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Utopia	By : FlayraDowitcher Category: +G to L > Hetalia: Axis Powers Views: 2991 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia. I am making no money off of this fic.

Chapter List
- 27
- 28
- 29
***Okay folks! There's only about two chapters left in Utopia! Yes, it's coming an end! Special thanks to my beta for her hard work! Read and review please!
***Warnings: Violence, dark themes, language, humor, angst
***Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia. I am making no money off of this fic.
'If I a man could pass through Paradise in a dream
And have a flower presented to him as a pledge that his soul
Had really been there, and if he found that flower in his hand when he awoke—
Aye, and what then?'- S. T. Colerdige, Anima Poetae

Chapter 27: Secrets In Stone
Feliciano took a moment to silently enjoy the afterglow of his orgasm, leaning against Ludwig's strong chest like a ragdoll. Ludwig had fallen asleep immediately after his own completion. Feliciano couldn't help but tilt his head to gaze upon the strong sleeping features of the most handsome face he had ever seen. After all of this was over he was going to have a fuck-fest with his mate. Right after his orgasm he thought about how he wanted to reset all of his trials, pains, horrors and suffering so that he could live a normal life with his lover. It wouldn't be as easy as that though; finding the 'reset' button on a human being or creature was a hopeless wish. Plus there was no telling how they would all be after they face the Fiends for this (hopefully) final showdown.
By dawn the group was up to continue on their way with everyone in the same formation. Feliciano had taken to riding on Sadiq as well, finding that his legs were always getting tired or achy. Ludwig didn't complain, nor did Sadiq. The sprites continued to follow them all around as they moved through the woods. There was something off about the group though, and Feliciano was feeling the extreme sadness, fear and jealous aura that was growing thicker by the mile. Taking a peek at everyone he noticed one of them was not in their original formation. Looking behind he noticed how slow Alfred was moving, how he was falling behind with his wings dragging limply behind him like he had all the sadness of the world on his shoulders. Furrowing his brows, Feliciano slid from Sadiq's back and trotted to walk beside Alfred, telling the others to just keep moving. Alfred didn't seem to take notice of him or if he did then the demon didn't care. Feliciano searched the demons features for any signs of sadness only to find them in the cornflower blue eyes. He also took notice of how the pupils were narrowed into slits. Something was bothering his friend.
"Do you want to talk about it?" Feliciano asked, feeling the jewel in his chest start to grow warm as he reached out to the suffering soul.
"What is there to talk about?" Alfred snapped. "I'm sorry," he sighed. "That was rude of me."
Feliciano followed his gaze to see that Alfred was staring at both Ivan and Gilbert. The two demons were walking side-by-side. "Did something happen?" He whispered.
"They fucked last night." Alfred answered harshly. "Right in front of everyone." He sneered through his teeth. "They thought no one was watching! Ha! I know the smell of Ivan's arousal anywhere. I can't tell you how many times he's come to my house through the window, throw the covers off and fuck me hard without relent. He's chosen Gilbert. I know that without a doubt in my mind."
Feliciano tried to think of the proper words to say before speaking them. "Maybe that is for the better. Now all three of you can move on from this."
"But you know what's worse? As angry as I am at Ivan and Gilbert, it is YOU who I am most angry at!"
Feliciano almost crumbled under Alfred's hard glare. "W-why me?" He whispered.
"None of this would have happened if Ludwig hadn't had cast me aside that night two hundred some years ago! I worked long and hard to break through those stone barriers of his and when I finally did he fucked me and left me. Just like that. After feeling so embarrassed and ashamed of myself I moved in on the first person who wanted me, and that person was Ivan. He said he admired me from afar. He said that we would make a wonderful demon pair. I believed him. And then fucking Gilbert had to enter the picture and screw it all up for me! So why am I angry at you? I'll tell you why. If I had won Ludwig over that night, you wouldn't be his mate and I wouldn't have fallen for Ivan! And now I have to watch you and him together, thinking about how that COULD have been me instead of you, which would have saved me from all this heartbreak! I hate it!"
"Alfred…something is wrong with you. It has to do with you being in this realm. It's destroying you! This is not the Alfred we all know and love! I ask that you try to contain your harsh feelings until we are out of this realm where you can have a clear head again. Please, don't do anything rash."
Alfred turned to him. "I'll try not to."
