Bloody Betrayal
folder
Gravitation › General
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
6
Views:
5,233
Reviews:
7
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
Gravitation › General
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
6
Views:
5,233
Reviews:
7
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
I do not own Gravitation, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
Chapter Three
Hello guys, I'm really sorry I haven't updated in a long time. I could give you loads of excuses, but none of them would be good enough. It's just a combination of life and commitments. Anyway, Chapter 3 is finally here.
Oh and thanks to Aleta, she e-mailed me, and finally get me to crank out this chapter. Thank you. Hope you like.
And thanks to those who reviewed, you guys rock.
Warning: Mention of suicide.
Disclamer: Gravitation and the song does not belong to me.
--
Chapter Three
It had been over a week since Yuki had seen Shuichi; he had been having regular appointments with his psychologist every day. He dreaded walking into that room, and lying on that couch. He was afraid that his psychologist would condemn him his for his behaviour and scold him like he was a child, but it never came.
She would just listen to what he had to say, talking quietly about how he felt when he did these things, but he couldn’t tell her, because he never remembered what he did. So that was why she suggested hypnotism. He was dubious at first, not sure if he wanted to be laid bare. She would have access to his inner most thoughts, but he too wanted to see if it worked. So he could remember what he had put Shuichi through.
He would be lying if he said he wasn’t scared, he was, he was terrified. What if he found he couldn’t handle the memories, but then he berated himself. If he had done it to Shuichi, then he should at least know as well.
That’s how he found himself laying once again on the couch in his psychologists office on Monday morning, the second week of his counselling. He closed his eyes and let her voice guide him into a relaxed state.
He followed her instructions, and even though he was aware of what was happening, he could answer her questions with ease, remembering what he had done. It was hard for him to see what he had done.
“Oh Kami-sama…I stabbed him, then I left him at the hospital. I left him all alone. He still didn’t say anything, and I never noticed the wound…how could I have done that to him?”
The memories flashing before his eyes were horrible, it was like watching a horrible movie, but the bad thing about this was you couldn’t press pause and stop the tape.
“I did everything, I beat and raped him numerous times, and I even accused him of cheating on me with his best friend, I was angry and drunk and I beat him until he passed out…when I got home in the morning, he lied to me, saying he had walked into the door. Why didn’t he tell me what I was doing to him, why did he lie?”
Yuki’s psychologist saw Yuki becoming agitated, so she brought him around. She didn’t know what he was going to do, whether he would run out of the office, but he didn’t, he just sat up and put his head in his hands.
Yuki took deep breaths; he could still see the blood that covered his hands, Shuichi’s blood. What he didn’t understand was why Shuichi lied to him, why didn’t the younger man tell him the truth? Shuichi must have been terrified of him.
He finally raised his head to look at the woman. She looked at him, with concern in her eyes. There was not much she could do for him, she could talk and listen to him, but this was something he had to sort through himself. He had to gain his lovers trust and forgiveness, then he had to forgive himself, something that will probably take a long time.
--
Ever since Yuki had undergone hypnotism, he had been having nightmares. Always about blood, and sometimes he dreamt that he was Yuki Kitazawa, betraying Shuichi, and watching as faceless men raped his baka. He would wake up screaming, drenched in sweat.
He continued with his counselling, and he was taking a break from his writing. He had so much time to spare, so he went for long walks. He also visited his father’s temple to meditate. He was trying anything that would help him relax, he ordered relaxation tapes from the internet, he would lay on the couch, listening to them.
He didn’t think they would work, but he would always find himself relax when listening to them. That was where he was now, he was laying on the couch, listening to the sound of a waterfall. He didn’t bother to move when he heard the front door open; he knew who it would be.
Tohma had been his source of comfort; the man had let him cry on his shoulder. Even though it gave him a headache, the emotions he had bottled up for so long seem to ease up a little. He opened his eyes when he felt the couch dip.
He sat up and looked at Tohma, the blonde smiled.
“I’ve booked you a room at the Windsor Toya Resort and Spa in Hokkaido. Your flight leaves tomorrow at noon. So make sure you relax, and you’re still taking a break from your writing, so take advantage of the hotel facilities.”
Yuki smiled slightly. “Thanks.” He found it hard to look at his friend. He had told the man everything he had done to Shuichi, Tohma didn’t shout or call him names, he just listened. But Yuki still found it difficult to make eye contact with him.
“Have you heard anything from Shuichi?” He asked softly.
“Ryuichi called me this morning…Shuichi’s not acting like himself. Ryuichi said he wasn’t sparkly anymore, but he assured me Shuichi would be fine by the time he came home.”
Yuki just nodded his head; he could understand Shuichi not being himself. He just hoped the younger man would be all right, even though he couldn’t blame him if he wasn’t.
