Fight Me, Bite Me | By : Rhov Category: +. to F > Fairy Tail Views: 39446 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 3 |
Disclaimer: Fairy Tail is the property of Hiro Mashima. I make no money, I just do this for my own pleasure. |
Chapter 27
A Beloved and a Sweetheart
That evening, Natsu ate at Gray's house. Although Gray often cooked for himself, he had felt nervous, so he opted for a meal no one could possibly screw up: spaghetti. Still, he wanted it to be special. He spent the afternoon rolling meatballs and making a sauce from scratch rather than buying a jar of tomato sauce like he normally did.
Now, as Natsu swirled the pasta around his fork, Gray waited with anticipation. With his muscles all stiff, he watched Natsu take the first bite and chew.
"So, um…" He twisted nervously in his seat. "How's the food?"
"'S good," Natsu said with his mouth full.
"It's okay?" he asked, tensed up as he watched.
Natsu gulped down hard. "Yeah. Good." He heard Gray mutter something. Natsu hummed as he smelled nervousness. "You're not eating. Don't tell me you poisoned this," he teased.
"Wh-what?" Gray jolted. He looked down at his untouched silverware. "Oh! R-right." He plunged his fork into the spaghetti, stabbed a meatball, twisted it all around, and crammed it into his mouth. He had decided to make this dinner extra special by opening a wine bottle as well, and he sipped some of the fruity red chianti while keeping his eyes on Natsu.
The Dragon Slayer rested his cheek on his hand and smiled across the table. "You're staring at me."
"I wanted to make sure it was okay," Gray insisted. "I don't usually cook for other people. I mean, I know what I like, but I'm not sure about you. What do you think of it, really?"
"Honestly? The sauce is a little sweet."
"Oh! Sorr-…"
"No, it's fine," Natsu chuckled. "I make my spaghetti sauce with chili peppers, spice it up."
Gray cringed at the thought. Spicy spaghetti? "Yuck!"
That made Natsu laugh. He knew Gray hated spicy food. "This is how you like it, right?"
"Kind of, yeah," he said timidly.
Natsu nodded and ate some more. "It's good."
"I … I can make it different next time."
"Gray," Natsu said seriously. "If you don't like spicy stuff, don't make it spicy. If you cook something I don't like, believe me, I'll tell you. We'll figure out what we both enjoy. If you don't like the food, I won't enjoy it either."
"O-okay."
Why would Natsu say something like that? There were lots of things Gray didn't like but he knew Natsu loved them. They were polar opposites, after all. Finding something they both liked was damn hard! So how could he say he would not like food Gray did not enjoy? Did he only enjoy things that made Gray happy, too?
Gray realized this was almost exactly how he explained kinks to Natsu. He told the Dragon Slayer before, if Natsu did not enjoy and take pleasure in an activity, Gray himself would not be able to feed off of that pleasure and enjoy himself. He only got aroused by knowing Natsu was deriving pleasure from his sadistic play. Purely hurting another person was not arousing at all to Gray.
Was it the same for Natsu and this fluffy, sappy … whatever this was?
Natsu gulped down his food and suddenly looked across the table. "So, what are you feeling right now?"
His mind snapped out of a whirlwind of questions. "Huh?"
"You're staring at me again," Natsu said in amusement. "What are you feeling?"
"Uh … I don't know. Just glad you like it."
"What else?"
"I don't know!" he snapped.
Natsu smirked and egged him on. "Tell me."
"I … I really don't know." Gray was annoyed with that smug face. What was Natsu getting at?
The Dragon Slayer gave a soft sigh of exasperation. Gray was so damn cute! "This is romance, ya know."
"Ro-…? Oh. Okay."
Natsu laughed softly at his confused face. "You've never done this, have you?"
"I've cooked for people," he defended. "Usually it's just something for friends to eat, not really thinking about it."
"You put thought into this?"
Gray looked offended. "Well, yeah! Those are handmade meatballs, ya know."
Natsu just smiled. "That's romantic."
"Huh? How can cooking be romantic?"
"You're thinking about the person you care for, doing something specifically for them, something they'd enjoy. It's romantic when you put thought and energy into pleasing another person, right?"
Gray slouched back into his chair and glared to the side, muttering, "I'm used to pleasing people in other ways."
"Idiot. Relationships aren't just about sex. It can be something as simple as eating dinner at home. You can get just as much happiness making a meal for someone as you do giving them a good romp in bed."
"Oh," Gray said softly, gazing down at his plate. How the hell could food compare to sex? Then again, this was Natsu. Or … or was it true for other people? Was it just Gray who could not see how relationships could grow stronger without some sensual fun?
Natsu truly was amazed. He usually assumed that since Gray had more experience, he was an expert with romance. That made Natsu feel intimidated, so he kept quiet and let Gray take charge, assuming he knew best. This time, he saw the inner confusion in the ice wizard. He wanted to help Gray discover a new side to dating, something he obviously did not have much experience with.
Gray suddenly glared up defensively. "How do you know all this? I know you don't date around."
Natsu felt a slight pain in his heart. It seemed, just as Natsu assumed Gray was an expert, Gray also assumed Natsu was ignorant about love and dating. While that might be true in some ways, Natsu felt a little stung that Gray assumed his inexperience meant Natsu did not know anything about handling a relationship.
"Igneel taught me about courting."
"Your dad … a dragon … taught you how to date someone?" Gray asked in shock. "I mean, is this like the dragon-lust-spit-thingy?"
"Well, that's part of it." Natsu sipped wine to wash down the pasta. "As a kid, I wasn't around other humans much. Igneel realized I wasn't learning basic things that human kids learn through playing with other children, or in school, or with family. He taught me lots of stuff besides magic: reading, writing, morals, social interaction…"
"You hate to read, your penmanship is so illegible that Levy once mistook a message you wrote as an archaic form of the Bosco dialect, your sense of morality is questionable at best, and you suck at social interaction. Your idea of saying hello is to challenge a person to a fight."
"Hey, I was a kid! Not all of his lessons stuck with me. Still, he wanted me to grow up and find a mate some day. I thought love and romance was all cooties and gross," Natsu chuckled, "but somehow I remember those lessons. Igneel once told me that one day I would find a person who set a fire in my heart that no other magic could ignite, and it would make me burn up in a flame I couldn't extinguish."
What a typical simile for a fire dragon! "And you feel that way?"
A faint smile brightened Natsu's face. "Around you, yeah."
