Gojyo\'s Guide to the Art of Lovemaking

Summary: Hakkai is sleeping, and Sanzo is pouting... what better things to do than play cards and practice foreplay?

Disclaimer: Gensomaden Saiyuki is property of Minekura Kazuya.

Rating: NC-17

Pairings: Sanzo/Goku, Gojyo/Goku, Sanzo/Goku/Gojyo

Warnings: Yaoi, lemon. Don't like it? Don't read. (After three chapters I'm keeping it short and simple, lol.)

Author's Note: Poor, poor Sanzo. Lol! He'll get his, though. *wink*
~~

*Gojyo Guide he Ahe Art of Lovemaking, Chapter Four*

Around six o'clock, the men returned to the inn to rest before heading out again. According to Hakkai's calculations, they would probably reach a hot spring sometime the next evening, where they could spend the rest of the night, and the night after that, relishing in some much-needed luxury.

"I don't know about you guys, but I'm going to get some sleep," Hakkai said, as he closed the door to his room. "It's going to be a long day of driving tomorrow. Have a good night!"

"'Night, Hakkai," Gojyo replied. "I guess I'll just chill in my room. How 'bout you guys?"

When he turned around, Sanzo was nowhere to be found. "Huh. Okay, how 'bout you, Goku?"

Goku scratched his head. "Well, if it's alright maybe I could hang out with you?"

"Fine by me," Gojyo answered as he opened his door. "Maybe we'll play some cards, continue our lesson...?"

"You always win at cards!" Goku complained. "But, I guess so." Even though they argued most of the time, Gojyo was a fun person to hang out with. And with Sanzo currently mad at him, he could use all the diversion he could get.

~~

As Gojyo shuffled the cards, he asked Goku the same question as before. "What do you and Sanzo do for foreplay?"

"You already asked me that, stupid."

"You didn't give me any details," Gojyo said.

Goku wrinkled his nose. "Ew, so you can go in the bathroom and jerk off?"

"Shut up! I wouldn't jerk off to you, even if you paid me!" Gojyo shouted as he dealt.

When Goku picked tup, up, he stared intently at his poor hand. 'Dammit, he must have cheated again,' he thought.

"You know, Goku, poker is kind of like sex. You gotta put on your best face."

"Huh?" the boy asked, looking up from his cards. "I didn't hear you."

Sighing, Gojyo put his cards down. "I said, with that face I already know you have a shitty hand. You're staring at them like you don't know what the hell to do. Cut the deck."

"What should I be doing?" Goku asked, confused.

"Pretyou'you're seducing the cards."

Goku raised his eyebrow. "Oh, like seducing the tree? You really are a freak of nature."

"Insult me again and I'll kill you." Gojyo replied. "Anyway, try looking at your cards and your opponents casually. Play it cool, like you would if you were seducing someone."

"Okay," Goku said, as he relaxed his face and impassively gazed at his unfavorable hand.

"That's how you do it! Good job, monkey." Gojyo leaned back and smiled proudly. "I should do this for a living."

"Now that you know I have a shitty hand, can we deal again?"

"Fuck no! Anyway," Gojyo said, trying to remember what they were just talking about. "Oh yeah! Foreplay. Details."

"Ugh," Goku scowled. "You better not whack off to this. Pervert."

He paused, expecting some sort of clever retort from Gojyo. But when the haughty half-demon did nothing but roll his eyes, Goku continued. "Well, like I said, I jerk him off for a little bit."

"What's a little bit?"

"Uh," Goku eredered. "Maybe... a few seconds?" He shrugged, for he already knew what Gojyo was going to say about *that*.

Surprisingly, Gojyo considered his answer for a few moments. "Well, I guess it depends on the situation, really. If you two want to 'make love', as you *monogamous* couples put it, then I'd say you should touch a little longer. Do you jerk him quickly?"

"Um, yeah." Goku's face turned red. 'I can't believe I'm talking to him about this,' he thought.

