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Full Circle	By : drunkenmuses Category: +S to Z > s-CRY-ed/Scryed Views: 6023 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own s-CRY-ed, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 1-Slip
- 2-Interrupt
- 3-Denial
- 4-Help
- 5-Presence
- 6-Friend
- 7-Return
- 8-Awake
- 9-Defiance
- 2
- 3
- 4
Title: Full Circle

Author: Drunken Muses (Battlejoy and Brightdreamer)

Genre: Romance/Angst/AU

Rating: NC-17

Summary: Some secrets have a way of coming back to haunt those who keep them. Memories are shared willingly and unwillingly, with drastic consequences. Ryuhou/Kazuma, Kazuma/Shiirice, Ryuhou/Shiirice, and (eventually) Kazuma/Shiirice/Ryuhou.

Disclaimer: We don't own s-CRY-ed. Wish we did. Have no money, don't sue us!

Note from the Muses: Deciding that the fic was getting too sappy, we went back and heavily edited chapter 2. Didn't change too much, just the tone of a lot of the KazuRyu dialogue. Go back and re-read it, if you'd like!

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Chapter 3: Denial

Kazuma gently pushed the heavy green bangs back from Ryuhou's forehead before laying a cool, wet cloth across it. He frowned worriedly as the older boy stirred a bit and moaned. He continued to touch Ryuhou's hair softly until the other calmed back into a restless sleep. Sighing, Kazuma sat back on the blankets, running his fingers along Ryuhou's arm. It had been several days since Ryuhou had first fallen ill, and the young man showed no sign of improving. Kazuma didn't really know what else to do for him. When Kanami had been sick, he'd immediately rushed for a doctor, but somehow he knew that Ryuhou wouldn't appreciate that. He hated seeing his friend like this, though...

His friend... and much more. Kazuma caught himself and smiled ruefully. Who would have guessed it would end up this way? Even after all the fights and attempts on each other's life, the two of them had ended up with some rather confusing nights together. He supposed it was inevitable, really. The strong emotions they felt for one another had to have some outlet... might as well be this rather than killing. But... that explanation still didn't quite sit well with him.

Kazuma looked down to notice he was absently rubbing his thumb along Ryuhou's hand in his inattention. In a way, it really had been Shiirice who brought them together; who precipitated this level of their relationship. After their final all-out battle, Kazuma had continued to travel with Ryuhou, ostensibly still working together to fight the Mainland threat. Funny how the other's reminiscing of Shiirice was the catalyst for all this...

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Ryuhou sighed. Not only did he sigh, he did one of those wretched sighs that you insisted no one was meant to hear, but it was crystal clear, ringing in everyone's ears. Or at least, that's the way it seemed to Kazuma. And this was the third sigh in as many minutes. "What is it, Ryuhou?" Kazuma growled.

"Nothing," Ryuhou said, focusing on the stray dandelion in his hand. In the vastness of the wastelands, the land was slowly healing as only land could, over-choked with weeds and grasses that humans found no use for but were truly the only way to heal.

Kazuma rolled his eyes. "No, it's not nothing. You're... bitching about something to yourself, and it's pissing me off. What the hell's wrong?"

"I told you it was nothing," An edge of irritation worked it's way into Ryuhou's voice. Kazuma knew if he didn't work fast, Ryuhou would clam up so that he'd rather die than tell the problem.

Kazuma punched Ryuhou on the shoulder. "C'mon, you can tell me." He grinned. "Am I gonna have to beat it out of you?"

"It wouldn't mean anything to you." Ryuhou said sourly. Kazuma hit him on the arm playfully again, and the older boy sighed once more. "Okay, fine. Shiirice, my subordinate at HOLY, used to really like dandelions."

Kazuma froze at Shiirice's name. "She did, huh?" he asked in a flat voice.

"Yeah." Another deep sigh filled the air. "I miss her so much. Her mere presence made me warm and feel important. I have this hole in my life at times," Ryuhou said wretchedly. "These wastelands stretch for so long. They didn't seem to when she wa-UHMPH!" Ryuhou wasn't expecting that punch. Rubbing his jaw, he demanded. "What the hell was that for? You were the one that wanted to know!"

Kazuma glared at Ryuhou, not particularly wanting to explain just why he was so angry. "I don't know, you're just annoying me."

"You were the one that said we needed to vent and let go of our emotions from time to time!" Ryuhou wanted an answer.