The conversation with Alfred left him with a bad feeling in his gut and an equally terrible one in his mouth. There was so much hate and anger radiating from Alfred that he began to fear for the demon's mental health more than ever. They were going up against the Fiends, creatures whom feed off of fear, confusion, doubt, anger and hate. What if the power of the Fiends make Alfred lose his mind? What would the others do to him? He decided to confide in Ludwig about this matter yet he was already certain he knew what the answer was.
"We would kill him, of course." Ludwig whispered to him while the group was taking a rest by the river bank they soon had to cross.
"Why? There is a chance we can save him!" He whispered back.
"Not while we are here in this place. Our duty is to defeat the Fiends. If Alfred, or Ivan for that matter, stand in our way we have to fight them, which will end with death."
Amber eyes welled up with tears. "I don't want to see that happen."
"Both Alfred and Ivan would ask for death. They would rather die than know they had completely lost their minds. We need to honor them in that respect, all the while keeping you and the rest of us safe. I will let nothing stand in our way of victory. I want us all to be free. To live our own lives again. Let's worry about the Fiends and less about Alfred, okay?" He kissed Feli's temple.
Feliciano nodded. What other option did he have? His hands were tied.
Now there was the issue of crossing the large black river without being able to fly. Most of them could swim, save for Ludwig at the moment. Arthur stopped them from entering the water with his staff. "Something is not right." He said out loud. "Everyone wait a moment. I need to explore these murky depths first."
"Why?" Asked Ivan. "What could be in there?"
"Very big fish?" Feliciano joked.
"Oh, there's fish alright." Arthur assured them. "I just need to know what kind." He felt Francis' hand on his shoulder. "I'll be fine, love." He whispered to his lover.
"Take care of yourself. I hate when you have to do all this and I can't help." He watched as Arthur transformed his bottom half into a fishtail before slipping into the water and disappearing under it depths.
"He can make himself a mermaid?" Feliciano gasped in shock. "That's so cool! I wanna be a mermaid too!"
"Mer-MAN." Francis corrected him.
Gilbert crossed his arms with a smirk. 'I'd say Feli was right on the money.' Francis glared at him
Within the watery depths the murkiness of the black river was making vision scarce so he let a soft glow of light surround him. There wasn't much to see so far, the river bottom was slick with algae and other substances. Whatever water creatures lived in this river his light frightened them away. Most were small, average looking fish-like creatures. Still, there was something else within these depths that had his magic sensors going off. He wasn't sure how long the river actually was, so perhaps whatever creature dwells here in the deep was too far away. They could only hope. Arthur swam along the bottom until he happened upon a strange darkening of the water before him. Inching slowly forward he noticed that the river bottom dropped to a dark ravine. Curious as to the strange structure, Arthur swam down the depths to see what it was. He never expected to find an opening at the very bottom. Swimming to it he could see that the large square hole was decorated with tiles and designs. This was obviously a secret entrance to somewhere else, but why down here in the depths of the river? From inside he could sense powerful dark magic. Examining the tiles and carved pictures up close he was surprised to find three beings as the main designs. There were words encrypted so he took a few minutes to translate them, finding that it read 'All Fiends Enter'. It made sense now. This must be an entrance into the lair of the Fiends! Their lair is in the mountains but there was nothing ever said about an entrance on land. This was an ancient structure, one he was both frightened and eager to explore.
Then came a strange bubbling sound from inside the entrance. Arthur listened closely, sensing the dark presence from before and the power was growing stronger. Whatever it is, it was coming this way! The bubbles grew numerous, meaning it was coming to the surface! Frightened, Arthur swam up the ravine and hid behind a boulder, dimming the light around him to keep whatever it was from seeing him. Peeking down at the entrance he could barely see what it is, but something was slithering out of the dark hole. Arthur's eyes widened at the black eel-like shape of the creature, which was massive in size. The width of the hole was wide enough for two grown men to swim down it side-by-side, yet this creature filled it up! It could swallow them whole. Perhaps this was a monster that guarded the entrance to their lair? This was a problem, a big problem. The obvious answer would be to just cross the river and continue on to the mountains but that was assuming the Fiends had an entrance there. They may be expecting their party to arrive at the mountain so they can attack easily, but if they were to sneak up from this way then Feliciano may have an easier chance of destroying them quickly.
