Love, For Drunken Mass Murderers

Love, For Drunken Mass Murderers
Rating: M

Category: Humor/Romance

Pairing: LxLight

Warning(s): Yaoi (male/male sexual situations), Lime in the second chapter and Lemon in the third.

Yaoi. “You have a ‘thoroughly drunk’ boy chained to you, to whom you are attracted, and a bed that you can easily access?” Light inquired. L nodded. “Then why the hell haven’t you fucked me yet?”


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Step Three; Even if you can still resist under the influence of all the will power (or alcohol or hypnosis), you simply must let them fuck you. You will gain their trust if they see you fully vulnerable, and soon their love. You, being the intelligent mass murderer you are, can handle it. Trust me, follow these three easy steps and you’ll get your hot (albeit slightly freaky) detective right wear you want him! Especially if you’re –oh, I don’t know –chained together?
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L was the one who was perplexed now. He knew he’d heard Light correctly, because he knew he wasn’t drunk enough for the alcohol to affect his mind so much to distort something innocent to something like that. He’d never had hallucinations before. He knew his mind, and his mind would not put those words into his head. That meant, through process of elimination, that Light had really said those words.
Light continued looking at him, his eyes wide and naive looking as he waited for Ryuzaki’s response. Hm, had he perhaps, been too bold? Would that scare the detective away? He rested his cheek in the palm of his hand and place his elbow on the table and ignored the bartender who had frozen where he stood to listen to Ryuzaki’s answer.

After a long, dreadful silence, L opened his mouth, and Light nearly sighed with relief, thinking he would finally answer. Instead, his thumb ended up in that mouth and Light glowered at the man.

Finally, removing that appendage from his lips, Ryuzaki spoke.

“I suppose that was a misjudgment on my part, Yagami-kun,” L answered the question finally and then stood up, “Shall we go then?”

Light blinked and then smiled brilliantly, in a way that reminded L of when he’d accepted to spend every moment of his time with him until he caught Kira. If he considered that, then what was the chance that Light was Kira? Not very high, unless you thought about the fact Light was smart, and might agree to such a thing just to get the suspicion off of him. Why was he thinking about that when he was about to fuck said suspect senseless?

Ah. Right. He was a paranoid, overanalyzing freak.

He’d nearly forgotten –it must’ve been the alcohol.

Removing himself from his seat, Light started walking from the bar, a bit too confidently, since he had no idea where they were going. If he had been sober, he might’ve been able to think about all the hotels in this part of town, quickly assessing which ones Ryuzaki wouldn’t set foot in until he narrowed it down to one or two possible ones. As it where –he was adequately drunk and could assess whether the sign said ‘walk’ or ‘stop’, let alone figure out which hotel they were heading to.

Once out on the street, Ryuzaki shoved his hands in his pockets before quickly walking to the left, tugging Light in that direction after him. They walked and on the way, Light decided this would be a perfect time to ask a few more questions.

“Hey, Ryuzaki.”

“Yes, Yagami-Kun?”

“How does you hair stick up like that?”

“It’s natural, Yagami-kun.”

“Oh. It doesn’t seem natural.”

“…”

“Hey, Ryuzaki.”

“Yes, Yagami-kun?”

“Do you wear eyeliner?”

“No, Yagami-kun.”

“Oh. It looks like it.”

“…”

“Hey, Ryuzaki.”

“…Yes, Yagami-kun?”

“Since you’re about to pound me into a mattress, don’t you think it would be better to call me by my first name?” Light inquired, looking at the man interestedly. L’s eye’s flickered to Light momentarily before setting them back to straight ahead.

“If you want, Light-kun,” L responded.

“Hey, Ryuzaki.”

“We have arrived, Light-kun,” L said before Light could ask him and more questions.

He sure talked a lot when he was drunk, he’d noticed. He just hoped he’d be just as oral in bed, and he didn’t doubt it. The chances were 90 percent, considering how he was in the bathroom back at the bar. Light seemed to be incredibly…responsive, to say the very least. Hm. This would be…fun.

Upon walking into the Hotel, the few voices around went startlingly silent. Light couldn’t contain a giggle as he stumbled in after Ryuzaki, due to the flabbergasted looks on the occupants’ faces. L looked at them as well, though it was quite a normal response. Two men, handcuffed together, one obviously drunk, checking into a hotel room in the middle of the night? Their surprised looks were understandable.

