No such thing as Good and Evil

Disclaimer: Don\'t own Gravitation characters

Chapter 2: I am Darkness

“What are you?” Yuki pointed a finger at the woman. “Who are you?”

“A girl, the last time I checked. The first daughter of Tsukikoto.” The woman smiled and sank in to the sofa. She eased her wings open to get more comfortable and so as not to tear the cushions.

“I meant your name,” Yuki spat, lighting a cigarette. He slowly puffed on the stick and held the smoke in for a moment. Then he let it out and waited for an answer.

The woman completely ignored the question and leaned her head back, letting her eyes close. Her hair sat gracefully around her waist and her tail rested neatly on her lap. “What’s the matter, Yuki? Don’t you like me?” she gave a soft smile.

“I would just like to inquire as to why you’re here.” Eiri sat on the couch as far away as possible from her.

“Didn’t Shuichi tell you?” She opened her eyes and sat straight.

“I don’t even know where that idiot is,” Yuki took another drag from his cigarette.

“At work. You know,” she stood and walked to the window that looked out to the city, “I’ve been here almost two months and this the first time we’ve ever spoken.” She smiled sheepishly and turned to face Yuki.

“What?” Yuki almost dropped his cigarette. “Shuichi leaves you here when he goes to work?”

“Don’t act like you didn’t know that someone was always looking over your shoulder. You’ve had the feeling that the apartment was never really empty, even when you were all alone.” She took a step forward and stared.

“So then,” Yuki calmed himself and spoke, “why are you here?”

The woman looked at him for a moment. His face was easier to read than a book that told its own story. So full of questions, she thought. The time isn’t right it seems. So, for the time being you’ll have to keep guessing. “If you have to ask then you’re not ready to know.”

Eiri simply gave her an evil stare that could have slain the strongest of men.

“It’s not nice to stare at me like that,” her voice was low and husky. She began walking towards him cautiously. When he made no attempt to move away she sat on his lap, putting one leg on each side of his waist. “Don’t you find me attractive, Yuki?”

“What does it matter?”

She put her arms around his neck and pulled him in close. “I can see it in your eyes. You want to ravish my body and taste every inch my skin.” She gave a light smirk and wrapped her tail around his leg. “You want to know what I feel like—what it would feel like to be buried deep inside me.”

“You’re deluded. I would never have sex with anyone but Shuichi.”

“Ah, Shuichi. Don’t think that you’re the only man who has ever looked at me that way.” She carefully slipped off Yuki’s lap and stood up.

“What do you mean by that?” Yuki crushed his cigarette in the ashtray.

“Why don’t you ask Shuichi?” she started walking towards the bathroom. “I think I’ll take a shower, if that’s okay with you.”

“Why are you doing this?”

She stopped abruptly. “Because in the end, despite of what I look like, I’m a woman.”

Yuki’s POV
She had been in the bathroom for over two hours, making no noise. I quietly opened the door and stepped in.

She was sitting in a tub full of water with her knees pulled up to her chest and her wings wrapped around her delicate lithe form. Her captivating hair delicately floated in the water, moving of its own will. Her eyes were closed but I couldn’t tell if she was asleep. I don’t know what came over me but the eyes that normally shot daggers were tamed and became soft and kind. Slowly, I stepped towards her wondering if she would react.

“You want something?” she asked calmly. “Or do you just want to see my body that much? If that’s the case then take it all in,” said the woman, standing up. Her eyes opened and her wings no longer hid her naked form.

I looked on in awe. Her body was flawless. I drank every ounce of her in, wishing to never look away or blink. The water droplets so tenderly raced down her body to join the rest of the liquid at her feet.

This is what she wanted, wasn’t it? She wanted me to desire her the way that I do Shuichi. That was her intention from the beginning. That’s what she indicated during our conversation in the living room. So then why? Why does she look so sad? The smile that she used on me was gone and those red eyes appeared as though they would start crying rivers. Maybe she was crying already. Maybe what fell down her body were tears.

I left the bathroom and came back a moment later with a clean towel in hand. She was right where she had been. She looked at me with those sad eyes. They were so familiar, almost as innocent as Shuichi’s when he cries. Then it hit me. That’s why I didn’t kick her out, that’s why I hadn’t gotten angry when she touched me. It was because she reminded me of my lover. In fact she looked like him. They were the same height; probably the same weight, same lithe body, same big eyes, and they both had the same smile. It was a smile that could brighten ten rooms. For the longest time I had thought that Shuichi was the only person who possessed that talent, but she had it too.