The creature was swimming up the ravine now, its full length out from the entrance and nearing the top. Arthur could see it clearer now although most of its features were blurred from the murky water. It resembled that of a large oarfish only its face was human like, with a pointed nose and sharp grinning teeth. Upon its long body were stubby little legs with webbed feet. Arthur watched in silent fear as the creature passed right by him, its body slithering like an eel as it moved through the water, slowly disappearing out of sight into the murky haze. Once the tip of the tail was gone, Arthur let out the breath he was holding. There was only one way this could be done, which would involve him using much of his magic to transform all the others with fishtails, the same as he. Arthur would have to depend on the fighting abilities of his demon companions to make it through that entrance. It would be a very long swim, and a dangerous one at that but it was worth the risk. This was not in his calculations.
Reappearing to the party, he told them of the entrance, of the monster and what they must do to reach the Fiend's lair. Not all of them agreed with his plan.
"Two of us should explore the entrance first." Offered Ivan, crossing his arms. "Why risk the rest of the group if we have no clue where this place takes us, or what we will find further in."
'I agree with Ivan.' Gilbert seconded. 'Who's to say there aren't more of those monsters down there?'
"Silence! All of you!" Ludwig spoke from his spot against a boulder. "We all go in together." He looked over at Feliciano seated beside him. "We can't risk some going in and possibly never coming out again. Feliciano will need all of us to help him, especially the other Accused Nations."
Kiku came over to stand on the other side of Ludwig. "I agree with Ludwig. We all go in together." Everyone was exchanging glances.
Alfred spoke up next. "Can't we just hunt this monster and kill it?"
Arthur shook his head. "There's no chance we'd find it. The water is pitch black from our view, Alfred. That monster is also black. I have never seen anything like it. A massive eel-like beast with the face of a man that could swallow all of us one after the other." He turned serious. "If you were to lay all of us out in a line on our backs, head to feet, we'd be about the same length of that monster. And there is one other thing," he held up a finger "It is a very, very ancient beast." He spoke with a breath. "Perhaps even older than the Dark One. How does one kill an ancient beast? How does one kill a god?"
"You can't." Sadiq added.
Arthur nodded slowly. "This is our best chance at reaching the Fiends unnoticed. If we continue to move on land we can be spotted, or they may very well be waiting for us at the mountain." He looked over at Feliciano, who was frightened and shaking against Ludwig. "Feliciano will need all the help he can get."
"So how do we do this?" Ivan asked. "How do we swim the length of those woods?" He pointed over the river to where the mountains stood. "It's a good long swim, all that way." He smirked.
"Arthur will make us all like him." Francis answered. "We'll have fish bottoms."
"What about me?" Ludwig asked Arthur. "Will I be able to swim in my condition with these merman traits of yours?"
Arthur nodded. "Yes, you will be able to move on your own. But all of you will need to lose your wings for this for it will slow you down. Now give me some time to concentrate."
Feliciano was frightened to go into the black water after hearing about the monster dwelling within it. He couldn't even enjoy being a merman with his light green fishtail, the same as all the others. Both he and Ludwig had to swim in the middle, Ivan and Sadiq in the back, and the rest in the front with Arthur leading the way. The water was thick and cold, it felt like a thousand little icy hands were pinching at his skin. They all had to follow Arthur's glow along the river floor. Feliciano held on tight to Ludwig's good hand, sharing a smile with his mate. This was nice, swimming together as mermen, like something out of a fairytale! Too bad it was an idea torn from him when they dove deeper down to find the entrance. Feliciano pressed himself closer to Ludwig. Arthur went in first, followed by Gilbert, Alfred, Francis, Kiku, then he and Ludwig. Sadiq and Ivan were meant to stay in the back should the monster come back to its lair. Arthur assured them that he would sense the monster's approach, so for the moment they were safe.
The water was thicker in the long tunnel, having the sticky feel of molasses or syrup. They all moved with expert grace through it, still following Arthur's glow. The tunnel was simple rock and nothing more. Feliciano briefly wondered how such a structure was made. The tunnel seemed to go on forever with only a few twists and turns. Then came a horrible echoing in the water, its vibrations felt throughout the tunnel walls. Everyone stopped first to listen and then looked at Arthur. Arthur's eyes slowly widened. Ivan and Sadiq turned to look behind them, inching themselves forward to see if there was anything following them. From behind came a faded white human looking face turning one of the corners of the tunnel. Everyone could see it now from where they floated as the face glowed white, lighting up the area. Something wiggled out of the black eyes and the mouth opened to show large teeth with a white tongue. It screamed in the water, echoing off the tunnel walls and forcing hands to ears.
They swam!