Gray stared silently until he realized he was not even breathing. He inhaled sharply through his nose, but he heard a snuffle. Dammit, what was wrong with him? Why was he getting all emotional over something so simple?
He glared down at the food. Spaghetti. Fucking plain spaghetti! After hearing that, he felt like he should have cooked shrimp fra diavolo campanelle.
"Gray?" Natsu worried that maybe saying that was too much. After all, Gray had issues with love. The ice wizard's head stayed down, and Natsu hesitated saying more. Then he saw the shimmer of a teardrop. His heart froze in dread. "Gray!"
"Ah … I…" He snuffled and used his napkin to frantically dab away the tears. "I don't know what to say to that."
Say? Natsu let out a soft sigh. Why did Gray always feel he had to reply with words? Natsu knew Gray had issues, and something that deep was not an easy thing to handle. Natsu personally had no clue how to help Gray with his issues. He really wished he knew what to do. Hell, he didn't even know how to deal with his own hangups, and there were depths of darkness in Natsu's heart that he still had not opened up. They were too painful to face. So he knew Gray's pain must be just as deep.
Darkness like that … Natsu wished he could burn it all away, yet first Gray had to be willing to open up the cage and let that dark beast out. For now, the best Natsu could do was take Gray's mind off of past agony and try to keep him in the present.
"Sheesh, you ice idiot! How many times do I have to tell you?"
"Show it, don't say it, I know," he sighed. Gray poked at his pasta but only bit into a small piece of tomato. Quietly, he confessed, "I … I never had anyone … tell me what to do. You know, when dating. My family died when I was really young, so I never had anyone explain these things. I figured out what sex was by listening to talk around the guild, and they're not the best role models. For a while, I thought dating and sleeping together were kind of the same thing. If you dated, you were supposed to have sex. I dated a few without all that, but … but most of them…"
He broke off his train of thought. Natsu did not need to hear about his dating history.
"I don't even know when I got into things like bondage. It was just sort of … there. A need. I don't even know why I like it. I just do. For a quick fuck, I don't care one way or the other, but if a relationship starts to get serious, I … I need it. I need to be the one in control of a situation like that."
"Of romance?" Natsu asked cautiously. He felt like Gray was slowly opening up to him at last.
"I guess. The thing is, I never met someone who really wanted bondage. A few … humored me, let me handcuff them. Nothing like what I really wanted. I couldn't fully take control, and as soon as I lost that control, the relationship crumbled. For a while, I thought I was messed up in the head. The lady at the sex shop set me straight, told me about being a Dominant, and let me read some books about it. Still, I couldn't find someone who was submissive." Gray gave a low chortle. "Hell, you're not even submissive."
That stung Natsu. He wondered if that was going to be a problem, but Gray still had a small smile.
"Still, you let me feel that need to control. You don't always obey me, but it's somehow more than enough. But right now," he whispered, shrinking back a bit, "I feel totally out of my element. I never needed to romance someone. I don't even know how. Pathetic, right?"
Natsu pouted at this confession. He began to open his mouth, but he closed it with doubts racing in his head. He wanted Gray to open that cage to the darkness in his heart, but he worried that this was a bad time. They were just beginning to reconcile. Was it really wise to deal with this matter at such a delicate time? However, he desperately wanted to help Gray with his issues, after Gray had done so much to help him.
"You told me once," he said softly, watching the ice wizard carefully, "everyone you ever said 'I love you' to died." Natsu saw the flinch of pain in Gray's face. Indeed, this issue was a delicate one. He felt guilty even bringing it up, but they needed to address it. "Maybe your need to control is your way of taking charge of your own feelings. Maybe…" He stopped his words. This might hurt Gray, but he had to point it out. "Maybe it's your way to hide from certain feelings, to distance yourself from…"
Gray shouted over his words, "Dammit, are you psychoanalyzing me?"
Natsu jolted back at the anger in Gray's eyes. He had crossed some line. Whatever Gray's issue was, that shout showed that he could not look at the darkness yet. He was still hiding from it. Natsu dropped his gaze, guilty that he had dug up something painful. Still…
"Makes sense, though, right?" He looked up stubbornly and saw Gray inch back, as if that darkness was a nightmarish beast staring him in the face. "I mean, my need to be restrained comes from that time. It's how I deal with it. So maybe it's the same for you. Your heart was badly scarred during Deliora's attack, you lost everyone you cared for."
"Natsu…" Gray shook his head, closing his eyes as those screams and the sight of blood on snow returned.
"So now, you feel like you have to keep a firm control over your heart. Right?"
Gray slumped and looked aside. Those memories pained him. "Maybe something like that," Gray whispered. "I don't trust my emotions. Never have since that day. I want to control them, not let them control me. Imagine being a kid and losing everything, absolutely everything: family, friends, neighbors, classmates, teachers, your whole goddamn village, every single person who you have ever known in your entire life. Imagine being helpless and seeing all of Fairy Tail massacred, ripped apart, smashed to bloody pieces until you can't even tell who the person used to be. Imagine every single one of them dying, from Makarov down to Romeo and Wendy, everyone! And yet you're left alive. All you have left of them are memories of their screams echoing through your head." Tears hovered on his eyelids, and Gray quickly blinked them away. "That's what happened that day. I lost everyone I knew, everyone I … that I … loved." Gray hugged himself and shivered at saying the word. His heart was racing and burning. "I … I don't like … thinking about it."
Natsu nodded. He needed to back off this time. Still, the cage to that darkness had cracked open a little. That was a start.
"I … I had to bury my heart, take control of my feelings, ice away the pain. Otherwise, I wouldn't have survived. I need that control."
"But you let me take control," Natsu said hesitantly. "At least a few times. Why? If it hurts so bad, why do you let me?"
Gray shrugged. "I trust you. I know where we stand." He eyed Natsu up and down with a flirtatious smirk, trying to press aside the darkness and bury it once more. "And you're damn hot when you take charge."
