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Aspirations	By : Demonic_Host Category: +M to R > My Hero Academia Views: 13851 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own anything from My Hero Academia. I make no money from this.

Chapter List
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Aspirations
Chapter 32

There was a knock on your door. One that didn’t go away despite the fact that you ignored it. On the third knock you finally got up from your spot on your couch. If someone was knocking that incessantly there was a good chance that someone needed help. Despite the worry that had been eating you alive along with guilt, you forced yourself to open the door.

“Yes?” You asked quietly, your voice raspy from disuse.

Aizawa looked entirely unimpressed with your lackluster appearance. You’d kept yourself locked in your room for the last couple of days since the Nabu island incident. Which would explain why you weren’t dressed for the holiday party unlike the man before you. That Santa hat looked completely out of place on his head. Though if you’d been in a better mood maybe it would have more than spread a weak smile over your lips.

“The students are throwing a party downstairs,” Aizawa said plainly.

Though he hadn’t actually said it, the question of why you weren’t down there hung in the air. You nodded in acknowledgment of his words as you let out a deep breath. It was obvious that Aizawa wasn’t about to leave. Which became especially obvious as he took a half step closer. You moved back, moving out of the way while still holding the door open. Aizawa walked in, sticking his hands in his pocket. You moved back over towards your small sofa, sat down, and stared at the different hand written letters on the table in front of you.

When you lifted your eyes back up, Aizawa was the first one to speak up. “I brought Eri over. She’s downstairs.”

“Okay.”

“You should come see her.”

“Maybe later? I’m not feeling very festive this year and I don’t want to spoil the mood,” was your honest response.

You gathered the letters in front of you into one pile before flipping the collection over. Aizawa came to sit next to you, frowning. He pulled the Santa hat off of his head. He sat just far enough away that you didn’t feel smothered.

“What’s wrong?”

“Just…have a lot of thoughts.”

Aizawa made a sound of acknowledgement that was so quiet you almost missed it. You stayed leaned forward with your elbows on your knees.

“You were right,” you whispered. The mask you’d tried to uphold started to slip as your lips twitched into a troubled frown and you stared out at nothing. “I…I was being stupid.”

“You were trying to help.”

He said that so reasonably and calmly now. A depreciating sound akin to a laugh fell from your lips.

“I’m always trying to help. Doesn’t mean I wasn’t being stupid. So much could have gone wrong and I didn’t think about that till after.”

“You didn’t do anything wrong.”

Aizawa relaxed back into your sofa, arms spreading out over the back. You resisted the urge to curl into yourself more but Aizawa watched as your head dropped. He moved his arm closest to you so that it rested around your shoulders, pulling you to his side. He was surprisingly warm. Or perhaps it was because you had just been feeling cold since the fight.

“You didn’t run into the fight. A pro-hero commandeered your services.”

“You make me sound like a ship,” you grumbled as you tried to relax beside him; half of you really wanted to snuggle into the warmth he radiated.

“You’re more useful than that.”

“That’s kind of what I’m afraid of…”

Aizawa gripped your shoulder reassuringly but said nothing. You let out a shaky breath as you worried your hands in the cuffs of your long sleeved robe. The silence went on until you found the courage to break it.

“I talked to two kids on the island. They said that the main villain was after the young boy’s healing quirk. That he could…steal the quirk.”

From the way that Aizawa responded physically, you could tell that you had brought up something that he hadn’t wanted to talk about. Normally you wouldn’t have dreamed of pushing him for classified information outside of his own body. Right now though you needed as much information as you could get so that you made the best choice for the future.

“I tried to read the public report…what was left of it after the Commission redacted it for the public…but it didn’t really tell me anything. And I need to know. You…Principal Nezu…even Endeavor…you’ve all been earning me to be careful. You and Nezu especially wanted to make sure that I don’t let villains, or anyone know what I can do. To not draw attention to myself. And you brought up someone taking my quirk. …was it because of that guy?”

“No.”

Fuck.

Your breath hitched.

“Some else can steal quirks?”

You had to ask. You didn’t want to know the answer. You needed to know.

“Yes.”

“…fuck,” you breathed out, flinching when you realized that hadn’t been inside your head. “Are they more or less of a threat than the guy the kids caught?”

“More.”

His words, while short, were at least honest. It was more than you had gotten from all the documents you’d tried to read about the situation. Red tape was kind of a bitch that way.

“…if…that guy…the white haired one from the island…if he had my quirk, the boys wouldn’t have won huh?”

Aizawa shook his head slowly. “They’re looking into it. His body was breaking down on the cellular level which was why he was after the boy’s quirk.”

“I don’t heal at the cellular level,” you murmured.

