Through the Looking Glass

Enthalpy

Light opened his eyes and stepped back as L pushed forward, but he didn't let go of L's tongue. Their lower bodies were no longer in contact, but Light still clutched L's soft cotton shirt as L slowed the pace of their kisses. It was strangely intimate kissing while looking at each other, thought Light. Their open mouthed kisses led to pecks, and gradually stopped as they rested their foreheads together.

"Ryuuzaki, why did we stop?"

"We shouldn't take things any further," hoarsely whispered L, straightening up.

"Ryuuzaki, I don't see any reason not to."

"I find that strange Light-kun, since I find plenty of reasons. For example: the investigation, your father, our age, our gender, Misa, just to name a few. Not to mention, the sustained isolation from the outside world," stated L. His voice growing evermore even.

"The investigation has gone cold, and you're hardly interested in it, anyway. Of course my father would be against it, if and when he found out, but its not his decision. Age and gender are negligible, we're both consenting adults. I hardly peg you as the type to care about things like gender, anyway. And Misa, HOW may times do I have to repeat myself. It's one-sided and I only feel a responsibility to her because it seems her world revolves around me!" The crescendo of Light's voice increasing dramatically when it came to Misa.

"Granted, Light-kun, that your reasoning is correct, but what worries me more is the effects of isolation," monotonously replied L, mask almost complete.

"You think because I've been in captivity and observation so long, I've developed some degree of Stockholm Syndrome?"

"Yes, Light-kun."

"I'm sorry, Ryuuzaki, you are once again wrong." L's eyes opened wide revealing deep slate irises and dilated pupils.

"This feeling has been there since the day I noticed you at the entrance exams. It has grown stronger every time I'm near you. You are unlike anyone I've met in my life. I thought we would be fine as friends, but I was only deluding myself."

"We have nothing but time, Light-kun. For now, we leave things as they are. Now, do you want to take a shower first," asked L curtly ending the escalating discussion.

"Do whatever you want, I'm going to bed." Light replied sourly.

He gathered his clothes and L led him back to their bed. Light turned suddenly, and L stopped so close to Light he could feel his moist breath against his lips. Light slowly raised his left wrist brushing lightly against L as he did. L was still emanating warmth, and that somewhat tempered Light's mood. As L unlocked Light's cuff, Light began to peel off his long sleeve shirt. The zipper pull on black ribbed shirt clinked as the shirt fell to the ground. L quickly reattached the cuff, secured Light to the bed post, and reluctantly walked away .

"Goodnight, Ryuuzaki," said Light.

Taking off his clothes in the bathroom, L noted a dark spot of wetness on his navy briefs. It was shocking to be so affected. L contemplated his options. He hadn't expected his hypothesis to be proven so quickly. Belying his earlier protests, L felt no regrets about the encounter other than genuine concern he could be taking advantage of Light in an emotionally handicapped state. If they started something under those circumstances it would be meaningless, right? Light would only think he was attracted to L while they were inseparable. Well, it could serve as an cheap emotional loophole in order to be intimate with Light yet keep him at arm's length emotionally. This way when Light was proved guilty, he could be able to let him go. L caught himself in his childishness. He wanted a way he could have everything. A relationship with Light, Light as Kira, and his life unharmed. L laughed bitterly into the spray of the artificial downpour. He couldn't have all three. Well, he could, but it pivoted on the naïve thought that maybe Light wasn't Kira.

L finished his shower and returned to the bedroom. He had forgotten to turn off the light switch, but Light had fallen asleep anyway. L saw a pile of clothes next to Light's side of the bed, and picked up the articles. Light's shirt, Light's jeans, Light's boxers. L played back his memories, and didn't recall Light getting another pair of underwear before being chained to the bed. That would mean Light was 99% likely not wearing any. He felt a crimson heat flush his face. L got into bed, reached over Light to attach his shackle, and turned off the lights. For the first time in weeks, L didn't sleep a wink.

L lay rigidly in bed watching the tangerine sunrise to distract himself from the temptation in his bed. Light was sprawled on his side with the sheets barely keeping him decent. I should have turned the air conditioning down, he thought wickedly, as he stole a glance at Light's bared chest. His long limbs splayed about looking as though he had a long, exerting night. The agony. L blankly stared out the window, again, thinking about what Light had said the night before. He'd felt this way since the entrance exams. Well, he could one up Light in that respect. He'd felt the spark much earlier while watching Light in his home. The whole period of surveillance, L had felt drawn to the taunting intelligence behind Light's perfect projection. Yet, as much as he argued both sides of the dilemma all night with himself, by dawn he had made a choice. Lawliet saw himself in a crystalline, glittering sea facing the shore with only Light in the way of a white sandy expanse. He would have to tread the waters slowly and cautiously towards Light, so that he would still be able to see his path clearly. Hopefully, both would make it to the shore.

Light could smell it so vividly, sandalwood. He was in limbo between sleep and reality. Light turned toward the fragrant air, still unable to open his eyes. He felt the warmth of L's thigh under his and began instinctively rubbing his knee where he knew L's groin was. He buried his face in the detective's scent, and was awakened by a stern hand on his shoulder.

"Good morning, Light-kun."

"Yes, it is, Ryuuzaki," murmured Light into L's mane, taking one last whiff. Light looked at L as he sat up, and noticed the rings under his eyes darkening again. L didn't look like he had much sleep. He must have been shocked into reverting to old habits.

"Can I take a shower?"

A/N: It seems like my fic centers around showers, ha ha…that two way glass did me in. Let's see how long I can keep that plot device going! And hopefully, this angst will go away soon too…