The beast was gaining on them, pushing itself along the walls with his feet to slide along quickly. Feliciano could feel himself losing his wits at the sight of the frightening beast that was gaining on them. He squeezed Ludwig's hand as they both swam with as much speed and strength they could muster. There was no telling when the tunnel would end. Feliciano looked back to see the white face, almost like a mask, barreling its way closer to them. It left Sadiq and Ivan no time to actually draw weapons and fight it, nor was there enough room in the tunnel for combat. Now the beast was closer! Feliciano could see the little wiggling worms that were sprouting from the sockets and the deep, cavernous like mouth amongst long shark teeth. It would swallow them whole! Unable to swim anymore, Feliciano gave in to his paralyzing terror and screamed. The jewel in his chest burst with light towards the beast, suddenly stopping it in its movements. Feliciano floated helplessly in the water for he too was stunned and numb from the power of the jewel. The monster could only slip away, backing itself up through the tunnel to escape from the light.
Ludwig grabbed Feliciano's wrist to pull him along through the water, urging the others to keep going while the jewel still burned brightly. 'Gods above, but is there no end to this tunnel?' Ludwig thought to himself. If Feliciano's light were to fade the monster could continue after them. So onward they swam until they finally reached a mighty opening leading into a large cavern of bright blue water. Everything was seen clearly now; even the water was fresh and they shook the muck from their bodies. The water also helped Feliciano to regain his senses and gasp back to life, searching frantically for signs of the monster. Ludwig silently assures him that they were safe and brought his mate into an embrace. Arthur pointed upwards to the surface sparkling with bright light. Everyone made their way to it. They were not expecting to find what they saw above them.
"It's beautiful!" Feliciano gasped at the sparkling crystals all around them as they crawled onto the silvery bank.
"Can we take some of it?" Sadiq asked eagerly, eyeing up the biggest ones.
"To think," Arthur began, using his magic to return them all back to normal. "That we had just come from that shit hole to this beautiful place. We were lucky to have escaped that monster."
"But where are we?" Francis asked, catching a glimpse of himself in the crystals and watching as his reflection was magnified separately in each one. "I like it here!" He made kissy lips at his reflection.
Ludwig was looking at the water for any other signs of the monster. "Do you think that monster will follow us here?"
"Not likely." Arthur said, shaking some water out of his ear. "Although I don't suggest us staying idle for too long. Francis! Have some humility!" He scolded his lover.
Ivan had already walked on a little further to see where the cavern led. "It's just another cavern we have to walk." He told the others.
"But we must be in the mountains by now." Kiku mentioned.
Feliciano touched one of the crystals. "How could the Fiends make something so beautiful like this?"
"This has always been." Sadiq answered, turning himself back into a horse for Ludwig.
"They took the good places to live." Alfred mentioned, sneering at his reflection.
Gilbert helped Ludwig onto Sadiq's back. 'I suggest we don't touch or take anything from this place. It might be magical. No need to curse ourselves or anything.'
"Right. We must keep moving." Sadi Arthur a moment before there was the echo from the monster beneath the water. "And right now would be the best time!"

Their journey through the crystal caverns was a wonderful experience for the reflections often showed them of happier times in their lives when they were human. It did hold some magical elements. Each of them could feel and remember the loving embrace of a mother, the proud words of a father, gentle caresses from a lover, a pat on the head to a pet or the merriment of being with siblings. It had been so long since any of them had felt such peace, and once far enough away from the water they took a rest to further indulge in the happy moments. Arthur and Francis were the only ones not focused on the crystals, talking amongst themselves.
Kiku had wandered off a little bit further as he felt the presence of something good, like an invisible force was pulling him further into the cavern. It was a positive feeling, one that had his enlightened powers glowing on their own. Upon finding the source of this pull he knew immediately what it was. Running back to the others he gave his hands a clap to arouse their attention. "Everyone, listen to me! I have found something that will be of great use to us! Mainly Ludwig, Gilbert, Ivan and Alfred!"
"What did you find?" Ludwig asked him.
"Please, come with me." Kiku led them to a crystal clear pool of water. The kitsune knelt down before it, cupping some of the water in his hands. He brought it over for the others to see. "It is a special kind of purity pool. It has healing powers."
Feliciano gasped. "Will it heal Ludwig's wounds?"
Kiku gave a smile and nodded. "I believe it will."
'So can we all us it?' Sadiq asked. 'Will it heal our demon wounds?'