Aizawa didn’t comment which really only made you feel confused on top of everything. Had you missed something? Something about yourself that seemed obvious to him? Nezu had pointed out that you were still young. Technically, just like the students, you were still developing your quirk as the years went on. Refining it, understanding it better. Who was to say what the limits really were? It wasn’t like you had tested them…it wasn’t like you had pushed yourself…

“That’s why you were angry, huh?” You spoke back up in a quiet voice. “If he took my quirk, if he could heal…beating him…a lot of people could have died…”

Aizawa nodded. You clenched your jaw. There was more to it. You could practically feel how he was holding his tongue so he didn’t give away state secrets. Or something along those lines. Your hands hurt from the odd twisting and bending you were doing with them so you tried to relax them against your knees. Only you ended up gripping the fabric there.

What you needed to do was becoming clearer by the second. But with every second you felt like that future was getting closer to suffocating you.

“And the good guys would be down a healer too…no wonder you were so pissed at me all the time…”

“Stop,” Aizawa commended quietly. “You’re safe now, you’re safe here with me.”

“I’d be safer if I had been trained as a hero right?” You asked in a pained voice. “If I was able to actually fight…if I’d trained…or there was an offensive aspect to my quirk that made it harder to take me down, it would be safer for everyone. There’d be another hero out there, one that could look out for themselves and heal others.”

He didn’t have to answer that one. You’d been thinking about it a lot. Everyone’s words and sentiments had been going through your head for days now. You’d been having to re-evaluate your plans for the greater good. And all of those worries were laid out in different letters. Each one with different choices based on the same conclusion. Just saying what had started to become obvious to you was helping you choose which path to walk down.

And that terrified you.

You weren’t ready for the future.

But how could you keep your head buried in the sand after everything that had happened around you?

“You should go. Eri is probably waiting for you.”

Aizawa nodded in acceptance of your words but made no move to get back up. In fact he tilted his head onto yours and let out a deep breath. You squeezed your eyes closed as you finally gave in to the urge. When you curled up into Aizawa’s side, legs tucking up beside you, the pro-hero said nothing about it.

You felt him kiss the top of your head and somehow…a little more of you cracked inside.

Life wasn’t easy, it wasn’t always fair.

That fact above all else was something you’d learned over the last decade. Didn’t mean you had to like it or accept everything without a fight. You wanted to cling to the gentleness and affection that Aizawa was capable of in the quiet moments but you knew you couldn’t.

The future was going at you like a locomotive.

Something had to move, something had to give. It just looked like for the good of everyone you cared about that had to be your own hopes and desires.

“I’d invite you to bed for more than cuddles right now but you have a little girl that needs to be tucked in tonight,” you said with a weak smile, trying to keep your tone lighter than it had been all evening.

You heard Aizawa say your name in a slightly reprimanding tone.

“Hm?” You asked as you looked up at his face.

“Prepositions like that aren’t a joke.”

…you hadn’t actually been joking.

The fact that he thought you had been hurt. You just hid it before Aizawa picked up on it. If he thought you were joking you supposed that was the final nail on that possible future. If he thought that was just a joke, not a real possibility, You figured Aizawa really did just see you as a friend…or something along those lines.

“I’ll see you next year?” You asked as you pushed away from him.

Next calendar year was just over a week away. There was a lot you needed to get done before classes resumed and you consigned yourself over to the future. Bucket list and all of that.

Aizawa nodded and stood up slowly. You walked him to the door as curiosity dictated. Before you closed it, as you walked away, you called out to him quietly. Aizawa paused and looked back.

“I hadn’t been joking you know,” you said with the same depreciating, wavering smile from earlier. “But I get it. Don’t worry. Tell Eri sweet dreams from me?”

You closed the door before your words sunk into his head. When they did, Aizawa’s eyes widened and his mouth parted. The only thing stopping him from going back into your quarters was the fact that there was a little girl downstairs that needed him. Not that you knew that of course.

You had some travel plans to arrange.

________________________________________

“You.”

Aizawa looked up from his desk to see a perturbed old lady moving towards him. In particular that old lady just happened to be Recovery Girl. He started to stand up out of respect but the moment she got close enough, Recovery Girl wrapped his knees with her cane. Aizawa flinched and stayed in his seat, thoroughly confused.

“What did you say to my niece?”

Aizawa’s brows knitted together in confusion. Apparently he didn’t answer fast enough for her as she “lovingly” tapped one of his hands.

“What did you say?”

“She asked me about the dangers. And started to realize that she needed to train.”

Recovery Girl puffed up. She went for his other hand which Aizawa had been able to move out of the way just in time.

“That isn’t what happened!” The older nurse exclaimed in a perturbed tone. “I should put you over my knee and give you a good spanking. After all the hard work I put into trying to get you two together—!”

“This isn’t appropriate to talk about at work,” Aizawa murmured to her.

“You’re always working,” Recovery Girl pointed out. “The two of you are so similar it’s painful to watch sometimes!”

She huffed and puffed for a moment in absolute frustration. Aizawa might have been completely confused about what was going on but he understood that something had upset the older heroine. Something that had to do with you. That was enough to get his full attention and to worry him at the same time.

What had you told her about last night?

What did she know?