“I better go; I have to get to work. I’ll pick you up tomorrow and drive you to the airport.”
“Thanks.” Yuki said, as Tohma left.
Yuki lay back on the couch and closed his eyes, still listening to the CD.
--
The next afternoon Yuki was checking in at the Windsor Toya Resort and Spa, in Hokkaido. It was a beautiful location. The hotel was situated on a hilltop between Lake Toya and the Pacific Ocean. The views were amazing.
Yuki couldn’t really describe it; you had to see it to understand how beautiful it was. When he was up in his room, he looked out of the window. He was on the top floor so he could see everything. From the window he could see the water and the mountain terrain.
He sighed, it was truly peaceful, and his room was stunning. He was a little tired so he lay on the bed to take a nap. He would then go for a swim and have dinner.
As he closed his eyes, Shuichi’s face flashed before his mind. He hoped he would be able to get his brat back. He remembered why he was doing all this, and as he drifted off to sleep, he prayed to Kami-sama that it would work out.
--
Back in Tokyo, Tohma was pacing his office, something he had never done before. He had just got off the phone to Ryuichi; Shuichi had tried to kill himself. Ryuichi and Hiro had found him in the bathroom and he had slit his wrists.
Shuichi was now in the hospital and he had to be sedated because he kept screaming, thrashing about and trying to sneak out of the hospital. He also kept crying for Eiri. Tohma was at a loss for what to do.
He knew sending Eiri would be a mistake, but what if Shuichi really wanted him. It was all too confusing, Shuichi must have suffered more than he realised. It had only been a day since Eiri left for his vacation, so he thought it would be best to leave him where he was and only call him as a last resort.
Ryuichi had said he would keep him informed. Maybe letting Shuichi go to America had been a mistake. Maybe if he had been here, there would be more people to keep an eye on him. He then wondered if sending K and Fujisaki over would help.
With that in mind, he called the two men and requested for them to meet him in his office. He sighed, and ran a hand through his hair.
--
In Hokkaido Yuki was just finishing breakfast. He had had a relaxing evening and he planned on taking a walk. Tohma had been right; taking a vacation was just what he needed. He left the breakfast room and went back to his room; he put on a t-shirt and grabbed a book and a bottle of water.
He then left the hotel and began walking, the breeze blowing through his hair and the smell of the ocean was soothing. He walked and stopped about an hour away from the hotel. He parked himself under a tree in the shade and opened his book.
--
Yuki woke up still under the tree. He looked at his watch, surprised that he had been asleep for three hours. After taking a drink of water, he got up and slowly made his way back to the hotel. When he arrived, he had a light lunch, had a massage and after that he went to have a soak in the hot springs.
He had never felt more relaxed than he did now. It was peaceful because he had the place to himself. He had his portable CD player by his side and he switched the radio on. He didn’t know if it was mocking him, but Bad Luck ‘In the Moonlight’ came on.
He leant his head back and listened as Shuichi’s voice floated around him. He could see it clearly, Shuichi on the stage at the Tokyo Bay Festival.
“Orenji iro tsuki yoru ga kuruto kimi no koto o omoi dasu
Kakko tsuketa ore no serifu wa hoka no dare kano serifu de
Fui ni miageru Shiruetto kimi no yokogao o terashita
Awai hikari wa ima demo”
He had been in the audience as Shuichi sang the song; his lover had come up with the lyrics on the spot. Yuki’s eyes filled with tears as he realised they weren’t lovers anymore.
“Nani o matteru kimi wa inai heya
Tokei dake ga ashi oto no youni nemurenai mune ni hibiku
Ima mo matteru hitori tomatteru
Futari mita anohi no tsuki o ima dokode kimi wa miteru
Ore no shigusa manete waratta kimi no koe mo omoi dasu
Kimi to aruku yoru no shiin wa orenji iro photogurafu”
Yuki didn’t fight it, he let himself cry. He had learnt that he can’t bottle up his feelings anymore; it was one of the things he was learning. If he let himself cry, he would feel better, even if it did give him a headache.
“Kage ni otoshita uso to ore no wagamama o yurushita
Kimi no namida ga ima demo
Nani mo iwazuni toki wa nagareru
Yagate kuru asa no hisashi ni tokeru youni sora ni kieru
Saigo no yoru wa doko ni mo nakute
Okizari no ore no kokoro o tsuki dake ga ima mo miteru”
He got out of the water and wrapped a towel around his waist. He picked up the radio and listened to the last few lines as he went to get dressed.
“Kimi o matteru tooi omoi demo
Tokei dake ga ashi oto no youni nemurenai mune ni hibiku
Ima mo matteru hitori tomatteru
Futari mita anohi no tsuki o ima dokode kimi wa miteru”
After he was dressed, he went up to his room. He needed to shut himself in his room for a while.