"Sadly, no. Those are wounds you are cursed with. This water will heal all current wounds and troubles, mentally and physically. Sadiq, bring Ludwig to the water first. I shall prove that it works."
Gilbert and Ivan helped to carry Ludwig over to the pool of water. Kiku went into the water as well to help them guide the demon gently to sit on the bottom, submerging Ludwig's whole body in the water. Gently, Kiku pressed Ludwig's head under the water as well. When he let Ludwig emerge everyone was eager to see how it had worked, if at all.
Feliciano watched on, hopeful that his lover would suddenly walk out of the water all by himself. His wish was granted! Tears welled in his eyes as Ludwig suddenly walked out of the water and onto the bank, standing tall and strong once again. Everything on him was restored, healed and working. Ludwig spread his wings and shook his tail. Feliciano let out a joyous cry and ran to his lover with the tears pouring down his face.
"Ludwig! You're all better!" Feliciano sobbed into his chest.
"I am." Ludwig smiled himself. "It feels damn good, too. I won't have to ride on that big horses' ass anymore."
Sadiq transformed back. "See if I ever help you again!"
Gilbert ran to hug his brother next. 'Brother! It's good to see you up and well! It was hurting me to see you suffering so, and you know I would have gladly taken on your pain if I could.'
Ludwig nodded to his brother. "Then go into that water, Gilbert, and restore your tongue. I never thought I'd say this, but I have missed hearing your true voice."
Gilbert grinned, going over to the water and sticking his head in. He opened his mouth to suck the water in and out. There was something warm and ticklish in his mouth. Lifting his head from the water, Gilbert got back on his feet, turned to the others, and with the largest grin he could muster, he spoke, "I'M BACK, BABY!" Everyone cheered for him.
Then it was Ivan's turn. He jumped into the water, hoping to only heal his body and grow back his wings. While all of those things were granted to him, there was something else the water had helped with, just as Kiku said it would. Ivan resurfaced from the water, slicking his hair back to face his comrades with a smile; and not just any smile but his usual childish one with a happy tint of pink on his cheeks. "Hello friends! It's so nice to see all of you again like this!" He hurried out of the water and pulled Sadiq and Francis into a hug. "All of us are one big happy family again, yes?"
"Oh stars above…he's back!" Sadiq said with a groan.
"Now that just leaves Alfred." Arthur said, turning to the demon that was standing behind them, trying to slink away.
"I don't want to go into that water!" He sneered.
'Please brother! Please! I'm begging you!'
"Shut up, Mattie!" He covered his ears.
Feliciano slowly walked up to him, smiling sweetly, as if he were approaching a wild animal. "It's okay, Alfred. It's not going to hurt you. I'll even go in with you." Alfred growled.
"Feli, be careful." Ludwig warned him.
Ivan went over to help Feliciano. "Alfred, would you like me to go with you too? I'm not angry anymore! I'm happy again, and you can be too!" Ivan held out his hand to him but Alfred batted it away.
"LEAVE ME ALONE!" He screeched. "I don't want to be happy! There's no point in it! I have nothing to be happy about and it will only make me sad again!" He lifted himself into the air with his wings, making sure his talons were showing in warning of attack. "I won't do it, so back the fuck off!"
"We're losing him." Francis whispered to Arthur.
"Be ready to defend yourself." He whispered back.
"Hold on." Ludwig surprised them by pushing past Ivan and Feli. He looked up at Alfred, focusing on the angry face and not the angry talons. "Alfred," he was answered by an eagles cry. "I'm sorry for how I treated you all those years ago. I took advantage of you because I could, which I shouldn't have done." Alfred lowered himself back to the ground, looking at him with a confused expression. "I'm sorry that it happened. I took something from you that I can never give back." Alfred took a step back. "But if you go into that pool, I promise that you will not have to feel this way any more." He held out his hand to Alfred. "Come on, then."
Everyone watched silently as Alfred took Ludwig's hand, keeping eye-contact with each other as they approached the pool. Alfred hesitated for a moment but a gentle shove from Ludwig had the demon stepping into the clear water. Unable to resist its pull, Alfred let himself go under, gliding along the bottom, past Kiku, and coming back around to resurface. When he opened his eyes to see his friends he made not one sound. They were all staring anxiously at him. Clenching his eyes and face tight, he could not longer contain his smile and shouted, 'YAHOOOOOO' at the ceiling. "ALL HAIL THE CONQURING HERO!"