Kazuma avoided his gaze, seeming to stare off at the sky, blinking back tears. It would have probably helped if he weren't staring directly at the sun. "You just pissed me off. I thought both of us should vent at the same time."

Ryuhou dumped his pack to tackle and punch Kazuma. "Who are you to control what emotions I can vent or not?"

Kazuma rolled them over with a snarl, straddling Ryuhou and pinning his arms on either side of his head. "I don't know, you're just annoying me! That's all!"

Ryuhou tried to leverage his legs over Kazuma to get him off him as his arms strained, quickly overturning the other guy. Wrestling was yet another courses at the HOLY academy at which he had excelled. "I can mourn her any damn way I like! She was special to me and I won't forget her like she was nothing!"

Kazuma struggled. How dare he say that? He let her pine for him every day they were together and now had the audacity to say he had feelings for her? What was so damn special about Ryuhou that he didn't have? Abruptly, he decided to find out. "Damn. You are a jerk. Don't know what she ever saw in you..." he mumbled, then reached up with one hand and pulled Ryuhou's head down for a rough kiss. Startled, Ryuhou released his hold on Kazuma and tried to pull away, which only gave the other the leverage he needed to roll them over again.

Lying on top of Ryuhou, Kazuma pinned the man's arms down as he continued to kiss him, deepening it with Ryuhou's frightened and confused surrender. Why had Shiirice chosen this man over him? What was so exceptional? Kazuma's tongue invaded Ryuhou's mouth, as if trying to pry the mystery from him.

Ryuhou eyelids closed as he began to enjoy the feeling despite his mind's protest. He knew this was wrong, and yet... he couldn't help but react to the insistent lips pressing against his. He had just started to relax more when the warm sensation of Kazuma's lips left his, just as randomly and suddenly as they had met them in the first place. He opened his eyes just in time to see Kazuma's fist ram into his jaw. Furious and confused, he threw Kazuma off him and pushed into a defensive crouch. "What the hell was that?"

Dazed by the extremes in sensory overload, Ryuhou barely caught Kazuma's muttered, "She didn't sacrifice herself to see you unhappy."

Ryuhou straightened a bit. "W-what?" When Kazuma didn't answer, he lowered his head. He knew what the other had said. He'd heard him well enough. "I... I don't think I know how to be happy."

"Well, we're going to have to learn." With that, Kazuma stepped forward and grabbed Ryuhou around the waist, leaning in to kiss him again. After a few intense seconds, he turned away with a smirk, grabbing his pack off the ground as he walked away. He didn't dare to stop and wonder at the faint warmth still on his lips.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Feeling another smile tug at his mouth, Kazuma swiped Ryuhou's face and neck with the wet cloth once again before settling it on his forehead. With a yawn, he curled up beside his friend, resting his hand on the man's chest. Lulled by the rhythmic rise and fall, he soon drifted off to sleep as well.

************************

Several weeks later, Ryuhou's condition had not improved. Hardly a day went by that he didn't pass out or vomit at least once. On bad days, he could barely even keep down the small sips of water that Kazuma was able to coax him to drink. He would drift in and out of a fevered consciousness, unable to move from the tent. A "good" day would involve him keeping one meal on his stomach, and those days were rare.

Despite his companion's assurances that he would be all right, Kazuma was starting to become seriously worried. Each day that Ryuhou showed improvement, Kazuma would be hopeful that the mysterious illness was waning. However, it seemed that every subsequent relapse was steadily worse. Without conscious decision, Kazuma found himself directing their wandering journey toward a nearby town, on days Ryuhou was well enough to travel. Kazuma insisted on driving the jeep during these short trips, hoping that Ryuhou wouldn't pick up on where they were going too soon. There had to be a doctor or hospital in the town, and he hoped that Ryuhou wouldn't protest too much once they arrived. He'd hate to have to knock the other man out to drag him to the clinic!

Ryuhou was no fool. He knew where Kazuma was leading them. He didn't feel like arguing, either; he knew his protests would only make the boy more determined. The only way to dissuade Kazuma would be to get well, and quickly. Ryuhou was a firm believer in mind-over-matter, and stubbornly decided one day to prove to Kazuma�and himself�that he really was fine.

He began by eating a full bowl of stew that evening�and kept it all down. Although Kazuma didn't comment on this, he could tell that the other was pleased. They traveled a bit more before setting up camp for the night. Ryuhou slipped into bed early, but lay awake waiting for Kazuma. When the younger man crawled underneath the blankets, Ryuhou immediately rolled over, wrapped his arms around him, and kissed him passionately. A small gasp of surprise escaped Kazuma's lips, and he pulled back quickly. "Ryuhou... are you...?"