Natsu blushed brightly and looked down. "Uh … thanks. But, are you okay with that?" He knew Gray wanted to bury the darkness again, but Natsu was still worried. "You said when you lost control, the relationships crumbled. I don't want that to happen between us. If you truly don't want me to take control…"
"It's fine between us, really. In the past, it was usually the girl forcing her own will over me. She'd want payback and wouldn't let me have control at all. I don't like that. I'd get scared of confessing to the things I like to do, afraid she'd think I was sick in the head for wanting BDSM, and it would put a wall between us. I came up with the Checklist of Fucking as a way to see how tall that wall had to be, where my boundaries were. Almost every serious partner hated that list. It chased many of them right out of the house. The ones who stayed said no to almost everything really kinky, or they would agree and immediately change their mind. You said yes to almost everything, and the things you said no to are things I'm not all that interested in. I can deal with your limits, and you're cool with mine. When it works that well, there are hardly any substantial boundaries. That means we're closer, I'm able to really open up, you're fine with most of my kinks. I know where we stand, so I don't mind losing control once in a while. To me, it's more like I let you take control, which is controlling in itself. I … I really like … when I can lose myself to you," he admitted hesitantly, flustered by admitting that. "I was never that comfortable with anyone else. Only you. Maybe because we've known each other for years, we've fought each other and fought back to back. We're like brothers."
Natsu's eyes widened at that. Like brothers?
"So," Gray smiled, "I can trust you. I can let you take control, because I know you'll give it back when I really need it."
"Thanks. I … I just wish I could take control more often. Knowing you like it makes me want to do more, but I know I can't. Not for a while, at least. Someday, I hope."
Gray reached across the table and held Natsu's fingers. "Someday, you will," he said with utter confidence.
Natsu wished he felt as assured as Gray sounded. He still had his own issues and dark depths he feared to open. "Would … would you want that? You know, me … um … topping?"
"Yes," Gray said instantly with a tenseness in his throat as he tried to hold back his desire to grab Natsu, slam him against this table, and ravage him. Or let Natsu be the one doing the taking. Or stroke each other off. He didn't care! However, he saw conflict in the Dragon Slayer's face.
Natsu dropped his eyes. How did a discussion about their hangups lead to this? He smelled the hormones rising within Gray, and the smell made him want to react as well. However, Natsu was still not in the mood. Just that morning, he had woken up with tears on his pillow. Now, deep in his heart, he wanted to escape before he slipped back into a pattern of covering over their issues with sex. It was easy to run away from pain and hide it with pleasure, or to let physical pain mask emotional pain. Natsu did not want Gray to hide anymore, and he did not want to hide away from his own darkness. He could not face it yet, but he did not want to use sex just to mask his emotions.
With a blush, he mumbled, "Supposed to be a romantic dinner, yet we're talkin' about sex again."
Gray jolted. "Oh! Sorry!" Shit, I'm ruining it! The conversation had steered away from romance and back onto the same carnal path they always took.
"No, we need more time to just talk."
Still, Gray feared Natsu might leave if things seemed about to heat up, so he squeezed those fiery fingers. "Like this is fine, too, right? Just eating, no talking."
Natsu stared ambivalently, wanting to say no. No, it wasn't fine to keep hiding their emotions from one another. However, before he could ask Gray to face his issues, Natsu knew he had his own secret, something he still had not told Gray, something so dark, it made him sick just briefly thinking about it. He could not expect Gray to face his demons when he could not even let himself silently think about that.
"It's in your hands tonight, Natsu."
The Dragon Slayer jolted out of his morbid thoughts, and a chill ran over his skin. "What?" he gasped.
"You've always been the one in control when it comes to romantic things."
Natsu smiled with a slight sigh of relief. "Yeah." That's what he meant. In control, not literally in his hands. The disturbing scene of the past melted away, leaving Natsu with a sickening realization.
For how much he loved Gray, he was not ready to fully open up to him. Not about that, at least.
Natsu grabbed his fork up again and ate a meatball. It really was too sweet, but it was just a unique flavor, not repulsive, just different from normal. "If you're bad at romance and addicted to sex, I'll have to show you how to have a good time outside of your kinky bedroom play. You've done really good tonight, especially with making food this delicious."
Hearing Natsu praise his cooking made warmth spread through Gray's chest. He looked at his spaghetti. He had been swirling it mindlessly while talking, and now his fork had a massive clump that he could never fit into his mouth. He eased his fork out of the mess and started again, twirling slower.
"Maybe you're right," Gray muttered. "Maybe I'm addicted to sex. It's an escape, a way to get out of the chaos. Escape from sadness, anger … my own frustrations."
Natsu looked up, shocked yet relieved that Gray had figured that much out for himself. At least he recognized that he was using sex to escape.
"It became … thoughtless," Gray muttered. "I'd take some nameless girl to bed, work through my emotions, wake up the next morning, and I didn't have to worry about her. It was a one-night-stand, and we both knew it. No attachments. Damn," he cringed. "That makes me sound like a slut."
"It doesn't, Gray."
"I mean," he interrupted quickly, "I've had serious relationships too, but … but they never lasted. Three months tops. Then I was back to hitting up bars. I never really stopped to … to think about what I wanted in a relationship. Not deeply. Just having fun. Someone cute, someone amusing. I'm not used to taking it truly serious. I'm … not used … to romance. Sheesh, I'm making myself sound like an asshole. Sorry."
"You are an asshole."
Gray glared icily. "Gee, thanks!"
"But it works out, ya know. You're all about sex and uncertain on romance. I prefer romantic nights and I'm hesitant about sex. It works for us. Now, are we done with having a serious conversation?"
"Oh hell yes!"
"Good. I'm hungry. I wanna eat your sweet spaghetti."
"It's not really sweet, idiot. It's the fresh basil."
"And sweet onions."
"Huh?"
"You used sweet onions. I can smell them. I like sweet onions. Never thought about using them in a pasta sauce."
"Sweet … onions? I just grabbed the same onions I always get."
"Well, they're the sweet variety. It's good, so shut up and let me eat." Natsu shoveled noodles into his mouth and slurped them up noisily.
Gray watched in amusement at how heartily Natsu could eat. He devoured everything on his plate, and then asked for seconds. They drank a whole bottle of wine between them. The alcohol put a slight haze on the night, and Gray felt the heat hit his cheeks. Before he knew it, he threw off his shirt, feeling too hot.
He looked at Natsu again. Their plates were empty. They had only the wine to finish. Seeing Natsu hold a wineglass was … weird? Out of character? Sexy, though. Really damn sexy! He was a destructive pyromaniac, but there were times when Natsu seemed like he could easily take his place amongst royalty.
Gray chuckled to himself. He had read Sorcerer Magazine articles that called him "the Ice Prince," and the last magazine which featured Natsu called the pyromaniac "the Dragon Prince."
Two princes! Damn funny.