Alfred flew out of the water to land in front of Ivan and Gilbert. He looked upon them both, puffed out his chest and gave a proud smirk. "I suppose we can continue to share Ivan on good terms."
Gilbert wrapped an arm around Ivan's shoulder. "I'm willing to be much more civil about it. After all this shit we've been through, fighting with you seems so trivial."
Ivan hopped from foot to foot. "I'm worth fighting over!" He stopped and grinned with his shark teeth. "Now, if only you two would start to 'perform' with each other in front of me I shall be the happiest demon on the block!"
"Do you want me to drown you in that pool?" Gilbert joked and Alfred gave his trademark 'ha ha ha ha!' laugh.
Arthur stood off to the side with Francis, watching the merriment between all seven of them and sighed heavily. "I wish it didn't come to this." He whispered to Francis.
"Why? We should be grateful that everyone is happy again. Why can't you be happy for them?"
Arthur looked at him seriously. "Because there will be no real happiness in the hours to come. I fear that this little bit of happiness they found once again will only enhance the trouble they will face when fighting the Fiends. As I said before, something terrible is going to happen to them. All of them, except for Feliciano."
Francis placed his hands on Arthur's shoulders, slowly feeling himself start to lose his temper with his lover. "What are you talking about? You speak as if you know they are going to die!" Arthur didn't answer him and Francis' jaw dropped. "You think they're going to die?"
"Oh, it will happen. I plan on it. But before you kill me, Francis, or hate me forever, allow me to further speak of my plan. Already the Dark One has made it into this realm and is coming after us as we speak. I sense it. I plan to have the Dark One help to defeat the last two Fiends since I can't rely on Feliciano's powers alone, especially with that bubble-head wielding them! Feliciano will need help. I'm gambling on the Dark One to both destroy life and give it. I will say no more than that." He pushed Francis away from him. "A terrible storm is coming, my love," he smirked. "And should my gamble come to fail, then at least you and I are the ones who will survive."

He always loved the snow. Feliciano was running through the snow covered street towards a large black castle. It was Christmas Eve, one of his most favorite times of the year! He was eager to see all of his friends and enjoy the merriment of the holiday season with them. In his cake carrier was a freshly made Tira Misu round cake, one of his favorites! Everyone was eagerly awaiting his arrival to try the cake. But when he got to the castle he found no decorations, no merriment and worse of all, no friends. Where were they? Slowly he wandered his way through the dark halls, calling out the names of his friends but receiving no answers. Feeling dread and deep sorrow, Feliciano feared the worst for his friends, knowing that something was terribly wrong. Dropping the cake he tore through the halls, screaming now for his friends to appear; and they did.
Feliciano stood before a massacre of bodies; not just any corpses but those of his friends each lying in a puddle of their own dark red blood. Only one still stood among the bodies, which was Ludwig. Smiling in relief through his tears, Feliciano ran around the bodies of his fallen friends to embrace Ludwig from behind. 'Ludwig! Thank goodness you're okay! What happened to everyone?'
'You happened to them.' Ludwig answered flatly.
Feliciano looked up at the back of Ludwig's blonde head. 'Wh-what do you mean? I don't understand?'
'You failed us, Feli.' Came the soft answer. 'Your cowardice and fear allowed for this to happen. Your friends are dead because of you. We lost the battle because of you!'
Amber eyes filled with tears. 'I am sad for them, yes, but I'm glad that you're alive! I know that is selfish of me to think…but I'm just glad you're still alive! I love you, Ludwig! I never want you to ever leave me!'
'But I'm already dead, Feli.' He turned around in Feliciano's arms to show the gaping hole in his ribcage. 'I died protecting you, hoping that you could find your courage to fight, yet all you did was run away and cry. You left me alone. You let me die; your one true love and mate, you let me die!'
Feliciano backed away from him. 'No! No, Ludwig, that's not true! I didn't kill anyone!' He cried. 'Please! Please don't leave me! You're not dead! You're not dead! Please say you're not dead?' But Ludwig's body joined the others on the floor, lifeless and bloody.
All of his happiness melted away, leaving him crying in the dark amongst the bodies of his dead friends and lover. This all happened because he just wasn't strong enough to protect them! They were all depending on him and yet he could not deliver the salvation they were hoping for. 'I knew it.' He cried into his hands. 'I knew it all along! I knew I couldn't do this! Everyone tried to help me but all I did was fail them! I fail at everything! I can't do anything right! I'm such a coward! A worthless, useless coward!' Taking a dagger from Ivan's belt, Feliciano held the blade to his throat. 'It's only just.' His hand shook. The blade wiggled. He tried and tried again to press the blade into his flesh, but once again, he was too much of a coward to do so. Trying again, he placed the blade on his left wrist. 'If I cut up then the blood will leak out faster…a swift death…that I don't even deserve!' But try as he may the dagger simply fell to the floor, clinking loudly.