"Hey," Gojyo said, slapping him on the arm. "Don't be embarrassed. It's *me* you're talking to. Anyhow, you should go slowly next time. Get him a little worked up."

The boy nodded demurely. Inside, he prayed that none of this information would ever get out. Because if it did, he'd probably die... of humiliation *and* Sanzo's wrath.

"Yeah, like I said before, slower is better," Gojyo said. "Hey! Maybe I should teach you how to give a good hand job!"

The inspired kappa stood up, and reached for his backpack beside the bed, much to the abhorrence of Goku.

"Wha... what are you doing?" he asked, a look of perturbation on his face.

"I said, I'm going to teach you the proper hand job technique!" Gojyo said, still digging in his backpack. "Man! What can we use as a cock?"

"A cock?" Goku exclaimed. "I'm not going to..."

"What did you think we were going to do, dumbass? Sit and *talk* about sex? Nobody learns from lecturing- what you need is hands-on training!"

"Fuck that!" Goku hollered, as he stood up. "I'm not going to have you sit and watch me jerk off... something! Besides, I know how to give a hand job! I'm not *stupid.*"

"Oh but there is a technique, Goku. Cock... a cock..." Gojyo put his hand to his temple. "I know! Hakkai went shopping for groceries today- I told him to buy some bananas. For you, of course."

"God, you suck," Goku replied peevishly.

Gojyo threw his hands in the air. "What can I say? I'll be right back, monkey. Don't escape, now!"

"Fine, whatever."

But as soon as Gojyo left, Goku stood up and crept towards the door. He paused for a few moments, allowing time for Hakkai to wake up, open the door, and let Gojyo in. After a few seconds passed, Goku tiptoed through the hallway, and sneaked into his own room.

~~

When Gojyo returned, he opened the door and said buoyantly, with banana in hand, "I'm back, monkey! Time to practice!" But as he realized that Goku had indeed escaped, he irritably turned around and headed
down the hallway.

"That little fucker," he grumbled. When he reached Goku's door, he pounded on it angrily. "Let me in! I told you not to leave!"

"Shut up!" Goku screamed from the other side. "Don't be so loud!"

"If you don't let me in I will be!" Gojyo hollered. Then, putting his hand to the side of his mouth, elleelled, "Goku?! Where are you?! Time for hand job..."

"Shithead!" Goku opened the door wildly, and glared at him. "I hate you!"

Gojyo grinned as he stepped inside the room. "That's what I thought."

The boy's eyes were aflame as Gojyo sat down on his bed. "Get your filthy ass off my bed!"

"Make me, you stupid chimp! I'll shove this banana up your ass!"

"I always knew you wanted to fuck my ass!"

"The fuck if I do!" Gojyo screamed. "I wouldn't touch your ass with a 50-foot pole!"

"If both of you don't shut up, *I'll* shove this *gun* up your asses!" Sanzo shouted from behind the closed door. "God...*dammit*!"

"Shit! Sorry, Sanzo!" Goku called out. "We'll be quiet!" Turning to Gojyo, he muttered, "You stupid... why do you want to embarrass me so bad?"

"Because you suck," Gojyo answered as he pushed Goku off the bed. "Anyway, let's get this done, shall we?"

Goku gave a tortured sigh. "Fine. What do you want me to do?"

"Well," Gojyo said, holding the banana up. "There are many secrets to a good hand job. The first is lube. I lick my palm, but you can use lotion or oil if you want. Although, if you plan on blowing the guy, then you don't want to do that."

"Okay, lick my palm."

Gojyo paused for a moment, and stared at Goku, as if he was waiting for something.

"What?"

"Lick your palm."

Goku opened his mouth to object, but Gojyo insisted. "Just lick it. Don't be a pussy."

Sighing, Goku licked the front of his hand. 'God, this is so embarrassing,' he thought.

