Adult-FanFiction.org : Anime

Awakening	By : Demonic_Host Category: Pokemon > General Views: 19514 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 6
Disclaimer: I do not, nor have I ever, owned anything related to rights to Pokemon nor do I make money off of my fanfiction.

Chapter List
- 24
- 25
- 26
Heartfelt Interference
Chapter Twenty-five
Age Nineteen

You were apparently a much better liar than you would have ever thought. As you walked around in almost a daze while you tried to comprehend what exactly had transpired between you and your pokemon, it seemed as though your parents were none the wiser. Which was as much of a good thing as it was disconcerting. It meant that no one was going to have to face whatever moral or legal ramifications existed. But it also meant that either they didn't pay very much attention to you or you were that good at hiding things from them. Whatever the reasoning was for them not figuring out what had occurred, you moved around feeling as though you were in somewhat of a trance. Like reality hadn't completely sunk into your skull.

The way your pokemon carried on didn't help matters. It almost seemed as though nothing had changed. Which was a stark contrast to what you felt on the inside. You might have been putting on a good front in front of everyone else but inside your own mind it felt like you were being pulled apart at the seams the very moment the you even tried to contemplate all the particulars of what was going on with your life. Of course, not all of it was directly linked to that one night.

For one thing, you had in fact graduated from the training portion as you passed your nineteenth birthday. That marked you as being done with your education which meant you had a lot more free time. However it also meant that you had a year to decide what type of Pokémon you wanted to focus on if you wanted to stay on the ranch. Like your parents and all the others before you, you needed to decide your specialty. And you only had a year to decide the shape of the rest of your life. Now that might seem like a lot of time to sum but for you it felt like an ill fitting noose. With all of the distractions and serious issues a year didn't feel like enough time to choose where you wanted to be for the rest of your life. Of course half of that choice had been made for you by your eleven year old self but still…

You jumped slightly when you realized that you weren't quite as alone in your musings as you had started out. Torah had silently moved to sit beside you under the tree. He had a worried air about him. Especially when you didn't relax when you stared at him. After all there was very little room for secrets between people who had been as close as you and he were, less still when it came to the supernatural bond you shared with him. It wasn't just because of the fact that he was a psychic Pokémon, though that was half of it. You had figured out that half of the shared experience was because of what you could do.

It was true that he had connected your mind to his after he evolved but from what you figured out so far was that he merely latched on to the connection that you had unknowable been building with your own innate gifts. It was the same connection you made with all Pokémon that you got close to. It's what allowed you to communicate with them the way you did. Rorsh had just sped up the process and helped to not only strengthen what you'd formed but he had been the one to stretch your mind so that the connections were built much more rapidly as the years went on. The thing was that he had no idea you had put that together and you couldn't bring yourself to talk to him about anything recently given what had happened.

"I love you."

His words with their stiff sincerity started you. You weren't sure why it was so surprising to hear him make such a statement considering he had told you as much in the past. But there was something about how he said it that got to you.

"But I hurt you."

You stared at him. You felt something quiver in your chest as you saw the lost, frightened look in his eyes. He sat so stiffly that he almost seemed more like a hyper realistic statue rather than a living and breathing Pokémon.

"I've hurt you a lot. Every time I try to do anything, you end up in pain."

"I'm fine," you said in a surprisingly shaky voice. "It doesn't hurt anymore."

He had torn through your innocence with barely a consideration. And to top it off Rorsh hadn't been the only one that morning. Your body hadn't been used to one male entering into it much less three different ones. Despite your level of fitness and tolerance from working around the farm for the majority of your life there had been nothing to truly prepare you for the type of soreness and exhaustion that had followed.

"Your body can heal...but you still jump whenever someone gets near you."

That somehow broke the dam. Your eyes heated up and when you tore them away from his face you realized how blurry the rest of the world seemed.

"Wood doesn't swell in the heat," you mumbled swallowing thickly. "You made that drawer stick and I was still drowsy enough not to realize it. I trusted you but every chance you get, you use your powers to trap me...to trick me. Why?"

"If I don't, you run."

Hot salty liquid warmed your cheeks as you stared at the ground. You felt yourself shrink inwards as you wished that you could take back this moment of emotion. You had come out for some time of reflection. You hadn't come out only to end up crying.

"If I were human I would be able to hold your hand, to hug you. I would be able to stop you in a way you'd accept. But I don't have hands, I don't have arms. I have had to make do with what I have."