I stood before her and started drying that beautiful body that reminded me of the baka. She didn’t react or even seem to care that I was touching her body. All she did was gaze through me into an empty world that dimmed her eyes.

She grabbed my hands just as I was drying her hair. She looked at me and for the first time her eyes weren’t gone as she looked into my soul. “Thank you.” Her frowned lips spoke softly.

A tear rolled down my face without me even knowing about it. That expression held so much pain and sorrow. I dropped the towel, letting it fall to the water, and pulled her into my embrace.

Her body held no warmth. It was like hugging ice, but her skin was soft. Its texture was like silk and her hair was even softer. Even her wings that appeared rough were smooth and cold. I could feel her chest rise and fall when she took breaths. There was no heartbeat though. No pulse and her breath was chilled.

She slowly wrapped her arms around my chest and let her wings follow. Kindly she nuzzled my chest and buried her face into my shirt. She had started sniffling. I lifted her head to wipe way the tears, but that’s not what I saw. It was blood that ran down her face.

“Tears of blood?” my voice had come out louder than I intended it to.

She pushed me away, finally stepping out of the tub, and walked to the door. With her back turned to me she spoke, “Crying is the same as bleeding, Yuki. Which one you do is determined by how big the wound is and how little it hurts.”

Two hours later…
“I’m sorry,” my voice was gentle and low.

“For what?” she asked me while tracing my cheekbone with one lazy finger.

“You saved me and Shuichi from being killed and I never thanked you.”

“You’re just feeling guilty because you had sex with me.” She turned on her side, completely naked, and gazed into my eyes. Her wings lay behind her folded down and her tail was slung over her hip. The only thing that covered her beautiful body was a sheet.

“Isn’t that what you wanted?” I brushed some locks of black hair from in front of her eyes.

“Something like that.”

I could hear in her voice that it wasn’t pleasure that she was after but love. “Well, I didn’t have sex, I made love.” Her eyes immediately brightened and her smile grew large.

She lay there just smiling at me until her lips once again dropped to a stern expression. She climbed out of bed, still naked, and walked to the wall where the carving was. “I never answered your question.” Her long hair moved with her body as she slid down the wall and sat, pulling her knees up to her chest.

I sat up and focused my eyes. The kind expression was now gone as I waited for her to speak.

“I need your help. For centuries I have been roaming the human world, searching for someone who might assist me. Most people end up behaving like that monk did. In fact, you and Shuichi are the first humans I have ever spoken to. That goes without saying though.”

Centuries? She had been alive for centuries? “Why Shuichi? There are millions of weirdoes out there who would kill to meet you, so why Shuichi?”

“Because he is your lover.”

“What?”

“Your ancestors caused this, so you must know something.”

“My ancestors? What are you talking about?” My voice had become angry.

“You were frightened when you saw Tsukatsu’s name, weren’t you? You were scared because it is a name that very few humans know because of what she was. Most people don’t realize what goes on beyond their own lives. Only those who are willing to accept spiritual peace and an open mind can truly understand the inhuman things of the world.”

“Why are you telling me this?” I was yelling now.

“Because it was the priests and priestesses of the Uesugi Clan that killed Tsukatsu! Most humans ignore demons but those that have taught themselves to sense them take it upon themselves to eliminate a creature that they do not understand. It is the nature of your species to destroy anything that they can’t explain. And so they murdered Tsukatsu for refusing to allow demon hunters to kill innocent victims.”

I listened in amazement. When I lived at the temple, my father had told me that Tsukatsu had been a demon that terrorized people and was executed for killing Ieyasu Tokugawa, the ruler of Japan at that time. But this woman wasn’t lying—I could see it in her eyes. Then what was true? I was brought up to hate Tsukatsu but… “What does it matter to you?”

She stared at me for a moment, almost insulted that I had asked that question. Slowly her gaze softened though. “Because she is my sister.”

“What?\" That’s impossible! Tsukatsu’s sister was a hideous, monstrous, murdering demon that died with her. Dead? The dead have no body heat and neither does she…

“I am Renami, Demon Goddess of Darkness.” She rose and walked towards me. The shadows in the room followed close behind her as she stepped to the edge of the bed. By the time we were face to face, her eyes were glowing red and were the only light in the room that was now swallowed in shadows. “I am Darkness.”