Natsu had leaned back a bit, sipping wine and relaxing. For him, it was nice to be back in Gray's home. He liked the smell, even if the walking icicle turned the air conditioner way too cold. They had built memories here, and he liked to think back on those times. The past two weeks had been hell, but now those days of angst seemed to melt away.
He really had thought he lost Gray. Those feelings of sadness and anger were hard to overcome, but being back here, eating dinner with Gray, made him want to forget all the hardships they went through.
"Do you … um…"
Gray's nervous words brought Natsu out of his reminiscence. "What?"
"No," he muttered. "I don't want to push it."
Natsu emptied the wineglass and set it down. "Tell me," he ordered.
Gray's fist kept clenching and relaxing with nervousness. "Do you … maybe … want to stay the night?" He looked over and saw Natsu's eyes grow large. "N-not sex!" he cried out frantically. "I know you don't want that, so … I…" His face tensed up, his brow wrinkled, and his lips began to quiver from the strain in them. Softly, he muttered, "I don't want you to go."
He felt like if Natsu went home tonight, it would all end up having been a dream. He wanted Natsu there, with him, all night long, just to reassure himself that this was real.
"Dammit!" Gray seethed.
Why was he feeling this desperate? He felt totally out of control, completely out of his league, and it terrified him. He wanted control, but he could not think of any way to regain that sense of mental stability without resorting to his usual kinkiness. How could he possibly control romance?
Natsu sighed as he saw the confusion in Gray's face. He knew the issue. Gray was not his dominant self, and after all they had talked about that night, Natsu knew that the role of a dominant was something that made Gray comfortable. It was a mask, but it was a bandage that helped him as his heart healed. Natsu wanted Gray to be more open and natural, but he respected Gray's need to keep control over his chaotic emotions.
How could he allow Gray to regain that?
"Sit on the couch," he said. "Then call me over to you."
Gray looked stunned. What the hell was this about? However, he got up and walked to the couch. He sat and faced Natsu. Suddenly, he realized what this was. Ordering!
In a low and seductive voice, Gray ordered, "Come here." He watched intensely as Natsu stood, walked over, stopped just in front of Gray, and waited for another command. "Sit by me." With that order, Natsu obediently sat beside him. "Lean in more." Natsu did, and Gray suddenly grasped him around the shoulders, yanking Natsu into a hug. "Thank you," he whispered. As simple as that, Natsu had let him take control again.
"Is this better?" Natsu asked.
"Yes, now shut up."
Natsu smiled silently. If Gray wanted him to act a little submissive, he could play that role. He let Gray hold him and kept obediently silent.
"Stay here tonight," he said, stroking Natsu's hair. Gray planted a kiss on that hot forehead. "I want to cuddle you through the night. I don't want you to go yet."
Natsu smiled at hearing how this was no longer a worried request, but a firm demand. He was glad to hear Gray back to normal. "Okay, kainushi."
"Don't call me that. Not tonight. I'm not your owner tonight."
Natsu looked up into his eyes. "Can I call you sweetheart?"
Gray's cheeks went crimson. "Don't," he mumbled. Natsu began to chuckle, and Gray glared down at him. "What?"
"The way you're blushing. I normally don't see you like this."
"Yeah," snapped Gray. "Because normally I'm in control."
"Exactly. Too in control. This is more like we're equals." Natsu stroked Gray's face and gave him a peck on the lips. "It's nice to see you like this."
Gray gave a petulant sigh and looked away. "Thanks … I guess." He grumbled the last bit, still frowning with averted eyes. Natsu burst out in a bombastic laugh. "What!"
Natsu had to settle his laughs before he could talk. "Happy once said he thought you were a tsundere uke. Right now, you're acting like one."
Gray's eyes grew huge. A … a what? "Shut up!" He shoved Natsu aside.
Natsu laughed as he saw even more embarrassment. He tackled Gray back, and they wrestled playfully. Gray's jeans went flying in the scuffle. Suddenly, Natsu pinned Gray flat down on the couch. He grinned victoriously, but as he looked down, Natsu felt his heart skip. Gray was panting from their play, looking up with his cheeks flushed. Natsu felt a twitch in his pants. It stunned him, how easy it was to feel sexually attracted all over again.
"I … I wouldn't mind," Natsu mumbled.
"What?" Gray snapped.
"You acting like an uke."
"No way!" Gray tried to struggle again.
Natsu easily kept him pinned. "Come on," he urged. "Say something cute."
"Go to hell!"
"Do you realize, saying that really makes you sound like a tsundere."
"Natsu!"
Suddenly, the Dragon Slayer got off of him and sat normally. Gray quickly sat up and settled slightly more to his side of the couch, arms folded sullenly. Stupid flame-brain! Just as he was feeling in control again, that idiot had to mess it all up.
Mostly, Gray hated it because part of him liked falling into a submissive role when under those piercing eyes. He had never felt this way before in his life.
"Gray?"
"Shut up! I'm not talking to you."
So like a tsundere! But Natsu decided not to say anything about that out loud. "Should I sleep on the couch? Or maybe go home? If I messed things up, I can leave."
"N-no!" He still desperately wanted Natsu to be with him.
"The wine is making me drowsy. I'd like to stay up and cuddle on the couch, but I really need to go to bed. I don't have anything to change into."
"Oh! I'm sure I have a shirt and clean boxers you can wear."
Gray hurried to the bedroom. Natsu followed slower. Gray had been tense all day, racing to do things, catering to Natsu as quickly as possible. Even during dinner, he refilled Natsu's wineglass before Natsu even needed to ask. Natsu realized Gray was urgently trying to make up for shouting so harshly and causing the rift between them. It was actually a bit endearing to watch, although it made Natsu feel guilty.
By the time Natsu made it into the bedroom, Gray already had a shirt and some blue boxers pulled out.
"I still have your toothbrush here," he said. "You take the bathroom first. I need to clear away the dishes."
Natsu took the clothes and went into the bathroom. Nothing had changed. Not like he expected Gray's house to change in just three days, but it felt like an eternity since he had been in here. After all, Gray was living with Natsu for a while.
As Natsu undressed, he looked at the shower. Memories of that first night returned to him. Gray had been harsh that first time, not prepping Natsu at all. He was horny and needed fulfillment right away. Natsu had lost his virginity in that shower, pinned against the wall, looking out the tiny window that allowed steam to vent. He could still remember the pain of Gray thrusting into him.
