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Why?	By : Anestshia Category: +M to R > Ouran High Host Club Views: 2040 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Ouran High School Host Club, nor the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
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WARNING! There is a VERY dubious consent scene in this chapter! There is also speak of whether or not it was rape! Please SKIP THIS if that will bother you!

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“Explain this?! How can you fucking explain this?!” Tamaki didn’t go off often but when he did, it was spectacular. This was one of those times. He pulled back, stumbling away from the bed as he looked down at the sticky liquid on his hand. He tried to calm himself down, leveling a glare at his boyfriend as he took in shaky breaths. “Who the hell have you been screwing?”
Kyoya swallowed thickly then, his body trembling as he pushed himself to his feet, trying to stand his ground against Tamaki. He had never expected him to find out so his mind was all in a jumble. He knew what he had done was wrong, he really did; Tamaki had just never shown this level of… malice before. “That… is that really…”
“It’s important!” Tamaki yelled, grabbing the front of Kyoya’s shirt and yanking him forward, bright purple eyes filled with fury. “Is that who’s been hurting you like this? What have you been hiding from me?!”
“Tamaki… please…” Kyoya reached up to hold onto the other man’s wrist, shaking at the tight grip on his shirt. This Tamaki scared him; it was like nothing he’d ever seen before. He’d seen him happy, he’d seem him sad, he’d seen him gloomy… but he’d never seen him furious. “Just be… mad at me…”
“I am fucking mad at you!” Tamaki shoved the other man back, ignoring it when he fell to the bed, the wounds he’d been so worried about moments before not even entering his thoughts. “You let me fawn over you, take care of you and all that time you’ve been letting someone else fuck you?! How can I ever trust you after this?!” His chest was heaving as he yelled, his body shaking in barely contained rage. He took in a calming breath, able to speak without yelling like a lunatic after that. “Tell me… who you’ve been sleeping with.” He took in another breath, closing his eyes as he clenched his fists. “And about all these… wounds.”
Kyoya swallowed nervously, shaking as he gripped the sheets of the bed, his eyes wide as he looked up. Tamaki was confusing him and scaring him all at the same time. He’d expected him to storm away, not stick around after discovering that. He gathered his thoughts before pushing himself back up, sitting on the bed and looking up at the other man. “Who it is… isn’t important.” He murmured, reaching down to grip his shirt, trying not to look as frightened as he was. He didn’t want to lose Tamaki. He knew what he’d done was wrong but… he still didn’t want to lose him.
He stood again then, standing before the still enraged blond. “The wounds…” He reached down to touch the bruises, taking a deep breath before speaking again. “They aren’t… wounds. They’re… the sex…” He took a step back when it looked like the other man was ready to hit him, his eyes wide as he watched him. “Rough… I like… but what we do together…” He wasn’t explaining it well, that much he could tell. He deserved every dirty look he got; he’d just never thought it would turn out like this. “I love us together-”
“Apparently not enough!” Tamaki’s hands were balled into first, his knuckles white from the force he was using to keep them at his sides. He closed his eyes, taking a deep breath before speaking again, his voice unnaturally soft for the situation and how he’d been acting. “You want rough?”
Kyoya wasn’t sure how to react to that, just swallowing softly as he slowly nodded his head. “I… I’m so sorry… I know it was wrong, I… I just…”
“Shut up.” Tamaki advanced slowly on the other man, then, his eyes narrowed dangerously. “You want rough?” He grabbed Kyoya lightening fast right after the words, shoving him hard enough to tumble him to the ground. He was over him just moments later, gripping his chin roughly, leaving finger shaped bruises on his skin. “Fine! I’ll give you rough!”
“Tam-” Kyoya wasn’t ready for it when a demanding mouth was suddenly over his, the uncontrolled kiss full of tongue and teeth. He let out a pained noise when his lip split from the force of it, pushing at Tamaki, wanting to get the man to calm down some. It wasn’t right to do this now; neither of them were in their right minds! All he got for his struggle was his wrists being grabbed and shoved above his head roughly, pinned to the floor by surprisingly strong hands.
It all moved so quickly, one moment Tamaki was biting his neck hard enough to draw blood and the next he was flat on his stomach with his pants yanked down and his glasses skittering across the floor from the force he’d been flipped at. Intellectually, he didn’t want it; he needed the other man to stop before they got too deep. But his body… it betrayed him. Even when pain shot up his spine from a very rough, almost violent insertion, he couldn’t stop the soft moan from bubbling up his throat. Mori had always been careful with the first thrust… this was rougher than anything the bigger man had ever done.
He’d never expected Tamaki had it in him.
He’d always been so gentle, kisses and soft caresses paving the way to their sex. It was like a flip had switched and a completely different blond was there now, one that had no care for what his partner was feeling. He cried out when the other man thrust inside of him hard enough to force him against the ground, tears coming to his eyes from it. There was a painful burning that just wasn’t going away; like something had ripped inside of him.
