Lies

Authors Note : OoOo I put it at the top for this Chapter! That\'s because I have some thank you\'s to deliver! I am really happy that people are enjoying this. I\'ve gotten a lot more hits on this story than I ever had on any other story that I\'ve posted anywhere else. Thank you to everyone who has reviewed too, that means a lot to me!

Tatijana - yeah...poor shu! I\'m a mean and horrible person...

Yit-Ha - thank you! And I will...enjoy the chapter!

Midnight - Thank you for giving me a chance. And I won\'t kill off Shu...I wouldn\'t be able to live with myself after that. And we will see if Yuki can make it better....and now we will find out how Yuki approaches the young Shu!

Tyr - here is the chapter you were asking for!!

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Shuichi hummed as he grabbed his keys to Yuki\'s apartment. He slowly and quietly opened the door, and darkness greeted him. He hiccuped quietly, and he frowned. He smelt like alcohol, and badly. Shuichi then closed the door, and locked it up again. He flicked on the living room lights and gasped.

\"Ack! Yuki, you scared me!\"

Yuki was sitting on the couch, his face hidden. There was something sitting in his lap, but Shuichi couldn\'t tell what is was. \"...we need to talk, Shuichi Shindou.\"

Shuichi glanced at Yuki, while his heart quickened. He then took a closer look at the item sitting in Yuki\'s lap, and realized that it was none other than his shoebox. Shuichi gasped, looked around, and then bolted towards the door. He wasn\'t fast enough though. By the time he tried turning the door knob Yuki was behind him, grabbing his waist and pulling him backwards. Shuichi screamed as he tried to get away from the other man. Yuki was far too strong and ended up almost throwing Shuichi away from the door. Shuichi collapsed on the floor and Yuki quickly pinned him beneath him. Shuichi\'s breathing quickened, and he shut his eyes close.

\"Look at me,\" Yuki said sternly and seriously. Shuichi shook his head, trying to get away. Yuki tightened his grip on Shuichi, and Shuichi gasped as pain shot through his arms. Yuki loosened his grip slightly, and spoke again. \"Look at me,\" Yet again, Shuichi shook his head. \"LOOK AT ME!\"

Shuichi\'s eyes snapped open, only to see tears sliding down Yuki\'s face. \"Yuki...I...\"

Yuki turned his head and looked at Shuichi\'s left arm. He slowly pulled down the sleeve of Shuichi\'s sweater. \"Yuki...no Yuki...no no no...\" Yuki ignored his lover\'s pleas and revealed the large, red scars that were cut into Shuichi\'s beautiful skin. Some looked quite fresh, and Yuki leaned down and kissed them lightly. Shuichi whimpered as he shut his eyes again, only to open them when Yuki\'s weight lifted off him. Yuki brought Shuichi in his lap, taking off his sweater to reveal another set of scars on Shuichi\'s right arm.

\"Where else,\" Yuki managed to choke, as Shuichi began to sob. Yuki repeated his question. \"...Where else...\"

Shuichi tried to curl into a ball, but Yuki stopped him. \"Yuki, no...stop it Yuki!\"

Yuki lifted up Shuichi\'s purple tank top, despite Shuichi\'s cries. Large scars were displayed on his stomach and chest. Yuki swallowed hard, and began planting small kisses on Shuichi\'s shoulders, running his fingers down the scars on Shuichi\'s stomach.

\"Yuki...I\'m so sorry...Yuki...\" Shuichi began crying again, and Yuki quickly wiped the tears away.

\"You don\'t need to tell me you\'re sorry. I just want to know why...\"

Shuichi whimpered, and yet again tried to climb out of Yuki\'s embrace. Yuki gripped on to Shuichi\'s waist, continuing to kiss up Shuichi\'s neck. \"...Why....\"

Shuichi shook his head, and began thrashing about. \"Let me go! Don\'t touch me Yuki! Please! Yuki let me go-\"

\"No,\"

Yuki stood up and picked up Shuichi like a child. Shuichi merely hid his face in Yuki\'s chest, sobbing silently. Yuki gently laid his lover on the bed, and Shuichi instantly curled up into a ball. \"Don\'t,\" Yuki warned as he took off his own shirt. He then grabbed Shuichi gently, turning him to face him as he laid on his side. Shuichi looked everywhere but in Yuki\'s eyes, trying to hide himself in the process. Yuki pulled him close, bringing their chests to one another.