Then he remembered another time in that shower. He had meant to just watch Gray masturbate, but he ended up pinning Gray against the wall and thrusting against his back, humping against him until Natsu came. It was the closest he had come to being a seme. He still shivered at the thought of coming inside something, but that night allowed him to take charge.
Natsu had stripped from his clothes and looked down to see himself erect. He cursed and tried to think of something else. If he was normal, he would simply rub this out and go to bed. Yet Natsu was not normal, and he knew that. He had issues, even after two months of dating Gray and making some progress. The mere thought of stroking himself to completion made him think of other things, nightmarish scenes, memories that made him want to vomit…
And that sickness killed his boner, like it always did.
He dressed, brushed his teeth, and stepped out. Gray was sitting on the bed, already dressed in pajama pants—not naked this time, Natsu noted. He was shocked Gray even owned some pajamas; probably something he only wore on missions, since Erza would pound him if he slept naked all the time.
"Do they fit?" Again, Gray was so attentive, it warmed Natsu's heart.
"A little loose, but that's fine, better than being tight." Natsu figured Gray would go immediately into the bathroom, so he wondered why the ice wizard kept staring so hard. "What? What's wrong? Do I have toothpaste on my face?"
Gray jolted. "No, nothing. It's just … seeing you wear my clothes … it's kind of nice."
Natsu could hardly help but laugh. "Oh God! You're like a guy who has never dated before."
"Hey!" Gray snapped. "I never let girls wear my clothes. This is a first for me, so shut up." He slouched down angrily, and then he glanced over again as Natsu walked around the bed. "It … it looks good on you," he mumbled.
"Thanks. Maybe I'll keep it."
"Oh hell no! I like that shirt, and those are brand new boxers."
"I'm gonna get some water. Go piss."
Natsu walked out of the room, smiling to himself as he decided not to mention how utterly tsundere Gray was acting. When he came back with a cup of water to sip in the night, Gray was on the bed and staring at the ceiling.
"Scoot over," Natsu said, sitting down and rolling onto his side. However, Gray turned off the lamp and rolled onto his side as well. Their noses were right next to each other.
"Roll over," Gray ordered. "I want to cuddle you."
"I wanna cuddle you."
"I'm doing the cuddling tonight."
"Screw you! Roll around, popcicle pants."
"I'm not moving, ash-for-brains."
"Fine! We'll face each other."
"Fine!" Gray gazed at Natsu in the moonlight. Being this close, he could feel the heat radiating all through the covers. He felt the steamy air exhaled through Natsu's nose. It tickled his lips, making him want to taste that fiery mouth. Instead, to distract himself, he grumbled, "Your breath is hot."
"Yours is cold." Natsu felt the air from Gray chilling his lips, making him want to warm them up. "C-can I give you a goodnight kiss?"
Gray thought he would never ask. "Yeah."
Natsu leaned his head forward on the pillow and pressed his lips against Gray's. He had meant to only give one, but the feel of those cold lips tingled. He needed another, and he leaned in again, kissing longer this time. Hesitantly, Gray's hand reached over and threaded his fingers in Natsu's hand. The Dragon Slayer gave a squeeze back, then pulled his lips away with a smile. He wanted more, but he worried that this was bound to lead to something else. Although his anger had mostly subsided, he still did not feel up to kinks.
Gray saw that tiny bit of wistfulness in Natsu's eyes, and it defeated the restraint he had been struggling with all evening. He suddenly grabbed Natsu, yanked him close, and kissed him so roughly, Natsu cried out.
"G-Gray!"
He felt Natsu struggling, so Gray rolled over, shoved Natsu flat on his back, and pinned his hands down, squeezing his fingers as they held hands. Natsu could have fought him off, but Gray was glad he didn't. He thrust his tongue in, and Natsu's tongue was right there waiting. That spicy, cinnamon taste was back, and Gray shuddered with a chill that went beyond his own ice magic.
Natsu wiggled his hands out of Gray's hold, but instead of shoving him aside, he wrapped his arms around Gray, stroking over the taut back and shoulder muscles, warming the chilly skin with his touches. As their tongues clashed, he loved Gray's minty taste, with hints of wine, tomato sauce, and toothpaste all mixed in. A tear slipped from the corner of his eye. He was overjoyed at having Gray back, but he was also sad that he was losing his resolve so quickly. How pathetic!
Gray leaned up, panting, with a string of saliva connecting his lip to Natsu's. The Dragon Slayer's cheeks were flushed with passion, but Gray saw the gleam of a fallen tear. He backed off, cooling his passion. For how desperately he wanted this to continue, Natsu's words from that afternoon haunted him.
'You're addicted to sex, not me. If you were addicted to me, you'd respect my boundaries. You wouldn't try to force me to do things I don't want. You wouldn't keep pushing this matter just because you're horny.'
He wanted to prove to Natsu that these feelings in his heart went beyond carnal lust, so he laid back onto his pillow and tried to will away his erection.
Natsu rolled over, stunned and worried. Was the kiss bad? Why had Gray looked angry?
"Sorry," Gray whispered. "I promised."
Oh! So was he mad at himself for losing control?
"It's all right," Natsu assured. "I needed to be kissed like that."
Gray chuckled softly. God, he had wanted to do a lot more than just kiss!
Natsu burrowed his head into Gray's chest and wrapped an arm around him. "Can we stay just like this?"
So … damn … cute! He wrapped his arms around Natsu and held him tightly. "Yeah. Just like this."
They laid in bed silently, with only the sound of crickets in the background. However, Gray realized Natsu was not sleeping. He pulled back and saw the Dragon Slayer's green eyes shining in the starlight.
"Go to sleep," he urged.
"You first," Natsu said.
"I don't want to."
"Why not?"
Gray stroked Natsu's cheek. "I want to keep watching you. I want to watch you sleep all night long."
"That's creepy, Gray."
"I don't care."
"Fine! I'm going to bed." Natsu slammed his eyes shut. After a minute, he peeked an eye open and still saw those droopy eyes gazing at him. "Really, it's creepy. Close your eyes."
"Then I can't watch you fall asleep."
"I can't fall asleep if you're staring at me like that."
"Too bad," Gray smirked.
"Fine!" Natsu flipped around hard.
"Hey!"
"Cuddle me," he demanded. "But you're not staring at my face all night."
Gray shook his head. What a stubborn boyfriend! He spooned into Natsu and kissed the back of his neck. He felt the shiver that trembled through Natsu's body, and it made Gray chuckle silently.