He walked over to the desk in his usual graceful way, or rather, what his clouded mind thought was graceful. It was more of a clumsy prance then anything else, and when he reached the counter he relayed the name that he vaguely remembered using for the account in this particular hotel. The man nodded slowly, staring at Ryuzaki and then at Light, who was tapping his fingers jadedly on the marble surface.

He handed Ryuzaki the hotel key, a credit card type thing, and they when to the elevator, L jerking a rather distracted Light after it. It seemed that this hotel was particularly fond of shiny vases, mirrors and other ornaments that Light’s strangely suffocated mind thought were pretty. Finally, they made it inside the elevator, and Light jumped forward to push the button.

L observed, rather amusedly, that Light –even while highly intoxicated –was still a control freak. It was a sorry attempt from the smashed teen. When the elevator started moving upwards, to the twelfth floor, Light toppled over inelegantly and landed on his bottom with a thud. L looked down at him, a flash of something akin to mirth showing in his large black orbs.

“This fucking box stole my stomach!” Light hit the side of the elevator with his fist, but only ended up hurting himself. He barely noticed it, but his knuckles would throb in the morning, once his brain could evaluate the pain resonating from his abused hand.

L watched as Light attempted to regain his footing, only to be knocked down again when the elevator came to a stop. Pouting, Light finally stood, although he was more like pulled to his feet harshly with Ryuzaki started walking out into the hall with him still on the ground. Fucking perverted bastard…being mean to him when he was drunk…

They made it to the room and Ryuzaki closed the door behind them and led them to a room with a bed in it, a queen-sized bed with a flowered comforter. Light was suddenly reminded that he would be having gay sex, with L, on a bed with a flowered blanket. How fucking wrong was that?

“So…Ryuzaki,” Light started, turning toward the detective, “Do you have some kind of lotion or lubrication or something?”

L blinked, giving an expression that said to Light ‘Oh yes, Yagami-kun. What kind of guy do you take me for? I always carry lube around just in case I ever feel the need to fuck my lead suspect up the ass’. Or maybe it was just that blank stare again. You could never really tell with L.

“Heh…stupid question,” Light laughed nervously, and when Ryuzaki continued to glare at him, he added, “Geez, it was a stupid question! Don’t send an ‘evil glare of doom’ at me for every stupid question I ask!”

“If I sent a… ‘evil glare of doom’ toward you for every stupid question you’ve asked me, tonight alone, Light-kun, you would be doomed several times over,” L responded, putting a hand on Light’s chest and pushing him onto the bed. “Now please, Light-kun, cease the vocals.”

Light opened his mouth to retort just as scathingly, but he soon found his mouth occupied with something much more enjoyable then words. Namely, Ryuzaki’s tongue. Light’s groan was swallowed by L’s mouth and he battle’s Light’s tongue for –for something. It wasn’t control nor dominance (Light seemed to surrender that within his second or third shot of tequila). Whatever it was, L certainly didn’t mind. He started nimbly unfasten Light’s pants for the second time that night and this time Light didn’t protest.

He nudged Light on his waist, indicating for him to lift his hips. Light did so surprisingly obediently, too drunk on alcohol and kisses to do much otherwise. L left Light’s shoes on, letting the pants pool around Light’s ankles, trapped a foot apart by the trousers themselves. Knowing he couldn’t remove their shirts because of the chain, so he settled on sliding his hands up Light’s stomach and under the fabric.

His thumbs brushed over Light’s nipples and the boy shuddered, opening his mouth wider so that L could explore his mouth more meticulously. L’s thumbs and forefingers grabs Light’s nubs, cause him to gasp loudly and bend his back to push himself closer to Ryuzaki. The hands halted in their ministrations, and moved down to Light’s hips, where they settled as he removed his lips from the younger mans mouth.

He dropped to his knees and took Light’s weeping manhood into his hands, making Light bite his lip in his effort to contain himself. L looked up at him.

“When I said to cease your vocals, I meant the talking, not the screaming,” L told him, the corner of his mouth twitching as he purposely breathed on Light’s penis, “I want to hear that.”

“I don’t screa –Aaaahhh!” Light’s fingers dug into the flowery blankets as a hot, smoldering wetness enclosed over the tip. “Oh fuck, Ryuzaki –ohfuckohfuckohfuck.”

Stimulated by the response that just that tiny action produced, he inserted more then half of the length into his mouth, his eyes directed upward at the trembling figure.

“Nng…!” Once again, Light was holding back all the sound he could manage. L decided it was a good thing to have his hands on Light’s hips, since the boy was desperately attempting to buck further into his mouth. “Gods…!”