\"...Why won\'t you talk to me?\"

Shuichi continued to look around nervously. Yuki kissed Shuichi\'s forehead lightly. \"We\'ll talk in the morning,\"

\"No Yuki...I don\'t...I don\'t...\"

Yuki cupped Shuichi\'s chin and forced him to look into his green eyes. Shuichi\'s eyes were filled with fear. \"Why don\'t you want to talk?\"

Shuichi shrugged. \"I don\'t know...I guess I don\'t know what to say...\"

\"Say what\'s on your mind,\"

Shuichi\'s eyes filled up with more tears. \"That\'s the thing. There is so much on my mind...\"

Yuki kissed Shuichi\'s forehead again, and stroked his face. \"Yuki...I\'m so scared...\" Shuichi buried his face into Yuki\'s chest, and a few minutes later, Shuichi was sound asleep. Yuki kept him close all night, as he tried to even out his own breathing. He was afraid of falling asleep, for fear of nightmares...and the fear of waking up to his Shuichi gone...

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Shuichi awoke, feeling nauseated. Yuki was simply staring at him, his green eyes faded slightly. Shuichi closed his eyes again, not wanting to look at the pain he caused the one who he swore would never hurt. He felt Yuki slide his hand down his back, pulling him close. Shuichi could feel his breath on his eyelids.

\"Good morning,\"

Shuichi slighty trembled, and Yuki planted a kiss on his lips. \" Are you going to get up now, or do you want to continue laying here?\"

Shuichi didn\'t answer, but merely opened his eyes and stared at Yuki\'s hands as they entertwined with his own. \"You wanna talk to me about it?\"

No answer. \"Well..you have to talk to someone. I know you have been drinking and cutting, and that is an addiction. You need help.\"

Shuichi stayed quiet, obviously trying to make the subject go away. But Yuki was not going to let him get off this easily. \"Do you want to get better?\"

He nodded, and Yuki sighed. \"Then you have to talk to someone. And you need to get help. I\'m here for you...\"

Shuichi then burst into tears, and tried climbing out of the bed. Yuki grabbed him as he sat upright, so that Shuichi was sitting in his lap with his back against Yuki\'s chest. He struggled against Yuki, crying out and sobbing. \"Yuki, let me go! I don\'t want help, I don\'t need it, please Yuki, I\'m fine! Please...\"

Yuki shook his head, placing his head on Shuichi\'s shoulder. \"You\'re not fine. Something is bothering you. Why else would you suddenly start drinking and cutting?\"

\"I don\'t know, and I don\'t care! Let me go!\"

\"I care, has that thought ever crossed your mind?!\"

Shuichi stopped struggling, and went limp. Yuki began caressing his lover, planting small kisses on his shoulder and neck.

\"I thought you didn\'t care.\"

Yuki stopped, and looked at Shuichi\'s face. He was staring at his arms, tears sliding down his face. \"What..?\"

\"I thought you didn\'t care.\" Shuichi repeated. Yuki turned Shuichi around, so that they were face to face. Shuichi began to twiddle his thumbs, not looking at Yuki.

\"Go on,\" Yuki encouraged, wanting to get Shuichi to talk.

Shuichi whimpered silently. \"You always brush me off, and I thought you didn\'t care. I thought you didn\'t love me. You\'re always in that god damn office of yours, and it feels like you\'re not in my life anymore. I thought you stopped loving me...and I didn\'t know what to do...\"

Yuki\'s heart dropped. He had caused such pain? \"I...I thought I was a nuisance to you. I wanted out...of your life. So that maybe you could...be happier...without me...\"

Yuki lifted Shuichi\'s face and kissed his shut eyelids. \"How could I be happier without you?\"

Shuichi\'s eyes fluttered open, and Yuki stroked his face. \"I\'m sorry you thought that way. I do love you. I just thought you would know that without me telling you,\"

\"But I\'m not like that Yuki. I need to hear it. I can\'t just assume it.\"

Yuki nodded, and brought Shuichi in his lap. \"I\'m sorry Shuichi.\" Yuki apologized, saying Shuichi\'s name to emphasize how truly sorry he was. Shuichi crawled into Yuki\'s arms, snuggling into his chest. \"I\'m sorry too Yuki.\"