"Get it nice and wet," Gojyo instructed. "Thatta boy. Now, the next thing you need to do is to grip it firmly. But not too firm- which I'm sure you know."

"Yes, I *do* know," Goku responded testily as he clutched the banana. "What next?"

Gojyo lit a cigarette, then reached over and put his hand over Goku's. "That should be firm enough. Okay- next you need to stroke."

"No shit."

"Give me the banana," Gojyo ordered. "Now, most people think they can just move their hands up and down and that's it. Wrong!"

'Oh, God, is he even listening to himself?' Goku wondered pitifully. 'Why me?'

"Not only should you move up and down, but around as well. Hey! Are you listening?"

"Yeah, sure," Goku said, disinterested.

"Great. You try."

Goku snatched the banana from him, and glared. Scoffing, he gripped it, and began to move his hand up and down.

"No, you *weren't* listening to me. You gotta move your wrists too, you dumb ape!" Gojyo complained, trying to seize the banana from him.

"Let go, I can do it!"

"You're also going too fast... here, let me show you."

"No!"

"Yes!"

"Let go!"

Suddenly the fruit ruptured beneath Goku's hand. "Ah, stop!" the boy exclaimed. "You broke it!"

"You idiot! You can't 'break' a banana!"

"Can too!" Goku held it up, and it drooped to the side.

"Ah, shit!" Gojyo stood up, rankled at the sight of the flimsy banana. "What do we do now?"

"I don't know. Get another banana?"

Gojyo paced the room for a moment, then, without warning, unzipped his pants and dropped them.

"What the hell are you doing?" Goku panicked. "Put your… pants back on!"

"Since you squished the banana, I guess this is the only thing we can do." Then, noticing Goku's fearful expression, he frowned. "Don't look at me like that. You've never seen a man jerk off before?"

"Yes… S-Sanzo," Goku stammered. "I don't want to see *you* jerk off, pervert!"

"Don't be such a baby. Goddamn," Gojyo replied, as he quickly dropped his boxers and sat on the bed.

Goku shielded his eyes, and got up to leave. "Fuck this!"

"Hey! Don't you leave, monkey!"

The boy stopped dead in his tracks, his hand on the doorknob. Squeezing his eyes shut, he contemplatedyingying, for the sake of Sanzo. Perhaps Gojyo really did have something worthwhile to teach. But part of him also wanted to stay because… because…

'No!' he said to himself. 'No way I want to see that dirty river boy's cock!'

Nervously, he turned around. "Fine! But don't even think we're going to touch each other! You really are the biggest pervert I know."

"Not without your permission," Gojyo said nonchalantly, as he lifted his hardness. Goku's eyes widened at the sight of his well-endowed member. *Very* well-endowed…

'Holy shit, it must be… at least... 9, 10 inches? No wonder he's so confident in the bedroom,' Goku thought in amazement. But even the sight of something so remarkable couldn't soften his anxiety.

As the boy sat next to him, Gojyo licked his palm and began to stroke. "Remember to go slowly…"

"Yeah," Goku said nervously as he stared intently at Gojyo's enormous arousal. The rest of his body was just as impressive- his tanned, athletic thighs, muscular stomach... Goku felt himself harden immediately.

'No,' he reminded himself. 'I can't get hard. It's *Gojyo*...'

"You gotta warm it up first." Gojyo spoke gently. Glancing at Goku he felt himself become even more aroused. The boy's large golden eyes fixated on him were as titillating as the incident in the park.

'I wonder if he even knows?' Gojyo thought as he continued to caress himself. 'But I need to instruct him, not get off on him.'

"You wanna try?" he asked as he turned to him. To his surprise, the boy already had his pants off and was stroking himself as well.

At this point, it was Gojyo who was pleasantly surprised. He knew that Goku's prudishness was all an act- but still, the sight of him shamelessly masturbating in front of him was completely unexpected.

'Well, I guess that takes care of that,' he thought.