He was whispering to you, pleading. If it had been almost anything else you might have looked up and found the words to forgive him. But you couldn't do that just yet. The level of shame you felt was too much. You had given in to him in your mind. You remembered laying back it the grass and waited for him to make love to you like there wasn't any problems with that. And he had done just that - right up to the point that you had woken up. Then you had done something you would have never thought yourself capable of because he seemed to be in pain. Only when you thought that you could move on and pretend it didn't exist he proved you wrong. Rorsh had mounted you and continued to rut, leading two of your other Pokémon into following his example.

You weren't sure what was the worst thing about that situation honestly. He had gone against your wishes and when you were unprepared he had let two others do the same thing to you. Of course that last part wasn't entirely his fault. Nox and Ember were to blame for their own actions. It just felt like he had betrayed some moralist monogamous understanding that shouldn't have even existed to begin with. He was a pokemon and you were a human.

But you had enjoyed it.

You squeezed your eyes closed as that unbidden idea raced across your mind. No matter how true it was the level of shame that came with such a desire overrode what might have been a redeeming fact. You shouldn't have wanted another round once the three of them had been done but you had. You remembered what it felt like to be filled up and that made you wish that you could always feel like that. But you also remembered feeling their fur rub up and down your back. Physically it had felt divine but it also made you feel queasy thing about it.

You flinched when you felt Rorsh lick your cheeks, trying to clear up some of the tear stains. If he had been a man he could have used his thumbs but he wasn't and that was one of the problems.

"Stop."

Rorsh slowly sat back down on his hunches. The look on his face was full of rejection and the pain that came with it. But it wasn't like you could see anything clearly right now and he worked quickly on disguising his expressions.

"I can't do this Rorsh, I can't."

"Why? I love you. You love me."

"Not like that, not like you do. Not physically."

"Didn't it feel good?"

Even if he hadn't been a psychic Pokémon you couldn't lied to him. But at the same time you couldn't bring yourself to tell him how it had felt aloud. Nor could you summon the concentration to tell him privately either.

"I will always make sure that sex feels good for you too."

You choked at his promise. The implications behind it were staggering. Did he just expect you to go along with it?

"No. No more. I can't. If people found out...I'm supposed to be a breeder, I have to be respected... I can't…"

The irony of that wasn't lost on you even as you continued to let the tears escape. It was kind of cathartic actually. Despite the shit that was happening and had happened Rorsh wasn't treating you like you were a glass doll even as you cried in front of him. He knew you well enough to know your strength and knew that this was just another moment in life - that your tears weren't something you wanted to draw attention to.

"I told you that I will do whatever you need me to do for your job. As for your reputation - no one else ever needs to know our private business."

You laughed a broken laugh at that. He really did sound sincere which only made it worse. You knew that if he looked how he did when you and he were in the realm of dreams then there would be no issue. The fact of the matter was that he didn't; he looked like a pokémon because that's what he was. And the idea that you felt sick about it based on his body made you feel very vain indeed.

As you took a deep breath you tilted your head backwards, closing your eyes. The tears had slowed as you continued to talk with him, not that they'd come out quickly to begin with. You used your hands to wipe away what clung to your eyelashes and tried to dry out your cheeks a little bit. You felt Rorsh rub his cheek up against your shoulder affectionate but you still rolled your arm away which caused him to freeze.

"Please don't touch me," you said as you stood up. "I know that you love me Rorsh, but what happened wasn't okay. And I don't want it to happen again. Not with you, Ember, or Nox. Do you understand?"

Rorsh stood up on his four legs, putting him at level with your upper stomach. You avoided the look on his face when he took a half step back the moment you noticed that his tail was practically tucked between his legs. You knew that you'd hurt him but at the same time you had to have some sort of line. This just wasn't something that you were comfortable crossing - it didn't matter how good it felt if you ended up hating yourself afterwards.

"There you are."

You turned to look towards where you'd heard someone else's voice coming from. It didn't have the same feeling behind it that pokemon voices had so you instantly knew that it had come from an actual human. Felix moved up the hill without much effort. You doubted with the amount of muscle on his body that there was much that was difficult for him to do at this point. You were, however, surprised to see him out here. Normally he was working in the tall grass in the middle of the small forest with all of the poison type pokemon. In fact, the last time that you'd seen him for more than a few minutes at a time was when you'd trained underneath him. He hadn't lost his sharp edge in the last six years.

"What are you doing out here? Your parents have been looking for you," he said with an expression that practically demanded an answer.

"Is something wrong?" you immediately asked.

"Nothing that I know about. But you should hurry home to see what they wanted."
- 24
- 25
- 26
You need to be logged in to leave a review for this story.You need to be logged in to leave a review for this story.
Report Story

Awakening