--
Well there you go, I know it was crap, but I have been having trouble with this chapter. I promise to try and not keep you waiting for so long next time. Please review and let me know what you thought.
Oh and thanks to Aleta, she e-mailed me, and finally get me to crank out this chapter. Thank you. Hope you like.
And thanks to those who reviewed, you guys rock.
Warning: Mention of suicide.
Disclamer: Gravitation and the song does not belong to me.
--
Chapter Three
It had been over a week since Yuki had seen Shuichi; he had been having regular appointments with his psychologist every day. He dreaded walking into that room, and lying on that couch. He was afraid that his psychologist would condemn him his for his behaviour and scold him like he was a child, but it never came.
She would just listen to what he had to say, talking quietly about how he felt when he did these things, but he couldn’t tell her, because he never remembered what he did. So that was why she suggested hypnotism. He was dubious at first, not sure if he wanted to be laid bare. She would have access to his inner most thoughts, but he too wanted to see if it worked. So he could remember what he had put Shuichi through.
He would be lying if he said he wasn’t scared, he was, he was terrified. What if he found he couldn’t handle the memories, but then he berated himself. If he had done it to Shuichi, then he should at least know as well.
That’s how he found himself laying once again on the couch in his psychologists office on Monday morning, the second week of his counselling. He closed his eyes and let her voice guide him into a relaxed state.
He followed her instructions, and even though he was aware of what was happening, he could answer her questions with ease, remembering what he had done. It was hard for him to see what he had done.
“Oh Kami-sama…I stabbed him, then I left him at the hospital. I left him all alone. He still didn’t say anything, and I never noticed the wound…how could I have done that to him?”
The memories flashing before his eyes were horrible, it was like watching a horrible movie, but the bad thing about this was you couldn’t press pause and stop the tape.
“I did everything, I beat and raped him numerous times, and I even accused him of cheating on me with his best friend, I was angry and drunk and I beat him until he passed out…when I got home in the morning, he lied to me, saying he had walked into the door. Why didn’t he tell me what I was doing to him, why did he lie?”
Yuki’s psychologist saw Yuki becoming agitated, so she brought him around. She didn’t know what he was going to do, whether he would run out of the office, but he didn’t, he just sat up and put his head in his hands.
Yuki took deep breaths; he could still see the blood that covered his hands, Shuichi’s blood. What he didn’t understand was why Shuichi lied to him, why didn’t the younger man tell him the truth? Shuichi must have been terrified of him.
He finally raised his head to look at the woman. She looked at him, with concern in her eyes. There was not much she could do for him, she could talk and listen to him, but this was something he had to sort through himself. He had to gain his lovers trust and forgiveness, then he had to forgive himself, something that will probably take a long time.
--
Ever since Yuki had undergone hypnotism, he had been having nightmares. Always about blood, and sometimes he dreamt that he was Yuki Kitazawa, betraying Shuichi, and watching as faceless men raped his baka. He would wake up screaming, drenched in sweat.
He continued with his counselling, and he was taking a break from his writing. He had so much time to spare, so he went for long walks. He also visited his father’s temple to meditate. He was trying anything that would help him relax, he ordered relaxation tapes from the internet, he would lay on the couch, listening to them.
He didn’t think they would work, but he would always find himself relax when listening to them. That was where he was now, he was laying on the couch, listening to the sound of a waterfall. He didn’t bother to move when he heard the front door open; he knew who it would be.
Tohma had been his source of comfort; the man had let him cry on his shoulder. Even though it gave him a headache, the emotions he had bottled up for so long seem to ease up a little. He opened his eyes when he felt the couch dip.
He sat up and looked at Tohma, the blonde smiled.
“I’ve booked you a room at the Windsor Toya Resort and Spa in Hokkaido. Your flight leaves tomorrow at noon. So make sure you relax, and you’re still taking a break from your writing, so take advantage of the hotel facilities.”
Yuki smiled slightly. “Thanks.” He found it hard to look at his friend. He had told the man everything he had done to Shuichi, Tohma didn’t shout or call him names, he just listened. But Yuki still found it difficult to make eye contact with him.
“Have you heard anything from Shuichi?” He asked softly.
“Ryuichi called me this morning…Shuichi’s not acting like himself. Ryuichi said he wasn’t sparkly anymore, but he assured me Shuichi would be fine by the time he came home.”
Yuki just nodded his head; he could understand Shuichi not being himself. He just hoped the younger man would be all right, even though he couldn’t blame him if he wasn’t.
“I better go; I have to get to work. I’ll pick you up tomorrow and drive you to the airport.”
“Thanks.” Yuki said, as Tohma left.
Yuki lay back on the couch and closed his eyes, still listening to the CD.