Thankfully it was over just as quickly as it had began, his body quivering when Tamaki pulled back suddenly from him before either of them finished. Kyoya looked up, unshed tears still clinging to his lashes, his beaten and debauched body too weak to move as the blond stood over him. “Ta… Tamaki…”
“I can’t even look at you anymore.” Tamaki felt dirty all over, his skin crawling as he looked down at the dark haired man. “You… are not the Kyoya I used to know. If you’d just told me… I could have been everything you needed.” He took a stumbling step back after speaking, his fists clenching again from the rage still boiling under his skin. “I never want to see you again. Never!”
Kyoya whimpered, letting his head fall back against the ground, his forehead grinding into the cold marble as his tears fell. This was not how he’d wanted it to turn out, even worst case scenario… it had never been this bad. He just couldn’t stop asking himself… why? Why had he done it in the first place? Why couldn’t he just be happy?
Why?
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Even after countless, burning showers and nearly half a week, Tamaki still felt dirty and used. He couldn’t focus on anything, not even his customers. Every time one of the other workers tried to talk to him, he’d go off or completely ignore them. He just couldn’t get over it; his heart had been broken by the one person that he thought would never hurt him! They had been together for years, who would have thought that this was how it would turn out? And then he’d done that… he’d all but raped the man. He’d been bleeding when he finally got control of himself! How could he have done that? Kyoya may have cheated but it still wasn’t the right way to treat him. He couldn’t help feeling horrible about it.
“You look like hell, even Beelzenef couldn’t help you.”
Tamaki jumped when the voice appeared from out of nowhere, reaching up to press his hand against his chest. His heart was beating like mad; of course, it did every time Nekozawa got too close to him. He didn’t know why they’d hired him… it had just seemed natural at the time. If everyone from high school was going to be working in the same place, the creepy black magic president should be there. He made a damned good bartender, too.
“I don’t… need Beelzenef’s help…” He’d gotten over believing that the man’s curses were real not long after they got out of high school but that didn’t mean he was completely comfortable with him. “I just need some time alone.”
“Ahhh, this about Kyoya cheating on you?” Nekozawa asked, cocking his head as he looked down at the man.
“H… how… how do you know that?” Tamaki’s eyes went wide as he looked up at the man, his old, suppressed fears of him being psychic coming back up again. “You’re not… reading my mind, are you?”
“No, no, of course not.” Nekozawa just chuckled then, a bit of his blond hair showing under his trademark black wig as he leaned forward. “I’m the bartender, I know everything.” He moved back then, patting his chest with a slight grin. “And it was pretty obvious. Those types of wounds and how satisfied he looked after them. It was a dead giveaway.”
“And you didn’t tell me, why?” Tamaki asked, standing up with his arms crossed over his chest, huffing at the other man. “Wouldn’t you think this was something I would want to know?”
“How was I to know that you didn’t know?” Nekozawa retorted, crossing his arms over his chest as he watched the other blond. “I’m not psychic, as much as you like to think I am.”
“You’re the bartender, you know everything!” Tamaki responded, throwing the man’s words back in his face. He deflated after that, though, sighing heavily as he fell back down into his chair. He reached up, scrubbing his face harshly with his hands before looking at Nekozawa again. “I need someone to talk to.”
“Well then…” Nekozawa sat in the seat across from him, his gloved hands folded together as he looked over at him. “Speak. Every bartender is a part time therapist, after all.”
In any other situation, Tamaki would have chuckled at the statement. Now, he just sighed, lifting his hand to rest his head on his palm, his body sinking down in the chair more. “It’s like I’m lost.” He said, raising his free hand and shaking it a little bit. “I just… I’ve been with him so long. If I don’t have him… what do I have?”
“Hmm.” Nekozawa tapped the arm of his chair, shaking his head a bit. “It sounds like your relationship has become more and more toxic. It’s not good for either of you.”
“But it wasn’t… it was perfect.” Tamaki sighed as he looked up into the other’s blue eyes, pushing his own hair back from his face. “If I hadn’t found out… none of this would have happened. I wouldn’t have stooped so low and done something like that. I’m just as… toxic as he is.” He murmured, reusing Nekozawa’s word since he couldn’t find a better one. What he’d done… it had been horrible and unforgivable. He wouldn’t be surprised if they never spoke again and… even though he had said it was what he wanted, it really wasn’t. He wanted so badly to forgive Kyoya just because he didn’t feel like he could be without him.
Nekozawa raised an eyebrow, humming at the cryptic response. He reached out, snapping his fingers to get Tamaki’s attention before he spoke again. “Tamaki… what happened? I only heard that you two got in a fight.”
“Heh and I thought bartenders knew everything?” Tamaki shook his head, giving the man a sardonic smile before looking up at the coffered ceiling. “I raped him… and then I left him there.”
“That…” Nekozawa cleared his throat, patting his chest before sitting forward. “I’m sure that’s overreacting…” He couldn’t see Tamaki raping anyone, especially not someone he cared so much about. “I mean… did he tell you no?”