"Now you're going a little too fast. Slow down," Gojyo reminded, slowly wrapping his fingers over the boy's hand. "Go slow... that's it... now move your wrist..."

The touch of Gojyo's hand made Goku's insides shiver with excitement. It was odd how he felt completely at ease with Gojyo touching him this way. Perhaps, after all those hands-on arguments in the jeep, he just got used to being touched by him.

As Goku breathed heavily, Gojyo gradually quickened the pace for both of them. It was a lot of work, giving two hand jobs at once, but the end would be worth the effort.

Goku lifted his hand away, allowing the half-demon to finish him off. "Faster," the boy whispered, as he lied down and pulled his shirt up. "Go... faster..."

Gojyo did as he was asked, and he put his lips to Goku's ear. "Does it feel good?" His deep, lulling voice made Goku feel like he was going to explode. And the boy's intense reaction made Gojyo that much closer to his own climax.

"Yes... ohhh..." Goku threw his head back and gasped as he felt the slow movement of Gojyo's hand stroking him, the friction made smooth by the wetness of a quick, yet wonderful orgasm.

And the moment he felt Goku come into his hand, Gojyo reached the height of his pleasure. He gasped as he fell onto the bed, revelling in the touch of the boy's pulsating heat.

After they finished, they both paused to catch their breath.

"So... how was it?" Gojyo asked after a few moments.

"Good," Goku replied. "For a hand job..."

"I told you I was sed."ed."

"Yeah," Goku whispered as he drifted off to sleep. "I'm tired..."

Gojyo took off his shirt as he stood up from the bed. "I'll go grab a towel, then..."

But before he could go, the door suddenly swung open. "Fuck!" he exclaimed, running into the bathroom.

"Hello guys," Hakkai said, smiling. But the expression on his face turned to bafflement as he watched Goku throw himself onto the other side of the bed, with his pants around his ankles.

"Shit!" Goku yelled, frantically trying to put his pants back on. "Don't you ever knock?"

"Uh..." Hakkai started, looking around the room. Then, laughing, he continued, "I just wanted to say that I'm having some trouble sleeping and was wondering if you wanted to play cards?"

"Yeah, me and Goku were planning on doing that anyway," Gojyo said, leaving the bathroom with towel in hand. "Sorry if I woke you up, man." 'Whew, thank God it's Hakkai and not Sanzo.'

"It's no problem. Now I see why you needed the banana."

Goku and Gojyo's faces turned pale as they looked at each other. "We didn't do anything like that," Gojyo insisted.

"Oh, sure," Hakkai teased. "You don't have to be embarrassed- I'm not one to judge."

"Dude, why would we need a banana? I've got my own banana!"

"Sometimes two bananas are better than one."

Gojyo blushed. "What? I don't *need* a banana! I'm not some bottom boy!"

"You know you take it up the ass, water sprite!" Goku laughed, zipping up his pants.

"What? No I don't!"

"Do too!"

"Man, you guys suck. Here's the towel, monkey."

~~

Sanzo stood by the window, smoking a cigarette and meditating on his suspicions. Sure they argued constantly, but they were still spending an obscene amount of time together.

'What the fuck for?' he wondered crossly. But it wasn't their deep, dark, secret that pissed him off so much. It was the realization that he was, in fact, insane with jealousy.

Yes, the stoical priest couldn't stand the thought of Goku spending time with another man. He was used to him always being around, yearning for his love and attention, and now that he seemed to have found someone else to give him attention...

Sanzo clenched his fists. 'I wonder if he's pulling this shit to *make* me jealous... after I hurt his feelings that night.'

His eye twitched as he reached for another cigarette. 'Fuck this shit...'

~~

Note to Nikki: Thanks for your review! Although Hakkai won't be involved in any sex acts, he definitely isn't out of the loop. I like to consider him an amused onlooker. But keep reading- I'm sure you'll be satisfied with his role in this fic!