"You're cold," Natsu grumbled.
"You're hot."
"Your feet are like ice cubes."
"Your body heat is making me sweat already."
Natsu reached to Gray's hand and pulled it tighter to increase the firmness of that embrace. Softly and sleepily, he whispered, "I love you."
Intense relief made Gray relax. He felt like he had been waiting all day to hear those words again. He nuzzled into Natsu's neck and breathed into his ear. "I missed you. Sweet dreams."
Natsu smiled to himself and squeezed Gray's hand. "You too."
Although Gray liked the idea of watching Natsu all night, he fell asleep rather soon, warm and cuddled around the Dragon Slayer. His dreams involved him and Natsu on a secluded beach, something about a dripping ice cream, and devolving into passion as Natsu licked the sticky, sweet dessert melting over Gray's skin. He could feel the heat of that tongue, first just on his fingers, then as Gray let the ice cream drip elsewhere on purpose, that tongue followed. Just as it was getting really good, he woke up … hard as a rock!
He rolled over and saw Natsu sound asleep. Gray did not want to bother him, so he tried to ease himself out of bed despite the stiffness in his pajama pants.
Natsu snorted as he felt a shift in the bed. "Gray?" he mumbled.
"Just going to the bathroom."
"Mmnh." Immediately, Natsu was back to sleep.
Gray walked out of the bedroom and into the bathroom. He stripped out of his clothes in an instant and looked down at the troublesome organ. Slight erections could be willed away, but that dream had been truly erotic. There was nothing Gray could do but work this out. He put some lotion on his hand to slick himself so this would go faster, and then he set up a rhythm to his wrist.
He had not masturbated in a while, not alone at least. There was that time when Natsu watched him. Oh God, that had been hot! Gray knew he was an exhibitionist, and he absolutely loved when those narrow eyes were focused on him. The way Natsu stared so hard, how those eyes could burn right into his soul, made Gray shudder. Just remembering it sent a jolt through him, and he groaned as he swelled up in his hand.
He gulped down the moaning sound. He had to keep quiet. Natsu's hearing was ridiculously sharp, so Gray tried not to moan, and even tried not to breathe too heavily. He moved over to the shower, ready to just let go whenever it happened, and he could wash it down the drain. He rested his head against the cool tiles and looked down at his fingers stroking the turgid erection.
His breathing was getting heavier. He thought about his dream, making love on the beach, and let himself think of thrusting into the furnace-like ass. He would pound into Natsu. Or … had Natsu been the one to top in the dream? When he woke up, it was unclear. Did it even matter? Him on top or Natsu, either would be a load of erotic fun.
But for now, he thought about that ass just waiting to be reconquered. It was not just about sex, but Gray still craved that fiery body. He wanted to tame his dragon, conquer him, ravage him.
"Oh God," he whispered. He was so close. His hearing faded, and he closed his eyes, knowing he was drawing up to an end.
Suddenly, a rough hand grabbed Gray's cock, immediately matching his fingers. Gray jolted, stunned out of his climax, and realized Natsu had sneaked into the bathroom.
"You're an idiot," the Dragon Slayer said in a low, sultry voice. Natsu's hand stroked up, then swiped across the leaking head. He held a drop of pre-cum on his fingertip and brought it up to show Gray the moistness. "Don't you think I can smell this?" He rammed the finger into Gray's mouth, making him taste the bitterness.
Gray tried to pull away from the taste of his own pre-cum, but Natsu was right against him, caging him in. All he could do was lick the finger clean and suck on it erotically. Finally, the finger pulled out, and Natsu reached down, lightly stroking Gray's balls.
"Oh … God!" Gray shuddered at the hot touch. "I thought you didn't want to do anything."
"That's right," Natsu whispered, sounding slightly irritated, "but you're gonna do this anyway. If you're going to do it, I don't want you to do it without me. I don't like the idea of you pleasuring yourself without me around to watch."
Gray shivered at the possessiveness in Natsu's voice. "Y-you don't have to. If you don't want…"
"Shut up," Natsu snapped, and he stroked Gray so firmly, the Ice-Make wizard cried out in bliss. "Don't you think I want to do this? Don't you realize I've been wanting it for two weeks?" he snarled. "Finally, I can feel you with my own hand. God, I missed this."
"But you told me…"
"I was mad," Natsu shouted over him, and his hand heated up until Gray shouted in erotic pain. "I'm mad you pushed me away, and I'm mad that I didn't understand why. Mad at myself, mad at you for doing it, mad that we're both such idiots. I can't have sex with you when I'm mad, but I can do this much. I want to do this much!"
He stroked from base to tip, and Gray felt his balls drawing up.
"Ahhn! Natsu!"
"I need to feel you," the Dragon Slayer muttered, his voice edged with desperation. "I didn't want tonight to be all about sex, but … God, I'm so messed up over you. It's also not fair. You wanted to repay me, but I haven't done anything to repay you. I'm the idiot who messed up and scared you. It was my fault. I made you feel like you had to push me away, because I can't control myself. I don't want to control myself. You love control. I hate it." He leaned up into Gray's ear and panted heavily, "I wanna lose control around you."
That voice was deep and sinful. Gray clawed into the tile, feeling everything drawing up, when suddenly Natsu's hand let go. Gray cried out. Right on the cusp of release, Natsu had quit.
"What? No!"
"Shut up." Natsu wrapped his arms around Gray, hugging him tightly. "I missed you."
Although Gray was glad, his cock was burning with need. "Natsu!"
"Punishment!" he snapped, and he clutched tighter to Gray's naked body.
Gray felt like collapsing. What? Punishment? He was so frustrated, he could cry. His cock ached, he could not loosen up, and Natsu's broad arms made reaching around to finish the job impossible.
"Come on!" he whined.
"Shut up. I just wanna hold you for a little while."
"Natsu," Gray whimpered. Dammit, he needed to come!
"Does it hurt?" the Dragon Slayer asked sadistically.
"Really bad," Gray admitted. He felt like a tourniquet had been wrapped around his balls.
"Good."
Gray's head collapsed against the tiles in defeat. Natsu was showing him just how addicted to sex he really was, and it was a painful lesson to learn. He stared down at the purple flush to his cockhead. "Fine! I'll take your punishment."
Natsu chuckled and licked the rim of Gray's ear. "I'm not that sadistic," he whispered. "I just like to hold you." He nuzzled into Gray's neck, nipping his skin. "And I wanna touch you."