The older boy cut off his question with another kiss. He didn't want to argue with Kazuma, he wanted to... honestly, he wanted to fuck him silly. The other had barely touched him since he'd fallen ill, aside from caring for him. But Ryuhou needed more than care tonight.

"Ryuhou," Kazuma grimaced, hating himself for having to say this. "You're not up for this, and we both know it."

Shifting his body against Kazuma's, Ryuhou grabbed the boy's arms and pinned them on either side of his head. "Care to wager on that?" he growled, rocking against him slightly.

Kazuma steeled himself. Ryuhou would not turn him on. "Being puked on isn't very sexy. Go to sleep, Ryuhou."

"I don't want to sleep." Leaning down, Ryuhou nuzzled Kazuma's neck, right below his ear. "I'm feeling fine..." he murmured. "I want this."

Kazuma chuckled. "Damn, I'm easy if I've breaking down at this." He shut his eyes, letting his body relax against the other man. Times past it would kill him to admit even the slightest weakness in front of the older boy. They had advanced so much if their once-bitter feud had evolved into a friendly competition with "added benefits."

Sighing quietly with relief, Ryuhou released Kazuma's arms to rub gently at his chest. "I'll stop if I feel bad, OK?" He smiled ruefully. "I won't puke on you... again. I promise." He kissed him again, as if savoring the feeling. "You need it too, I know..."

"I'm not admitting to anything," Kazuma muttered with all the gruffness he could muster. It didn't quite seem genuine as he leaned forward and locked lips with Ryuhou.

Closing his eyes, Ryuhou deepened the kiss. Sliding his hand underneath Kazuma's shirt, he grew even more excited at the feeling of taut skin and firm muscle. He shifted his weight again, settling himself between Kazuma's legs as he began to work the shirt upward. Breaking off the kiss, he moved down lower, aggressively chasing the material with his lips and tongue.

Kazuma's eyes widened a bit. "Wow, what got into you tonight?"

Ryuhou smiled up at him. "What, I can't be in control for once?"

"I guess..." Kazuma groaned as Ryuhou skirted the edges of his waistband with his fingertips. "You're still a tease, though."

Ryuhou licked at the skin below the boy's navel. "Mm, you just have to be patient."

Kazuma tugged insistently on Ryuhou's shoulder. "This would work better with your clothes off."

"Always so demanding." Ryuhou sat up and quickly tugged his tank top off. "That better?"

"Almost..." Kazuma reached over and yanked down Ryuhou's shorts.

Ryuhou winced as his erection was roughly freed. "Hey!" In retaliation, he grabbed the waistband of Kazuma's boxers, pulling them swiftly off.

Grinning, Kazuma removed his shirt, then paused. "Y'know, I can be top if you really don't feel up to the whole effort," he said, irritating Ryuhou beyond belief. "We can take it real slow."

With a growl, Ryuhou slid up Kazuma's body, settling himself firmly between the other's legs and pinning his arms again. "Are you trying to make me mad?" He leaned in to kiss him roughly, possessively, then pulled away with a gasp. "I told you, I feel fine." He rocked against the other man, enjoying the quiet sigh he elicited. It wasn't quite completely true... Ryuhou could already feel an annoying weakness creeping over his body. He forced it aside, however, and pushed against Kazuma again. He wanted this. He needed this.

Kazuma smiled and chuckled, "Just checking. It's okay for pals to worry about each other especially if one of them is a panty-waist ex-HOLY officer." Okay, so he was picking a fight a bit, but if anyone really looked at their relationship that was what it mostly contained.

Ryuhou raised one eyebrow. "Oh, so you're going to be like that, huh?" Reaching down, he grasped Kazuma's arousal and gave him a few firm strokes. "I think you should worry more about yourself and what I'm going to do to you..."

Kazuma groaned and gritted his teeth at both the rough treatment and the pleasure it caused. "Is that the best you can do?" he asked, though the effect was ruined by his breathless voice cracking midway.

Ryuhou felt one corner of his mouth quirk up into a smirk reminiscent of the man below him. He was never one to back down from a challenge. "Not at all. I'm just getting started." Releasing Kazuma's other hand, he began to slip down his companion's body, nipping and licking at his chest and stomach. He kept his other hand firmly wrapped around the boy's shaft, alternating between teasing strokes and firm caresses.