L suckled gently at first, awaiting a reaction that was almost instantaneous. Light cried out, his knuckled flushing white as paper as he gripped on them much too tightly. L left one hand on Light’s hip, to keep him down and put the other hand to Light’s lips and forced three of them into the 17-year-old’s mouth. Light didn’t know what the hell L was up to, but licked the digits in his mouth at the same speed and rhythm Ryuzaki was moving his along his shaft.

Even with L’s long, spidery fingers in his mouth, Raito was emitting noises that he couldn’t hold back. Damn fucking alcohol was messing with ability to hide his emotions… “Nnggh…!”

L took the fingers from Light’s mouth after a second the took his hand off his hip momentarily to push Light onto his back. With a poise unbefitting such an intoxicated person, L kept his mouth around Light’s manhood as they changed position so that once he stuck his fingers in between Light’s thighs, he could reach the boy’s sphincter.

Pressing one finger into Light’s hole, L redirected his other hand to keep Light’s hips pinned to the bed, lest he choke. Light’s grip on the sheets only tightened from then on, and he could no longer hold back his moans. A loud, sharp suddenly yanked itself from Light’s lips as he felt a finger enter him. He squirmed as much as he could, but Ryuzaki’s knee was on his pants, which had trapped Light’s feet rather nicely to the ground and when he wiggled, the detective’s teeth brushed member.

“Oh gods,” Light breathed, momentarily forgetting the finger that was continuing to sink deeper into him. After the initial jolt of pleasure was over though, he felt startlingly aware of the digit, “H-hey…. Ryu-Ryzak…. it feels weird…”

Weird? Funny how alcohol could decrease one’s vocabulary, L thought.

In response to Light’s complaint, L sucked harder, causing Light’s vision to blur and his mind to haze. He cried out loudly. While he was in said daze, Ryuzaki slipped in his other finger. All the way. Light made some sort of noise as he gritted his teeth, the suddenly throbbing sensation snapping him out of the blissful fog. He threw himself up, propping himself halfway up on his elbows to look at Ryuzaki.

“Get –get them out!…nng…It hurts!” Light ordered him, but Ryuzaki did no such thing. Instead he moved the fingers from side to side, pulling a stretching at Light’s inner walls to prepare him. “H-hey…. listen to m-ah!”

Found the prostate, then, L thought, pulling out the fingers half way before driving them back in, aiming for that same spot.

“Ah!” Light collapsed onto his back, his neck bending almost look at the headboard of the bed.

He knew what that was, from his Human Anatomy class, but for some reason the name had slipped his mind. Not that it really mattered, Light told himself as he jerked and gasped as Ryuzaki hit the collection of nerves repeatedly. He clenched his jaw in pain when a third finger was added, the ache shooting up his spine at first, until he grew used to it.

After several minutes of stretching, Light relaxed, controlling his breathing as the finger were pulled out and then shoved back in, hitting that spot hard. L suddenly hummed, causing vibrations of pleasure to spread through Light’s body from both his cock and the bundle of nerves, making his knuckles throb with the pressure of how tight he was clasping the sheets.

“Damn it, Ryu…zaki…” Light panted, arching into the older mans mouth as he felt himself come close.

Those fingers hitting his prostate –Ha! He remembered the name! –really didn’t help him keep control. He decided he despised L’s left hand, since it was the one hold him down by the waist. He made a sound, that he refused to admit was a mewl, as the digits inside him were taken away.

But soon they pinched his sac adroitly, massaging and squeezing –that was the last straw, “St –I’m going to co…Ryu – haaaaahn!”

L’s large eyes watched the reaction as he pulled his mouth away and let the semen shoot onto the hand that was previously cupping Light’s balls. He spread a bit on Light’s opening, just to assure a smooth entrance and then lathered his own erection adequately, wiping the little excess on the florid bedspread. Light felt Ryuzaki removed himself from his position kneeling on Light’s pants and he grasped the younger man’s calves and lifted the legs into the air.

Ryuzaki slipped his head in-between Light’s legs, the pants that had caught Light’s ankles behind his head and the backs of Light’s knees on his shoulders. He steadied Light’s hips with one hand and kept the other on Light’s right thigh as he situated the tip of his penis onto the tight ring muscle. Light was exhausted and breathing hard and horribly drunk and Ryuzaki wasn’t even fucking waiting! Can’t a guy get some recuperation time, Dammit!?

