. Moving the mouse absently, he watched as the screen saver vanished only to be replaced by Shuichi’s e-mail. It still sat there taunting him, and he felt a bit of annoyance at that thought. Sitting down in the chair, he began to think over what he wanted to write. This was more important than a book he was publishing. The words he needed to type now would help to bring his lover back home.
He sat there, fingers poised to type, but nothing was coming to mind. How could words flow so easily from him when he was typing his books, but one email to his lover had him completely stumped? Snarling, he pushed away from the desk. Trying to calm down once again, he longingly looked at his pack of cigarettes that lay on his desk. Remembering his thoughts from the park, he left them laying there.
Coming back to the desk he sat down, inspiration suddenly hitting him. The sounds of keys clicking could be heard in the silent apartment.
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Chapter 3 preview: We now go see what Shu-chan's been up to since he left Yuki at the hospital.
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The Best You Never Had