For Kazuma's part his previous worries of his companion were starting to disappear and he convinced himself that it was better for each other just to let Ryuhou prove he was okay. He let his hand come to rest on Ryuhou's head, stroking his fingers through the long green hair as he instinctively urged him downward.

Ryuhou was more than happy to oblige, steadily moving down the other's body. He paid extra attention to Kazuma's stomach and the juncture of his hip, releasing his erection to stroke both hands down his thighs. Kazuma gasped and pushed insistently on Ryuhou's shoulders, and the older boy finally lowered his head and licked along the hard length beneath him. Ryuhou heard a low, reverberating moan as he took the other into his mouth, stroking firmly with his tongue. He suckled on the tip for a moment before taking him deeper... then promptly pulled back as he felt his gag reflex try to assert itself. The bile checked itself midway up Ryuhou's throat as his stomach did a somersault. Maybe it wasn't a good idea for him to do what he was planning since Kazuma wasn't one to keep still, and gagging was always a problem even without his illness. Deciding not to tempt fate, he simply licked up and down Kazuma's shaft a few times before pulling away and fumbling in his bag for a familiar bottle. Kazuma looked at him with a concerned, inquisitive expression, but he reassured him with a smile and a shake of his head. "Wouldn't want to wear you out too soon... I've got something better in mind."

"You tease," was Kazuma's only reply.

Ryuhou squirted some of the oil into the palms of his hand, wondering at the chill temperature of liquid. Rubbing his hands together to warm it, and then spreading it over his own member made Ryuhou note the cool feeling of his own hand. He nudged Kazuma's legs further apart, and his lover complied eagerly, bending his knees and opening himself up. Ryuhou easily pushed two fingers inside him, and Kazuma gasped in surprise. "Geez, you fingers are cold," he hissed.

Ryuhou shrugged, moving his hand in a familiar stretching motion. "Deal with it."

Kazuma let his head fall back to the pillow with a moan, already anxious to feel more of Ryuhou inside him. After a moment, he reached down and pushed Ryuhou's hand away. "That's enough... come on..."

"You always were too impatient," Ryuhou said with another smile, already removing his fingers and sliding back up Kazuma's body. Kazuma pulled his knees up to his chest in invitation, hooking his legs over Ryuhou's arms. Closing his eyes, Ryuhou entered him with a low moan, shivering at the feeling. He didn't want to admit how much he'd missed this.

Kazuma paused, relishing the feeling of pain soon overtaken by pleasure as Ryuhou started slowing sliding out to pump in again. "Faster."

"Will you wait a second?" Ryuhou said, irritated. Or at least he tried to sound irritated. He was a little dazed at the spots already clouding his peripheral vison, and he internally cursed this damned illness. He firmly told himself that he'd be fine... this was really all he needed. Following Kazuma's urging, he moved his hips faster. Bracing himself on one arm, he groped his other hand around to stroke Kazuma firmly in time with his thrusts. He could already feel his climax approaching, and he bit his lip, trying to hold back. His stamina had really suffered from this... he hated feeling so weak. He forced himself to push harder, go faster... he would not let this beat him.

As if on cue, Kazuma's eye squinted shut as his head tossed back in pleasure. Ryuhou steeled himself and did his best to try to keep the pained grimace on his own face resembling a possible expression of desire in the waning light. He felt Kazuma's body tighten around him, heard the soft cry in his ear, then released with a gasp, pouring the last of his strength into the other.

Exhausted, Ryuhou slumped on top of Kazuma, trying to hold himself up on his elbows so as not to crush the other man. He took deep gulps of air, telling himself that the trembling he felt was simply from the pleasure coursing through his body. After a moment, he rolled off, resting his face against the cool material of the pillow. Kazuma reached over and touched his shoulder lightly, still panting. "Hey... you all right?"

Ryuhou nodded weakly, feeling sleep dragging at his eyelids. "Mm-hm..." He pulled Kazuma close, holding him tightly as he drifted off. He prayed that this feeling would last.

Kazuma rubbed Ryuhou's shoulder gently, watching the other man sleep. In the moonlight, his friend looked unnaturally pale, and Kazuma couldn't help but feel a twinge of worry. He hoped that Ryuhou had been telling the truth, and that he really was feeling better. With a sigh, he closed his eye as well, letting the warm, satisfied feeling carry him to sleep.

To Be Continued...
- 2
- 3
- 4
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Full Circle