--
The next afternoon Yuki was checking in at the Windsor Toya Resort and Spa, in Hokkaido. It was a beautiful location. The hotel was situated on a hilltop between Lake Toya and the Pacific Ocean. The views were amazing.
Yuki couldn’t really describe it; you had to see it to understand how beautiful it was. When he was up in his room, he looked out of the window. He was on the top floor so he could see everything. From the window he could see the water and the mountain terrain.
He sighed, it was truly peaceful, and his room was stunning. He was a little tired so he lay on the bed to take a nap. He would then go for a swim and have dinner.
As he closed his eyes, Shuichi’s face flashed before his mind. He hoped he would be able to get his brat back. He remembered why he was doing all this, and as he drifted off to sleep, he prayed to Kami-sama that it would work out.
--
Back in Tokyo, Tohma was pacing his office, something he had never done before. He had just got off the phone to Ryuichi; Shuichi had tried to kill himself. Ryuichi and Hiro had found him in the bathroom and he had slit his wrists.
Shuichi was now in the hospital and he had to be sedated because he kept screaming, thrashing about and trying to sneak out of the hospital. He also kept crying for Eiri. Tohma was at a loss for what to do.
He knew sending Eiri would be a mistake, but what if Shuichi really wanted him. It was all too confusing, Shuichi must have suffered more than he realised. It had only been a day since Eiri left for his vacation, so he thought it would be best to leave him where he was and only call him as a last resort.
Ryuichi had said he would keep him informed. Maybe letting Shuichi go to America had been a mistake. Maybe if he had been here, there would be more people to keep an eye on him. He then wondered if sending K and Fujisaki over would help.
With that in mind, he called the two men and requested for them to meet him in his office. He sighed, and ran a hand through his hair.
--
In Hokkaido Yuki was just finishing breakfast. He had had a relaxing evening and he planned on taking a walk. Tohma had been right; taking a vacation was just what he needed. He left the breakfast room and went back to his room; he put on a t-shirt and grabbed a book and a bottle of water.
He then left the hotel and began walking, the breeze blowing through his hair and the smell of the ocean was soothing. He walked and stopped about an hour away from the hotel. He parked himself under a tree in the shade and opened his book.
--
Yuki woke up still under the tree. He looked at his watch, surprised that he had been asleep for three hours. After taking a drink of water, he got up and slowly made his way back to the hotel. When he arrived, he had a light lunch, had a massage and after that he went to have a soak in the hot springs.
He had never felt more relaxed than he did now. It was peaceful because he had the place to himself. He had his portable CD player by his side and he switched the radio on. He didn’t know if it was mocking him, but Bad Luck ‘In the Moonlight’ came on.
He leant his head back and listened as Shuichi’s voice floated around him. He could see it clearly, Shuichi on the stage at the Tokyo Bay Festival.
“Orenji iro tsuki yoru ga kuruto kimi no koto o omoi dasu
Kakko tsuketa ore no serifu wa hoka no dare kano serifu de
Fui ni miageru Shiruetto kimi no yokogao o terashita
Awai hikari wa ima demo”
He had been in the audience as Shuichi sang the song; his lover had come up with the lyrics on the spot. Yuki’s eyes filled with tears as he realised they weren’t lovers anymore.
“Nani o matteru kimi wa inai heya
Tokei dake ga ashi oto no youni nemurenai mune ni hibiku
Ima mo matteru hitori tomatteru
Futari mita anohi no tsuki o ima dokode kimi wa miteru
Ore no shigusa manete waratta kimi no koe mo omoi dasu
Kimi to aruku yoru no shiin wa orenji iro photogurafu”
Yuki didn’t fight it, he let himself cry. He had learnt that he can’t bottle up his feelings anymore; it was one of the things he was learning. If he let himself cry, he would feel better, even if it did give him a headache.
“Kage ni otoshita uso to ore no wagamama o yurushita
Kimi no namida ga ima demo
Nani mo iwazuni toki wa nagareru
Yagate kuru asa no hisashi ni tokeru youni sora ni kieru
Saigo no yoru wa doko ni mo nakute
Okizari no ore no kokoro o tsuki dake ga ima mo miteru”
He got out of the water and wrapped a towel around his waist. He picked up the radio and listened to the last few lines as he went to get dressed.
“Kimi o matteru tooi omoi demo
Tokei dake ga ashi oto no youni nemurenai mune ni hibiku
Ima mo matteru hitori tomatteru
Futari mita anohi no tsuki o ima dokode kimi wa miteru”
After he was dressed, he went up to his room. He needed to shut himself in his room for a while.
--
Well there you go, I know it was crap, but I have been having trouble with this chapter. I promise to try and not keep you waiting for so long next time. Please review and let me know what you thought.