Slowly, L pushed himself into Light before he was alert and able to fully comprehend the pain. Light, who didn’t know L’s hidden agenda, grimaced with pain at the large intrusion and his eyes were almost close –but he kept them open enough to glare up at Ryuzaki. Light could feel his face burning as Ryuzaki buried himself inside him. Once completely sheathed, L paused, looked at Light’s rather pained expression and the blush that amply graced his cheeks.

“Is it painful, Light-kun?” L inquired lowly.

“Now…who’s asking…stupid questions?” Light replied, attempting to even out his breathing that had become slightly erratic.

“I apologize, Light-kun,” L told him, and Light wasn’t sure if the admission of guilt was for the stupid question or the pain.

Pulling himself out slightly, Ryuzaki aimed at that certain spot that he’d memorized the location of. Then he back in quickly, causing Light to wince –right before he sucked in his breath and widened his eyes at the sudden shock of pleasure that ran through him like lightning. Seeing that widening of the eyes, Ryuzaki pulled out again, further this time and then drove himself back in a bit harder.

“Aah!” Light’s hips jerked forward to meet the plunge this time, the hit to his prostate even harder this time around.

L bent forward so that the top of Light’s thighs touched his chest and he bent his neck forward to brush his lips against the younger man’s. Doing this, however pushed himself even further inside Light and put more wonderful pressure on his prostate. In answer to this action, a long, deep groan was emitted from Light’s lips. L waited no longer.

He pulled out nearly all the way this time, aiming once again before thrusting in none to gently. He hit his mark and Light didn’t even have time to scream before Ryuzaki was driving inside him once more. Although he was still aching, the sharp jabs of ecstasy overpowered the soreness, making Light eagerly meet each of the thrusts.

Over and over again L’s manhood plummeted deep inside him, the walls constricting tightly around him. Compact. Hot. A flaming desire making him propel into him over and over and over again, their gazes connecting fiercely, causing their lovemaking to double in it’s smoldering intensity.

L kept going, entranced by the feelings that were being created in the pit of his stomach and the…. sexy look in Light’s dark, innocent orbs. Those eyes widened with every shove, those lips that gasped and cried out as he wrapped his hand around Light’s member and began pumping him in tune to each of his rough plunges. That sweat that was trickling over his chest and neck, the way his back arched and his fingers held so tightly to the covers he thought they might rip…

A flaming ball of heaven was building up L’s stomach and Light was adding fuel to the fire, and soon it would burst inside him. In and out in and out until they both thought the blissful rhythm would drive them to madness.

Light came first, his back bending and his head thrown back as his entire body tensed and shuddered as he came almost violently into Ryuzaki’s hand for the second time that night. As he tensed, everything contracted, the searing walls swallowing L’s manhood as took one final plunge into Light’s fiery depths. If that wasn’t enough, Light let out a piercing keen of elation, which pushed L over the edge.

As he reached the end of his orgasm, Light felt warm liquid explode inside him and he buckled, falling back down onto the bed, this time looking at Ryuzaki’s reaction. That usually platonic and blank face was scrunched up and his eyes were clamped tightly shut in mimicry of his mouth and he barely restrained his own yell. Light smirked.

L collapsed, exhausted onto Light’s chest, breathing hard.

Light stared up at the ceiling and unconsciously put a hand in Ryuzaki’s hair, running his fingers through the soft tresses.

“Hey, Ryuzaki.” Light said breathlessly.

“Yes, Light-kun?” L responded, too tired to be irritated.

“Your hair doesn’t seem natural.”

L sighed and moved so that his chin was in the hollow between Light’s pectorals.

“Shut up, Light-kun.”

“….I’d punch you if I weren’t so tired.”

“I am aware of that, Light-kun.”

“Oh,” Light said, and continued staring at the ceiling before he looked back down at Ryuzaki, “Hey, Ryuzaki.”

“Do I need to define ‘shut up’ to you, Light-kun?”

“No, Ryuzaki,” Light sighed, and mumbled something about how he’d forgot what he was going to say anyhow. Then, a few minutes later, Light thought of the idea again and looked back down at L, “Hey, Ryuzaki.”

Knowing the obstinate boy would not back down unless he answered him with something more substantial then a command to be quiet, L responded, “Yes, Light-kun?”

“Want to do it again?”

Blinking, surprised by this question, the side of his mouth quirked.

“Yes, Light-kun.”

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The sequel is called Love, For Sugar High Detectives. I really hope you all enjoyed this, and thanks so much for reviewing! Please do so for this last chapter too -I'd love comments ont he lemon. ^_~

See you at the sequel and -heh -sorry for being a tease.
AMV