Natsu reached back down and slowly stroked Gray. The friction spiked through him, and Gray felt himself tremble.
"I'm sorry I was mad, Gray. It wasn't fair."
"I get it," he assured, wanting to lose himself to these touches. "We both screwed up. I shouldn't have said it that way, and you should have been more careful, but I shouldn't have put you in that situ-…"
Before he could make his accusation, he felt intense heat from those fingers. Gray's words choked off as a groan and a scream garbled in his throat, only to get choked off as Gray tried to hold back so he would not wake the neighbors.
"You once wanted to make me into a sex slave." Natsu leaned in close and spoke hotly into Gray's ear. "Who's the slave to sex here?"
Gray could not hold back a shuddering moan. To let go of control, to fall back into that hot chest and give everything over to Natsu … a slave. A submissive role? How could that be so alluring to a dominant like Gray?
"Maybe I should get you a collar."
"No more," Gray pleaded. That voice was too much. Those low, sensual words made his need to release intensify, but Natsu's hand stroked him too slowly. Gray realized Natsu was timing his pace to keep Gray hovering on the brink of climaxing. Was this something Natsu himself had perfected, how to stay aroused without releasing?
"I'm still mad," Natsu whispered in a fiery threat. "I don't want you to touch me, but I desperately need to touch you. That's not fair. I almost don't want you to come. Just wanna keep touching you…" His nose ruffled Gray's hair. "…smelling you…" He lightly bit Gray's neck, right over where the bite from earlier had scabbed over. The pain across that sensitive area made Gray cry out. "…and listening to you moan for me." Then Natsu looked at the scabs. "You once said you didn't want scars. I'm sorry about this." He licked the scabs and kissed the bruised skin around it. "I'll make it up to you. I'm still mad you broke my heart like that, but maybe I can make it up to you by giving you what you want."
"Heh! I'm not going to complain," Gray panted, sweating as his body was tortured with sexual need.
Natsu bit Gray's earlobe and whispered, "You better not."
His hand sped up, and Gray felt fulfillment pulse through him.
"You were daydreaming about me, right?" Natsu smiled smugly. "What were you thinking about while pleasuring yourself?"
"A … a dream."
"A naughty one?" Natsu asked in amusement. "Tell me about it."
He flinched as the intensity of the pleasure increased with memories of that dream. "A beach," he panted. "You and me … all alone. You were … ahhhn … were licking me. Oh God, Natsu!"
Gray was so close, so goddamn close. He needed release with a desperation he had never felt before in his life, but Natsu was keeping him from reaching that plateau. Gray almost wanted to beg him. It hurt … so good!
"Licking you, huh?" Natsu said in amusement, using his sense of smell to keep Gray on that libidinal ledge. "Do you like when I lick you?"
"God, yes!" Gray moaned. "I miss your hand, your body, your mouth. Everything! Your hand is really rough, though."
"Do you not like it?"
"'Course I do," he growled.
"Oh? You like my rough hand? Maybe you're a bit of a masochist yourself."
Gray glared around his shoulder. "Just because I like how you touch me doesn't make me a…"
Natsu's hand jerked on him hard, so aggressive that it hurt, but the pain ignited a deeper level of pleasure. Gray finally gave up and surrendered the last threads of control.
"I … oh God … I need it, Natsu. God, please! Let me come already."
Instead, Natsu's wrist came to a stop, still gripping him, but not moving. Natsu whispered into Gray's ear, "No. I'm not done playing."
Gray's knees trembled from the agonizing tenseness in his muscles. "Please."
"I haven't gotten to touch you in two weeks. Do you really think I'm going to let you finish this so soon?"
"Please!" Gray sobbed.
"I'm not done," Natsu said calmly. "I want to feel your cock more." He gave a languid stroke. "I also miss feeling … here!"
Suddenly, Natsu rammed his finger into Gray's ass. The pain shocked him.
"Goddammit, lick your finger first," he shouted. "Ugh … nngh … hurts."
"Good," Natsu whispered with sadistic pleasure. "This is payback for doing me with no prep and no lube my first time. It was right here in this shower, too, just like this. Hurt like a bitch. That wasn't very nice of you, treating a virgin so roughly."
"S-sorry," he muttered.
"Next time, you better be more gentle. If you're rough with me…" Natsu pressed his finger up harder, and Gray groaned at the discomfort. "…I'll be rough with you. But if you're gentle…" He eased his finger back, spit down onto it, and rubbed in more carefully. "…I can be gentle, too. Do you like when I'm gentle with you, Gray?"
Gray could only nod his head. Natsu probed gingerly, not getting any rougher than that. The pain melted, and pleasure was left behind. Intense pleasure! Gray suddenly realized how his sadistic play could feel so good to a masochist like Natsu. The pain made the other pleasurable sensations so much stronger.
"N- … Na- … -tsu … fuck!"
"Should I let you come now?" he asked in simmering amusement.
"Please!"
"All right, I won't be cruel. After all, you're my sweetheart."
His … sweetheart?
Lovers. Boyfriends. A beloved and a sweetheart.
Natsu's hand moved with aggressive speed, but this time he did not slow down. He stroked with purpose, and his finger in Gray's ass suddenly found the spot it sought out. Gray cried out and arched back against the burning chest. Natsu could smell the scent of arousal reaching an apex. His nose rubbed against Gray's skin, inhaling the sweetness of that aroma.
Natsu's voice was like a flame to spark a firework. "Come for me, Gray."
That was all it took to ignite the explosion. Gray shivered and huffed out moan after moan as an intense orgasm shook his whole body and soul. Everything, all that pressure, so much built up lust, gushed out all at once. He heard the moist shot hit the tile wall, and he felt Natsu's fingers get wet from the cum leaking down. He went suddenly weak, but Natsu braced him up with his rock-hard body. Gray leaned into him, letting Natsu support him. That torturous hand stroked slower, milking him. Then as Gray got sensitive, Natsu's fingers let go and pulled away, dripping with cum.
"Feel better?"
Gray had to laugh in exhaustion, but he admitted, "Yeah. Lots better."
"I can't cook as good as you, but maybe this is enough to show I'm sorry."
Gray turned around with an exhausted smile. "Best damn apology I've ever received!"
He saw that Natsu had a stiff pole tenting his own blue boxers. Gray had just bought these boxers last week, and now there was a small wet spot on the tip of that large mast. What a way to inaugurate his underwear!