'DAMN IT!' Feliciano fell to the floor, folding his arms under his head to cradle it as he sobbed pitifully. He tried to wrap himself up in his wings, trying to hide from his shame and his fear yet the guilt mocked him. 'I am no angel…no being of light! I cannot be merciful. I cannot be kind. I cannot be brave…I can't even stand up for myself!' He said through his tears. 'I'm a failure and a coward…just like everyone has always said. I'm not meant for happiness, or greatness. I am nothing.'
Everything faded away leaving him in a circle of light among heavy darkness. Ludwig was the only one on his mind. He had let Ludwig down the most. He hated himself for caring less about his dead friends and mourning Ludwig above them all. Feliciano knew now that he really was a demon, in both mind and body. One would think a demon brave and strong, but he was the greatest exception; the exception that caused the death of his mate and friends. Why was he even chosen for all of this? He had no history background like his friends did! He was no general or warrior or king! He was nothing! Nothing but a whiny little crybaby who was of no use to anyone.
'I give up.' Feliciano said to himself, still hiding his face. 'I don't know if this is a dream or a vision…but I do know this- I give up.' He sobbed again. 'I can't do it! I just can't! I can't fight the Fiends! I can't save everyone! I'll just lay here and die…if I'm strong enough for that.'
'Hey! Stupid brother! Your crying is giving me a headache!'
Feliciano lifted his head to see the breathing form of his twin brother. 'L-Lovi?'
'Lovi-Romano, you stupid ass! Yes, you know me! What the hell are you doing crying over here like some little brat who was just pushed on the playground?'
Feliciano shied away from his brother. 'I'm sorry, Romano, but I just don't have the strength to do any more. I can't fight…I'm nothing but a coward and a crybaby, just like everyone says!' He looked up at his twin again. 'You and I are nothing special, Lovi. We are nothing. You are as big a coward and crybaby as I. We have no secret past like Ludwig and the others do. We have no pride…we have nothing to fight for. We're too scared to fight!'
'Well then, stupid little brother, I guess I have to let you in on a secret; one that I found out after I died.'
'You're dead? Really and truly? You aren't a ghost?'
Lovino crossed his arms. 'I'm dead, Feli. Dead. Long gone. I don't know where the fuck I am, but I know where YOU are! I don't know how I got here but something told me to come and find you! Good thing I did, too! You really do need my help! Stupid little brother! It's just like that time I gave you a dollar to go into the store and buy me a candy bar, instead you come out with a bar of soap! Stupido!'
Feliciano turned from him. 'Just go away, brother. Leave me alone. I'm just going to stay here…alone…in the dark…away from everything. I'm useless and weak…I'm worth nothing. Stupid little baker that I am. Singing songs and skipping down the street…foolish person that I am.' He glanced at his brother again to see Lovino pretending to play a violin.
'You know what this is? It's the world smallest violin playing, 'Just for Feli'!' He groweled when Feliciano turned away from him again. 'Hey, you're starting to piss me off majorly, so let me show you this. Stand up, you loser!' Romano forced Feliciano to his feet. 'There! Look there! We DO have a past, you idiot! We were just worth something MORE than your lame-ass little demon friends!'
Feliciano followed Lovino's finger to a scene in the woods overlooking an ancient city. 'Rome?' He squinted his eyes to get a better look but it faded away. 'Romi, I don't understand?'
Lovino Romano stood behind his brother, kissed his cheek, and pointed again. 'Keep watching.'
Feliciano saw himself and Romano as very young boys, toddlers really, rolling around in the dirt among some reeds. A she-wolf came over to them, giving them both a sniff before letting them suckle her. His eyes widened. Any strong Italian household knows of this myth; how Romulus and Remus were the founders of Rome, born from the gods and suckled by a she-wolf. But this was just a myth, a story, none of it was true. 'Lovi…this is stupid. We are not Romulus and Remus.'
'No, we aren't, but we are the spirits of them.'
'It's a myth. A story. It's not real.'