Aizawa frowned heavily as he looked at your great aunt. What could she know? It wasn’t like anyone other than the cats that magically found their way to his quarters would know that he’d spent the whole night kicking himself in the ass. That he’d been so close to going back to your room in the students dorm once Eri was out like a light. Even President Mic, his closest friend, didn’t know. So there was no way that Recovery Girl knew and wanted to chastise him for the inappropriateness of his struggle, right?

“What happened? What did I do wrong to piss you off?”

If he was going to get blamed for something, he at least wanted to know what she knew and blamed him. That seemed only fair. And instead of beating around the bush it only seemed logical to ask her out right.

Recovery Girl gave into the urge to use her cane to smack him on the side of his leg. Aizawa winced. Whatever she thought he’d done must have been bad if she was resorting to so much violence against him.

“You should have stayed with her!” The older woman said with a huff. “She finally asked you and you say no? What kind of man are you?!”

It was surprising how quickly the heat rose to his face in front of an elder. Which was odd because he’d been worried that she’d been pissed at the many things he’d been thinking about last night. Instead she seemed upset that he’d not acted on them!

“Well I hope you’re proud of yourself sonny boy. She’s gone now.”

Aizawa looked at her despite the embarrassment he felt over the whole situation. “What do you mean gone? Where is she?”

Maybe he should have been checking his phone. He’d just been trying to avoid knowing that you were still in your room. Your room in the dorms not too far away from where he’d been, where he could have gotten to at any point of the night. You’d been so upset last night though that even after you told him you hadn’t been joking, he knew the timing was bad. You might not have thought you were joking but in that kind of emotional stare you might not have meant it either. You might have regretted extending the offer when you calmed down…if he’d taken you up on it. That moral quandary had been one of the things which had kept him at his own place all night. Apparently Recovery Girl thought he’d made the wrong choice though.

“She took a trip to see her father.”

“It’s New Years.”

He was going to have a bruise from how many times he was getting hit with that cane today.

“She doesn’t get along with my nephew,” Recovery Girl huffed. “She’s going to visit her mom.”

Who was dead. Aizawa’s frown continued. He still had no idea why she was so upset.

“Is that unusual?”

“Yes,” Recovery Girl huffed. “Why didn’t you stay the night? It’s not like it would have hurt you! Do you know how long and hard I’ve worked to see the two of you happy together?! Wasted! Now she’s going to say yes to being a brood mare for the Commission because she’s so worried about the future!”

And the world decided to lurch to a halt. The look on his face must have expressed his shock enough to stop Recovery Girl’s triads.

“What? She didn’t tell you when you were rejecting her?” Recover girl shook her head and huffed.

Aizawa slowly shook his head no.

“They’ve been contacting her for years to enroll in their hero reproduction program,” she said in a tone that told him exactly what she thought about that. “They tried to recruit her right out of High School to donate egg, womb, and quirk for the next generation of heroes. She’s told them no till now but this morning she told me she decided it was for the better. That the world needed a healer that was a better fighter, a better healer!”

“That’s ridiculous.”

The old woman nodded in agreement. “She doesn’t think so after what happened. She thinks she’s thinking of the future but I find the whole concept repulsive! It’s worse than those Quirk Marriages that were all the rage in my day!”

“If she’s visiting her mother’s grave, nothing has been finalized. You can convince her when she gets back that whatever arrangement she’s made with the Commission is impractical.”

He was grumbling on the outside. Inside he was kicking himself. Again.

Damn it he should have offered to help teach you to protect yourself like he was with Shinzo. If he had known that turning yourself over for a quirk breeding program was what you’d been thinking about when you’d talked about being stronger, he would have dissuade you from that line of thinking.

He had been kicking himself so hard that he almost missed the furious look on Recovery Girl’s face.

“I’ve tried! She doesn’t want to listen to me. And what’s worse is that she’s stopping off in Bangkok before coming back here!”

“That’s worse?”

Recovery girl nodded and huffed and puffed again.

“Why?”

Aizawa couldn’t be sure but he felt like he was missing something. Especially when she lovingly smacked him in the same part of his leg again.

“Because you turned her down!” The sound she made in frustration only highlighted the fact that it was easy to imagine steam pouring out of her ears at this point. “So she’s spending her hard earned money on—oh it makes me so angry! To think a pretty girl like her…she’s my niece, if she had just gone out more…! She was looking through lists of professionals on her phone at the airport like she was shopping for shoes! It’s just not right and it’s all your fault Eraserhead!”

He was left standing there in shock when Recovery girl spun around in outrages and stormed back to her office to cool down. Aizawa’s thoughts turned a little bit slower.

You…

You were hiring a prostitute…

It was legal in Bangkok, Thailand. Somewhere in the back of his mind told him that. You were trying to respect the law. It was logical. Reasonable.

But…

Aizawa wasn’t so sure what was going on with his relationship with reason and logic because suddenly murdering whoever touches you felt like the reasonable thing to do too.
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Aspirations