"Um … Gray?"
The ice wizard looked up eagerly. After such a deliciously tormenting hand job, he wanted to suck Natsu off. He craved to feel that hardness pound his throat and taste the saltiness of Natsu's hot cum.
"Um … can you…?"
Gray rubbed Natsu's arm, encouraging him to break down his stubbornness and just ask. He smiled with understanding. After all, Natsu was a proud man. Admitting he needed help to take care of his erection was probably difficult for someone like him. Gray wanted Natsu to know, even if he had an issue with masturbating, he could turn to his boyfriend for any help at all.
"Can you … make me breakfast in the morning?"
Gray blinked in momentary confusion. Huh? Food? Goddammit, this is about food? Huge … letdown! "Stupid Natsu!"
"Huh? What? What'd I say?"
"I thought you were going to ask something else."
"Something…?" Natsu saw Gray eying his crotch and quickly understood. "I said I don't want it yet."
"I know," Gray whined, "but it's a good mood and … and I … um … wouldn't mind." Wouldn't mind? Hell, he wanted to yank those boxers right off and devour Natsu's cock.
Natsu shook his head in disapproval. "You're really a horny bitch-in-heat, ya know."
Gray pouted and looked aside as he realized he was getting scolded. "Yeah…" he muttered. "Is that a problem?"
Natsu laughed. "Nah!"
"Are you really not in the mood? I could suck you off."
"I'm not. I mean, I know I'm hard, but I just … I don't want it. I don't feel like coming."
"It's fine."
Natsu glared at him. "You always say it's fine."
"Because it's fine," Gray shrugged. "Wash your hand. You're dripping cum everywhere."
"Your fault. You're messy."
Natsu took his cum-covered hand to the sink and began to scrub it while Gray used toilet paper to wipe himself clean. Then he washed the streaking drips of semen off the shower wall.
"Look, I knew from the beginning, you don't always like to come. That's fine. It's just how you are."
"But it's different this time," Natsu mumbled as he watched stringy cum of bubbly soap swirl down the sink drain.
"Well, the reason is slightly different, but in general it's the same. You're mad. You don't like to come because of some angry memories. This time, you're angry at me." He turned off the shower, walked up behind Natsu at the sink, and looked over the Dragon Slayer's shoulder to their reflection in the mirror. "I'm just glad you want to be close again. For a while, I really was worried that you'd make me wait months until we could properly court one another."
Natsu pouted. "Would you break up with me if I did?"
Gray smirked with a low, seductive chuckle. "No, but I don't think I'd last long before tying you up and forcefully ravaging you."
Natsu glared fiercely. "Don't joke about that."
Gray's laugh caught in his throat. "Oh shit! Sorry. You know I wouldn't."
"I know," Natsu whispered, still looking troubled.
Gray's light joke had stirred something dark in the back of Natsu's mind. Just as the darkness threatened to surge forth, Gray's icy embrace squeezed Natsu and crushed the shadows, freezing them back into their depths.
"No one will hurt you, but if I'm the one who hurts you, you know what to say to make me stop. I promise, I will stop."
"I know you will. I trust you. Let's just cuddle, okay?"
Gray relaxed and nodded. He pulled away and began to head for the door.
"Gray?"
He turned around, but before he could ask "What?", lips forced themselves on his. Gray immediately grabbed Natsu, and their tongues clashed in a wild kiss. Natsu's hands glided up Gray's bare back, and then suddenly clawed down sharply. Gray cried out in pain.
"Marking you," Natsu snarled. He dived in and attacked Gray's neck, sucking on him while feeling the cold body shiver. "Claiming you!"
"God, you're wild!"
Suddenly, Gray grabbed Natsu's shoulders and slammed him against the wall.
"I want to claim you too, bastard." He scraped his teeth over Natsu's exposed neck, right where it met the shoulder, and sucked up a purplish-red hickey. Natsu whimpered as he felt himself getting marked. His neck was so sensitive, so many bad memories involving people strangling his neck, but Gray only made him feel pleasure in that area.
Happy with his love mark, Gray kissed Natsu deeply, and those hot hands grabbed the ice wizard's ass to pull him in tighter. Gray felt the erection pressed between them, and he undulated his hips to entice that needy cock.
"Nnngh … Gray … Gray, no." Natsu gently pushed on Gray's chest. "Not tonight. Dammit, I want it, but … but not tonight."
"Will you be able to sleep with that?" he asked, nodding down the Natsu's erection.
"It'll go away. Come back to bed."
"Y-yeah. Just give me a minute."
Natsu nodded, realizing they both needed a little separation or they would never stop. He walked back to the bedroom and laid down. His crotch hurt, but he only lightly stroked it. He closed his eyes and focused. His hand only took off the needy edge. Its slow pace eased the desire while satisfying a craving to be touched. With that, he let out a slow breath, and his body began to relax. As his muscles loosened, the erection shrank down. It tingled to lose it this way, but Natsu was used to this sort of pain.
In the bathroom, Gray leaned against the wall, trying to convince his cock to go right back down again.
"Damn him, he's sexy!" he whispered, only later realizing Natsu probably heard him.
Gray let out a long, slow exhale. Then, as the hormones went back to normal levels, he chuckled to himself. It did not take long at all for them to get back into this situation. He wanted to make his boyfriend happy, make up for his unthinking words, and go back to the closeness they had before. Soon—very soon—he wanted to tell all of his friends. The thought made him smile.
Just how was the guild going to react to Fire and Ice being together?
Gray finally walked back to the bedroom and crawled under the covers. Natsu instantly wrapped his arms around Gray.
"My turn to cuddle you. Roll your naked butt over," he ordered.
'Still aggressive, eh?' Oddly enough, Gray liked that aggressiveness tonight.
Natsu sighed with contentment. "G'night, sweetheart."
"Seriously, don't you dare call me sweetheart in public."
"But in private, like this?"
Gray's cheeks were on fire again, and he grumbled, "It's … fine … I guess."
Natsu smiled at such an adorable attitude. He kissed the back of Gray's neck. "Good night, sweetheart."
"Good night … my beloved."
Natsu let out a sigh of happiness and closed his eyes to sleep.
End of Chapter 27
A/N: Gray's dream of the dripping ice cream is straight out of my Gratsu fanfic "Taste My Ice Cream." Ironically, in that story, Gray is a masochist.
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