“No.” Tamaki sighed, looking back at the other man. “But he tried to push me away… and I wouldn’t let him. I thought he deserved it after what he’d done to me.” He looked down at his hands, still feeling sick inside about what he’d done with them. Even if it wasn’t rape, it still felt like it. He’d never wanted to see someone like that because of him; he’d promised the first time that he went into a blind rage that it wouldn’t happen again. But still, it had… and he felt just as sick as he had the first time. “I’m a disgusting person.”
“No, this is just a… disgusting situation.” Nekozawa sighed, moving forward in his chair, reaching out to touch the other man’s knee softly. “We’ll all get through it. We just… we can’t think that way. We’re all still a team, we need to act like it. There’s bound to be some sort of… problems.”
“I still don’t know who was fucking him.” Tamaki looked up at Nekozawa then, cocking his head at the man. “Do you know? You said you knew what was going on.”
Nekozawa just sat back then, clearing his throat as he looked to the side. “No.” He said before standing quickly, grabbing the tray he’d sat down when he’d started talking to Tamaki. “I have to get back to work. I’m sorry, we can talk more later.”
Tamaki reached up, making a soft sound when the man disappeared back behind the bar. He could see that lie from a mile away, anyone would be able to. He just sighed, rubbing his eyes and shaking his head. He’d figure out later, for now he just needed to be alone. He needed time to think.
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“It was you, wasn’t it?”
Mori wasn’t surprised Honey had figured it out so fast, the man was small, not stupid. He’d just hoped he wouldn’t. “There’s no use lying. It was me.”
Honey sighed as he sat, looking completely serious, something that never boded well. “Why?” He asked, much more calm than Tamaki had been with Kyoya. “What would ever make you think you had to sneak around behind my back like that?”
“I didn’t want to hurt you.” Mori responded truthfully, sighing as he watched the smaller man. What he’d done was supremely stupid… especially with how Honey felt about everything he… needed. “Physically or…”
“Hurt me? Like you could hurt me.” Honey chuckled then, shaking his head as he reached up and pushed his hair back. “Really, you thought you had to hide this? Who was it that let you screw the twins when you felt this type of… need before?” He stood then, crossing his arms as he stood in front of the bigger man. “Was it because it was Kyoya, is he something special? Just tell me why, Mori.”
“I…” Mori swallowed thickly, looking down at his hands with a heavy sigh. “That… is the same question I’ve been asking myself every time.” He murmured, clenching his hands tight before looking back up at the other man. “I really… I really don’t know.”
“Well, we’ll have to figure it out then.” Honey sat down across from him again, shaking his head a little bit. “And I’m not letting you out of my sight until we settle this, understood?”
Mori just nodded, not really sure what to think about the tone of the other man’s voice. He could be scary, very scary, even to someone as strong as him. He’d expected to be pushed away… not watched like a hawk. He wasn’t sure whether or not it was a good thing. “Understood.” He murmured, leaning back when Honey stood again, walking towards him.
Honey was going to take a different tact than Tamaki. He wasn’t going to give up what he and Mori had over something like this. “Now.” He reached up; grabbing the tie the other man was wearing, dragging him forward with it. “I’m going to remind you just why I’m all you need.”
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A week later, Mori and Kyoya were in a room alone again, just looking at each other like it was the last time they would see the other male. Mori was the first one to speak, his hands in his pockets as he looked down. “We have to tell them all.” He murmured, shifting slowly, feeling like he didn’t know where to look. He couldn’t risk them throwing everything to the wind and risking it again, their relationships were tenuous enough.
“Yeah.” Kyoya agreed, looking towards the door where he could hear their other club members chatting. He blew out a shaky breath, reaching up to adjust his glasses before speaking again. “Just know… this will be the first Tamaki is figuring out who it was. I never… told him… when everything happened.”
Mori nodded, heading towards the door. “I’ll remember that.” He wanted to get it over with then see if they could repair the damage it would do the club. He didn’t want it to fall apart; they’d all been through a lot for it. “Are you ready?”
Kyoya just nodded, pushing his hands into his pockets as he walked forward. He winced a little when he stepped out into the light, taking a deep breath when he saw all eyes on them. It was like everyone already knew; they were just waiting for confirmation. He closed his eyes when Mori spoke, praying that everything would go well.
“Everyone, we have an announcement.”

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WARNING! There is a VERY dubious consent scene in this chapter! There is also speak of whether or not it was rape! Please SKIP THIS if that will bother you!
SOOOOOO! Here is the long awaited third chapter of Why? According to my poll responses, you all wanted it!
I decided to spell his name 'Honey', once again, from the poll response. It seems to be what most people think is right!
Well... i hope you all like it! I don't know how many more chapters there will be... a couple more, at least. I don't have an update schedule for this *shrugs* I hope at least once a week but i don't know!
Thank you for reading! Don't forget to feed the author!
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