'Out of all that you have seen are you REALLY saying that? You think it's just a story? It's not! I thought so too, but when I found out the truth I realized that we are of the bloodlines of the ancient Roman gods! Or who were perceived as gods. Perhaps they were something else, brother. Perhaps humans thought them gods but they were really mystical beings like the ones you see now in your life as a demon. No one really knew back then, brother!'
Feliciano turned to face him. 'What's the point of showing me all this? If we're from the bloodline of ancient gods and Rome, then why are we so useless?' He gave a light snort. 'You think our mother was Rhea and our father Mars?'
'Maybe, maybe not. But look again.'
Feliciano turned around to see a tall Roman soldier, almost resembling them, coming towards their toddler forms with the wolf. 'Who is that?'
'I'm not really sure. He never says. Although the name that comes to me when I see him is how mother always spoke of our heritage and home country. It just feels right. Do you remember it at all, dumb brother? Do you remember the name she used?'
Feliciano thought back to the stories mother would tell of their true home in Rome, Italy. He smiled when he finally remembered, and it had been so long, years even, since he last heard of or thought about the name. 'She called him, 'Grandpa Rome'.'
'Just remember, stupid brother, you have the blood of the ancient gods and the power of mighty Rome running through your veins. We may never truly know where we came from, exactly who sired us, who raised us, or even how we were reborn again. But at least we know that we're not just bumbling cowards. We all came from something, Feli! Even your demon horde!'
Feliciano gasped. 'Yes! Yes that's right! Like Ludwig from Germania and Sadiq from the Ottoman Empire!'
'Yup! You and I are decedents of the mighty Empire of Rome! Ancient blood flows through you.' He kissed his cheek again. 'Remember that when you fight against your enemies. You have everything you need, little brother. Grandpa Rome will help you in your time of need.'
'But Lovi…you are forgetting something. Rome was a mighty empire that fell. It ran out of strength.' Feliciano stared at the man they called, 'Grandpa Rome'. 'Maybe…this is why were are cowards. Maybe we were first born as strong warriors of greatness…then we lost…and we were reborn as this; as cowards.'
Lovino shrugged his shoulders. 'You may be right, little brother. But it doesn't matter now. We are decedents of the once mighty Rome. You just have to find that strength again.'
Feliciano suddenly puffed out his chest, feeling strong and empowered after Romano's words. 'I'm a decedent of Rome! I'm a mighty Roman Warrior!' The man they called 'Grandpa Rome' smiled and gave a thumbs up before fading away, and Lovino went with him. 'Wait! Romi! Romano!'
He woke up from his vision, staring up at the shining crystals sparkling above him. Sitting up, he looked around and noticed that everyone was still sleeping. 'That was a terrible vision.' He said to himself, remembering the dead forms of his friends. 'Will I really be able to protect them? Was all that I saw true?' His visions haven't lied before, so he had no other reason than to trust in what he saw. 'The mighty Roman Empire, hm?' He looked at Ludwig. 'Germania, an enemy of Rome.' He glanced to Sadiq. 'Ottoman Empire, another enemy of Rome.' He looked at Ivan, not even knowing where Russia was during that time. Arthur and Francis were from medieval Europe and Alfred from the budding 'empire' of America. They all intertwine together somehow, except for Kiku, of course. 'Remember that I am a decedent of gods, or mystical beings,' he stood up 'A decedent of a powerful ancient empire.' Lovino Romano was right; there was no telling of exactly who they were or where they came from, other than they were spirits of ancient Rome. Mighty warriors. 'Hm…I only hope that Grandpa Rome makes me strong enough to protect all my friends,' he looked at Ludwig. 'And my mate.'
Although he had a newfound hope and strength of spirit there was still something bothering him deep down within his heart. He feared that something terrible was indeed going to happen, but with the slight courage he found now he may be able to ward it off, or at least find a stronger way to deal with it. He would protect his friends and Ludwig from the Fiends.
"I can do it!" Feliciano said proudly. "I am powerful and strong!" He posed like Superman.
"You are loud and annoying right now!" Came a cranky Gilbert's voice. "Go back to sleep!"
Feliciano quickly laid back down beside Ludwig. 'I'll just keep all this to myself…for now.'
End Chapter 27 TBC
***The monster in the water scene scared me, since one of my uncomfortable fears is the ocean, and the massive beasts that live beneath the water. I don't like seeing the shadows of big fish under water. It terrifies me. I don't like to swim either. So that whole monster in the water scene was all mushed together from my own fear. It's all for the sake of creativity.***
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